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AOHT Delivering Great Customer Service

Lesson 8Effective Professional Writing

Student Resources

Resource Description

Student Resource 8.1 Reading: Customer Complaint Email and Response

Student Resource 8.2 Reading: The Effective Business Email

Student Resource 8.3 Scenarios: Writing a Complaint Email

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AOHT Delivering Great Customer ServiceLesson 8 Effective Professional Writing

Student Resource 8.1

Reading: Customer Complaint Email and ResponseDirections: Read the customer complaint email and response.

Customer Complaint EmailTo: [email protected]

From: Alyssa Tan

Subject: Bad experiences on recent stay

Date: March 8, 2015

----

Dear Customer Relations Director:

I recently spent a week at the Heavenly Resort and Spa. I enjoyed most of my stay, but I also had some major problems and I think you should know about them. I informed several employees of these problems during my stay, but got very little response. If I am not confident that these issues are being addressed, I will not be returning to your resort and I will suggest that my friends find other places to stay as well.

First of all, when I arrived at the hotel, I slipped and nearly fell because of puddles of water on the floor. I noticed that one of your pools is near the lobby and some guests had walked through the lobby after swimming.

Then I had to wait at least 10 minutes before the front desk clerk returned to check me in. When he arrived, he asked for my credit card, without even greeting me or apologizing for the wait. He did not offer to show me to my room or even give me a map of the resort. I had to ask a bell person to guide me in the right direction and to help me with my luggage.

On my third night, I was awakened at 4:30 a.m. by a wrong number wake-up call. The woman apologized, but didn’t sound very sorry about it. I put the “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door and went back to sleep. At 9:30 a.m., I was awakened by a housekeeper who wanted to clean the room. I pointed out the sign and she left, but I decided I might as well get up and get on with my day. When I got back to the room at 6 p.m., the bed was unmade and the room still had not been cleaned.

I tried to complain to the manager, but no one could locate him. I told my story to the desk clerk and she assured me that she would tell the manager. The next day, I received a call from the manager apologizing for “my experiences.” That’s it—nothing more specific than that. I did not find it satisfactory, but wasn’t sure how else to bring these complaints to someone’s attention, so I decided to write this email once I returned home.

Again, I hope you can address these issues and guarantee that I would have a better experience next time.

Sincerely,

Alyssa Tan

Response from the Resort


mailto:[email protected]


To: Alyssa Tan

From: [email protected]

Subject: Your complaint email

Date: March 9, 2015

----

Dear Ms. Tan:

We truly make every effort to make every guest’s stay a “heavenly” one. I’m sorry to hear about your less-than-heavenly experiences.

I assure you that I have addressed the isues you described with the appropriate employees. I would also like to inform you that one of those people is no longer employed at the Heavenly Resort and Spa. Moreover, you’ll be happy to know that our wake-up call system is currently being updated to reduce the risk of an error like the one you experienced during your stay. the housekeeping staff has just been retrained. We have reinforced the requirement that they check the doorknob for “do not diturb” signs as well as the rule that they must return for a second round of cleaning in the afternoon. And finally, we are working on reconstruction of the pool area located near the lobby, the new layout will redirect guests around the lobby to a side door, which will prevent the pudles in the lobby that you had experienced.

I appresiate the time you took to write to me and air your complaints. I sincerely hope you will choose to stay with us again!!!

Wishing you a heavenly day,

Sarah MolinoCustomer Relations DirectorHeavenly Resort and Spa


mailto:[email protected]



Reading: The Effective Business Email

This presentation covers the following topics:

• Why email is a useful medium for communication

• When not to use email

• The basic rules of email etiquette



Email is one of the most commonly used methods of business communication. Research has shown that most employees spend at least two hours each day on email.

Some of the advantages of email:

• It is quick and easy. Tracking down someone by phone or in person could take you hours; sending an email takes minutes.

• It allows you to communicate with many people simultaneously. Companies can send out marketing emails to thousands of customers at once, and a manager can deliver information to her entire team at once.

• It leaves a trail so the history of a conversation can be tracked. Sometimes, we need to revisit a discussion. Unless a phone call is recorded, it’s not possible to do this by phone or in person. Email lets you go back to the information hours, days, or even months later.

• It can be used 24 hours a day regardless of where the recipient is. For example, if your customer is in Japan and you are in New York, you can email them at any time of day without having to worry about what time it is there and whether or not they are available.

• It is efficient. Unlike phone and face-to-face discussions, small talk is not necessary; in fact, it’s not good etiquette to include unnecessary information, like small talk, in a business email.



There are disadvantages to using email:

• Email is not private. The recipient can easily forward your email to anyone. Not only that, but email may sit in somebody’s inbox, or even trash, for years for anybody to read. For confidential, private discussions, it’s best to use the phone or talk face to face.

