Official Newsletter of

The Combined Probus Club of Murray District (Inc.)

Western Australia

Murray

Magpie October 2013

President: Brian Sydney-Smith 9537 8847

Vice-President:

Past President: Fran Snabel 9537 7461

Secretary: Shirley Boyd 9537 7066

Treasurer: Brian Martin 9531 2351

Membership: Joan Timperley 9535 5291

Registrations: Jenny Armstrong 9537 7359

Programs: Christine Norman 9537 6543

Activities: Fran Snabel 9537 7461

Interclub Liaisons: Elizabeth Ford 9537 6979

Assets: Adri Weggen 9537 7708

Historian: Tom Hoffman 9537 6526

Behind the Scenes VIPs

Book Club: Lloyd Bevis

Newsletter Editor: Sandy Bartle

Refreshments: Janice Rinaldi

Website: http://murrayprobus.net

Printing courtesy of the office of Murray Cowper MLA

The October General Meeting was held at the

Ravenswood Hotel on Tuesday 8th

October 2013.

There were 41 members present and two new members were inducted into the club.

Minutes of this meeting have been circulated to all members.

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Guest Speaker

The guest speaker this month was

Len Rathbone who gave us a very entertaining talk on the

perks and benefits of the Seniors Card and gave all members

present a “show bag” of goodies

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY

October

John Aylmore

John Dickson

Margaret Gallin

Margaret Glass

Yvonne Hill-Warner

Coral Woodhead

Milestones

Congratulations to

Elizabeth Ford – 80

New member Jim Griffin - 90

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President’s Chat October 2013

We are now in November and Summer has finally arrived with a vengeance - the worst hayfever season for years I'm told.

Everyone is out tending their gardens and making sure the retic works. Gill has been out weeding, getting ready for the Welcome Back Party at lunchtime on Sunday. However only Fran and Margaret are back - the rest are still having a wonderful time over East. It was really great that we had nine members attending the Albury Wodonga Conference and we look forward to hearing their reports in due course.

Unfortunately Val Green has had to resign from the Club for health reasons, which has necessitated looking for a new Vice President. We are delighted that Ann Bevis has stepped into the void. She has been co-secretary for two years and knows the ropes well so I have no doubt that Ann will make an extremely active and able President for the coming year. Thank you, Ann, for coming to the rescue. As you all know, our Club is hosting the South West Get Together on 14 November. Sandy and her committee have been extremely busy organising the venue and activities for the many Probians who will descend on Pinjarra for the event. We wish Sandy every success and, more than that, trust that all our members will pitch in to help where needed.

Our membership has remained steady with the introduction of new members equalling the resignations received. Lately however numbers in attendance have been reduced due to the "Grey Nomad" exodus in the colder months and others going on overseas holidays. We just hope that no-one has been caught up in the terrible storms which have hit UK and Europe this week or in the dreadful bushfires in NSW.

See you all sometime in November - it's going to be a really busy month.

Brian J Sydney-Smith

Medical myth #3

To keep your “system” healthy you need to drink 8 glasses of water a day.

No one is sure where this originated, perhaps in an old recommendation that you need 1ml of

water for every calorie of food, and this equates to 2-2.5litres a day. This ignores the fact that

most foods are metabolised to CO2 and H2O.

Also unless you live in an extremely hot environment or job, you can get by on 1 litre of fluid

of any type. Another myth is that alcohol and caffeine being diuretics cannot be considered in

the calculation, whereas the body compensates.

But are you not dehydrated before you experience thirst ?

No – recognised dehydration occurs at 5% blood volume loss, but we begin to feel thirst at

2% long before there is any significant loss of body fluids.

One useful side effect of taking on board extra fluid is that the distension of the stomach

causes release of hormones that tell the brain you are not so hungry, so instead waking to

have a nocturnal meal, have a glass of water instead and keep your weight down.

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Mark Twain pondered that

The only way to keep your health

Is to eat what you don’t want

Drink what you don’t like

And do what you’d druther not

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The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time

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Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn’t

After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that

a new bell ringer was needed. The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went

up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills,

he had decided to call it a day.

Just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job.

The bishop was incredulous. 'You have no arms !'

'No matter,' said the man. 'Observe !' And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful

melody on the carillon.

The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo.

But suddenly, as he rushed forward to strike the bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the

belfry window to his death in the street below.

