The role of gender in regards to parental interactions with children

By: Allison Pyle

Setting:

• Three observations– Italian chain restaurant– Wal-mart– K-mart

• Interviews– Three couples

• Husband and wife couples• Interviewed individually

Italian Restaurant

• Subjects:– Mother– Father– Teenage son– 8-10 yr. old son– 4-6 yr. old son

For the majority of the observation, the mother and the middle son did not interact with the other family members; they were both engaged with an electronic device. The oldest son kept mostly to himself as he read from a bible; however, he engaged in conversations with the father and another group joined them in the restaurant. The youngest son and the father played and communicated frequently.

Wal-mart

• Black Friday morning around 8:30-9:00 am

• Subjects:– Mother– 1-2 year old son– Infant – Grandmother– Grandfather

The young child appeared to be tired and was ready to go home. He repeatedly said that he wanted to go home. The majority of the mother’s reactions to the son’s behavior included purposeful ignoring. Occasionally, she would resort to threats telling the little boy to behave or she would make him go home. The grandmother tried to console the little boy and appeared to play the role of mediator. The grandfather made no purposeful interactions with the other family members, other than to show them things that he found while shopping.

K-Mart

• Black Friday morning around 9:30 am• Subjects

– Mother– 4-6 yr. old girl

While in the toy aisles, the mother was inquisitive, asking the girl several questions about things she might want for Christmas; however, the mother ignored or reprimanded the girl every time the little girl tried to initiate a response regarding a toy she wanted. Behind closed doors, in the bathroom, the mother’s tone of voice was harsh. She used inappropriate language and shouted profanities at the child. The child’s demeanor rarely changed in response to the woman’s communication or actions.

Interviews• 1st couple:

– Man had previous marriage, full grown daughter, and two grandsons

– Present wife had never been previously married, had no children

– Couple adopted two boys (10 and 13) two years ago• Boys’ biological father is deceased, mother is in

prison• Couple had known boys since birth and were

their Godparents.

Couple 1:Unconventional parenting situation:• Stronger relationship

– Honesty – Trust– Comfortable discussing difficult subjects

• Fear of an uncertain future– Drugs/ Alcohol– Peer pressure

Couple 1:

• Father’s activities with boys– Homework– Talking– Teaching about sports: football, basketball, baseball– Fishing, hunting, golfing– Work around the house (chores)

• Mother’s activities with boys– Laughing– Watching sporting events– Watching movies– Baking– Swimming– Mowing grass– Visiting family

Couple 2:• Children:

– Girl, 4 years old– Boy, 2 years old

• Parental stressors– Fear of injury– Financial stress

• Fear of an uncertain future– Showing love, but not spoiling them– Making the right choices now in how they are

raised so they will grow up to be good people

Couple 2:

• Father’s activities with children– Playing games– Wrestling– Hiking in the woods– Reading stories

• Mother’s activities with children– Crafts– Watching movies– Playing outside– Caretaking duties: bathing, feeding, etc.

Couple 3:• Both parents previously married

– Father• Son, 22 years old• Daughter, 16 years old• Daughter, 13 years old (Full custody)• Son, 12 years old• Daughter, 3 years old (not biological, but shares custody 50:50)

– Mother• Daughter, 15 years old• Son, 14 years old

• Parents share no children – Living arrangements

• Mother’s 15 year old daughter• Mother’s 14 year old son• Father’s 13 year old daughter• Father’s 3 year old daughter (every other week)

Couple 3:• Parental stressors

– Children having to deal with peer pressure– Raising teenagers, especially girls– Keeping up with hectic schedules– Financial stress related to raising teenagers

• Fear of an uncertain future– Quality education system– Peer pressure– Drugs

Couple 3:

• Father’s activities with children– Fishing and hunting– Riding 4 wheelers– Video games– Homework– Basketball, football, softball, cheerleading– Playing cards and board games– Water battles– Working in the yard

• Mother’s activities with children– Watching movies– Crafting– Attending sporting events

Conclusions• Gender of parent may be an important factor in

parent-child interactions• Sex of child may be an important factor in physical

interactions as well as parental expectations of child• Other factors such as socioeconomic factors,

societal/cultural influences, marital status/satisfaction, and parental education level may have important impact on parent-child interactions

• Further research (observations, interviews, etc.) need to be conducted to gain a better understanding and make results more generalizable.

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