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The West Desiderata Asylum: Part 1

Date post: 21-Jan-2017
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In Desiderata Valley, a once-loved home had been gutted and repurposed for

eight new residents, seven of which are known to have atypical lifestyles…

Yes! I’m playing an asylum challenge! I’ve started a few over the years, but never

finished, and it was about time I tried again.

And why the “West” Desiderata asylum, I hear you ask? Well, it’s merely the

family’s name. The residents of the asylum don’t have last names, they all share

“West”.

Let’s meet these residents…and it’s probably worth noting I was ill when I made

them…

Here is Beadee!

I originally intended Beadee to be a Grilled Cheese sim, but apparently couldn’t be

bothered to mess around with the aspiration reward to make him so. So he’s a

Fortune sim instead.

Who knows why he was institutionalized? Probably something to do with the fact

he’s happy all the time.

Beadee randomised as gay.

Next up, we have Rah Rah, the angry pink gorilla dude! Every asylum needs one,

right?

He’s a Knowledge sim, and his eyebrows make him look permanently furious. He

was probably institutionalized for looking so angry, regardless of whether or not he

has an anger problem.

Rah Rah randomised as straight.

Next up, we have Hula Girl #2!

Hula is a Popularity sim, and was sent to Desiderata after a meltdown about never

being Death’s number one gal. Well, she’s probably nowhere near that number

one spot now.

Hula Girl #2 randomised as straight.

And here we have adorable pirate, Norman!

Captain Norman is a Fortune sim, because who doesn’t love treasure and gold

and shiny things? Unfortunately, Norman is a broke pirate, and the pressures and

depression of being a broke pirate have tipped him over the edge.

Norman randomised as straight.

Next, we have party-hard DeeJay!

DeeJay is a Romance sim, and apparently has only just discovered it’s no longer

the early noughties and her outfit is no longer cool (if it ever really was). The

shock was a bit too much for her system, and so she’s had to check into the

Desiderata asylum.

DeeJay randomised as straight.

This happy-go-lucky lady is Clowna!

Clowna’s a Family sim, who had to leave her job as a Tragic Clown for being too

pleasant and peppy. She was sent to Desiderata by her bosses for being ‘too

happy’.

Clowna randomised as straight.

And our final resident is Clank!

Clank is a Pleasure sim, who became over occupied with his work, and now

refuses to remove his scuba gear. He’s in Desiderata to try and break his

obsession with deep sea diving.

Clank also randomised as straight, which means the only gay person in the facility

is Beadee.

So who’s in charge of these people?

“Am I…surrounded by idiots?”

It’s my simself! Doesn’t she look thrilled to be here?

Sam is a Pleasure sim, with a personality of 4/4/4/7/6 (Aquarius). And the LTW

that’ll get everyone out of here?

To become a Game Designer! I’m not sure how difficult that’ll be, but I’ll give it my

best shot!

Let’s get started!

And they’re off!

Right out of the gate, Norman and Clowna realise they’re attracted to each other.

Quick, right?

It’s probably worth noting that I have ACR installed, and also Larger Households

hack. They’re in my game anyway usually, and I don’t really see them as an

advantage.

I expect some unplanned pregnancies by the end of this.

Man, they’re really moving quickly – I didn’t expect any relationships this early on!

Everyone else, however, was content to chuck footballs around.

Although in England, we wouldn’t call those footballs. They’re actually closer to

rugby balls, I think. You get the idea.

Catch didn’t last long, and ACR was soon demanding attention again.

This time, it’s DeeJay and Clank. And romance means having a weird neck,

apparently.

With all the romancing taking place on the lawn, Beadee slips inside and grabs

the guitar.

I’m guessing Beadee’s going to be feeling pretty lonely by the end of this

challenge, bless him.

Sam, meanwhile, set about making friends. She’ll need 9 of them to top the

career.

“We were in love in an old challenge, how about we be friends in this one?”

“Depends. Will you be joining the garden club?”

“Can’t say I will be.”

It may be slightly cheating, but I looked up what I needed to top the Gamer career

on the wiki. 10 logic points, 8 mechanical points, 7 creativity points and 9 friends.

Seems sort of do-able, right?

I bet a scuba diver on a dance sphere is something you never knew you needed

in your life.

