The Middle Spec - A Seller's Market

7/28/2019 The Middle Spec - A Seller's Market

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THE MIDDLE

"A Seller's Market"

Written by

Jim Monteforte



ACT ONE

FADE IN:

EXT. MONTAGE - DAY

We see shots of hot summer days. People in pools, at thebeach, barbecuing, shots of a bright sun.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Who doesn’t love the summer? In the winter, it’s what we all miss the most... but when it get’s here... we remember about summer’s worstenemy.

We see a hot sun blasting waves of heat.

FRANKIE (V.O.)That. I could swear that sun has aspecial interest in Indiana. It’salways leaning closer to see what’sgoing on over here.

INT. BEDROOM - DAY

FRANKIE HECK is laying in her bed, under the covers, and isas cool as a cucumber.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Luckily for me, I have my greatestally, The Conditionizer 2000.

We hear the air condition break down and shut off.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Oh crap.

From in between the bed and the air conditioner, we see AXL,SUE, and BRICK pop up from the floor into frame.

AXL/SUE/BRICKWHAT HAPPENED!/NO!/AHHHH!

AXLThere better be someone to play forthis. Come on you stupid thing.Work!

Axel in nothing but his boxers, swings a big flailing kick atthe air conditioner. It wafts right passed it, missing it.



AXL (CONT’D)(realization)

It’s probably a good thing I didn’thit it.

SUE

What are we going to do?! Normally, when I can’t take the heat I getout of the kitchen, but this wholetown is a kitchen!

BRICKI think I’m already starting tofeel sweat!

The kids begin loudly complaining simultaneously.

FRANKIEBup bup bup! Listen, you don’t

think I’m upset?(looks over to AC withsadness)

It was my Air Conditionizer.

Frankie fights her sadness and gets out from under thecovers.

FRANKIE (CONT’D)If you think we’re upset, just waituntil your father here’s the news.

FRANKIE (V.O.)

We all have our own things in lifethat help us look forward to cominghome.

CUT TO:

EXT. HECK HOUSE - DAY

We flashback to MIKE arriving home and getting out of histruck. He’s walking up with a miserably stern face.

FRANKIEFor me it’s reality television...but for Mike, it’s that swing ofthe door and the feeling of thecool air from inside the house.

Mike opens the door and a look of happiness and relief is onhis face and he enters.

2.



FRANKIE (V.O.)But this time...

We see Mike arriving home. He walks up, opens the door, andthe look of happiness hits for only a moment when he realizesthere is no cool air. Mike enters in a huff.

MIKEWhat happened!

CUT TO:

INT. FRANKIE AND MIKE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Frankie and Mike are in bed.

MIKEI can’t take this anymore, Frankie.

I can’t live another night likethis.

FRANKIEMike, you haven’t even finished thefirst night.

MIKEI know. That’s my point. We have tofix this.

FRANKIEI ran all the numbers before you

even got home. We have thirteendollars to put towards a new airconditioner.

MIKEHow is that possible?

FRANKIEJump back into reality with therest of your poor family. We onlyeven have the thirteen because Ifound it in Axl’s laundry.

Mike rolls around and moans.

MIKECan’t we just sell something? Likethe kids. Put ‘em all together,that’s gotta equal an airconditioner, right?

3.



FRANKIEAdd a few more kids and maybe.

(thinking)You know.. We do have all thatstuff in the garage... What if wesold that?

MIKEA garage sale? We’ll set everythingup in our driveway just for tenpeople to come?

FRANKIEWell what about the flea market?There’s loads of customers thereand they love junk!

MIKEHmm. Well alright but I don’t know

how the kids will react to it.

FRANKIEYou let me handle the kids. Youjust get to work on getting thatjunk packed up by Saturday.

MIKEYou realize tomorrow is Friday,right?

FRANKIEDo you realize the flea market is

indoors and air conditioned?

MIKE(quickly)

It’s settled. You’ll tell the kidsbefore I get home and we’ll packeverything tomorrow.

The light goes out and she lays down to sleep.

FRANKIE (V.O.)I knew Mike and I had no problem

parting with our junk in the garagebut If I know my kids, they won’tbe as willing.

INT. AXL AND BRICK’S BEDROOM - NEXT DAY

Axl is dialing his phone to make a call and Brick is readingin bed.

4.



BRICKAxl, do you wanna...

Brick is interrupted by Axl who holds up his finger.