• Once you’ve sent an email, it’s out of your control. If you send an angry email, you might regret what you said once you’ve cooled off, but there’s nothing you can do to take it back.

• Email is usually not appropriate for really big news—negative or positive. For example, imagine getting an email that says the president of the company just resigned. Or the company was bought out by a larger company. Or even that you are getting a promotion. Some news is so important that it requires a live person to deliver it, so the recipients can interact, ask questions, and so on.

• If a matter is urgent, don’t use email. You can’t expect everyone to check email throughout the day, every day—particularly if they are traveling, or if they do not have a full-time job that requires them to be at a computer most of the day. If the matter is urgent, make a phone call or find the person to discuss the matter.

• Sometimes emails don’t get read. They end up getting caught in a spam filter or accidentally deleted, and your information never reaches the recipient.

• Just like big news, sensitive matters need a personal touch. If an issue with a customer or an employee requires prompt, sensitive action, use the phone or find the person for a face-to-face discussion.



It is said that the French King Louis XIV’s gardener put up signs, or étiquets, to keep members of the nobility from walking on the grass. Nowadays, the word etiquette means the set of manners that are appropriate for a certain situation. There’s etiquette for dining, socializing, letter writing, email writing, and much more.

Etiquette is based on the situation you are in; business etiquette is different from appropriate behavior in your personal life. Think about it this way: you wouldn’t dress or talk or behave on a first date the way you would dress, talk, or behave when you’re just hanging out at home with your family. In the same way, how you write an email to your friends or family is not how you would write an email to your boss.



Your personal email account is for everything you do outside of your job, like sending photos to friends, shopping online, making appointments, or contacting potential employers.

Even though it’s personal, think about what your email address says about you. If a potential internship provider gets an email from [email protected] or [email protected], it may not get read at all. It’s not professional. Pick something that won’t embarrass you or make a bad impression on the recipient, no matter who it might be.

Don’t answer personal emails when you’re at work. You can answer them from a personal device like a smartphone when you’re on break or at lunch. That goes for texting as well as checking Facebook and any other social networking sites.

Don’t use your work computer to check personal email.



Many employers will have you sign a contract stating your acceptance of their right to monitor your email activity at work. This is especially true if you have an email address for your job. Usually this address will be a combination of your first initial, last name, and the company’s domain name.

Commonsense rules that you should always follow: don’t forward emails with jokes or pictures that could be considered sexist, racist, homophobic, or biased. This kind of email doesn’t belong at work and it can get you fired. Read every work email carefully. Notice the style of the emails. They are likely to be more formal than one you’d write to your sister, but there’s a huge range. How do people at work address each other in the beginning of the email? How do they sign them?

Since your emails represent your company, comply with all policies your company has about using email. Some companies have a response time policy that requires employees to respond to requests from customers within a specific timeframe, such as “Respond within 24 hours during regular business hours.”



The subject line is the first thing the recipient reads. A lot of people decide whether or not to open an email based on the subject line. So it’s very important to make it good! It should tell the reader what the email is about and set the tone—positive, negative, or neutral. A one-word subject line is usually too short; a good subject line is less than 50 characters long, which is about five or six words.

Sometimes an email turns into a long email thread, with many replies. Eventually the original subject line no longer captures what the emails are about. When this happens, start a new email with a new subject line.



Your greeting tells the recipient how formal your email is and creates rapport. Remember, an email can’t convey nonverbal cues. So the words you choose are even more important. A greeting is one of the few ways you can convey “tone” through your email. It’s not okay to skip a greeting in most business emails. An exception to this rule is this: when you are emailing back and forth in an ongoing conversation with somebody you know well, then it’s okay to skip a greeting after your first reply.



Acronyms and emoticons are informal ways to express feeling and emotion through email. They can be very useful. However, they are informal and should not be used in most business communication. And when you do use them in informal emails, be sure you only use ones that are most commonly used and understood. Here are some examples:

FYI = for your information

FAQ = frequently asked question

BTW = by the way

IMO (or IMHO) = in my (humble) opinion

AKA = also known as

:-) is a smile

J is also a smile

:-( is a frown



Don’t use all capitals in emails. It is bad nonverbal email communication. Even doing this for one word can be offensive. Instead, choose language that highlights or emphasizes a point, such as “very,” “especially,” and “particularly.”



Respect your reader’s time and don’t write a book! On the other hand, don’t write so little that you don’t make your point or sound rude. Here are some rules of thumb:

• Provide enough information to make your main point clear, but not too much so it gets lost in the details.

• If the email includes a lot of information, include an “executive summary” at the start which alerts the reader about what information is included.

• Instead of repeating information from a previous email, refer the reader to the previous email; summarize if necessary.