You’re welcome.

“RAH! RAH RAH!”

It doesn’t take much to make Rah Rah look furious, those eyebrows are intense!

I randomised all the personalities, so I have no idea how many nice points he has

– I wonder if we’ll be seeing this face a lot!

The Welcome Wagon included a bunch of playables from Desiderata, including

Victor Aspir here. They’re not that thrilled by an asylum for neighbours.

“Ugh, he’s glitching through his scuba helmet!!”

Don’t be such a prude, Victor, jeez.

“How am I ever going to gain skill points in this mad house?”

Also, gorilla butt. Just saying. I was flicking back through the screenshots, and

couldn’t not notice it.

“Phew, men in monkey suits make my heart flutter!”

And DeeJay photobombing from the bath tub.

“Hey there, Hula lady! You look like a mirage I saw once, at sea!”

“You’re kidding me, right?”

“Why would I lie to such a pretty face?”

“Maybe…you are a pirate, afterall.”

“So what happened with the hula girl?”

“Eh, apparently she doesn’t appreciate me ‘using lines’ on her. Whatever that

means.”

“So we’re going to woohoo now as a consolation prize?”

“I guess.”

“Well, I’m in.”

“Hooray!”

Elsewhere, DeeJay was entertaining herself.

“Look how high I can jump!”

And look how seriously short that skirt is.

Hula Girl #2 was also keeping herself occupied, after turning down Norman’s

advances.

“Who needs a pirate when you have a dance sphere?”

Beadee eventually had to take a break from playing the guitar, which is pretty

much all he did that first day, and Rah Rah quickly snatched it up.

Clowna’s obviously very into clumsy gorilla music.

She did get bored of Rah Rah, and eventually snuck back into the double with

Norman, just to be adorable.

Let’s see how long this relationship lasts, shall we?

“Rah! Rah Rah Rah! Rah Rah Rah?”

“You know what, I completely agree. They should still give prizes away with

cereal.”

Clank was the unlucky one who ended up sleeping on the sofa that night.

But, judging from his costume, he’s used to being uncomfortable, so it’s not too

much of an issue. Maybe.

With morning comes a stolen kiss. Apparently pirates don’t do it for Hula Girl #2,

but gorilla men do.

Even when they’re currently missing their suits.

“Hula! My lady, how is your morning going?”

As revenge for taking his back-up lady, Norman then kept Hula Girl talking in front

of the toilet stall, trapping Rah Rah for hours.

Pirates, right?

Elsewhere, a couple were starting the day with a morning woohoo, and proving

they were pretty much only interested in each other.

Clank and DeeJay decided to make the most of the other couples being

preoccupied.

If only there was a memory for woohoo in an asylum, right?

“Hey, Hula, did I mention you look hot today?”

Poor Beadee getting less attention because he’s just so drama-free, bless him.

Photobomb all you want, Beadee.

“Honey, I’m home! And I got a promotion!”

We’re on our way

You’d think someone with the name DeeJay would have a natural affinity for

music, but apparently that’s not the case.

At least she’s enjoying herself. I think. That expression is kinda hard to read.

“You know what this asylum needs? More babies.”

“I totally agree!”

They were unsuccessful this time, but I don’t think it’ll be much longer.

Ever seen a scuba diver chucked out of a dance sphere? I bet it’s everything you

never knew you wanted.

You’re welcome. Again.

Once again, Beadee has stolen the guitar and started providing entertainment for

the asylum.

“DeeJay! You’re out of time! Dance properly!”

He’s really into his art form.

“So that was fun.”

Eesh. We’re never getting out of here, are we?

“Oh HELL NO. Norman doesn’t share!”

I wondered how long it would be until something like this happened.

“How could you cheat on me with a gorilla?!”

“He understands me!”

“He doesn’t speak! He just makes noises!!”

Norman then went for an angry make out session with Hula Girl #2.

Because, dammit, if a pink gorilla was going to steal his girl, then he was going to

get revenge.

“We’re so nice and happy.”

“Truly, we are blessed.”

Well, I’m glad someone is in this crazy little house.

Well, that’s about it for this time – but don’t worry, you can have more asylum

antics soon!

See you next time for romance, drama, guitar playing, crazy costumes and maybe

even a promotion or two!


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