Wynken, Blynken, And Nod Issue 4

8/2/2019 Wynken, Blynken, And Nod Issue 4

1/18

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http://quiver.knox.edu/wynkenblynken/

E-mail: [email protected]


2/18

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Forgotten Memories ........................Makenzi Crouch, 2010

Pictures .....................................Mary Firor, 2012

Something Like Seventh and Baker.............

Sydney Stensland, 2013

Black Bow .................................Kathy Brown, 2010

*Cover picture by Sasha Jawed, 2010


3/18

Crouch 1

Forgotten Memories

Makenzi Crouch

The first thing I can remember is my christening. Ribbons dangled above me; somewhere overthem, a priest chanted in the Old Tongue. Expensive fabrics rustled as fairy after fairy bent over the cradle

to gift me with things traits and then retreat. They were silly gifts, golden hair and blue eyes and a perfect

complexion, all impractical and useless. Their faces blurred together, differing only by the colour of their

elaborately dressed hair.

The story was told so often, later, so it seemed like I could actually remember what happened.

Mother told me that the sky grew dark as the sixth fairy, who had bestowed upon me a willowy frame,

stepped away. The sun disappeared behind the dark clouds that roiled overhead, and the wind picked up,

lashing the trees angrily back and forth, branches snapping. Guests clung to their hats and huddledbeneath the canopies as the first drops of rain hurtled down.

She was tall, and angular, and she walked through the crowds without needing to push, because

people shied away from her when she drew near. When she reached my cradle she halted and stared down

at me. I cried, for her hard, angry face frightened me, and no one came to stop her as she lifted me from

the cradle. She held me in her arms and smiled, and laid a curse on me, a curse that someday I would

prick my finger on a spindle and die, and though I did not know what a spindle was, I wailed, for I was

afraid.

The woman returned me to my cradle and left the same way she had come. No one stopped her,or even went near her. No one moved until the clouds rolled away, the wind vanished, and the sun

returned, and only then did my mother pick me up and beg the fairies to do something. But only the

seventh fairy replied.

I am not a powerful fairy, she said, her face pale. I am too young. I ca nnot undo what has been

done, onlyalter it, and even that I can only do a little. I can change the curse so that you know on what

day her finger will touch the spindle, though it can be no further than her seventeenth birthday. And I can

change it so that she will sleep for one hundred years rather than die, and then live again, unless some

prince manages to rescue her before then. But more than that, I cannot do.

My parents begged the fairy to do what she could, and it was done. No one was ever able to

explain to me why the tall woman cursed me; I believe my mother knew, but it was one of many things

that she was never able to tell me.

*


4/18

Crouch 2

The next memory I have is of sitting outside in the grass, dew wet on my face. The scent of

flowers and my mothers perfume lingered in the air around me; it was a cool spring day, and the birds

were singing and Mothers light laughter rang in my ears. I was seven or eight, still unaware of my fate; I

didnt know that I would be alone and forgotten for one hundred years.I spent many days outside with Mother; she was young, with little to concern her outside of my

eventual end, and she loved to take me on walks through the fields and along the shore. But that day was

different, because it was the last perfectly happy day I spent with my mother, and it was the day that I

remembered later as the day that I killed her.

Princess Aderyn, my nursemaid called as I skipped too close to the stream, Princess, come

away from there. Youll fall in and catch cold.

Let her be, my mother said, coming to join me. Let her enjoy life while she can. She sat down

next to me on the bank, pulling off her shoes and stockings and dangling her feet in the water. With amischievous smile, I splashed my mother in the face. She retaliated, and soon we were both soaking wet,

much to my nursemaids dismay.

Mother carried me home later, fast asleep on her shoulder; she refused to change until she was

certain that I was warm and dry and put to bed. She caught a cold a few days later, which slowly moved

down into her chest and turned into a deep cough. If I hadnt started that water fight, perhaps Mother

wouldnt have got sick. Perhaps she wouldnt have died.

*

I remember the day she died. It was late May, and she insisted upon being taken out to enjoy thebeautiful spring weather, though the Healer warned that she was too weak to be moved. She was carried

outside and set down in a field of wildflowers.

Rhosyn, my mother said to me as I stood beside her, holding her hand tightly, my little Aderyn

Rhosyn, will you bring me flowers? All kinds. I want to drown in flowers.

