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Doctor, Id like to talk to you and the Old Soldier, said the General, as the little
people were leaving the breakfast table. Just step into the library a minute.
I wonder whats the matter? thought the Dunce as he watched the tiny door shut
behind the three little men, and although he fairly strained his ear at the keyhole
he couldnt hear a single thing.Well, boys, said the General, when the three Teenie Weenies had made
themselves comfortable in the tiny chairs, I-I-I sort of wanted to talk to you
about Aliceabout my going to see her. I dont know just what would be the best
way to approach her. I have thought a great deal about the matter, but Id sort of
like to have your ideas on the subject.
You might make an appointment to meet her some place, suggested the Doctor.
Write her a note and ask her tomeet you.
I have thought of that, said the
General, but it is such a task to
write so big a letter. If she could
read regular Teenie Weenie writing
it wouldnt be so difficult.
You might leave a magnifyingglass handy, chuckled the Doctor.
Tilly Titter tells me that Alice
often sits by the bed room window in the morning, suggested the Old Soldier.
Why wouldnt it be a good idea to get Tilly to take you on her back and fly up
onto the window sill. If the child made an effort to catch you, why all youd have
to do would be to stick tight and Tilly would get you away in a jiffy.
Thats a fine scheme, isnt it, Doctor? cried the General.
Excellent! answered the little medical man.
Well sir, Ill do it, said the General. If I can get hold of Tilly, Ill go this
morning.
Luckily, Tilly happened to be discussing the scarcity of angle-worms with a
young robin nearby and the General at once told her of his plans.
Clever as soap suds! exclaimed the bird when she heard the Generals scheme.
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It was not far to the place where Alice lived and in a few minutes the bird settled
on a limb of a tree quite near the bed room window. Alice was sitting by the
window and after watching her for a few minutes, the General ordered Tilly to fly
to the sill. The child was playing with her doll and she did not notice the bird and
the General when they lighted on the window sill. The General did not speak for afew seconds, for he was somewhat nervous and he could feel Tilly quivering with
excitement under him, but soon he mustered up courage and spoke.
Good morning, Miss Alice, he said, lifting his hat in a most dignified manner.
The child looked up with a start and her lovely eyes nearly popped out of her head
when she saw the bird with the smiling General sitting on its back.
Hop right on my back.
Ill have to slick up a bit, said the
General. Ive got to wash my hands
and get a clean handkerchief first.
All right, old dandy, laughed Tilly as
the General hurried into the house,where he washed his face until it fairly
shone. When he had brushed his coat
and tucked the tiniest handkerchief into
his pocket he rejoined Tilly, who
squatted down so he could climb onto
her soft feathered back.
Good-bye, folks! shouted the
General, as the bird spread her wings
and sailed up into the air. Wish me
good luck.
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Crickety me! exclaimed Alice. Oh, I beg your pardon! Y-y-you g-g-gave me
such a start. Are you a Teenie Weenie?
Yes, Miss Alice, answered the General. I am the General and I have come to
see if we could do anything for you, but you must be very careful not to touch us,
for if you should pick up one of us, even if you did it ever so gently, we mighthave an arm or some ribs broken.
Oh yes, I understand and I promise to be ever so carefulcross my heart, and
the child made a cross with her dainty finger over her right breast.
Youve crossed over the wrong place, laughed the General. Your heart is on
the left side.
Oh yes, so it is, smiled Alice. Well, Ill uncross the right side and do it all over
on the proper place.
Is there anything we can do for you? asked the General.
Yes, sir, please come and play with me. ImIm so lonesome.
Well, said the General as he slid off Tillys back, we will be glad to come, but
there are a few conditions which you will have to understand first.
Tell me, cried the child. Ill do anything you say.
I believe you understand us and I think you will be very careful, but you see we
are so tiny it would take very little to injure us. I just want to impress you with the
idea, so you wont forget. I know you wouldnt intend to harm us, but you might
forget and drop some thing or accidentally step on us or something like that.
Oh, I wont forget. I will not! the child cried. Ill promise and promise and
promise to be careful always.
And you must not tell a soul about us, said the General, for they would want tosee us and we have to be very particular with whom we play.