AXL

(to Brick)SHH!(on phone)

Sean, my man! What are we doingtonight? It better be awesome andit better be even more awesome thanthat.

SEANSorry, Axl. My parent’s have beenon my case to spend more time withthem before I go off to collegenext month.

AXLWhat? Why? Is that even somethingthey can legally do? You haverights, Sean.

SEANListen, we’ll hang this weekend...oh no. I’m gonna be at mygrandparents. We’ll make it work.I’ll call you soon, man.

AXL

(playing it off)Hey it’s cool. You know. Whatever.

(beat)I’ll talk to you.. In the future Iguess.

Axl hangs up and throws his head back in frustration.

BRICKDo you wanna do something? I hearthere’s a reading of “The Knight ofThe Day” at the library today.

AXL(gets up to leave)

Yeah uhh I’m just going to assumeyou were talking to yourself anddefinitely not me.

Axl exits the bedroom and Brick sighs in disappointment.

5.



INT. - KITCHEN - DAY

Axl passes the kitchen and goes into the living room andplops onto the couch. We see Frankie in the kitchen.

AXL

Mom! We still don’t have an airconditioner!

FRANKIEWorkin’ on it!

FRANKIE (V.O.)I had been putting off talking tothe kids. Honestly, would you wantto deal with them?

The back door opens and Mike enters.

FRANKIE(confused)

Why didn’t you use the front door.

MIKEToo many memories. It’s still toosoon. So what’s going on? Did youtell them?

FRANKIEShh! Not yet. You can’t just swatat a hive.

MIKEOh jeez, Frankie! It’s a band aid.

(yells aloud)Kids! Living room!

Mike begins walking to the living room and Frankie darts infront of him.

FRANKIE(whispering)

Hey listen to me! Do you want a newAC?

Mike hesitantly nods.

FRANKIE (CONT’D)(still whispering)

Right well listen to the mom onthis one. If we’re finally going tolay down the law around here, it’snot going to be when we havesomething to lose.

6.



Mike motions for Frankie to enter the living room. They walkin and the kids are all waiting on the couch.

BRICKWhat’s happening?

SUEAre you two getting a divorce?!

FRANKIESue, no. I’d really wish you’d stopjumping to that conclusion.

(beat)Alright well kids you know howsometimes it hurts to part withthings that you once loved... butyou knew it would be better foreveryone involved in the longhaul...

SUEOh my god!

FRANKIEWe’re not getting a divorce!

MIKEAre you sure? It sounds like it.

FRANKIE(Ignores Mike)

What I'm trying to say is...

Axl interrupts.

AXLUGGHHH BOREDOM!

MIKEYOUR MOTHER AND I WANT TO SELL YOURJUNK IN THE GARAGE FOR A NEW AIRCONDITIONER!

AXL

What?! That's it? Why did you go onand on for that long! Just take ourjunk and gimme an AC!

FRANKIEReally?

BRICKAir conditioner trumps all.

7.



SUEYeah, mom. Were you expecting us tosay no to a new air conditioner?

FRANKIEWow. Alright well if we load

everything in the car tonight, wecan get an early head start fortomorrow.

AXL/SUE/BRICKRight./Sounds good./Wonderful.

CUT TO:

EXT. DRIVEWAY - MORNING

The screen reads “The next morning...” The family is quickly

shoving everything they can into the car.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Hey. We’re not perfect.

INT. CAR - MORNING

The whole family is packed in the car with all their junk andare pulling up to someone waving cars through.

MARKET WORKERHow many tables?

MIKEUh I guess three?

MARKET WORKERSixty dollars.

Mike pays the worker.

MARKET WORKER (CONT’D)Alright so just follow those carsto the outside lot.

FRANKIE(leaning over Mike)

Oh no. We’re here for the indoorstands.

MARKET WORKERIndoor is stores only. Casualsellers are outside in the lot.Please move along.

8.



FRANKIEBut can’t we just..

MARKET WORKER(interrupts)

Please move along.

Mike shakes his head as he drives to the lot.

AXLWonderful, Mom.

FRANKIERelax, just look at it as thecountdown to cold air. Now let’sjust pull up to the tables and takeit all out like we put it all in.

They pull up to where there tables are.

AXLWait. I thought people were justgoing to buy things from the car.You’re telling me I have take itall back out?

FRANKIERight.

AXLIn this heat? What do I get paid?