I left her and skipped around the field, gathering armfuls of blossoms and returning to pile them

around my mother. It never occurred to me how seriously ill she was.

On my last turn about the field, I spotted a flower that I had never seen before, half hidden in a

tangle of leaves and brambles. As I tugged on it, determined to take it back to Mother, tiny thorns dugcruelly into my hands and lower arms, leaving fine red lines criss-crossing my skin. Finally, I pulled the

bloom free and returned to give it to Mother, who noticed my injured arms first.

Rhosyn, darling, what have you been doing? she exclaimed, and tried to sit up, though my

father wouldnt let her.


5/18

Crouch 3

What is it, Mother? I asked, holding out the flower. She took it and touched one of the pink

petals.

Its a briar rose, she said. I havent seen one in years. Its lovely. She hesitated, and then

shooed my father and her attendants away; they left with great reluctance, and she turned to me with a sadexpression in her eyes. Rhosyn, she said quietly, you know I am very ill. I am very much afraidI do

not think I will be in your life for very much longer, and it makes me very sad to know that I will not see

you grow up. Come closer. I stepped nearer and she clasped my hands in hers, the rose falling to her

breast. I want to tell you something, that my mother told me. I want you to know that you should never

be afraid to be who you want to be. You have such a lovely spirit, Rhosyn, just as I did when I was little.

Dont let anyone take that away from you. It would be a shame if you wasted those precious few years

that you have Her voice caught, and her hands over mine shook. You are my only child, Rhosyn, and

you are more like me than anyone realises. Be who you want to be, my darling. She paused for breath,and one hand slipped to rest with her fingers wrapped around the stem of the rose; the other clung to mine

with her remaining strength. Her eyelids flickered, and she sank back into her litter with a little sigh. I

love you so very much, my little Aderyn Rhosyn, she said softly, almost inaudibly. Call your father.

I called for him without releasing my hold on Mothers hand. He hurried over, the He aler and the

priest a step behind. My mother died only minutes later, a quiet, tranquil smile on her face, and the priest

murmured the ritual words to release her soul. Father made as though to remove the briar rose and replace

the humble flower with something more queenly, but I wouldnt let him. I folded her hands across the

stem myself, my vision blurring with tears, and then fled.*

I am missing pieces of my life; there are gaps, great gaping holes that should be full of emotion

and memory and description, but there is nothing. I dont know if it was part of the curse, or if I blocked

out things after my mother died, but after she left my life, I lost part of my memory, leaving it patchy,

fragmented, disjointed. Maybe it is simply too long ago. What little I remember is quiet and dull; after

Mothers death, Father was reluctant to let me out of the castle, and as a result I spent most of my time in

my room or on the battlements, staring down at the shore. It hurt too much to actually go to the places I

had always gone with Mother.I was twelve when my nursemaid accused me of causing my mothers death; she was Mothers

nursemaid before she was mine, and she had always been far more loyal to the queen than to me. Father

tried to convince me otherwise; he even dismissed the woman, but the thought was already there. Mother

wouldnt have got sick if she hadnt got wet. And that was my fault. After that, I shut myself up in my

room even more than I had before, often forgetting to eat, and rarely sleeping well.


6/18

Crouch 4

Soon after that, I was told of the curse for the first time. I had heard rumours, of course, but until

then, no one had ever explained exactly what it was. I was warned to beware of a spindle, and to never

touch one, but I did not know what a spindle was, what it looked like, what it was used foreveryone

was so busy making certain that I knew not to go near one that they never bothered to explain what onewas.

*

I had requested that the bush I had plucked the briar rose from be uprooted and transplanted to

below my window, where it had grown until every spring and summer I had little blooms nodding in at

me every day. They reminded me of my mother, and I loved them, in a bittersweet sort of way.

My seventeenth birthday finally drew near, and Father began to worry, but I could not share his

concern; I had been overprotected since Mother had died, and the only thing I truly cared about was that

she would not be there on the day I was meant to meet my curse.The evening of my birthday, I went for a walk before the banquet in an attempt to clear my head.

