Taking Control of Job Loss and Transition · 2015-12-01 · Taking Control of Job Loss and...

Taking Control of Job Loss

and Transition

Transcript and workbook

Taking Control of Job Loss and Transition

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IntroductionSurviving job loss and transition is a difficult experience for anyone. You probably want to become reemployed as soon as possible but you shouldn’t rush the process unless there is a new job immediately at hand. Instead, you need to take time to sort through your uncomfortable feelings and adjust to your changed circumstances. That way, you can begin to rebuild your future with hope and enthusiasm.

This course is about overcoming the distress associated with job loss and transition, whether you have experienced that loss or are just anticipating the possibility.

It will help you understand the normal adjustment process that each of us makes when we experience job loss and help you and your family make some sense out of your experience.

That way you will be happier, better prepared for a world of constant workplace change, and more likely to succeed at reemployment or whatever future path you choose.

Danger SignsThe distress of job loss and transition can be very upsetting, emotionally and physically. The good news is that your experience typically improves with (1) time and (2) if you take steps to help yourself cope. However:

� The impact of job loss is sometimes overwhelming.

� The impact sometimes triggers an illness or worsens a pre-existing health-related problem.

� Your spouse or partner can be at increased risk for problems, especially if your unemployment continues for more than a few months.

Seek help if any of the following occur continuously for more than two weeks or if they prevent you from carrying out your daily responsibilities:

1. A depressed mood with overwhelming feelings of sadness and grief.

2. Feelings of pessimism, hopelessness, or worthlessness.

3. A complete loss of interest in things you usually enjoy.

4. A complete loss of motivation (e.g. you cannot motivate yourself to do anything).

5. An increased desire to use drugs or alcohol to help yourself improve your mood.

6. Have a hereditary predisposition or family history of heart disease, depression or anxiety disorder, diabetes, or othermedical problems.

7. Have thoughts or feelings of self-harm or harming others.

8. Notice changes in your physical health.

A special note about angerIf you feel anger at your situation, perhaps blaming someone or something for your distress, and you are thinking about acting upon that anger (sabotage, revenge, or being aggressive towards someone or something) don’t do it. Anger is a common experience after losing a job. But nothing good results from acting on those angry feelings in destructive ways. And any potential employer will know if you are feeling anger towards a former employer or situation, because it will be like carrying a “chip on your shoulder.” If you are destructive, you may irreversibly harm others or your relationship with others, develop a drug or alcohol abuse problem, make yourself ill, cause sorrow to loved ones, and/or bring legal problems upon yourself.

I. Understanding your lossIf you expect to just pick yourself up and carry on as usual after a job loss, you are probably expecting too much. In reality, you need to take time to reflect upon what has happened to allow yourself to feel things like grief, disappointment, self-doubt, and even anger.

These are very normal feelings following any loss and working through them is necessary in order that you can heal and move forward.

The information in this section will help you understand the process of mental and emotional adjustment that you may be experiencing. It will also help you determine whether your experience is normal or whether you should consider getting a little extra help in order to better cope.

Your first experience: Alarm or shockTypically, the first experience you have when told of an impending job loss is alarm.

You may say to yourself “I can’t believe this is happening” or “I don’t believe it.” You may feel numb, startled, or angered. And you may have difficulty carrying on from day to day, find it difficult to concentrate, and experience feelings of grief or great sadness.

At this early stage, it’s important to find someone with whom you are comfortable talking about your experience and how you feel. Don’t numb your feelings with alcohol or mood-altering substances, don’t shut everyone out of your life, and don’t ignore the seriousness of your situation.

At the same time, remind yourself that you have coped with difficult situations in the past and that you will be able to get through this, too. And remind yourself that many people have been in your position before and they have moved on to good or even better jobs. It is possible. But it won’t happen overnight. And it won’t happen without some effort on your part.

You aren’t crazy, or weak, or unusual in any way. What you are experiencing is normal. Your job is important to you (for more reasons than just money) and so losing that job is a difficult, but not impossible, hurdle to overcome.

Your next experience: Denial or oppositionIt is very common to deny the full impact of a job loss or transition in the days or weeks that follow the announcement.

You may have been shocked or grief-stricken at first, but later you may be feeling “this is wrong, I’ve given too much to this company to be in this position now” or “something will change and I won’t actually lose my job.”

It is important to remain optimistic about the future, and hopeful that perhaps a mistake has been made or that you aren’t really losing your job, but it’s even more important to be realistic. You need to acknowledge the current reality of your situation and begin to prepare for the consequences.

Allow yourself to confront and examine your emotions. Talk openly and candidly with close friends.

Don’t deny that you are losing your job when the reality of the situation is that you are.

At this time, you need all of your energy and all of your effort and all of your attention to be focused on taking care of yourself, your family or loved ones, and preparing yourself for the future. You should not be denying your situation or covering up your true feelings. The sooner you begin to accept your situation and deal realistically and responsibly with it, the sooner you will begin to rebuild your future.


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A later experience: AcceptanceOnce you begin to accept the reality of your situation you will begin to focus your efforts on moving forward.

You may still feel periods of anger or sadness or anxiety but as long as these feelings are less intense and less persistent over time, you are progressing.

You are moving forward.

Once you reach this stage, which can be weeks or months following the first announcement of your job loss or transition, you are ready to focus on the future.

You are ready to begin to rebuild.


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Try these quick tips• For an energizing meal or snack, try cereal with skim milk or a bagel with non-fat cream cheese, chicken, turkey, or

tuna.

• For a calming meal or snack, eat crackers, a baked potato, dried fruit, whole-grain bread, pretzels, rice cakes, or air-popped popcorn.

• Don’t skip breakfast. Your body needs the energy in the morning and you might overeat at lunch.

• Avoid sugary breakfasts (e.g., a donut) which can cause your mood to slump later that morning.

• Keep alert in the afternoon by eating a small low-fat lunch rich in protein like chicken breast, tuna, yogurt or a greensalad with fresh fruit.

• To wind down at the end of the day, choose pasta, rice, or potatoes with your dinner plus a salad.

II. Coping ToolsThis section is about finding solutions that can help you feel better about yourself and about your job loss or transition. It is about taking steps to make sense out of your experience and begin to prepare yourself for your future.

It is about getting back to the basics of self-care. It is about expressing yourself and making sense of your experience. It is about changing your self-talk so that you don’t criticize yourself or second-guess yourself. And it is about reducing your stress so that you have more energy and more effort to put towards finding reemployment and rebuilding your future.

1: Eat wellYou may be feeling exhausted from the weight of your situation or because you have been frantically trying to find new employment. A good place to start coping with job loss is to get back to the basics of self-care.

The pressures of job loss and transition can cause your weight to fluctuate and drain your body’s vitamin supply. Consequently, you need to ensure that you provide your body with proper nourishment. Eat a good, balanced diet, even if you don’t feel like eating.