FRANKIEYou don’t.

(turns to back seat)You get an air condi...

She turns her head to see that Axl has already left.

FRANKIE (V.O.)I should’ve lied to him. Lying isthe best weapon in a parent’sarsenal.

EXT. OUTDOOR FLEA MARKET - MORNING

Everyone gets out of the car and begins unloading. Brick ishaphazardly taking things and having trouble carrying them.

FRANKIECareful with that, Brick.

Brick turns to Frankie, swinging around what he’s carrying.

9.



BRICKWhat?

FRANKIEUhh here let me take that. Go findyour brother. Tell him I said to

come and help and I'll give him acar.

BRICKIs that a lie?

FRANKIEYes.

Brick leaves to find Axl.

FRANKIE (CONT’D)(to Mike and Sue)

The three of us can do this.

SUEI can’t wait to get everything setup! I always considered myself agreat organizer. Where should westart?

Mike walks past with a box of things.

MIKEJust find a table and plop it on.I’ll be in the car with the AC.

EXT. INDOOR FLEA MARKET - DAY

Axl is wandering the flea market and making a phone call.

DARRIN’S VOICEMAILHey. This is Darrin’s voicemail.Don’t start talking until after youhear a beep. I always make thatMis..

Darrin is cut off by is own voicemail and we hear a beep.AXL

Hey, Darrin’s voicemail, you bigdumb jerk, I would much rather betalking to Darrin instead of youbut I guess you’re both a bunch ofBIG DUMB STUPID JERKS! GOD!

Axl hangs up and makes another call.

10.



CASSIDYHello?

AXLHey, Cassidy. How’s life? What areyou doing?

CASSIDYI’m in school, remember? Summerprogram.

AXLRight right. Lame. I bet you’reprobably happy to hear my voice.

CASSIDYWhat do you want, Axl? I need toget to class.

AXLFine. You know what? That’s perfectbecause as it happens, a shortgorgeous hottie is walking up to meas we speak.

Axel hangs up and looks off camera.

AXL (CONT’D)(with attitude)

What are you doing here?

We pan and see Brick.

BRICKMom said, since you ditched thefamily, and since I'm not muchhelp, you have to look after me. I want to see some of the storeshere.

AXLUGH! It just gets worse. I supposeyou want to go find some books tosniff or something equally weird

like reading them?BRICK

Not at all. There’s this cool tentselling picture frames...

AXLUUUGHHHH!!

END OF ACT ONE

11.



ACT TWO

INT. THE HECK’S TABLES - DAY

They are just about all set up and ready for customers. Sue

and Frankie are putting the finishing touches on everything.

SUEOh my god. I’m so excited. I wonderif anyone is going to buy my oldN’sync Lance Bass T-shirt.

Sue holds up a shirt that says “I heart” and a picture ofLance Bass’ face.

SUE (CONT’D)He would be a great catch for anylucky woman. My bff ex-bf Brad

agrees.

FRANKIEUh-huh... So Sue, remember. Thename of the game is selling. Youlet me know if you have anyquestions about being a salesman.

SUEDidn’t you get fired for notselling enough cars?

Frankie remains speechless, unable to think of a response. An

elderly woman approaches them holding an item.

CUSTOMER 1Hi. How much for this vase?

FRANKIEIt’s beautiful, isn’t it? Do you doa lot of gardening?

CUSTOMER 1I try to. Who doesn’t love somelovely flowers every now and again?

FRANKIEI know I do. I always wanted tostart a garden.

We see Mike listening from the car.

12.



FRANKIE (CONT’D)I remember a few years back Ibought some tools and brought them home, they stayed where I left them for three months before I put them in the garage. I think they’re

actually...(Frankie looks around)Yeah. Here they are.

Frankie pulls out a box of gardening tools.

CUSTOMER 1(laughs)

Oh my. How much would it be for allof this?

FRANKIEOh I'll tell you what, Give me

three for the vase and you can takethe rest of the stuff for free.

CUSTOMER 1My aren’t you sweet! Thank you!

The woman pays Frankie and leaves.

SUEWow, Mom, way to go! Our firstsale! Oh! Here comes more people!

People approach Frankie and Sue

CUSTOMER 2I can give you two dollars forthis.

SUESold!

Frankie and Sue exchange money with the customers and smileat each other in excitement. Mike exits the car.