I was in something of a reverie, desperately wishing for my mother, and when she appeared ahead of me

at the foot of a spiral stair, smiling and laughing, my heart leaped. Rationally, I knew she was gone, had

been gone for years, but when she beckoned for me to follow, a sweet smile on her face and her lovely

auburn hair floating around her, I could not, did not question, but instead followed her. We went round

and round, up the stairs; it was one of the staircases from the oldest part of the castle, a staircase that no

one used anymore because so many of the stones in the steps had crumbled away. I caught the hem of my

skirt again and again, ruining my new birthday gown that had been embroideredby my requestacrossthe bodice and in little sprays over the skirt with tiny rosebuds and brambles and leaves.

The stairs led to one of the tallest towers, in one of the least safe parts of the castle; like the stones

in the stairs, many of the stones in the floor of the tower had crumbled away over the years, leaving dark

holes scattered around the room. My mother gestured towards a strange wooden contraption in the middle

of the chamber, and glided over to it, motioning for me to follow. I followed in a daze, settling down

before it, reaching out to touch the pointed end of the object that stood at one end, and asked what it was.

And then she was no longer Mother, but instead the tall, angular woman from my christening, and she

spoke the name,spinning wheel

, and as my finger touched the pointed end she laughed, and whispered,spindle, my Sleeping Beauty, spindle.

*

Needless to say, memories for the next hundred years simply do not exist. I slept through all of

that time. I dont know what happened in the castle after I pricked my finger, but I dreamed.


7/18

Crouch 5

The briar rose grew up to my tower and wound itself around it, the blossoms creeping through the

holes in the floor and smiling at me in my dreams. A rose-spirit kept me company while I slept, a shy,

curious rose-spiritand that is all I remember. I may have dreamed other dreams, but dreams are fleeting

things, like fog drifting over water, and I have no recollection of them.When I finally woke from that dream, it was not to some kiss, some handsome prince gently

pressing his lips to mine, having battled through the briar brambles surrounding the castle. No, I woke to

a silent chamber, alone except for my briar roses, and I realised that I must have slept the whole hundred

years, and no prince had come to rescue me.

I made my way down from the tower and out of the castle, and realised that no one else had been

cursed along with me. I walked along the shore, which had changed little, and then made my way out into

the world, which I discovered had changed greatly while I had slept, for now life was faster, and clothes

were different, and I realised that in thisworld, it wouldnt matter that I had once been a princess. Mymother had told me once upon a time to be who I wanted to be, and to never let my spirit be crushed.

Now I had that chance.

Because nownow my life had become a fairy tale, a fairy tale and a girl that the world had

forgotten.


8/18

Firor 1

Mary Firor


9/18

Stensland 1

Something like Seventh and Baker

Sydney Stensland

An empty Tuesday afternoon brought me byAn old brick bookstore with a

Flat front and two split windows.

Behind the desk, a half molted parrot sleptIn a twisted aluminum cage linedWith pages torn from a textbook detailing theRudimentary elements of sedimentary stonesAnd their practical applications.

A hairy man, no younger than fifty,Compared his scruffy profile

To that of Bombadil in a smudgy windowpane.And a pair of panting college kids gushedOver the benefits of being ambidextrousWhen it comes to bandagingElbows, Achilles tendons, pattelas,and other fancy corners of the body.

Dazed, I turned back toBombadil, who was sizing me up likeSome Low-Cal Snack Pack. I replaced the copyOf Brilliant Breakfasts I was eyeingBack on its shelf and shuffled out

To recollect on the empty sidewalk outside.


10/18

Brown 1

Black Bow

Kathy Brown

Im hugging Mamas leg. Shes talking to lots of people wearing dark pants and dresses who alllook the same. I cant see their faces cause theyre so much taller. Mama always tells me to stay close to

her when we go to church, cause one time I ran through the aisles and she and Daddy got mad. Thiss as

close as I can get. Her hand pushes my hair. Messes up my bow. She wouldnt let me wear the sparkly

blue one she bought for me last week. Its black today, and my dress is itchy.

Daddys lying across the room, not-sleeping. Mama made sure I knew he wasnt sleeping.

She said, This isnt easy to say, Ellie, but Daddy died. Hes been very sick, and he had to leave

us. When she said this, she started crying again. I didnt know why. I had a fish once, and Mama said it

died. But Daddy isnt a fish, so that would be silly. Daddy wont fit down the toilet. Johnny Mainard atdaycare was gone for a week when his grandma died. But thats just something grandmas do. I thought.

Now Mamas talking to someone, but I cant see their face. The other lady says, Its never a

good time for them to go, but at least you know hes in a better place now.

