Welcome toTools and Techniques
for Managing and Resolving Conflict
Amanda MurphyProject and Research Specialist,
The William D. Ruckelshaus CenterExtension Faculty, Washington State University
Phone: (206) 219-2409E-mail:[email protected]
Mission
• Neutral resource for collaborative problem solving
• Expertise that improves the availability and quality of voluntary collaborative approaches.
• Help public, private, tribal, non-profit and other community leaders work together, build consensus and resolve public policy conflicts.• Advance teaching and
research missions of the two universities by bringing real-world policy issues to the academic setting.
Services• Neutral Forum• Situation Assessment• Facilitation, Mediation, Conflict
Resolution• Project Management, Strategic
Planning• Applied Research • Information Portal• Training• Policy Discussions
Webinar Series
Session 1: Understanding and Responding to Conflict - July 18, 2012 Session 2: Effective Communication: The basis of conflict resolution - July 25, 2012
Session 3: A Framework for Problem Solving - August 1, 2012
Where are you located?
What department/area do you work in?
What’s one thing you hope to learn from this session?
Session 1 Objectives
• Define Conflict
• Introduce Types of Conflict
• Introduce Conflict Styles
• Introduce Skills for Responding to Conflict and De-Escalating Emotions
What words come to mind when you think of the word “Conflict”?
What is Conflict?
Definition: A conflict occurs when two or more parties perceive that they have mutually incompatible values, priorities or goals.
Conflict Characteristics• Normal, inherently neither good nor bad
• Can be stressful and unpleasant
• Is a process, rather than a moment in time
• Rarely just about the content
• Does not have to result in winners and losers
• An opportunity for positive change
In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. – Albert Einstein
Steps to Resolving Conflict
1. Understand the Conflict
2. Create a Positive Atmosphere
3. Develop a Mutual Understanding
4. Problem Solve
Causes of Conflict
Adapted from:Christopher Moore, The Mediation Process, Third Edition (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass), 2003.
Approaches to Conflict
Avoid
When this style is appropriate:•Issue is trivial•Cooling off period is needed•Timing is wrong
When this style is not appropriate:•Issue is important and conflict will not disappear, but instead continue to get worse
Accommodate
When this style is appropriate:•Maintaining the relationship more important•Issue is very important to the other person and not to you
When this style is not appropriate:•Issue is important to you•Lead to evading the issue when others are ready to address it
Compete
When this style is appropriate:•A decision needs to be made quickly•Agreed upon that power comes with position of authority•Unpopular decision needs to be madeWhen this style is not appropriate:•Losers are powerless to express themselves•Feelings are sensitive•Decision is not urgent
Compromise
When this style is appropriate:•A decision needs to be made sooner rather than later•Both parties are better off than attempting a win/loseWhen this style is not appropriate:•Situation is urgent•Unbalanced power•Many important needs must be met
Collaborate
When this style is appropriate:•An important decision must be made•Situation is not urgent•Previous resolution attempts have failed
When this style is not appropriate:•The matter is trivial to all involved•Time, commitment and ability are not present
Which of the styles best describes the way you dealt with conflict?
What were the results of your chosen style?
Is there another style you would prefer to have used?
Why?
Competing•Low relationship•High Issue
•Win/lose power struggle
Avoiding•Low relationship•Low Issue
•Withdraw from the situation
•Maintain neutrality
Collaborating•High relationship•High Issue
•Expand range of possible options•Goal is win/win
Accommodating•High relationship•Low Issue
•Give in to other party•Maintain harmony
Compromising•Relationship undamaged•Goal is to find “middle
ground”
ASSE
RTIV
ENES
S
COOPERATIVENESSAdapted from Kenneth Thomas & Ralph Kilmann, 1974.
Conflict Approaches
Responding to Conflict
Video.
Think of a recent conflict. What emotion(s) did you feel?
In what part of your body do you experience these emotions?
What effect do emotions have on the outcome of a conflict?
Our Brain’s Response to Stress
Fight, Flight or Freeze ?Nature has designed us to react to
'danger signals' faster than conscious thought.
What Does an Emotional Person Want?
• To Vent• To Be Heard • To Be Understood• To Feel Cared About
De-Escalating Skills
CA2RE
• Control Yourself
• Attend
• Acknowledge
• Reflect
• Explore
Control Yourself
Before you can de-escalate someone else, you must first de-escalate yourself.
•Observe the Situation•Observe Your Own Reaction•Slow and Depend Your Breathing•Relax Your Muscles•Get Space or Assistance
TIP:Simply Admitting to
Yourself That You Are Becoming Emotional Is the Biggest Step to De-
Escalating Yourself.
Attend
• Listen and Wait to Respond
• Let Them Vent
• Don’t Try to Tone Them Down
• Suspend Judgment
• Listen for Content and Feeling
• Open, Inviting Posture
• Verbal Acknowledgments
• Eye Contact (this is culture specific)
• Relax, Slow Breathing, Decrease Voice Volume
• Empathize and Validate• Apologize As Appropriate• Assure of Your Intent
Acknowledge
Reflect
• Reflect (What You Heard) Back Content and Feeling• “Let me check with you if I’m following. You
feel (state feeling) because (state content)…
Explore
• Explore and Clarify What You Didn’t Hear
• “I’m not clear on that: can you say more about that?”
• “So the main concern you have is…?• Keep Focused on the Issue
Summary and Close
Steps to Resolving Conflict:1.Understand the Conflict• Analyze the conflict situation – what is the
cause?• Identify the appropriate conflict resolution
style.2.Create A Positive Atmosphere• CA2RE – neutralize your emotions and the
other person’s emotions
Next Sessions
Steps to Resolving Conflict:
3. Develop a Mutual Understanding• Using communication skills to gain
information and understanding.
4. Problem Solve• Using the problem solving framework.