I promise.
Are you afraid of mice? asked the General.
Oh no!
Or squirrels, or toads, said the General.
No indeed, they are all my friends. I love them all, cried the child.
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I am glad, said the General, for they are all our friends and
they sometimes go with us. They will want to come and see
you, too.
Oh, do bring them along! I would love to see them, said
Alice, clapping her hands. May I ask just how many Teenie
Weenies there are?
Twenty or more, answered the General.
And where do you live?
We live under a rose bush not far from here, said the
General. We have several houses in the village. There is
Shoehurst, where most of us live. Then Mrs. and Mr. Lover,
with the twins, live in a baby shoe bungalow, the Chinaman lives in an old teapot
where he does the laundry work for all of us. The Doctor lives in the hospital,which is made out of an old cigar box, and four of the girls live in a paper box and
its a lovely little home.
Oh, how cute! cried Alice. Could I, do you think, sometime see your little
village?
Maybe, answered the General. You will not be able to get very near, for the
village is directly under a huge rose bush, but you might be able to lie on the
ground and peer under it. You could see but very little though. I must go now, forsome one is coming, cried the General. I must hurry, and he leaped onto the
birds back.
No one is coming, said Alice. Miss Bett is in the garden. I dont hear
anything. But the tiny General felt the vibration of footsteps before the child
could hear the sound.
To-morrow morning, shouted the General. We will meet you to-morrow unless
it rainsat the foot of the old cherry tree, and the bird flew off the sill just as
Miss Betts glum face appeared at the door.
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Chapter 9
Well, whats the matter with you?
Why, I dont know, unlessunless I got a little excited over a bird that hopped
onto the window sill, said Alice. It was such a pretty little bird!
Pretty little pest! exploded Miss Bett. The nasty little wretches, they eat up all
my young lettuce and cherries and berries.
But, Miss Bett! exclaimed Alice. They destroy lots of bugs and worms that eat
the plants.
Nonsense, perfect nonsense, growled Miss Bett. Id like to kill every one of
them.
Why Miss Bett! Theyretheyre friends of the Tee Alice quickly put her
hand over her mouth, for she had almost forgotten her promise in standing up for
her new- made friends.
Fortunately Miss Bett failed to notice the slip and Alice hurried into the parlor
Alice stooped to pick up the doll,
which had dropped off her lap
during the talk with the General,
and as she did so, Miss Bett looked
at her sharply.Whats the matter with you, child?
Your cheeks are flushed, said Miss
Bett and, striding across the room,
she felt of the childs forehead.
You are hot and trembling like a
leaf. Are you sick?
No, Miss Bett.
Pick up that doll and put it in its place! I will nothave things scattered all over the houseit is most
untidy.
It is time for your hour of practice on the piano, said
Miss Bett, looking over the top of her glasses.
Yes, Miss Bett, answered Alice.
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where she drummed on the piano, but her
mind was far away and she learned very
little music that day.
All day long she thought of the Teenie
Weenies and it seemed to her the day would
never end. She lay in her bed that night with
wide open eyes, long after she
should have been asleep, thinking
of the little people, and when she
finally did fall asleep she dreamed
Miss Bett was chasing birds and
Teenie Weenies all over the house.
The first thing in the morning Alice
dressed herself and hurried down tothe kitchen where she heard Miss
Very well, young lady, she said,
and a very hard look came into her
dark eyes. You can stay home, butyou will stay right in this room, and
Alice heard her close the door and
turn the key in the lock.
It seemed to the child that she had
cried for hours, but really it was only
a few minutes later when she heard a
noise and raising her head she hearda tiny voice.
Can I help set the table? Alice asked.
No, answered Miss Bett. You would surely break some of the dishes. Run
along and get into your pink frock, for I am going to take you with me to the
market.
Please, Miss Bett, I would rather stay home.
What would the Teenie Weenies think of her? She had promised to meet them
that very morning at the foot of the old cherry tree. The child burst into tears and
fled to her room, where Miss Bett found her a half hour later, sobbing as though
her little heart would break.
Bett getting breakfast.