Be sure that your daily food choices include:

• Grain products. For example, whole grain cereal or bread, barley or brown rice, bran flour in muffins, pasta.

• Vegetables and fruit. Particularly the dark green and orange varieties like broccoli, carrots, and oranges.

• Milk and milk products. For example, yogurt, cottage cheese, puddings.

• Meat and lean protein alternatives. For example, chicken, fish, lentils, eggs, peanut butter, tofu.Few added fats. Forexample, use low-fat versions of salad dressing, low-fat condiments such as mustard and salsa rather than mayonnaise.


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2: Develop good sleep habitsGood sleep habits can improve your mood and ensure that you have physical and mental energy for coping with your transition and building your future. So it’s important to develop regular, dependable, sleep habits.

Everyone has different sleep requirements, so use your own internal wisdom about how much sleep is right for you. However, good sleep habits are important for everyone. Try these tips.

• Do something relaxing, like reading a book or taking a warm bath before going to bed.

• Avoid caffeine-containing foods (e.g. chocolate) and beverages (e.g. coffee, tea, and soft drinks, especially colas) at least 4hours before bedtime.

• If you are not asleep approximately 1/2 hour after lying down, get up and read or do something relaxing until you feeldrowsy. Then, go back to bed.

• Never use your bed for activities other than sleeping and intimacy. For example, don’t lie in bed eating while watchingtelevision. Keep the bed a place for rest.

• Avoid alcohol in the evening. Even a small amount of alcohol (e.g. a glass of sherry) can later awaken you, and largeramounts of alcohol will interfere with the quality of your sleep.

• Try the relaxation techniques from the “reduce tension” section of this course, while lying in bed. For example, tryvisualizing a peaceful, calm scene.

If you still have trouble falling asleep, see your physician. Sometimes this sleeplessness is a sign of depression and will be helped when the depression is treated, and sometimes the physician may prescribe a brief period of sleep-aid medication (note: any medication to aid sleeping should only be used for a few days, not on a regular basis).


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3. Get activeThis may surprise you, but a proven research finding is that one of the most effective ways to improve your health and alleviate stress, worry, sadness, and even anger, is through regular activity and exercise. Thus, if you want to cope with the emotional impact of job loss and transition, and experience more energy, get active!

Just about any kind of activity or exercise is helpful (e.g. walking, cycling, tennis, even gardening) because it helps release tension, helps clear your mind of distressing thoughts, and improves your overall fitness level.

An ideal combination of activity involves aerobic, stretching, and toning exercises.

• Aerobic activity involves repetitive movements of large muscle groups. This kind of activity helps strengthen yourcardiovascular system and increase stamina. Examples include jogging, swimming, brisk walking, bicycling, and tennis.

• Stretching activity is slow, sustained, and relaxing. The goal is to decrease muscle tension, improve flexibility, andmaintain joint mobility. Yoga is a good example of stretching.

• Toning activities focus on firming specific muscle groups. Examples include weight lifting (resistance training), sit-ups,stomach crunches, and push-ups.

Step 1: Determine your pre-activity fitness levelIf you are not used to exerting yourself, be cautious before increasing your activity level because it can lead to injury (e.g. muscle strain) which, in turn, could frustrate you.

If you lead a fairly sedentary lifestyle, are overweight, smoke, or have any limiting health conditions, always increase your activity levels slowly (e.g. increase your distance or pace of walking very gradually over time).

A good way to determine your readiness for activity, and the amount and frequency of activity that will be helpful for you, is to consult your doctor or health care provider.

Additionally, consult your doctor if any of the following symptoms emerge during activity: dizziness, irregular heart beats, a tightness or pressure in your chest, shoulders, arms, or neck, or if you feel extreme exhaustion or breathlessness after you have stopped the activity.

Otherwise, if all systems are go, proceed to step 2!

Step 2: Consider these questionsWhen planning to increase your activity level, consider these kinds of questions:

• Do you want to improve cardiovascular functioning or weight management (emphasis on aerobic activities), muscleflexibility (emphasis on stretching), or improve tone and strength (strengthening activities)? Or some combination ofthese?

• Do you prefer indoor or outdoor activity? Being alone or with others? Competition (e.g. sports) or not?

• How much time are you willing to devote to improving your activity level and controlling your stress? What time of day isbest for you to be active?


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Step 3: Consider your activity optionsActivities of light intensity include:

• strolling

• gardening

• playing Frisbee

• bowling

• yoga (gentle forms, e.g. Hatha yoga)

Activities of moderate intensity include:

• brisk walking

• biking

• dancing

• push-ups or sit-ups or light weight lifting

• climbing stairs

• tennis

• in-line skating

• swimming

• yoga (moderate forms, e.g. PowerYoga orAshtanga Yoga)

Activities of vigorous intensity include:

• jogging

• aerobics

• yoga (power forms)

• jumping jacks

• soccer

• squash

• rope jumping

Step 4: Establish activity goalsConsider the information from the preceding steps and set some specific goals for yourself.

For example, if you like to exercise with others and have a daily lunch break, consider a brisk walk with friends for half of your break (the other for eating your lunch). Be sure that your goals are specific, achievable, and motivating.

Use the space below to record your activity goals for the upcoming week, two weeks from now, and one month from now.


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Step 5: Identify any obstacles to increasing your activity levelWhat might interfere with your plans or goals for increased activity (e.g. motivation, forgetfulness, lack of equipment, lack of time, uncertain how to perform an activity)?

Describe your potential obstacles in the space below and how you will deal with them if they arise.

For example: “My biggest obstacle is motivation. So I will plan to exercise with a friend and we will help motivate each other.”

Step 6: Track your progress with a daily activity diary

Successful change requires that you track your progress so that you know when you are being successful at increasing your activity level.

A daily activity diary can help. Here, you record:

• Your activity throughout the day, including a description of the activity.

• The duration and intensity of the activity.

• Any comments or thoughts you had before, during, and after the activity.

At the end of this action plan there is a “daily activity diary” that you can use. Photocopy or print extra copies for yourself and use these as long as you like or until activity becomes a habit in your life and you find that you no longer need to keep track of your progress.

Step 7: Reward yourself Finally, a good action plan includes a reward to celebrate your success. How will you reward your progress? How often will you reward yourself? Use the space below to describe your plan to reward yourself.

For example: “At the end of a successful week of lunch-break walking, I will reward myself by going to a movie with a friend” or “when I finish two weeks of attending the regular yoga classes at my fitness centre, I will reward myself by shopping for some new clothing.”


© 2011 Homewood Human Solutions™ 10

Exercise/Daily Activity DiaryWeek of:

ActivityDuration or

intensity (low, med, high)

Comments (how did you feel

afterwards)

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday


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4. Express yourself

A very effective way to manage your experience of job loss and transition is to express yourself--whether with others (e.g. a friend) or through writing.