MIKE

Kind of low, don’t you think?FRANKIE

Oh it’s fine, Mike. Don’t worry.

MIKEI’m not worried. I just think youcould aim a little higher.

13.



FRANKIEI think we have this handled, rightSue?

SUE(turns away from customer

towards Frankie)Absolutely!

Another person approaches with a fairly large painting inhand that could be worth something slightly.

FRANKIE(to customer)

Ooh I always liked that frame. Fivedollars?

CUSTOMER 3(shows three dollars)

I have three.

FRANKIEDeal.

The customer hands Frankie the money and leaves. Mike rollshis eyes. Sue walks up to Frankie.

SUEHere, Mom. I got two dollars.

FRANKIE(to Mike)

See? It’s all good.

Frankie takes the money and puts it in her pocket while making a smug face at Mike and then walks over to a customer.

SUE(to Mike)

Somebody really likes baseballcards. They wanted to buy all 200!

MIKEA penny per card?

SUEI know, right!? What a steal!

MIKEThat’s not a good thing.

14.



FRANKIEWe’re working here. How about yougo back to your cold cavern in thecar?

Mike frustratingly leaves. A customer stops by and notices a

teapot. He talks to Sue who is standing by it.

RECURRING CUSTOMERWhat can you tell me about this teapot.

SUEOh. It’s VERY pretty.

The customer stares at Sue, assuming she was going to keeptalking.

RECURRING CUSTOMER

...and?

SUEUhhh... It’s very colorful.

RECURRING CUSTOMERHow old is it?

SUEHmm I’m not really sure. I know wehad it before I was born. Maybeeven my older brother too. So atleast 17 years.

RECURRING CUSTOMERInteresting. Alright thank you.

He leaves without buying anything.

SUE(big smile)

You’re welcome! Have a nice day!

INT. MONTAGE INDOOR FLEA MARKET - DAY

Brick is staring down a wooden frame with full interest.

BRICKDo you notice how the edges stay inpattern the entire way around? Youcan’t tell where it begins and where it ends.

We show Axel looking as bored as can be.

15.



AXLWhen will it end? When will it end?

CUT TO:

We move to another tent and Brick is looking at snow globes.

BRICKYou can never go wrong with a goodsnow globe.

AXLI think you can only go wrong withit. Can we go get something to eat.

BRICKI know just the place.

CUT TO:

We see a man in a food truck hand Axl some weird looking foodfrom an undetermined animal. He grossly carries it over toBrick who is eating his.

AXLWhat is this?

BRICKThe sign said Hachremor. I thoughtit sounded tasty.

(whispers to himself)Hachremor.

AXLBrick, we have got to do somethingabout how you take in the world.

CUT TO:

Back at the frame tent

BRICKYou know, I thought I was done withthese frames but I just had to come

back. The craftmansh..AXL

(interrupts)OH MY GOD! IT’S JUST A PIECE OFCRAPPY WOOD! IT’S SO COMMON, ITGROWS IN THE GROUND ALL OVER!

16.

(MORE)



PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE DONE HERE ANDSUDDENLY HAVE INTEREST IN VIDEOGAMES, OR GIRLS, OR SOMETHINGNOT... THIS!

Axl’s phone goes off and he reaches in his pocket quickly

with anticipation.

AXL (CONT’D)Come on! Come on! Come on!

(looks at phone)Yes! Darrin!

(answers it)You decide to ditch that family ofyour after all and come rescue theaxe man?

Brick shows offense to What axel says.

AXL (CONT’D)Hello?

We overhear Darrin talking to his family mid conversation andthe sounds of his phone rustling. Axl hangs up, disappointed.


Back at the table with Frankie and Mike. Sue is walking backto the table with a corn dog.

MIKE

Well this was a bust.

FRANKIEYou’re not even trying to give me achance. We’ve made fifty dollars sofar!

MIKEFrankie, you had to sell fiftythings to get that!

FRANKIE

You know, you’re just like, Mr.Ehlert. Never letting me do mything. You know, I think if I justhad a shred of respect in mysurroundings, I could be a goodsalesman.

We hear laughing.

17.

AXL (CONT'D)



FRANKIE (CONT’D)God, I can even still here Ehlert’scackling in my head.

MIKEUhh.. Hm.

Mike turns Frankie around to see her old boss Mr. Ehlert. Hehas his own set of tables down the line. We zoom in on hershocked face in slow motion. While we zoom in, Sue is handingher another dollar from a sale.