The stunned bishop rushed down two hundred and ninety five church steps and when he reached the street, a

crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moment before.

As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, 'Bishop, who was this man ?'..

'I don't know his name,' the bishop sadly replied,

WAIT FOR IT!!!

' .................... BUT HIS FACE RINGS A BELL'

WAIT ! WAIT ! There's more

The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death of the

armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.

The first man to approach him said, 'Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to

his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honour his life by allowing me to replace him in this

duty.' The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped to pick up a

mallet to strike the first bell, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around, and died on the spot.

Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side.

'What has happened ? Who is this man ?' the first monk asked breathlessly.

'I don't know his name,' sighed the distraught bishop, 'but....'

(. . . Wait for it ....)

'HE'S A DEAD RINGER FOR HIS BROTHER.'

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Wordsworth and Shakespeare were out walking together, discussing poetry composition, when they passed a man with very bowed legs. 'Why don't we make up a stanza about that man we have just seen?' said Shakespeare. 'Oh, that's easy' said Wordsworth, and went on to declaim this verse…..

'One day when walking down the road

I met a man whose legs were bowed.' 'That's far too simple.' said Shakespeare, who immediately launched into his stanza.

'What kind of worthy man is this

Who walks with his balls in parenthesis?'

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South West Get Together

November 14th

2013 Pinjarra Civic Centre hosted by our club

Well, the die is cast. Our final numbers for the event are 185, so hope we have enough

cakes, savouries etc for the morning and afternoon teas.

Have had a very poor response from all the companies that I have written to regarding items

to go in our gift bags, so had to go shopping and buy a couple of things.

Have been very lucky with club donations for the raffle. Jill Brown has donated one of her

paintings and Elizabeth Ford has made a huge panda to add to the mix.

Colin Brown has offered to come and play music from the Shadows, and the Settlers Singers

will also be entertaining us on the day. Bookings for the historic walking tours were a bit

erratic, so we have had to change the times and make up 3 tours instead of just 2.

I have given up sleeping and just lie in bed thinking of all the thousand and one things that

have to be done.

My committee are all doing their share, so I am not doing it alone, but ...........!!!

To those who are coming to the event, I hope you enjoy it.

Sandy

SOCIALLY SPEAKING

Just for us

November: Thursday 14th South West Get Together Venue: Pinjarra Civic Centre December; Tuesday 3rd Christmas Lunch – Fairbridge Farm Money for this event must be paid by or at the November meeting. $30 per head. Could everyone also please bring an item for the Christmas Hamper to the November meeting as the December meeting will be AFTER the Christmas Lunch. No out of date items please. Tins of fruit, jars of vegetables, biscuits, nuts, lollies, chocolate and Christmas treats are all needed to make up our Hamper.

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MEMBERS MEMORIES

On the 25th October 1952, just 60 years ago, the official opening of the new Murray District Hospital

took place and was declared open by the Premier Sir Ross McLarty. It certainly was a very welcome

asset to the district as the old hospital had deteriorated to such a poor state and the population had

increased so rapidly that there were insufficient beds to cope.

I joined the staff of the old hospital in 1951 as a double certificated registered nurse, having

completed my general training – 3 ½ years in Princess Margaret Hospital and 1 year in Midwifery at

Royal Hospital for Women in Sydney. After nursing in two of the best equipped and most modern

hospitals, it was a great shock to come to a crowded and poorly equipped country hospital.

The building had originally been a private home which had eleven rooms and, as time passed,

additions had been made. The hospital was equipped for general, surgical and medical, plus

maternity cases. The general section was comprised of a men’s and a women’s ward, one private

room and the overflow was accommodated on the verandah. The other end of the building was the

maternity ward with a labour ward attached.

In 1951, Dr Whelan, who had been the local doctor for many years, died and Dr Barber from the UK

became the resident general practitioner and soon afterwards Dr Webster, a broad speaking Scot, took

up the position as surgeon. Before Dr Webster’s arrival, we had the occasional surgical operation

and, on these occasions, a doctor from Boddington would visit and carry out the procedure, but that

soon changed. For every one appendectomy performed before, we were now having three or more.

The amazing thing was that everyone survived and what’s more, they did not complain again. It was

quite a joke with the staff, as it seemed almost fashionable to have one’s appendix removed. With all

this activity, the autoclave worked almost 24 hours a day to sterilize instruments and dressings. The

pressure on the staff was enormous.