Expressing yourself is a powerful coping technique. Studies show that people who express themselves are better able to cope with job loss, experience less distress, and are actually more likely to become reemployed. This is because (1) they don’t carry distressing emotions around with them, especially to a job interview, and (2) they feel better and have more energy to focus on job searching.

By expressing yourself, you sort through the “why” and “how” of your experience and begin to make sense of your experience in your own mind.

Try the following action planner. In a few months time, you will find that you:

• Attain a state of peace about your experience.

• Have a new perspective on these events.

• Find new learning or a ‘life lesson’ from your experience. And,

• Feel empowered and in control of your own destiny.

Step 1: Choose your confidant wiselyIf you choose to express yourself by talking with someone, choose that person wisely. Consider the following:

• Choose a person who is not in the same situation as you (i.e. not a co-worker who is also out of work). Otherwise, you mayfuel each other’s distress.

• Choose someone who has been supportive of you in the past and not unreasonably critical of your decisions.

• Choose someone who will lend a supportive ear and keep your conversation private.

Step 2: Consider writing your thoughts downAnother effective means of expressing yourself is through journal writing or writing thoughts down. Research has shown that writing can reduce the impact of job loss and even improve your chances of finding reemployment. This is because expressing yourself through writing is a very effective means of releasing tension, gaining perspective, and achieving a sense of control over your future.

If you choose to express yourself through writing, set aside at least 20 minutes, three or four days each week and write for the entire time even if you are repeating yourself. Be as specific as possible, describing what is going through your mind, what is troubling you (not just day-to-day events) and why you feel the way you do.


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Step 3: Be specificRegardless of how you express yourself (through conversation or writing) you will get the most benefit if you are as specific as possible in defining your thoughts and feelings.

• If you feel anxious, say so. And say exactly why.

• If you blame yourself for something, say so, and explain the circumstances surrounding that.

Even feelings that seem unreasonable or unjustified need to be explored. The more precisely and honestly you do, the greater benefit you will receive.

Step 4: Consider professional helpSometimes you may need to express yourself to a professional. This may be a counsellor, psychologist, clergy person, or your health care provider. If your feelings are overwhelming or significantly interfering with your ability to carry out daily activities and responsibilities, be sure to seek this help. If you are unable to pay for this service, look for low cost or free alternatives (e.g. community resources, family service agencies, a company sponsored employee assistance program). A starting point to find these services is your health care provider (e.g. family doctor) or community crisis phone line.

Step 5: Consider taking part in a support groupYou may choose to join a group of people in a similar situation, such as a job search group, through a career transition centre offered by your employer.

This can be very helpful because it provides you with an opportunity to share experiences, information, and encouragement. It can also provide job leads.

The only caution when doing this is ensuring that the group stays focused on problem-solving and support, and that someone is in charge of ensuring that the group remains positive and future-focused.



Step 6: Make a plan for actionBased on what you have learned in this section, what can you begin to do differently that will help you to express yourself (e.g. who will you speak to, what support group is available for you to join, when will you begin writing in a journal)?

Below, describe your first step (e.g. “this week, I will call my friend Thomas and ask him to go for a coffee with me and I will talk to him about my concerns”).

Step 7: Plan for any obstaclesAn important part of any action plan is anticipating any obstacles that may prevent you from putting your action into place.

For example, you may plan to get together with your friend, but he or she may not be available to meet with you. What will you do then?

In the space below, consider your intended action (from the previous step) and plan for any obstacles that might interfere with taking this action and how you will respond to them. The better you plan for an obstacle, the more likely you will be to achieve your intended action.


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5. Think optimisticallyWhat is going through your mind during this period of job loss or transition? Are you saying to yourself “I’m going to lose everything I have”, “I’m a good person. I don’t deserve this”, or “I’ll never find another job like this one.”

These thoughts (i.e. the things you are saying to yourself ) have a powerful influence over your mood and your behavior. Specifically, your own thoughts can make you feel frustrated, distraught, or anxious, and they can lead you to give up trying to find reemployment. However, in similar fashion, your thoughts can improve your mood and give you strength and confidence to pursue new opportunities. All it takes is learning how to change negative, unreasonable, and/or inaccurate thoughts into positive, optimistic, and accurate ones.

So it’s important to change negative, unreasonable, and/or inaccurate thoughts into positive, optimistic, and accurate ones.

Negative thoughts:

• Foretell failure, suffering, or disappointment (e.g. ‘things will only get worse’).

• Negatively evaluate a thing or another person (e.g. ‘he is an idiot’).

• Generalize about things (e.g. ‘I am a failure’ or ‘I can’t escape my past’).

Positive thoughts:

• Are optimistic (e.g. ‘I am going to succeed’, ‘things will turn out okay’).

• Positively evaluate a thing or another person (e.g. ‘that’s a great idea’).

• Are realistic (e.g. ‘I can cope with this even if I make a mistake’).

Lie on the floor, or sit comfortably in a chair.

Close your eyes and bring your attention to your breathing.

Breathe slowly and fully through your nose to a very slow count such as this:

Breathe in and hold….one…two…three….and breathe out….one…two….three.

Be sure that you breathe deeply enough that you expand your abdomen fully.

Each time you breathe in, pause for a moment when your lungs are full and then slowly exhale through your lips…

Again, to a slow count of one…two…three.

As you exhale try to focus on moving lower back pressing towards the floor or into the back of your chair.

Be sure that you expel all of the air from the bottom of your lungs…

And repeat this five or six times…each time inhaling slowly and fully and exhaling slowly and fully.

Begin by clearing your mindThe first step towards changing your thinking is to pause for a moment and calm yourself. This will help clear your mind of negative thoughts and leave you open to other ways of thinking and being more reasonable about the situation you are in. Try the following:

To aid in clearing you mind, try visualizing a pleasant scene (e.g. a tropical beach or a balloon floating upwards into the sky).

Now that your mind is clear, try the action plan that follows.


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Change your thinking: Action planStep 1. Check your thinkingCheck whether your thoughts are reasonable and positive. Ask yourself questions like these:

• Is what I am thinking 100% true?

• Have I ever experienced something that proves what I am thinking is not true?

• Am I being reasonable?

• Am I blaming myself for something over which I have no control?

• Am I jumping to conclusions?

• What am I afraid might happen?

What do you conclude about your thinking?

Step 2. Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughtsTo replace negative thoughts with positive, optimistic, and hopeful thoughts, ask yourself questions like these:

• What would I tell my best friend if they were thinking this way?

• What is a more positive, realistic way of thinking about this situation?

• What can I begin to tell myself that will help me feel better?

• When I coped well with something like this in the past, what did I tell myself then?

What do you conclude? Write a more positive, optimistic, hopeful thought for yourself in the space below.