FRANKIEYou. Have got. To be FREAKINGKIDDING ME!

(clenching dollar inanger.)

EXT. EHLERT’S STAND - DAY

Frankie approaches Ehlert’s stand. His back is to Frankie andhe is talking to a woman who is too young for him sitting ina chair. Frankie clears her throat to get his attention.

MR. EHLERT(turns around)

Frankie! Hello!

FRANKIEHey, Don.

MR. EHLERTWhat bring’s you here?

(stares Frankie down)...You didn't follow me here to begfor your job back, did you?

FRANKIE(rolls her eyes)

No.

MR. EHLERTOh damn. I would’ve liked to see

that.FRANKIE

You can’t be doing too well.There’s a lot of nice things here.Going through hard times?

18.



MR. EHLERTActually the opposite. Thing’s arelooking up! This beautiful gal hereis my fiance, Cheryl.

Cheryl looks up from her phone, gives Frankie an uninterested

smile and looks back down.

FRANKIENice to.. yeah.

MR. EHLERTSo anyway, After my divorcefinalized with the first one I gotpretty lucky. She didn’t really get much. Just the kids. But then... I meant Cynthia.

FRANKIE

Cynthia?

MR. EHLERTMy pending ex-wife. She’s trying totake me for everything I’ve got andshe’s not doing a bad job either.So anything she might be able totake, I'm selling and putting the money in an account for Cheryl.

FRANKIEYou certainly are a romantic.

Sue comes running over.

SUEMom! Check it out! I just sold yourbox of old jewelry for fivedollars!

MR. EHLERTYou’re not selling things are you?You know that was never really yourbag, right?

FRANKIEI’ll have you know we just startedand we’ve already made fiftydollars.

SUEFifty five!

(big smile)

19.



MR. EHLERTDid you have to sell 55 things to make that?

(laughs)

Frankie, offended, goes to respond but is cut off by Sue.

SUE(big smile)

Yep!

FRANKIESue, go back to your dad.

(to Ehlert)It could have been my bag! You justnever found out because I wasalways getting the coffee, or making sure magazines in the lounge were of women with large breasts!

If you just had one shred ofrespect for me!.

(stuttering in anger)I..I..I could've blossomed into.

MR. EHLERT(laughs loudly)

Frankie..(still laughing)

Frankie. Please. Stop(finishes laughing)

You don’t remember yourself on thesales floor? You were always so

nice, making friends with everyone.You had no push. Listen, Frankie.I’m sorry but you were never asalesman. Remember when youconvinced a customer that hecouldn’t afford a car?

Ehlert and Cheryl begin laughing as Frankie becomes visiblyangry

CUT TO:

EXT. THE HECK’S TABLES

Frankie is storming back in a huff and looks right at Mike.

FRANKIE(angry)

Okay. Let’s try it your way.

END OF ACT TWO

20.



ACT THREE


Frankie and Mike are where we left them.

MIKE(excited)

That’s my girl! Alright, you two.Listen up... Haggling is key.

(to Sue)Sue, do you know what haggling is?

SUEHaggling is key!

MIKERight but do you know how it’s

done?

SUE(excited)

Not at all!

MIKEUmm..

(looks to Frankie andfocuses on her)

Alright so, Frankie, you’re gonna want to be firm. Make it seem likeyou’re not willing to budge. That

way, when you do budge, it seemslike a big deal.

FRANKIEI don’t know, Mike.

MIKEDo you want the taste of a sale ornot? Just give it a shot

Mike motions to a couple of customers and Frankie walks overto her.

FRANKIEHello, ma’am! Do you like that wreath?

CUSTOMER 3Yes I do. How much is it?

FRANKIEThat is 25 dollars.

21.



CUSTOMER 3Oh...

She puts down the wreath and walks away. Frankie looks overto Mike.

MIKE(nonchalant)Just push through it. Onto the nextone.

FRANKIE(to other customer)

Hello!

CUSTOMER 4Hi. How much for this clock?

FRANKIE

(stern)That clock is ten dollars.

The customer holds up a five dollar bill.

CUSTOMER 4I got five. I’ll give you five.

FRANKIEDeal.

She takes the money and Mike walks up.

FRANKIE (CONT’D)Ha HA! Did you see that, Mike! Itook him for all he had left.