Another problem to contend with was the shortage of blood in emergency cases, so we often had to

call on the locals to come in to give blood. There were a few known locals who were universal

donors, so they were called on more frequently than others. A universal donor is a person with a

particular blood group that is compatible and can be given to anyone without going through a cross

matching procedure.

Security was never a problem in those days, in fact, I don’t think the doors even had keys and even

the drugs were freely accessible.

The nursing station was the room right in the centre of the building and this was where all the activity

took place. One corner was Matron’s office, in another area the secretary carried out her duties and

the remainder was used by the nursing staff.

The kitchen was also under pressure and most inadequate for the job required. It was a favourite

place to visit when on evening shift because quite a few possums had taken up residence in the

ceiling. For some unknown reason there was a huge manhole which was always open and the

possums would come regularly to be fed, often carrying babies on their backs. It was a great

attraction and source of amusement.

Nursing in this hospital was a wonderful experience and everyone got on so well together. Only one

of the nursing staff owned a vehicle and that was Matron, so our trips down the street to the shops

were always on foot. Cigarettes were rationed and most of the staff were smokers. I will never

forget those rounds of each shop to procure whatever was available as shops were limited to quotas.

The staff accommodation was first class, as the building was very new, and it was great to relax in a

lovely hot bath after a long, hard shift. Regular social functions were held in the large living room

and quite a few romances blossomed. If fact, during my three years on the staff, five of us resigned

to marry young, handsome farmers, raised families and became involved in community affairs.

The new hospital, which began as a busy regional centre, was downgraded when the Peel Hospital

was built.

Murray District Hospital has gone through many changes during these 60 years and now fulfils a new

role, partly as a Drs Medical Centre and Surgery and the remainder for convalescent and geriatric

patients. The fate of the nurses quarters was not such a success story. Due to gross neglect, it was

demolished a couple of years ago and, I might add, it was not easy task to push it over as it was such a

solid structure. It was a very sad ending, but the memories linger on.

Marie Paterson. (2012)

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In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a woman who was waiting for a bus was wearing a tight leather

skirt. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too

tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and

with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that

this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again, she tried to make the step only to discover

she still couldn't. So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her

skirt a little more. For the second time, attempted the step, and, once again, much to her chagrin, she

could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little

more and again was unable to make the step. About this time, a large Texan who was standing

behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus.

She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and screeched,

"How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!'

The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you

unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we was friends."

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Superstition

Champagne is considered a lucky wine. The bottle, the cork and the wine itself all have

fortunate connotations and are therefore chosen to celebrate almost any special event or

ritual, including child-birth, baptism and marriage. The significance of the ritual of

launching a ship with a bottle of champagne lies in both the smashing of the bottle across the

bows and the words that are spoken as the act is performed.

The significance of the smashed bottle comes from the ghastly ritual that demanded the

death of a boy against the side of the ship as a blood sacrifice to the sea gods. For every new

ship, a young boy would die in this violent fashion. A champagne bottle is a far more joyful

version of the original. And the words that are spoken as the bottle crashes down – “I name

this ship the SS Enterprise” are equally important. The name must never be changed or bad

luck will ensue.

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The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law Paddy in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase. "What happened Paddy ?" she asks anxiously. "What happened!! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip. I get home... and guess what I found ? Yes, your daughter, my wife, with Joe Murphy in our marital bed! This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!" "Ah now, calm down, calm down Paddy!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened." Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. "Paddy. I told you there must be a simple explanation .....she never got your email."

PROBUS RENDEZVOUS 2013

The comings and goings of our trip to and from Wodonga

At 9.00 a,m, on the 17th Sept 4 people left South Yunderup for the trek across the Nullabor.

The Snabels and the McClellands) When we stopped for fuel for both the vans and ourselves we were

joined by The Haywards, (who had leave later as the water pump on the van had broken) Now we

are six.

From there we drove until we reached Bedellen, where we decided was a good place to spend the

night. We set up camp and as it was cold we were able to light a camp fire. Just as we were retiring it

was discovered we were parked about 30 metres from a railway line, and the first train roared through.

With the trucks going past all night and trains almost on the hour it was a long night.

Next stop was 16ks from Norseman. this spot had no trains, and we chose a spot about half a km into

the bush. Meet a nice couple from Binningup who called in for a drink. 4 hours later they went home

with their chairs and bottles and as it was quite dark our boys tied a torch around the man’s neck and

off they went.(our torch was returned next morning. they have even invited us to visit them at their

home when we get back, silly people.