Step 3. Change your thinking: Get some perspectiveIf you have trouble changing your own thinking, try getting some perspective on it. Try to step back from your own point of view and see if you can think of other possible ways to look at the situation you are in. Try any of the following:

A. Talk to a supportive friend

Tell them what you are experiencing and thinking.

• What do they say?

• What is their reaction?

• Do they say things that contradict your thoughts?


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B. Find someone who is in a similar situation and who is coping well

Ask them what they are saying to themselves to help them cope.

C. Write your thoughts down

Write your thoughts down on a piece of paper (e.g. a journal or diary). This helps you release the tension associated with your thoughts and see them more objectively. Look at what you’ve written and see if you can find something to change about it.

Step 4. Put new thinking into actionOnce you have identified your negative, stressful thinking and come up with new ways of thinking, you need to put these new thoughts into practice in your life.

Create a positive, realistic, optimistic statement that you can tell yourself.

For example: “The next time I start to feel distraught about my situation I will tell myself “I am going to be okay. I will rise above this.”

Step 5. Identify obstaclesWhat might interfere with using your new, positive thoughts (e.g. motivation, forgetfulness, unsure how to be positive)? Describe your potential obstacles in the space below and how you will deal with them if they arise.

For example: “My biggest obstacle is that I will forget to use my positive self-talk. So I will plan to use my positive self-talk beforehand.”


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Step 6. Track your progressSuccessful change requires that you track your progress so that you know when you are being successful at changing your thinking. How will you keep track of your progress?

Write the details of what you can do below.

For example: keep a journal or daily diary, write down your positive thoughts every time you use them, post a “calendar of success” on your refrigerator, etc.

Step 7. Reward yourselfFinally, a good action plan includes a reward to celebrate your success. How will you reward your progress? How often will you reward yourself?

For example: “The next time I remember to use positive thoughts, I will buy myself a fun magazine to read” or “at the end of each week I’ll reward myself by attending a movie with a friend.”


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6. Reduce tensionFollowing job loss or during job transition, stress-related tension is almost inevitable. Apart from being an uncomfortable burden, stress-related tension can lead to a variety of problems such as headaches, back pain, and exhaustion, to name a few.

Despite the fact that each of us may experience tension slightly differently, anyone can learn to release that tension. All it takes is:

• Knowing how to relax.

• Practicing relaxation techniques. And,

• Choosing a technique that works best for you.

The following steps present different relaxation options. Experiment with them until you find the most effective method of relaxation for you. Alternatively, use different techniques on different occasions.

Note: Each of these techniques is presented with step-by-step instruction. Until you master the exercise, you may want to make an audio recording to help direct you.

Close your eyes and ask yourself what sounds you are aware of.

For example, are you aware of the sound of traffic outside your window?

Or perhaps the sound of someone talking far off in the distance?

Or the sound of a radio or a television in another room?

Take note of the sounds that are around you,

And slowly shift your attention to your body and to your physical state.

Start with your head and work down towards your toes,

Mentally scanning your body and taking note of your body’s sensations.

For example, perhaps you are aware of a slight itch at the back of your neck,

Or a tightness in your abdomen.

Once you have scanned your entire body for any areas of tension,

Open your eyes and take a mental note of where you tend to hold tension in your body.

Reduce tension: Identify areas of tensionBefore you begin to relax you should first determine where you hold tension in your body. For some people, this may be the head, neck or back. For others, it may be the stomach, etc..


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Place one of your hands upon your stomach somewhere around your belly button area,

Then place the other hand on your chest, right in the centre.

And for the next few moments, as you sit still and breathe normally,

Take note of the pattern of movement of your two hands.

As you breathe in and breathe out, does one hand move more than the other?

Does the lower hand move more than the upper hand?

Does the upper hand move more than the lower hand?

Do both hands move at about the same amount?

If your upper hand moves more than your lower hand, you are breathing in a short and shallow fashion that will contribute to stress.

If your lower hand moves more than your upper hand, you are breathing in a deep and full fashion and this will help manage your stress.

As you take a few more moments to notice your breathing try to breathe in deeply and exhale fully so that you feel your lower hand moving inwards and outwards.

Spend a few moments practicing this full deep relaxed breathing, using the movements of your hands as a sign that can tell you whether or not you are breathing in a relaxed fashion or a stressed fashion.

Reduce tension: Identify your breathing patternDeep, full, relaxed breathing is a powerful and profound way of releasing tension and controlling stress. To become aware of your pattern of breathing, try the following.


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Lie on the floor, or sit comfortably in a chair, with one hand resting around your stomach area, and with the other hand resting somewhere near the top of your chest.

Close your eyes and bring your attention to your breathing.

Breathe slowly and fully through your nose to a very slow count such as this:

Breathe in and hold….one…two…three….and breathe out….one…two….three.

As you inhale try to focus on causing your lower hand to move up and down with each full breath inwards.

Be sure that you breathe deeply enough that you expand your abdomen and feel your lower hand moving inwards and outwards.

Each time you breathe in, pause for a moment when your lungs are full and then slowly exhale through your lips…

Again, to a slow count of one…two…three.

As you exhale try to focus on moving your lower hand move inwards towards your back as if you are pulling inward

And feel your lower back pressing towards the floor or into the back of your chair,

Be sure that you expel all of the air from the bottom of your lungs…allowing your hands to collapse naturally inwards towards your body,

Repeat this five or six times…each time inhaling slowly and fully and exhaling slowly and fully,

Reduce tension: Breathe to relaxTry this breathing technique that is designed to help you relax and release tension.

Once you have practiced this technique a few times each day over the course of one week, you will be able to call upon your skill of relaxed breathing anywhere at anytime. You do not have to lie down to do this, the purpose of lying down in the early stages is just to be sure that you recognize when you are breathing deeply and that you train yourself to do so at will.

A modified version for daily use is as follows:

Sit comfortably in a chair.

Breathe in deeply and slowly and say to yourself “breathe in relaxation.”

After pausing for a moment, breathe out fully from your abdomen and say to yourself “and release tension.” Pause again before you inhale.

Use this technique on any occasion when you want to release tension (e.g. while sitting in traffic, standing in line, while waiting on the telephone “on hold”, etc.).


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Reduce tension: Relax your musclesA good technique to relax your entire body is to alternately tense and relax each of the major muscle groups in your body, as you breathe deeply and fully. With this technique, you need to alternate between tension and relaxation. Specifically, try to make your muscles tense, holding that tension for a few moments, and then, all at once, release the tension while thinking to yourself “relax.”

The point of this exercise is to first cause yourself to experience tension, hold that tension, and suddenly release it. You will find that this helps you attain a more relaxed state than if you simply try to relax from a normal, non-tensed position (it’s kind of like swinging a pendulum...to get the pendulum to swing far to one side, you first pull it far to the other side and let go).

A couple of important points:

• When you release the tension in the muscles, let it go all at once, not slowly. Let your muscles become suddenly limp.