I dont think church is any better than our house. We go eve ry Sunday after we eat pancakes. The

only fun thing about it is the pretty colored windows I look out while the grown-up people talk. But

sometimes theres singing.

What happened to Daddy, Mama? I ask and I let go of her leg.

Mama stops talking to the lady and kneels down to me so I can see her face. Mamas crying, andher face is turning red and puffy. Like my Cabbage Patch doll. Daddys not here anymore. He died.

Remember, sweetie? We talked about this at the hospital. Were here to say goodbye.

But then where did he go?

Mama sighs. I dont know what I said to make her so sad. She hasnt smiled at all today. I just

want to know why people think Daddy went somewhere when hes right at the other end of the room.

Mama stands up and wipes her eyes on her hand. She turns around to talk to the man in the dress whos

standing behind her. Hes the man who talks to us at church every Sunday. The Priest Man.

Father, could you please try to explain to Ellie? she whispers to him, I think she might need to

hear it from someone else, and I just cant bring myself to say it again. Not today. Mama sniffs with her

nose. I wanna hug her leg again, but the man in the dress touches my shoulder and kneels down to look at

me close up.


11/18

Brown 2

The Priest Man makes a loud noise with his throat like Daddy does sometimes, but different. Not

as loud. Ellie, people have probably said a lot of things to you about your dad over the past few days.

Am I right? I bob my head up and down yes. Do you know what any of it means?

He sure asks a lot of questions. I say, That he gets to sleep at church, but Mama wont let me. Iknow thats not right. I know Mama told me hes not -sleeping, but everyone keeps telling me different

things.

No, Ellie. Your dad is gone. He went to Heaven, with God, like I tell you about every week. He

was in a lot of pain, but now hes not. Heaven is a wonderful place, and hes very happy there. Maybe

if Mama and I go to Heaven to visit Daddy, shell be happy again. In a way, hes everywhere, all at

once.

But he just said that Daddy was in Heaven. I look down at the floor to see if Daddys face is there

just in case.Just carpet.

I scrunch my face at the man in the dress. Hes a liar. Daddy isnt in the carpet. Hes on the table,

not-sleeping. Mama always tells me not to play on the furniture.

After a minute, the man in the dress goes back to where he was and I run over to hug Mamas leg

like I wanted to before.

Even though Mama is sad today, shes still very pretty. Her dress is long and flowy, and I like it

even if it is black. I try to fix my bow so I can look pretty too, even if I dont like the black one. But my

dress isnt flowy like Mamas. Its just black with a few pink ruffles I wish there was more ruffles. Ihave a pretty white and pink underdress on under my black dress though, so I can pretend that Im like

Mama in her fancy dress.

I also dont feel too bad cause Im not the only one wearing an ugly dress. Everyones wearing

black. Its too quiet and I just want to go play in the waterfall at the front of the church, but Mama told me

Im not supposed to do that. Its hole-y water. But there arent any holes in it.

People keep coming over to Mama and me before they leave the church. Uncle Simon and Aunt

Mary are here. They stop by and say hi, but they look sad. Uncle Simon usually picks me up and spins me

around, but not today. There are also too many ladies with pointy black shoes. Everywhere. Im afraid

one of them is going to poke me in the feet like a fork. Too pointy. And everybody thinks Mama lost

something. But shes holding her bag with her lips stick and jangley ring with keys, so I cant think of

what shes lost. But those people are all leaving, so Im not that scared. Theres only a few of them left

now.


12/18

Brown 3

A lady who smells like when I get dandelion powder on my face is here now, and she keeps

blowing her nose into a napkin. Shes too smelly, and I sneeze. I wipe my nose on my dress. Ellie dear,

dont do that, the smelly lady says. Pulls my dress out of my hands. I stick my tongue out at her. She

looks at Mama. This must be so hard for her, she says. She blows her noise again. If she has a cold sheshouldnt be here. I dont want to get sick, and Mama always tells me not to touch people when theyre

coughy and sniffy,but the smelly lady keeps touching Mamas arm.

Once when I was at daycare, I touched Johnny Mainard when I had the chicken pox, and his mom

came to our house and yelled that I got him sick. She just kept yelling at Mama and Daddy until Johnnys

mom turned dark red like a tomato and stomped off. Her shoes were pointy shoes too.

