Writing For Humans: 10 Tips to Defeat Robot

Overlords of Copy

9/22/16 1pm Eastern

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Our guest presenter »

Sheena Greer @colludos

Writer & Strategist, Colludo (Latin for “play together”)

Over a decade experience helping nonprofits learn, reflect, create and connect

Copywriting and fundraising strategy: newsletters, blog annual reports, appeals

Writing for Humans

10 Tips to Defeat the Robot Overlords of Copy

About sheena

I’m serious about writing.

I’m silly about everything else.

CERTAIN PERIL

& DANGER AWAIT

In the world of nonprofit copywriting…

The Most Dangerous

Thing in the Universe…

Unspeakable horrors from outer space.

Human bats & robot gangsters.

A woman scorned.

A sketchy seafood restaurant.

Your in-laws.

Ted “I’m totally not an evil robot” Danson.

The most dangerous thing in theUniverse is a boring story.

Boring is confusing.

NOT TODAY, BRAD.

Boring is not emotional.

Boring strands the reader.

There wasn't actually any war at all.Everyone just hung out, drank bluespace milk, and sat around looking attwo suns. It was pleasant. Nice even.Like white wonder bread, the world wasneither spectacular or horrible. It justwas. And so everyone schlepped on likebowls of tapioca pudding that happenedto be graced with skin and eyes (thoughno one ever questioned why), hohumming their way through space as ifnothing actually mattered, and they kindof liked it that way.

Boring leads to apathy.

“The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything.”

-Albert Einstein(who looks particularly bored in this photo)

What Makes A

Story Boring?

Long-winded, ego-driven, jargon-filled brain diarrhea filled with cold-fish salespeak that is predictable yet nonsensical because it tries to make too many points and yet somehow manages to make no point at all.

Long-winded, ego-driven, jargon-filled brain diarrhea filled with cold-fish salespeak that is predictable yet nonsensical because it tries to make too many points and yet somehow manages to make no point at all.

Long-winded, ego-driven, jargon-filled brain diarrhea filled with cold-fish salespeak that is predictable yet nonsensical because it tries to make too many points and yet somehow manages to make no point at all.

Long-winded, ego-driven, jargon-filled brain diarrhea filled with cold-fish salespeak that is predictable yet nonsensical because it tries to make too many points and yet somehow manages to make no point at all.SO WHAT!?!??!??!

A mind-numbingnote from our boring leader.

GIVE US UR MONIES.

And now for some numbers that makeno sense.

The long list ofbullet pointsyou should definitely memorize.

Here are some particularly concerning statistics.

Just look at how awesome we are at doing stuff.

Meaningful caption not currently available.

I’M SO BORED RIGHT NOW!

Know Your Audience

• Who is reading?• Why are they reading?• What do you want them to do?• How will they react to the

content?

Segmentation

Giving Levels Demographics Worldview

Empathy Mapping

See

Think & Feel

Hear

Pain

Do & Say

Gain

www.colludo.ca/blog/empathy-mapping

• Jeanie, retired, 75• Annual gifts, $250-500• Widowed, kids, grandkids• Doesn’t trust technology• Loves cats, tea, Alex Trebek

• 3D Robot Monster, 392• Is ¾ machine• Only emotion is rage• Programmed to enjoy

stealing women from beach picnics, Alex Trebek

Imaginary Editorial Board

Start where yourdonors are, not where youwant them to be.

Lou Reed(not actually an alien)

I’ll be yourmirror,reflect whatyou are incaseyou don’t know.

Homework•Read my blog post on empathy mapping and give it a try with your donors.

Focus on your Donor

• Make your donor the hero• Address your donor directly• Make it about them• Fill it with gratitude

youCircle the Yous

Get personal

Greetings Earthlings…

Dear Friends of ABC Org…

• Show their impact• Accomplishment reporting

(theirs, not yours)

• Be a conduit• Be an active listener• Be a helper

Homework•Practice your listening skills. Chances are you could use a tune up.