• Be cautious about tensing your muscles too much (especially those in your neck and back). As well, over tightening yourfeet muscles can lead to a cramp.

• Most people have only limited success when they first try this exercise. However, once you practice this twice a day fortwo weeks (e.g. upon awakening and upon going to sleep) you will find that you can use it to attain a more relaxed statethan you have ever experienced. It is a profoundly powerful technique of relaxation once you become skilled at it.


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Sit in a comfortable chair and curl both hands into fists

At the same time, tightening your forearms and your biceps.

Hold the tension for a few moments.

Keep holding and all at once…let go of the tension…just…relax.

Let’s do that one more time.

Tighten curl both hands into fists, tighten your forearms and your biceps, and hold the tension for a few moments.

Keep holding and all at once, let the tension go…and just relax.

Next, wrinkle your face, almost as if you are smelling something awful…purse your lips…and raise your eyebrows.

Now hold this tension in your face for a few moments…keep holding…continuing to breathe normally…

And all at once, let the tension go…just, relax.

Let’s do that one more time.

Wrinkle your face, almost as if you are smelling something awful…purse your lips…and raise your eyebrows.

Now hold this tension in your face for a few moments…keep holding…continuing to breathe normally…

And all at once, let the tension go…just, relax.

Next, slightly round your back and tighten your abdomen, keep breathing normally, and hold this for a few moments, then all at once let the tension go, and relax.

Let’s do that again.

Slightly round your back and tighten your abdomen, keep breathing normally, and hold this for a few moments, then all at once let the tension go, and relax.

Finally, tense your feet by lifting your toes upward, tightening your shins.

Hold this for a few moments, breathing normally, and all at once, let the tension go, and relax.

And one more time.

Tense your feet by lifting your toes upward, tightening your shins.

Hold this for a few moments, breathing normally, and all at once, let the tension go, and relax.

Now spend a few moments focusing on your deep relaxed breathing and paying allowing all of the muscles in your body to relax…just let the tension flow away from you…with each breath inwards, breathe in feelings of relaxation and calm….and with each breath outwards, release any tension and any stress.


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Lie down, close your eyes, and relax. Take slow, deep breaths, and, as you spend a few minutes in this position, think about any of the following:

Warm, beautiful colors, fading from one hue to another (e.g. a warm red fading to a pale blue).

A beach scene, with the palms swaying gently in the warm breeze and the ocean waves lapping against white sand.

A favorite image from the present or your childhood (e.g. watching your puppy bounce through some tall grass).

Any special place that holds meaning and peace for you.

Reduce tension: VisualizationYour imagination is a powerful tool to help you relax. It simply involves pairing a peaceful, relaxing image with another relaxation technique (e.g. visualization paired with relaxed breathing).

Keep in mind:

• When using visualization try using all of your senses. Imagine what your peaceful scene sounds like, what it smells like,what you can feel.

• Be sure that you are free from other distractions or interruptions for the period that you are doing the relaxation exercise(e.g. turn off your pager, put a “do not disturb” sign on your door).

• Visualization is fun. Let your imagination run free and wild. You can imagine anything you want.

Try the following.


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Reduce tension: Action planTo master a technique of relaxation you need to practice. The goal of practicing relaxation is to become so skilled at relaxing that you can invoke a relaxed state whenever and wherever you need to.

Step 1. Choose a relaxation technique

Choose a technique of relaxation, or a combination of techniques (e.g. breathing or a combination of breathing and visualization). Use the space below to record your choice.

Step 2. Identify obstacles

What might interfere with trying your chosen technique of relaxation (e.g. motivation, forgetfulness, unsure how to relax)?

Describe your potential obstacles in the space below and how you will deal with them if they arise. For example: “My biggest obstacle is that I will forget to practice. So I will post a reminder by my bed that I will see before getting out of bed in the morning, and upon going to bed at night.”

Step 3. Track your progress

Successful change requires that you track your progress so that you know when you are being successful at relaxation.

At the end of this section there is a relaxation practice log that you can use to keep track of your progress. If you prefer, you can keep track of your progress in a notebook or journal of your choosing. Whatever method you choose, be sure that your practice log contains a measure of your state of relaxation before and after your practice session.

Step 4. Reward yourself

Finally, a good action plan includes a reward to celebrate your success. How will you reward your progress? How often will you reward yourself?

For example: “When I finish my first week of practice, I will reward myself by going out to a fun movie with a friend.”


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Relaxation Practice LogUse this 10-point scale before and after you practice a relaxation technique.

0 2 4 6 8 10

Not at all stressed. Extremely stressed. Completely calm. Most stress I have felt.

Technique Tension (before)

Tension (after) Notes

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday


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7. Fuel your esteem

One of the most common experiences during job loss or transition is lowered self-esteem. This is because in addition to money, work offers a sense of identity, purpose, meaning, and social connection.

Each of these adds to your sense of esteem.

Adding insult to injury, you may be job hunting and experiencing the inevitable barrage of rejections and refusals. Or the opportunities you thought existed are not coming true. This, too, can deplete your sense of esteem.

A strategic plan for keeping your esteem high is essential. With high esteem, you will have more stamina to pursue job opportunities. Additionally, you will be that much more attractive to potential employers.

This section is about fueling your esteem. It is about discovering what is important in your life, rekindling passion that you may have lost, staying connected to the people and activities that provide meaning and support to you, and keeping your spirit alive.

Step 1: Know your strengthsA very effective means for fueling your spirit is to make a list of your personal strengths, talents, and accomplishments.

On a piece of paper, list 10 responses for each of the following:

• Your work-related accomplishments or the specific tasks you did well in a job or project.

• The things that you have done for other people (e.g. helping out a friend).

• Any major difficulties you have overcome (e.g. a health concern) and try to recall, as specifically as possible, how youmanaged to turn these difficulties into challenges or opportunities.

Challenge yourself to list at least 10 things.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.


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Step 2: Reflect upon your strengthsReflect upon what you have written in step 1.

Remind yourself that the personal qualities that previously led to success can work for you again.

You always carry these qualities with you because they are part of who you are, and no challenging circumstance, including job loss or transition, can take them away.

Step 3: Think beyond defining yourself by a jobYour spirit (or esteem) is far too complex to be defined narrowly by the job you held (or currently hold) or your income. Work is something that you engage in to help benefit your life or the lives of people important to you. In similar fashion, you can decide to do something of value that will contribute to your life or the life of others that doesn’t involve employment (e.g. build, create, volunteer).

Until you find yourself fully employed in a position that you are satisfied with, what action can you begin to take that will help contribute to your life or the life of another (e.g. volunteer)?


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8. Reduce money worriesA good money management plan during times of job loss and transition can greatly ease the burden of financial worries.

The good news is that studies suggest that one half to one third of displaced workers will find employment income equal to or greater than what they were earning at their previous jobs. And, when there is a pay cut, it is usually only about 10 to 15 percent.