I hope Mama doesnt get sick. Grandmas too old to run over to the smelly ladys house to yell at

her if Mama gets the chicken pox. Daddys already sick. And Grandma is too spotty to turn red. The

chicken pox made me itchy. Not as itchy as my stupid black dress is making me today.Mama takes a step forward, and since Im holding tight to her leg, I move with it. Like a swing.

The bottom of her flowy skirt moves over my head. Im under her skirt like a fort. The lace on the bottom

of the skirt is tickling me on my neck, but not in the bad way like when Johnny tickled me under my arms

at my fourth birthday party to make me mad. I poke my head back out from under Mamas skirt and look

around.

Everyone looks so sad, but I still dont know why.

I reach up and tug on Mamas black dress. She doesnt notice at first. I pull harder. She sees me

and pulls me up from her leg. I wrap my legs around her stomach and hug her neck. She puts her head onme. Her hair smells like applesauce. Its soft. Not like my itchy dress. I put my forehead on hers and she

wiggles her nose on mine. Eskimo kisses.

Mama pulls back from me so I can look her. What is it, Ellie? she asks me as she wipes her

eyes. She isnt wearing purple stuff on her eyes like she normally does. But her eyes are all red. I like the

purple better. I hope smelly lady didnt get Mama sick already.

Are you sick, Mama?

No sweetie. Im just, well, Im sad.

Cause Daddys not-sle

eping on the table?

Ellie, Daddy is gone. Remember?

I dont know why people keep telling me that! Daddys right across the room. Hes right there! I

tell Mama. But that just makes her frown more. A man passes by and says, Im sorry for your loss.

But I didnt lose anything! I checked before we left just to make sure cause everyone kept saying

it. All my stuffed animals are lined up in the window where I left them and my jewelry box with the


13/18

Brown 4

yellow unicorn that spins when I open it is right next to my bed and my acorn collection is hidden in

the box in the corner of my closet. Nothings missing.

Im hot and itchy. I squirm until mom puts me down. She has to talk to the people who keep

coming over to her. Its like her birthday party with all the old people. No one brought her presents.Maybe thats why shes sad.

I look at the benches the people in black were sitting on. I wanna run up and down them cause

the lights from the windows make pictures on the ground. I dont I remember the last time when I got

spanked. I crawl under a bench and watch everyone walk by. I count on my fingers when they pass me.

One. Two. Three. Daddys shoes! The brown ones with fringes that he wears to fancy places. Right there!

He must have gotten up! Now I can bring him back to Mama, and shell be happy again.

I crawl until I can poke my head out. I cant find his shoes anymore. Whered he go? I look at the

other benches and by the door where people are going. But Daddys not there.Oh. Hes still on the table. Still not-sleeping But I saw his shoes Saw him walking.

I take a breath. Pull up my itchy skirt. Ill go talk to Daddy, cause everyone else is ignoring him.

Hell know what to do. I fix my bow that Mama mussed up earlier, and even though it isnt the sparkl y

blue one, Daddy wont mind. I dont know why hes still lying over there, and I dont know why Mama is

so sad. Daddy will know how to fix her.

Im going to go ask him myself.

I trip a little bit when I start walking. I almost forgot that my shiny pink shoes are too big. Mama

says thats cause I will grow into them. I hope I dont. I like the ones with the red laces better. Mamasaid I only had to wear the big shiny ones for today.

I sneak up to the front of the church by the table Daddy is not-sleeping on. I can only kinda see

him now, just part of his head. The table is just as high as the top of my head. It touches my black bow

when I step under it.

Someone says my name I dont know who. Whats Ellie doing? they say. If I knew who it

was, I would te ll them. Im gonna wake Daddy up. When he falls asleep in front of the TV, I always jump

on his lap and wake him up. We laugh until Daddy starts to cough and turn red. I cant jump as high as

where hes on the table though. I try a couple times, but I cant pull myself up. So I try something else I

know will work. It does at home.

Daddy! DADDY! Wake up, silly goose! Everyone else is awake. Its not naptime! Theyre all

leaving without us! I shout. One time I yelled to wake him up. I scared him so much that he turned funny

colors. Same color as his red hair. Mama ran into the room and helped him up until he turned white again.


14/18

Brown 5

Hes always really white unless hes coughing. We were playing, but Mama told me to be careful.

Daddys sick. Gotta be careful.

But he doesnt have chicken pox.