• Try to keep emails to 25 lines or shorter; if you’re writing more than this, consider attaching a document with the extra information.



Research has shown that many people don’t read past the first paragraph, so make it a good one! This is where you tell the reader why you are writing to him or her. Start with an introductory sentence that sets a pleasant tone and provides context.



In your attempt to be formal and business-like, don’t sound cold or unfriendly. Choose friendly and pleasant words, but don’t joke around. Not only can jokes be considered too informal or unprofessional, but they can be offensive to some people. Don’t try to be cute and funny, just be nice!



Bad grammar, poor spelling, and overused punctuation create a negative impression on the reader. These kinds of flaws also take away from the message you’re trying to convey. Read, re-read, and, if possible, even have somebody else read an email before it is sent. And always use spell-check!

After using spell check, double check your email. Sometimes the spell-check feature changes the spelling of a word to make it a different word altogether. This is especially common if you are typing on a smartphone or tablet with an “autocorrect” feature. In this case the recipient of your email will be confused, and the email can reflect in a negative light on you.



End your email on the same note you started it. This will leave the reader in a positive frame of mind. In very informal emails, it’s okay to skip a closing and just write your name. However, this should not be done in most business communications.

If the email is to a client, sign it formally with your first and last name and your title. Also include your phone number at work (not your home number) so that there is more than one way to reach you.



Consider the rules of business etiquette you just learned. How does this email follow, or not follow, those rules? Here’s an abbreviated list to reference:

• Clear subject line

• Appropriate greeting

• Avoid acronyms and emoticons

• Don’t use all caps

• Clear, concise sentences and paragraphs

• Opening provides context

• Friendly and cordial, no joking

• Proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation

• Appropriate closing




Scenarios: Writing a Complaint EmailDirections: Write a complaint email, using some of the guidelines for effective business writing that you have learned in this lesson. Use one of the scenarios below to help you get started, write about a personal experience of bad customer service, or make one up! Just make sure your complaint is about a hospitality or tourism business, and keep your complaints realistic.

Scenarios A married couple stayed at a hotel last week when they were in town to attend a family wedding.

The rooms were very small and did not look anything like the photos and description on the hotel website. The couple checked in late at night and was very tired. But when they got to their room, the toilet didn’t work. The front desk transferred them to a new room, but the couple had to wait in the lobby with all their stuff for an hour while the front desk staff helped a tour group get checked in. While this hotel offers good prices, the customer service leaves a lot to be desired.

A person who does a lot of traveling for business needs to take an airport shuttle to get home after a long trip. The shuttle driver did not seem to know the area very well. There were only three guests on the shuttle—the businessperson and an elderly couple. The businessperson lives about a half hour from the airport, while the couple lived all the way on the other side of town—at least an hour and a half drive at that time of day. But instead of dropping the businessperson off first, the driver insisted on taking the other couple home. When the businessperson complained about the delay, the driver blamed the other passengers and said they insisted on being taken home first, but the other passengers said that wasn’t true. When the driver finally was ready to take the businessperson home, the driver managed to get lost. When the businessperson tried to give the driver directions, the driver ignored the businessperson entirely. So although the businessperson’s flight landed at 4 p.m., the shuttle didn’t get the businessperson home until after 8 p.m.!

A group of friends was having a “Girls Getaway Weekend” and booked a tour with a local tour company. They were told the driver would meet them in the hotel lobby at 8:15 a.m. However, at 7:45 a.m., they got a call in their hotel room. The driver was downstairs, claimed to have been waiting 15 minutes already and told them if they weren’t downstairs in five minutes, he was leaving and the friends would not get a refund. The friends had to hurry downstairs to meet the driver. When they got to the company offices, there was a reservation problem. While all four friends were listed in the reservation system, three of them hadn’t been assigned to a specific tour because of a problem with the online booking system. As a result, the tour had been overbooked and there were now no more seats available. The office manager offered the friends tickets for another day, but it was the last day of their trip. The manager did refund part of their money and gave them tickets for another, shorter tour, but the friends were still very disappointed to have missed out on the tour they had booked because of a glitch in the online booking system.

A family with two kids decided to rent bikes and take a tour of the city. The family booked bikes on the bike tour company’s website and paid in advance, but when they got to the office, the bikes weren’t ready. The family had requested a tandem bike so the two kids could ride together, and that bike had a flat tire. The employees couldn’t fix it and had to bring one over from another location, which meant the family had to wait at the store for almost 45 minutes. The family ended up trying five different bikes, none of which were well-maintained or even safe to ride. After all this, the family decided not to rent bikes from the business, but the girl working at the register refused to give them a refund. She claimed that only the business owners could authorize refunds, and she gave the family the business owner’s email address.


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