Regardless of your future job prospects it is critical that you create a money management plan right now. A good money management plan enables you to work towards your job goals while not putting your long-term financial goals at risk.

This section presents some basic money management tips and some new ways of thinking about money.

Step 1: Accept the reality of your situationYour lifestyle needs to change during this period. And this means restraint.

A common trap that many people find themselves in following job loss is denying that they need to change their lifestyle. Or, in order to cope with feeling unhappy or worried, they make non-essential purchases in an effort to feel better.

However, it is critical that you evaluate your current financial status and make some changes.

Hopefully, these changes will be temporary.

Even if you find new employment and new sources of income quickly, it is advantageous to look at your current financial situation and reevaluate how you manage your money. This not only eases your mind in the immediate term, but it makes you less vulnerable to fluctuations in future income.

This doesn’t mean you have to eliminate every unnecessary expenditure and restrain yourself from any spending, whatsoever. Just be cautious and realistic. For example, if you have been planning a family vacation for a long time, and now find yourself out of work, consider whether or not canceling that vacation is a good idea (it may be possible to take the vacation, but be frugal in your traveling expenses).

Step 2: Check your company’s severance plan and benefit plans Find out if your company has a severance plan. If so, it may be advisable to take this package in smaller, regular payments (to help reduce your stress) rather than one lump sum. However, if you are near retirement, you may choose to take a lump sum. Be sure to make this decision carefully (with the guidance of a professional).

Also, try to take advantage of any continued benefits that are available to you, such as medical or dental. If these are not continued for you, find out whether or not you can contribute as an ex-employee.

Finally, consider whether you need to apply for government unemployment benefits. You may be entitled.



Step 3: Get professional financial adviceIt is critical that you find expert advice during this period. This may mean securing the help of a certified financial planner and/or taking advantage of any company-sponsored financial management counselling opportunities or seminars.

A certified financial planner can:

• Help you decide what company severance or benefit options to choose.

• Advise you on how to manage and protect your assets and savings.

• Help you decide how to best manage any debts (e.g. credit card debt). And,

• Help you honestly evaluate your current money needs.

When choosing an individual to assist you, be sure that this person is a certified financial planner, trained to give financial advice. You may also want to look for someone who offers advice for a fee, rather than whose service is based on commission (in the former case, they may be more objective; in the latter case, they benefit from selling certain products such as insurance policies or mutual funds).

Receiving sound, professional, objective advice is your goal.

Step 4: Follow a budgetCreate a detailed and accurate budget (see a sample on the last page of this printout). List all sources of income or savings and all weekly expenditures (e.g. housing costs, food and beverage, entertainment, transportation).

Review this budget carefully and ask yourself where you can lower or eliminate expenditures (e.g. entertainment or clothing).

Do this separately for yourself, your spouse or partner, and any dependants.

As well, ask your spouse or partner and dependants to contribute ideas for cost-saving strategies (rather than dictate what they should do). If they are part of creating the budget they will find it easier to stick to.

Step 5: Bring in extra incomeTry bringing in extra income from short-term contract or consulting work. Not only does this help from a money perspective, but a prospective employer will be impressed by your resourcefulness and industriousness (i.e. you can demonstrate that you have kept yourself active during your job-seeking period).

You can market your skills through your social network, posting advertisements in shopping malls or community centres, or in the newspaper. As well, your company may offer a job placement service which you can use.


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Step 6: Stop using creditPut away your credit cards. Stop using credit. You are far more likely to spend money beyond your budget, or money that you don’t have, if you carry credit cards. This is because you are more likely to buy something on impulse, rather than out of necessity, and you are likely to spend money that you don’t actually have.

If you don’t have the will power and discipline to stop carrying credit cards, or to stop using them indiscriminately, destroy them. You can always reapply when you have established a steady employment income once again.

At the same time, you may want to consider securing a reasonable line of credit from a loans institution that can help you bridge the gap between your job loss and your reemployment. Again, this is something to ask a professional for guidance with. Your circumstances may warrant this, or they may not.

Step 7: Make a plan for actionBased on what you have learned in this section, what can you begin to do differently that will help you reduce your money worries (e.g. How will you find a financial planner? When will you create your budget? What seminars can you attend?)?

In the space below, describe your first action planning step (e.g. “On Monday evening, I will set aside time to create my budget. I will ask my partner to help me”).

Step 8: Plan for any obstaclesAn important part of any action plan is anticipating any obstacles that may prevent you from putting your action into place.

For example, you may plan to budget but you don’t know exactly how much money you have or how much money you spend. What do you do then? (e.g. “I will keep a running tab of my expenses each day for two weeks. Then, I’ll review what I have spent. And I will get all of my banking records in one place and look at them”).

In the space below, consider your intended action (from the previous step) and plan for what obstacles might interfere with taking this action and how you will respond to them. The better you plan for an obstacle, the more likely you will be that nothing will interfere with your progress.


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About budgetingYou may be surprised at how much you actually spend to live in the manner to which you are accustomed. For example:

• How much do you spend on a gym membership each month?

• How much do you spend on car insurance premiums each year?

• Do you take vacations? How much do these cost you (including all the money you spend while away)?

• What does your home cost to maintain?

• If you have pets, how much does their care and feeding cost?

• How much do you spend on clothes each month?

• What do you spend on gifts for weddings, birthdays, etc.?

• Do you have monthly car payments?

• How much do you spend each month on revolving credit payments (furniture, appliance loans, etc.)?

Step 1: Prepare

There are many ways to budget (e.g. day-to-day, week-to-week, month-to-month). A monthly budget is usually detailed enough. If you get paid every two weeks it may be easiest to let your budget follow your pay schedule.

Do you have a notebook or somewhere to make your budget notations? Use something small that you can carry with you at all times to make notes in and hold receipts. If you use a software program for your budget, you may still need some way to record the information throughout the day before you transfer it to the program. Do not rely on memory—write down all purchases immediately after you make them.

• Record everything you spend every day for a month. Show the total amount that you paid, including any taxes, andwhether you used cash, debit, or credit card (credit card purchases should be recorded at the time of purchase, not whenthe bill is paid).

• Save receipts from all purchases. If you don’t usually collect receipts, now is the time to start.

• Keep track of the costs to make your purchases (e.g. debit card fees, ATM fees).

Note: If your other/miscellaneous column adds up fast, you may need more categories.



*To calculate your monthly income:

� If you are paid weekly, multiple your net pay (your take-home pay after deductionsand taxes) by 4.333

� If you are paid biweekly, multiply your net pay by 26 then divide by 12

Step 2. Calculate your monthly income

When you calculate your monthly income, include your salary (after taxes and deductions), any commissions or bonuses you receive, child support or alimony payments, interest income, investment income, rental income, student loan income, etc. Don’t count overtime pay, tax refunds, or bonuses as regular income. Instead, consider these to be money you can put towards financial goals (e.g. saving for a holiday). It is always best when budgeting to be conservative and err on the side of having more money left over at the end of a month than you expect.