I know Daddy isnt going to turn colors cause he doesnt move. I guess he is sleeping.But Mama said he wasnt asleep. And he isnt making funny snoring noises with his nose like he

normally does when he sleeps. I sometimes hold his nose shut when he snores, and he wakes up and

laughs. Never so much that he starts coughing though. Maybe hes faking it. Sometimes when I dont

want to go to daycare I pretend to be sleeping. Mama can always tell when Im really really sleeping.

Maybe she can wake Daddy up or make him stop pretending.

Im about to yell for my Mama, but my voice stops. Someone is pulling on the collar of my itchy

dress. I try to scream but the air is all gone from inside me and the words dont come out.

I spin around. The Priest Man. I kick him for pulling me. Once, Johnny Mainard pulled on mybraid. I stepped on his foot until he shouted. I had to sit in the corner for ten whole minutes. But he

stopped pulling on my braid.

The Priest Man yelps, like my cat when I step on her tail, and jumps back. Serves him right. I

dont think the Priest Man is very nice. Besides, hes wearing the wrong kind of clothes. Everyone calls

him fatherHes not my daddy.

Ellie! Mama says from behind the Priest Man. That is not how we treat people! Apologize to

him right now! That was notnice.

Buthes

not nice! I try to look as mad as Mama did when I drew flowers on the white sofa withmy new markers. I was just trying to make it prettier. She didnt like them very much I got time out.

Its alright, Im sure little Ellie didnt mean it, he says.

Did too! I stick out my tongue at him. Mama scoops me up.

Mama pretends she didnt hear and says, Ellie, we have to go somewhere else now, okay? She

hugs me to her so my face gets squashed, pushing my cheeks into a fish face.

Kay, I say, but since my face is all smushed it sounds like Kuh, and that makes me giggle.

Mama stops squeezing me. Her face is sad. I stop laughing. I dont like it when Mamas sad. She never

lets me fix it.We drive to a place with lots of rocks sticking out of the ground. It would be fun to run around

them. Some of them are pretty, and some of them have rock people with wings growing out of them

Angels. But since Mama is so sad, I only kinda think about playing around with them. She needs me to

stay close.


15/18

Brown 6

We stop after walking a little, and Mama holds me so close I dont see whats happening. The

Priest Man talks a lot, saying things about Daddy and how he is a good person and how everybody loves

him. I already know that. Everybody else is really quiet.

Mama keeps whispering, Its gonna be okay, Ellie, its gonna be okay. Mamas here.When we start walking away from the place outside, I remember Daddy is still at the church on

the table. I dont want to leave him there, and Mama probably forgot.

Isnt Daddy coming with us?

No, Ellie, Daddys not coming with.

*

Everything happens so fast, and Im in the car, strapped into my seat in the back. Mama held me

so tight outside. I didnt see anything but her shoulder. Im happy she did that cause whatever

everyone else was looking at must have been really sad. I peeked a little and all the grown ups werecrying.

The car ride is quiet. Mama isnt playing any music so she isnt singing along or tapping her

fingers on the wheel. I watch her from my seat. I dont ask why she isnt playing music cause the more

questions I ask the more sad she gets.

So I sit here in my itchy dress until we get home. One of my shiny pink shoes fell off on the way

to the car. I knew Mama would be mad, so I dont say anything. My toes wiggle through my white tights

on my cold foot.

From my seat in the back I can just see out the window. Trees pass us and I watch the cottonclouds until I feel the bump that means Mama is driving into the driveway. I yank my buckle off and run

into the house before Mama can see that Im missing that shoe.

When I get inside, I pull my itchy black dress over my head. Throw it on the ground. And I take

off the one shoe that I still have. I put it by the door where Daddy likes me to put my shoes. I spin so my

white and pink underdress twirls. Its nice to not be itchy anymore.

Mama catches up to me and walks in the door. She looks sleepy. She slips off her shoes on the

mat like she always does. She takes off her coat, but she lets it fall to the floor next to my dress. I stop

spinning. She never lets her coat touch the floor. It goes in the closet. She steps over it to me.Ellie, where did your dress go? she asks.

It was itchy.

She smiles, but only a little. I think we could use a nap. Its been a long day. Uncle Simon and

Aunt Mary are coming to stay with us later today, but not for a little while. Right now its just the two of

us. Do you want to take a nap with Mama, Ellie?