Get Emotional

• Reason/Logic vs Emotion• Consider emotional range• Aim for authenticity

Dear child,

We appreciate you and your continued efforts towards excellence.

Respectfully,Management of the Miller Family.

To my glorious last born and only daughter,

My heart sings and swells with pride when I reminisce on the many ways in which your stupendous talents overwhelm your mother and I with wondrous joy!

Sheen Beans,

I love you and I’m your number one fan. Your mom and I are so proud of you!

Love ya,Dad

Sheen Beans,

I love you and I’m your number one fan. Your mom and I are so proud of you!

Love ya,Dad

Personalized

Authentic

From one person to another

Dear Joan,

You helped me beat cancer in just 15 days. And it’s all because you made a donation to ABC Hospital. Thank you!

Yours in good health,Nancy

I’ve felt this way before, but never thought about it quite like that.

Observation & Empathy

Homework•Watch your favourite stand up comedian. Take notes on how they use observation and empathy.

Be Plain & Simple

• Destroy jargon• Short sentences• Few characters

It has come to the attention of management that an excess in ultra contemporary diminutive humanoid garments for lower body extremities has unfortunately resulted in increased pressure to downsize due to inadequate performance.

For sale: baby shoes, never worn.

Homework•Rewrite your latest appeal letter as a haiku.

Don’t Cover Too Much

SMIT(Single Most Important Thing)

To: one single personFrom: one single personAbout: one single thing

Engage Ask Thank Report Repeat

Be Clear About the Action

Engage Ask Thank Report Repeat

Why are you telling this story in the first place??

Have a point and get to it

Homework•Before you start, write the “why” on a sticky note. Refer to it often.

Make Numbers Mean Something

If I look at the mass, I will never act.If I look at the one, I will.

Mother Teresa

50% of the 790,000 children under the age of 11 in Big City will develop diabetes.

Alexa has a 50/50 chance of getting diabetes.

Homework•Go through your latest piece and try rewriting every statistic to create a story about one person.

Show, Don’t Tell

Jeff Brooks

Jeff Brooksin a space helmet.

• Color is better than black and white. • Eye contact.• One person is better than many

people.• People work better than things.• Stock photography seldom works.• Probably don’t draw a space helmet

in MS Paint.

Homework•Study the images in your (and other org’s) communications. Note what sucks and what works.

No Intergalactic Committees

“I don’t like that.”“I don’t think our donors would like that.”

“It’s too emotional.”

“It needs more facts.”“It’s too different.”

“My opinion matters.”

“I don’t like that.”“I don’t think our donors would like that.”

“It’s too emotional.”

“It needs more facts.”“It’s too different.”

“My opinion matters.”

NOPE

You are the

colludos@gmail.com

Read & Learn

Jeff Brooksin a space helmet

Tom Ahern with weird brain tentacles

Mary Cahalanewho has a laser in her space crown

Gail Perry in badass teleportation armor

… and so many more …

Sheena Greer with crayons in her nose(not photoshopped)

Homework•Take even 15 minutes everyday to read.

Enjoy Yourself

• Love your stories• Love your audience• Believe in your ability

Be curious with the shape of the stone.

Let us review

Boring is dangerousbecause it leads

to apathy.

A mind-numbingnote from our boring leader.

GIVE US UR MONIES.

And now for some numbers that makeno sense.

The long list ofbullet pointsyou should definitely memorize.

Here are some particularly concerning statistics.

Just look at how awesome we are at doing stuff.

Meaningful caption not currently available.

Too often, our typical content is boring(and weird)

Get to know who you’re talking to.

Focus on your donor.

Don’t be afraid of using emotional language.

Keep it simple.

And don’t cover too much!

Make your numbers mean something.

And make your images mean something, too.

Be clear about what you want the reader to do.

Learn all you can and step into the role.

Enjoy what you do.

Homework

•Send me an email.

www.colludo.cacolludos@gmail.com@colludos306-230-1951

Thank you!

Questions?

https://bloomerang.co/resources

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