Salary* (after taxes and other deductions) ...........................................................................................................

Commissions ....................................................................................................................................................................

Contracts ...........................................................................................................................................................................

Child support/alimony .................................................................................................................................................

Interest income ...............................................................................................................................................................

Investment income ........................................................................................................................................................

Rental income ..................................................................................................................................................................

Student loan income .....................................................................................................................................................

Other income ...................................................................................................................................................................

Total Monthly Income ...............................................................................................................................................

Note:

Since this is a month-to-month budget, you may have to estimate the value of your income for a one month period. For example, if you receive quarterly student loan payments, calculate how much this income equates to per month. And if you are going to estimate, be conservative. It’s better to underestimate your income than overestimate it. That way, you are more likely to have money left over at the end of the month.


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Step 3. Start recording

At the beginning of the month, fill in all of the upcoming fixed expenses that you will have to pay (e.g. pre-authorized payments for rent or mortgage, memberships, etc.).

Each day make a note of what you spend. Be accurate. Make another note of which category of expense each transaction belongs to (e.g. housing, transportation). The budget worksheet that follows may be helpful, or create one that works for you.

At the end of the month, add up your expenses for each category, and the grand total for all categories. Include any expenses that have shown up during the month that you had not recorded (e.g. bank statements listing transaction fees).

Step 4. Calculate your monthly expenses

There are two categories of expenses—fixed and variable.

Fixed expenses are expenses you pay month-to-month or year-to-year that remain relatively the same. These include mortgage or rent, phone, utilities, cable, internet, car payments, insurance, loan payments, credit card payments, savings contributions.

Variable expenses are expenses that vary month-to-month. They include food, clothing, transportation, fees and memberships, vacations, gifts and contributions, recreation, pets, spending money and other miscellaneous purchases.


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Sample Budget Worksheet for (month) ________________________Fixed expense Total $ Category*

Rent/mortgage ................................................................................

Utilities ................................................................................................

Childcare expenses .........................................................................

Cable TV/specialty channels/internet ......................................

Condominimum strata fees .........................................................

Alimony ...............................................................................................

Insurance payments:

Car insurance ....................................................................................

Home/tenant insurance ................................................................

Life/disability insurance ................................................................

Medical insurance ...........................................................................

Monthly savings:

RSP/RESP contributions ................................................................

Holiday/events fund .......................................................................

Regular savings ................................................................................

Loan payments:

Student loan ......................................................................................

Credit card ..........................................................................................

Car loan ...............................................................................................

Other ...................................................................................................

* Expense categories

1-Housing

2-Transportation

3-Debt

4-Investments and savings

5-Other expenses/misc.


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Sample Budget Worksheet (continued)Variable Expense Total $ Category*

Car maintenance and repairs ......................................................

Gas/oil ..................................................................................................

Parking ................................................................................................

Public transportation, taxies .......................................................

Dining out/take out ........................................................................

Groceries .............................................................................................

Clothing ..............................................................................................

Dry cleaning ......................................................................................

Babysitting .........................................................................................

Home maintenance/repairs .........................................................

Telephone (including cellular/long distance) .......................

Pets (veterinary bills, pet food, pet insurance) .....................

Personal care .....................................................................................

Other ....................................................................................................

Total Monthly Expenses:

Monthly Budget Summary

Total monthly income:

- (minus) Total monthly expenses:

= Cash remaining

* Expense categories

1-Housing

2-Transportation

3-Debt

4-Investments and savings

5-Other expenses/misc.


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Step 5. Evaluate your budget

Once you have tracked your income and expenses for a month, you can determine if you have a positive cash flow (your income is greater than your expenses) or a negative cash flow (your income is less than your expenses).

To determine if you have a positive or negative cash flow:

Subtract your monthly expenses from your monthly income. If your result is positive, you are spending less than you make and that’s good. If your result is negative, you are spending more than you make.

If you have a negative cash flow each month (on average) you have three choices: increase your income, decrease your expenses, or do both. If you are contributing to investments and savings, but have a negative cash flow, be certain that you are not investing money that should be used to pay off high interest loans (e.g. credit card debt).

Monthly Budget Summary (from your completed budget chart)

Total monthly income:

- Total monthly expenses:

= Cash remaining

Next, compare the percentage of your income that you spend in the various categories (e.g. housing, transportation, debt) to the budget guidelines presented at the beginning of the worksheets. Add up all of the total expenses for each category separately. Use this formula to determine the percentages:

(Total expenditures for category) divided by (Total income for the month) = ______ x 100 = ______%.

Example: $125.00 for transportation divided by $2000.00 income = .0625 x 100 = 6.25%.


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III. Prepare your family

Job loss and transition can have a serious impact on your family.

The good news is that studies show that the better able you are to cope with your job loss and transition, the more likely your family will be to cope with it as well. In other words, if you take steps to cope with your own emotions, your family will benefit and be less likely to suffer distress.

It is also important to point out that studies show that spouses or partners, as well as children, are not necessarily adversely affected by your employment status. This is because you may be spending more time with them than you had before, or you may be expressing your concern for their well-being in more ways than you used to.

Finally, job loss and transition often only exacerbate pre-existing relationship problems. They don’t necessarily create them. Thus, if your relationship is solid and built on a stable foundation of love, respect, and communication, then it will likely serve as a source of support for you, not as a source of distress.

Step 1: Keep the lines of communication openIt’s a good idea to hold regular family gatherings to talk openly about your circumstances and plan for the future.

Here are some tips.

• Talk openly. Explain to your children what to expect, what they should say publicly about the situation, and how they canhelp. Use words they understand, be reassuring, and be specific (e.g. “Daddy’s boss decided to save money and couldn’tpay his salary anymore”).

• Allow everyone a chance to talk about hurts or worries (e.g. “I’m sorry that I’ve been cranky lately but that’s because I’vebeen worried about finding another job” or “I felt bad that I couldn’t buy a dress for my prom because we didn’t haveenough money”).

• Focus on solutions and problem-solving (e.g. “Let’s all think out loud and come up with ideas that will help all of us feelbetter right now”).

Step 2: Help children deal with downward mobilityYour children have to deal with feelings of loss just like you do. They will need to know how this period of transition will affect them, what they can expect, and how they can help.

They may have questions like “can I still go to the prom?” or “if we have to move, will I have to go to a new school?” or “does this mean that I can’t go to college?”.

Some tips:

• Be sure you are taking steps to take care of yourself using the tools from this course. The better adjusted you are, thebetter you can help your family.

• Love and hugs and smiles don’t cost anything. Spend lavishly.

• Be open and honest about the situation. The more information you give your children about your situation and how longit may last, the better they can prepare themselves.