As The Rinaldis were to meet us today we decided to stay another night and give them time to catch

up and rest. So now there are eight of us.

From there we travelled across the Nullabor Plain, but that is a whole other story.

At Ceduna, after throwing out all our fruit and veg, for the first time, we parted ways with the

McClellands who were heading north to visit their son. Back to six.

Next stop Smokey Bay, and the best oysters ever. And we sure enjoyed them.

After 2 nights of wind we moved onto Streaky Bay, more oysters and plenty of sight seeing.

Four of us decided to move over the Peninsular to Tumby Bay.

The Rinaldis would not leave the oysters. Back to four

What a delightful place this is. We watched the grand final being played with the local R.S.L'

members, and as we left, the president came out the front to wave us goodbye. (I think he was making

sure we left). But we sure brightened up their day.

Port Augusta was a one night stop. as a big storm was coming and the locals suggested to move the

vans to a more protected area. Yacca was to be our place for the night. Nice place no one in town

except a man with the key to the gate of the park we were to stay.

The wind was horrific, and it never stopped raining for a minute.

So we moved on to Burra, where the caravan park was full, due to the next storm front due that night,

but the local show ground could take us in. That was almost full, and as the McClellands were due to

arrive that day, we managed to save them a place.

They arrived just before the storm and if we thought the one the night before was bad we were in for a

surprise that night. We could not move out the next day or night as it just did not stop. But at least

there are now six of us again.

Nights spent on the Murray River were amazing and highly recommended, we bush camped for 5

nights.

Wodonga is only a day away, and we are looking forward to arriving for a rest and stocking up with

fresh food as we stopped buying any because the Fruit Fly man was everywhere.

On Saturday we became eight again with the arrival of the Murrays, and Sunday we made it to nine

with Marg Gallin arriving. So now we are complete.

There will be more news in the next Murray Magpie, as we have all decided to let you know what a

fantastic time can be had on this type of travel.

Fran Snabel

KITCHEN KAPERS

FISH PIE 350g mixed chopped fish, such as smoked cod, whiting, salmon etc.

450ml milk, plus extra for mash

450g potatoes

1 leek, chopped

75g butter, plus extra for mash

1 tblspn flour

1 tblspn chopped chives

Salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste

50g grated cheddar cheese

Preheat oven to 180 degC. Put the fish in a shallow saucepan and add the milk. Bring to the boil with the lid on and then simmer for 5 mins. Remove from the heat and allow to cool. Peel and chop the potatoes and boil for 20 to 25 minutes. Once cooked, drain the potatoes and mash with a little extra mile and butter. Steam or boil the leek for 7 minutes until soft. Once the fish is cool enough to handle, pour the milk it was cooked in into a bowl or jug and flake the fish into an ovenproof dish, discarding any skin or bones. Add the leek. Melt the butter in a saucepan and add the flour. Cook over a low heat for a couple of minutes stirring all the time, then add the milk the fish was cooked in, a little at a time, until the sauce thickens. Add chives and season to taste. Whisk to ensure there are no lumps and then keep stirring, adding a little extra milk if needed to make a thick, smooth sauce. Take off the heat and stir in half the grated cheese. Pour the sauce over the fish and leek. Cover evenly with the mashed potato and use a fork to make patterns on the surface. For extra flavor, add the other half of the grated cheese on top. Bake for 20 minutes or until the top is golden and the fish mixture underneath is bubbling. Serve with peas, beans or broccoli. Serves 2.

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Strawberry and Cinnamon Toasties

8 large strawberries

1 tbspn sugar

4 slices white bread (also delicious made with fruit loaf)

40g butter at room temperature

1 tspn cinnamon

Slice the strawberries, add a sprinkle of sugar, crush them a little with a fork and set aside.

Preheat the sandwich maker or toastie.

Spread the bread with a thin layer of butter. Beat the remaining butter and sugar with the cinnamon.

Put two pieces of bread, butter side down, into the sandwich maker.

Spread the cinnamon butter over the bread and top with the strawberry slices.

Put the two remaining pieces of bread on top, butter side up, and close the lid.

Once the toasties are done, remove them from the machine and cut each into two triangles.

Leave them for a few minutes to cool then serve with more strawberry slices placed over the top.

Serves 2