MIKEThat was one of the oldest tricksin the book. When you want to low-ball someone, you just show them the money. Seller sees the money,they think “Hey, there’s the money.I wanna take that money.” and theperson leaves with a good deal. He

showed you the money.FRANKIE

How am I supposed to know that? Not many people are showing the moneyat a car lot.

22.



MIKEHere just let me take over for abit.

A person approaches them.

CUSTOMER 5Hey. I’ll give you two bucks forthis cassette player.

MIKETwo bucks? That’s considered anantique now. Where else are yougoing to find one of those thesedays?

CUSTOMER 5Probably five out of every ten

tables here... for two bucks.

MIKEFive.

The person shakes his head in disbelief while chuckling tohimself, puts it down, and walks away.

MIKE (CONT’D)(to Frankie)

He’ll be back.

FRANKIE (V.O.)

He didn’t come back. It went that way for awhile. Mike forgets he’snot the really a people person.

INT. INDOOR FLEA MARKET - DAY

Brick is running into another tent and Axl is dragging hisfeet.

BRICKCome on, Axl! There’s a sculpture

with real hair!Brick runs inside and Axl slowly backs away. He beginsbacking up faster and farther away. He stops and yells.

EXT. FLEA MARKET - DAY

Axl has backed up enough where he is outside and far from thebuilding.

23.



AXLAHHHHHH!!!!

(stomping his feet)AHHHHH!!!

REVEREND TIM TOM

Woah, there friend.

Axel turns his head and we reveal Reverend Tim Tom with a big welcoming smile.

REVEREND TIM TOM (CONT’D)Something is clearly troubling you.

AXLReverend Tim Tom? Is the lord inthe flea market or something?

REVEREND TIM TOM

Well yes he is actually, but that’sbecause he’s everywhere, Axl. Nowhow about you tell me what’s gotyou in a flea market on a beautifulsummer weekend screaming your lungsoff?

AXLIt’s my stupid brother.

REVEREND TIM TOMBrick right?

AXLYeah. I’ve been spending the wholeday with him and he just keepsdragging me to all these stupidboring places. To top it all off, I wouldn’t even be here if my stupidfriends weren’t with their stupidfamilies before we go off to stupidlame college.

REVEREND TIM TOM(laughs)

Well that does sound like aproblem... but I don’t think it’squite how you see it.

AXLHow so?

24.



REVEREND TIM TOMWell you say your friends families want to spend time with them beforethey leave for college right?

AXL

Yeah! They don’t even have time tohang anymore and time is windingdown on the summer.

REVEREND TIM TOMExactly. The summer is almost over.The seasons change and maybe it’stime to prepare for that change.Your family are the best people tohave around during this timebecause they’re a constant. Yourfamily’s also going to need helpthrough change. Why do you think

Brick is so anxious to do so manythings with you?

AXLOh.

(beat)So what do I do about my friends?

REVEREND TIM TOMI’ll level with you, Axl. There will be all sorts of differentsorts of friends in your future.Friends you stay in touch with,

friends you don’t, school friends,best friends. Family is family andthey’re always there when they needto be.

AXLWow. I think I really needed tohear that. You should probably turnthat into a song.

REVEREND TIM TOMOh, I assure you. It’s being formed

up here as we speak.(motions to his brain)

AXLSo how about I go grab Brick andbring him over so you can tell him what you just told me.

25.



REVEREND TIM TOMI really think it’ll be bettercoming from you.

AXLOh come on, Tim Tom. You’ve helped

Sue and me. Why not go for Brickand complete the Heck trilogy?

REVEREND TIM TOMI go where I’m needed, Axl, andright now, Brick needs you.

AXLYeah yeah alright.

INT. INDOOR FLEA MARKET - DAY

Axl goes back to the tent where he left Brick and Brick istalking about an item to Axl without realizing he has left.

BRICKWhat’s really cool about this isthat the watch hasn’t worked for 70years. Wow.

AXLUhh yea that is really cool

(to owner)How much is it?

WATCH OWNERThree Bucks?

AXLYeah sure. Here

Axl quickly throws money at the owner and gives the watch toBrick

BRICKWow. Thanks, Axel!

AXLRight. Don’t worry about it. Hey,how about we go grab some food wecan legally?

Brick and Axl leave the tent.

26.



EXT. THE HECK’S TABLES - DAY

Mike is talking to a customer.

MIKEI can’t get any lover than twenty

bucks.