• Create a budget together. Be democratic. Give everyone a voice in planning.


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• Keep the focus on solutions and problem-solving not blaming (e.g. “in our family, we don’t argue with each other orattack each other with hurtful words. We keep our minds on what we can do to help each other and what we can do tomake things better.”).

• Provide reassurance and a sense of security. Children need to know that jobs and money are important, but these thingsdo not have to affect love and family unity. No matter what happens with your economic situation, the family won’t breakapart and your happy times don’t need to change.

Step 3: Prepare your spouse or partnerIf your relationship with your spouse or partner was in conflict before your job loss or transition, then there will probably be even more conflict now. So it may be important to get professional help, such as counselling.

However, even the most solid, conflict-free, relationship can feel the strain of one person’s job loss.

Just as with the rest of your family, keep the lines of communication open and be sure that you reassure your spouse or partner that your love is separate from your economic situation.

Consider the following:

• Let your partner know how they can help you (e.g. offer you smiles and hugs and love).

• Tell your partner how to communicate during this period. For example, you may feel irritated if you are repeatedly asked“how did the job hunt go today?” so let them know (“I’m doing my best but sometimes when you ask me how it’s going itjust reminds me that I’m still out of work”).

• Involve your partner in assisting your job search as much as you are comfortable with.

• Thank them for their support (e.g. “I really appreciate it when you remind me of my talents. Sometimes I forget to tellmyself that. It makes me feel more hopeful about the future.”)

Step 4: Consider family counsellingIf there are family or relationship challenges that are beyond your ability to influence or change, be sure to seek professional help.

Counselling provides a safe, supportive environment where each person can express and release their thoughts and feelings. Once these troublesome emotions and thoughts are out in the open, they are usually soon followed by renewed expressions of love and understanding.

Don’t delay. The longer you put off counselling, the worse things will get and the harder it will be to put them right again.


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IV. Move forwardAs you begin to rebuild your future, you need to prepare yourself for a changing workplace—a workplace where change is the rule, not the exception.

In order to do that you need to become more “change-ready”.

This means: learning continuously, knowing how to manage thoughts and feelings, working well with others and communicating openly, and constantly striving to add value.

The information in this section will help you prepare yourself to move forward. It offers some simple tips and ideas that will help you grow as a person and offer more as a future employee.

There are four skills of being “change-ready.” These are:

1. Learn continuously.

2. Know how to manage thoughts and feelings.

3. Work well with others and communicate to build trust and support, and

4. Constantly strive to add value.

The following sections of the course offer a few simple pointers about these skills of being “change ready.”

The information is adapted from the eLearning course: “Embracing Workplace Change.” If you want more detailed information, consider taking that course.

Step 1: Be a continuous learnerA change-ready person is a continuous learner. Continuous learning means that you:

• Focus on opportunities, rather than what is lost or disappearing (e.g. “I wonder how much better things will be?” ratherthan “I wish things were the way they were before.”).

• Look towards others for answers and recognize that you don’t know everything.

• Remain open to other points of view (e.g. “I don’t necessarily agree with you, but I’m willing to listen to what you have tosay and consider it.”).

• Remain open to facts, regardless of whether or not they fit your wishes or plans (e.g. “I’m going to give this my best effort,even though I wish things were different.”).

• Make mistakes without regret (e.g. “I’m a bit embarrassed to admit this, but I don’t know the best solution to thisproblem...hopefully you can suggest something.”).

• Focus on action, not blame (e.g. “I wonder how I can make this work” rather than “why did you put me on the spot?”).


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Step 2: Manage thoughts and feelingsBeing change-ready also means managing thinking and feelings.

This means being able to remain optimistic and hopeful about the future and stay focused on action rather than be at the whim of how you feel.

Running your life according to action means that you do whatever needs to be done in each moment, regardless of temporary worries or discomfort. It means that you get on with what the situation calls for. And it means that you contribute positively and meaningfully to your life, your relationships, and your work.

Feeling uncertain, or having worries running through your mind, are all common experiences, especially in a changing workplace. Instead of letting your work life be run by your feelings (e.g. “I’m afraid of trying this, so I’ll put it off for another week”) or your thoughts (“I’m worried that I don’t have enough talent for the job”) run your life according to action.

If thoughts or feelings are holding you back, use the coping strategies from earlier sections in this course. And keep focused on taking action. This will put you ahead of the competition and, ultimately, make you a more valuable employee.

Step 3: Work well with othersThe new workplace calls for an attitude of open and honest communication. As well, the new workplace requires that you spend time with colleagues and share thoughts, feelings, and knowledge with them in order to gain their support.

Workplace change is everyone’s experience. The better able you are to work well with others, the better able you will be to extend your employment life. You will be a more valuable employee and have more to contribute to your employer.

If you haven’t been a good communicator at work in the past, consider taking a course or getting some professional help to improve these skills. By challenging yourself to communicate more openly and work well with others, you will be challenging yourself to be more change-ready and, consequently, making yourself that much more attractive as a potential employee.

Step 4: Make yourself indispensableA final key of change-readiness is to make yourself as indispensable as possible to any potential employer. In today’s constantly changing work climate, you can’t always have control over your job security, but you can take steps to ensure that you are constantly adding value to that workplace and, therefore, improving your chances of longer-term employment.

Don’t think of a workplace as a safe haven that provides endless security. Since you are taking this course, you know that this is not the case. Instead, think of the workplace as a place of projects and needs, and yourself as being part of the solution to completing those projects and meeting those needs.

Ask yourself:

• What are my skills and talents worth to an employer?

• As an employee, what value do I add?

• What are my unique strengths and capabilities? How can I put these to use to help a particular employer meet theirparticular needs?


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Learn moreCongratulations on reaching the end of “Taking Control of Job Loss.”

Coping with the emotional impact of job loss and transition is a challenging process and probably one that doesn’t end here. This is because you are not just learning to make sense out of your experience but creating a self-care plan that will give you hope and energy for building a whole new future. So there are other people and other resources and other ideas that may be of help to you.

In th “Learn More” section you will see some of those additional resources. With these kinds of tools and your own internal wisdom about what can help you at this particular stage of your transition, you will be well prepared to embrace whatever life has to offer and well prepared to excel at whatever you choose to do.

Some guidelines for searching the internet for informationThe internet offers a wealth of information, not all of it useful. Be cautious when following advice from an internet resource and be sure to seek professional advice before making any important changes in your own life. Consider the following:

• Who authored the information?

• What is the information and advice based on? (The best information is based on research evidence and studies).

• How current is the information? When was the information last updated?

• Who is funding the site? (Be most wary of advice offered by for-profit commercial ventures that are advertising orpromoting a service).

Finally, do not make important decisions based on internet-delivered information. The internet should only be used as a supplement to professional advice. Consider discussing your findings with a professional and ask them how to best incorporate that information.

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