16/18

Brown 7

I nod but not cause Im sleepy. Mama needs a nap more than me.

Mama walks past me and grabs my hand. We go into the living room, and she sits down on the

couch I drew on. Smeared blue flowers.

We sit down, and Mama pulls a blanket over. She hugs me close, and we stay there for a fewminutes.

After while, I know shes asleep cause she isnt holding me as tight. I wiggle a little bit until I

fall out of her arms and onto the floor.

I let Mama stay there. Im not sleepy and I just want to go outside. I ha d to stay in all day at

church, and I just want to play on the swing in the backyard.

At preschool I have to wait in line forever before its my turn. And there are no cuts allowed,

even if someone says its okay. Someone else always gets mad and tattles. I like having my very own

swing outside. No one can tell me to get off except for Mama and Daddy. Its always my turn in mybackyard. No tattlers.

I tiptoe out of the room and push the glass door open to get into the backyard. My swing is at the

other end. I run. I jump into the seat on my stomach so I can fly through the air. There is a hill in the

backyard that the swing is on top of. Daddy always tells me to be careful on the hill because we live next

to a canyon, and he doesnt want me to fall and gethurt, even though theres a big fence to keep me safe.

When I lie on my stomach like this I can pretend Im an airplane flying over everything. I built a Lego

town to fly over and left it out in the rain once. It got all wet, but it was still my town. The swing pinches

me in the stomach. I dont care cause Im flying.I screech and yell. Outside everything is like it always is. Someones laughing with me. Daddy

once told me that was Ekko.

I shout out loud back to Ekko. She wants to play.

Hello! I shout.

Hello, she shouts back quieter.

I giggle, but Ekko doesnt. Are you sad? I ask. No one wants to laugh today.

Sad, she says.

I stop giggling. Ekko is sad like Mama. I wonder why and stop pumping the swing back andforth. But I still swing. Not as high as before. I lie on my stomach quietly. I cant hear Ekko anymore.

Where did she go? Where does she live?

When shes gone, I try to have fun swinging again, but everyone is sad, and I cant have fun

anymore. So I just dangle my legs and arms for awhile.


17/18

Brown 8

I hang in the air and I look down the hill. Someone is standing far away so I cant see their face.

They are wearing black like I was. I wonder who came back with us, and I know it must be Daddy. He

probably walked all the way from the church when Mama and I were in the car.

HI! I shout to him. Hes walking closer and closer, climbing the hill to come home.Hi! he shouts back at me. Im so happy that I start to swing again. I run on the ground until

theres no more ground, and Im in the air.

Look, Daddy, Im a plane! I say. I swing higher and higher.

A plane! he says. Hes excited too.

Yeah! A plane! I can fly!

Fly!

Ok. Watch, I can pretend that you are a town and I can fly by you. I push really hard once

more, but stop when I hear Daddy call back to me.Bye, you.

No, Daddy, dont go! Dont say bye!

But he says it again. Bye.

I jump from the swing and fall onto the sand. I scrape my knee and tear my tights in, but I dont

want Daddy to go. Not again.

Daddy, Daddy! Dont go!

Go, he shouts back at me as I chase him down the hill. The more I run to him the more he runs

away. Why does he want me to go?I trip again at the bottom of the hill and skin my other knee. My white tights are red at the knees

now and mud turned the bottom of my feet brown. My pretty white and pink underdress is torn and dirty.

I dont care. Daddy is running away from me, and hes not gonna turn around.

I look up from my knees. Daddy is gone, and I dont know where he went. But I know. Hes not

coming back.

I turn and run back up the hill. My hair gets in my face and I know my black bow fell out. It must

be at the bottom of the hill. But I dont want to go back to get it.

I dont want it I never wanted it.

I run until I get to the house and pull at the glass door until it opens, and I run over to the couch.

Mamas still sleeping. I wake her up, and she sees me and my torn dress and knees. She grabs me and

hugs me so that I cant see anything but the black of her dress. Is Daddy really not coming back,

Mama? I start to cry.

No, sweetie. Hes not.


18/18

Brown 9

I hug Mama tighter as she pulls the blanket around me. Im shivering but Im not sure ifits

cause Im cold. Mama rocks me back and forth like the swing until I fall asleep.

Date post:	06-Apr-2018
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Wynken, Blynken, And Nod Issue 4

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