CUSTOMER 6(disbelief)

For a used spaghetti strainer?!

MIKEWhat? You think you can do better?

The customer drops it in frustration and leaves.

MIKE (CONT’D)(to Frankie)

I’m telling you, Frankie, thesepeople just don’t know how tohaggle.

FRANKIEWould you like to teach all of them how to buy things from you?

MIKEAll day you’ve been like this!

FRANKIEOH, ME!? HAVE YOU EVEN SEEN

YOURSELF? You’ve have no problem rolling your eyes and doling outthe wisdom when it comes to being asalesman but it looks to me likeyou’re quite the dud.

Frankie walks over to the other side of the table and acustomer approaches Mike.

CUSTOMER 7Excuse me, is th..

Mike walks away from the customer and up to Frankie.MIKE

If anything screwed up my sellingtechnique, it’s you not backing meup in the first place!

Mike walks off further away from their tables and the samecustomer approaches Frankie.

27.



CUSTOMER 7Is thi..

Frankie walks away from the customer and over to Mike.

FRANKIE

Once again, Mike. Get a mirror orat least listen to the things Isay. We wouldn’t have had to jumpin this so blindly if you had justpacked our junk like I asked!

The customer is still waiting around impatiently whileholding the item.

MIKEWhat do you want me to say? You’rejust bett..

FRANKIE(interrupting)

Do NOT say..(mocking tone)

“You’re just better at that kind ofstuff, Frankie” What does that even mean? I’m better at doing thethings that suck! Doing a jobthat’s more suited for multiplepeople?

We look over at the customer who is looking around. She grabsa few things from the table and runs off. Frankie and Mike

finally notice her as she runs off past Mr. Ehlert who smilesand waves at Frankie.

END OF ACT THREE

28.



ACT FOUR


Frankie and Mike are looking at what was stolen.

FRANKIEI don’t think she got away withanything too great. Just a fewbeanie babies and some silverware.

MIKEOh yeah no big deal. Just fiftybucks.

FRANKIE(puzzled by the number)

Do you know what value means?

We move over to the opposite side of the table where Sue isstraightening up some things. The customer who questioned herabout the tea pot returns.

RECURRING CUSTOMERHi.

SUE(big smile)

Hello again! You’re our firstreturning customer!... Although youtechnically didn’t buy anything

last time. How may I help you?

RECURRING CUSTOMERI was hoping to take another lookat that tea pot. Do you still haveit?

SUE(Looks around)

I think we do. Yes it’s right herein the tea pot section.

RECURRING CUSTOMERThere’s only one.

SUEYeah well still. It’s good to beorganized.

(hands him the tea pot)

29.



RECURRING CUSTOMERUh.. Yes. Thank you. It’s a tadheavy but not too heavy.

(takes a closer look)Minimal chips and scratches.Alright thank you.

He walks away without it again.

SUEUhh goodbye, sir...

A customer approaches Frankie with a candy dish in hand.Before she even gets to speak, Frankie cuts her off.

FRANKIE(sarcastically)

How much for that candy dish, Mike?

MIKE(annoyed)

Frankie, don’t start.

FRANKIENo, Mike. This lady is interestedin the candy dish.

MIKETen dollars!

FRANKIEThree!

MIKEEight!

FRANKIEFour

MIKEFive

FRANKIE/MIKE(turning to customer)

Sold!(staring with anger)

The customer stands in awkwardness and quickly hands them the money and scurries off. Frankie and Mike look at each other with a realization.

30.



FRANKIE (V.O.)At that moment, we both finallyknew how it felt to be a salesmanand we ran with it.

EXT. MONTAGE - DAY TO EVENING

We begin cutting quickly through Frankie and Mike going tocustomer after customer with their arguing routine andcollecting cash. Every time they shout sold, each customer is more and more frightened while handing over cash and hurryingoff. Some flinch, some gasp, but all speechless andthreatened.

INT. BURGER STAND - EVENING

Brick and Axl get their burgers and fries from the stand and

carry it to a table.

AXLNow this was worth the wait. I get what that other place was going forin terms of fast food, but I thinka line is crossed when they rip itoff the animal and hand it to you.

(bites his food)So what’s your deal, Brick? You’vebeen weirder than the usual weirdBrick.

BRICKI don’t know.

AXLYou’ve been hovering around me alot lately. Are you worried about me leaving?

BRICKNo.

(whispers)Yes.

