The Lighter Sideof English

By Dan Wilcox

Speling Madders

Speling Madders

Denise means “Goddess of Wine.”

Speling Madders

Denise means “Goddess of Whine.”

Speling Madders

Denise means “Goddess of Whine.”

He took her for granite.

Speling Madders

Denise means “Goddess of Whine.”

He took her for granite.

Let’s have a mouthful of desert.

Speling Madders

Should Tom Wright decide to

write right rite, then Wright would

write right rite, which Wright

has the right to copyright.

Word and Letter Order

Only only makes so much difference.

Word and Letter Order

Only only makes so much difference.

I only have eyes for you.

Word and Letter Order

Only only makes so much difference.

I only have eyes for you.

Only I have eyes for you.

Word and Letter Order

Only only makes so much difference.

I only have eyes for you.

Only I have eyes for you.

I have eyes for you only.

Word and Letter Order

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh

uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr

the ltteers in a wrod are, olny taht the frist

and lsat ltteres are at the rghit pcleas. Tihs

is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by

ilstef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Regional Differences

Regional Differences

M R DucksM R NotO S A R

C M Wangs?L I B

M R Ducks

Regional Differences

Pennsylvania Dutch

Regional Differences

Pennsylvania Dutch

Lost: A watch by a lady with a cracked face.

Regional Differences

Pennsylvania Dutch

Lost: A watch by a lady with a cracked face.

Throw the baby out the window a kiss.

Regional Differences

Pennsylvania Dutch

Lost: A watch by a lady with a cracked face.

Throw the baby out the window a kiss.

Toss Papa down the stairs his hat.

Regional Differences

It is ineffectual to attempt to

indoctrinate a superannuated

canine with innovative

maneuvers.

Regional Differences

It is ineffectual to attempt to

indoctrinate a superannuated

canine with innovative

maneuvers.

It’s hard to teach an old dog new tricks.

Context in Headlines

Context in Headlines

Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing In Killing

Context in Headlines

Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing In Killing

Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers

Context in Headlines

Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing In Killing

Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers

Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped

Punctuation

PunctuationDear John:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we’re apart. I can be forever happy—will you let me be yours?

Gloria

PunctuationDear John:

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we’re apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be?Yours,Gloria

The End