AXLDude. You need to look at it likethis. You know that room we’ve beensharing since you were born?

BRICKYeah?

31.



AXLYeah well imagine how it’ll be whenyou have it all to yourself? Goingto get a lot more roomier.

BRICK

That’s true. I could fit plenty of more books on your side.

AXLExactly! Of course this is for alimited time only because contraryto what Mom and Dad believe, onceI’m out of college, I am divingface first right back home and into my room so don’t get too comfy.

EXT. THE HECK’S TABLES - EVENING

Mike is admiring the nearly empty tables and Frankie iscounting up the money.

MIKEWow, Frankie, It’s just about allgone. We did that.

FRANKIE(finishes counting)

That’s not all we did. Look’s like we have ourselves an airconditioner. Make that an Air

Conditioner plus another twohundred dollars.

MIKEYeah! Way to go us!

Frankie and Mike high five.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Neither of us are good salesman. Ican’t even say together we make agood salesman. What I can say is

that when Mike and I work together, we can make people feel awkward andanxious to leave. I always knewthat but now I know we can make money off of it.

MIKEHey, hows about I take my lady overto the icee stand

32.

(MORE)



(motions to the stand 10feet away)

And then some dinner at the hot doghut to celebrate?

Frankie smiles and looks over to Sue

FRANKIEYou want anything, Sue?

SUECherry Icee, please.

FRANKIEAlright. Keep an eye on everything.

Frankie and Mike leave the tables and walk over to get food.Sue begins taking everything from the surrounding tables and

organizing them on one table. Last on the table is the teapotshe is currently carrying over. Sue puts the teapot down andsees a woman looking at what is left to sell.

CUSTOMER 8Oh my that is a lovely tea pot!

SUEI know isn’t it. There seems to bea lot of interest in this thing.

CUSTOMER 8Oh really? How much is it?

SUEOh I don’t know. My parents shouldprobably help you out with that Icouldn’t..

CUSTOMER 8I’ll give you ten for it.

The recurring customer comes strolling up.

RECURRING CUSTOMER

Hello, I think I'd like to(sees tea pot)What are you doing with that?

CUSTOMER 8I’m buying it for ten dollars.

RECURRING CUSTOMER(to Sue)

I’ll give you twenty.

33.

MIKE (CONT'D)



CUSTOMER 8Twenty five!

RECURRING CUSTOMERFifty dollars!

Customer 7 hangs her head in disappointment, hands over theteapot, and walks away.

SUE(biggest smile of the day)

You, sir, have a deal!

He pays and leaves happily with his teapot. Passing him isBrick and Axl.

AXLWhoa. How much is that?

SUEFifty bucks!

(dances around)Oh yeah!

AXLWhat? Fifty bucks?!

Frankie and Mike come walking back.

MIKEFifty bucks? For what?

(hands Sue her Icee)

SUEOur old teapot. I forced two peoplein a bidding war and it got prettyheated.

FRANKIE/MIKE(cheerful)

Alright, Sue!/NICE!

Sue goes to hand her the money.

FRANKIEHow about you hold onto that.You’ve earned. Especially having toput up with your father and myselfall day.

SUEReally?! AW THANK YOU GUYS!

34.



AXLAw that's insane! I could use fiftybucks!

FRANKIEAnd we could have used your help so

I guess you’re out of luck.

MIKEAlright let’s all get what’s leftin the car.

Everyone picks something up.

MIKE (CONT’D)Actually wait. Put everything down.

Everybody puts everything back on the table.

MIKE (CONT’D)Let’s all watch Axl put what’s leftin the car.

AXLAW COME ON!

MIKEHey you had it coming.

Mike, Sue, and Brick get in the car as Axl begins gatheringeverything together and putting it back in the trunk. Frankielooks down at Ehlert’s table and see’s Ehlert. He’s looking

around

MR. EHLERTHey, Cynthia, sweetheart, have youseen my wallet? I seem to have mispl.. Cynthia?

We hear his car start without him in it. He checks his pocketfor his keys as the van takes off.

MR. EHLERT (CONT’D)No no no Cynthia Cynthia!

She gets away clean and he remains at his stand and looksover at Frankie. She waves with a giant smile on her facebefore she gets in the car and the family leaves.

FRANKIE (V.O.)Who doesn’t love the summer?

END OF SHOW

35.

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The Middle Spec - A Seller's Market

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