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Chapter 10
Alice glanced at the window, but it was as bare as Mrs.
Hubbards cupboard. She looked quickly all around the
room and then she saw a quaint little figure standing by
the door. He wore blue pants, stockings and shoes, a
yellow sweater and on his round little head, perched ata rakish angle, was a tall pointed cap.
Who are you? asked the surprised child and she
smiled through her tears.
Me? Why, Im the Dunce! The Teenie Weenie
Dunce, answered the little chap.
Oh lovely! exclaimed Alice. And where are the rest?
Where is the General? How did you get in?
Well, said the Dunce, I rolled through the crack under the door. The rest of the
gang are outside and the General is too fat to get through the crack, so the boys
are getting the key out of the lock and they will push it through the crack to you
and you can open the door and let the crowd in.
How in the world can such little people as you get up so high as the lock to getthe key? asked Alice.
Cowboy throws a rope over the knob, pulls himself up, lets the key down and
then slides down the rope himself, answered the Dunce promptly.
How did you know I was in this room? Alice asked.
Well, we saw the old crab, beg pardon, I mean Miss Bett, go out and you didnt
come to the cherry tree, so the General asked Tilly Titter to scout around and see
if she could find out what was the matter. Tilly flew to your window, saw youcrying, and reported it to the General.
Just as soon as the old crabI mean Miss Bettwent out, we came in. We
rolled under the kitchen door and then came on upstairs. Gosh, but it was a job
gettin the women and the Policeman up the stairs. Most of us can climb up all
right, but the Copper is so fat he cant make it, so we have to help him and the
women.
At that minute Alice saw a key slowly appear through the crack under the door.
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Theres the key, theres the key! she shouted, and
the Dunce caught hold of it and nearly strained his
tiny back pulling it through.
I dont suppose you could unlock the doorit would
be too much of a task for such little folks, said Alice,
after the Dunce had pulled the key into
the room.
I suppose we could, answered theDunce, mopping his head
with a tiny handkerchief.
But wed have to have a
lot of pulleys and
machinery and it would
be some job.Alice quickly picked up the key and, unlocking the door, she pulled it gently
open.
What a sight! There on the door sill stood the smiling Teenie Weenies.
The little women all made a pretty curtsey and the men lifted their hats and bowed
low.
Welcome, Teenie Weenies! cried Alice as she dropped a curtsey. I will sit hereon the floor and keep perfectly still and I would like to have you all gather around
me.
The General introduced each of the little people. Alice was much interested in the
Lady of Fashion. Gogo, the colored Teenie Weenie, drew the childs attention,
too, when he chased the Dunce around the room during a game of tag.
Goodness, Gogo, she cried, you certainly can run!
Gogos the fastest Teenie Weenie runner in the crowd. Ask him to tell you thestory of how he outran the arrow, said the General with a twinkle in his eye.
Alice could see from the amused expressions on the faces of the little folks
gathered about her that the story promised to be interesting, so she begged the
colored chap to tell it. It took considerable coaxing, but finally he consented and
Alice leaned forward, eager to hear every word.
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Well, began the littlecolored boy as he lookedup into Alices face highabove him, mah mothahdone send me in de forestone day fo to get a hickorynut fo dinnah. I waswalkin along when suddenlike Ah heah a noise. Whodat? Ah say, but nobodiesanswer and so Ah keep onwalkin.
Pretty soon Ah heahanother sound and Ah
done look ovah my shoulder and right behind a bunch ofmushrooms, Ah done see a couple of wild Teenie Weenie Indians.Quick as a hummin bird Ah done squat behind anothermushroom, fo dem Indians was carryin bows and arrows.
How terrible! exclaimed Alice.
Yas, mam, said Gogo. Ah was slightly indisturbed. Ah doneknow dem Indians was good shooters so Ah says to my self Ahsays, Gogo, yo all bettah done step around de corner fo dis is nohealthy place fo to be.
Well, Ah done crawl backwards like a crawfish done crawl and deIndians done crawl fowards like a crawfish can crawl when he aintcrawlin backwards, and we all done crawl like dat fo about ahour.
De Indians was all de time gettin nearer and nearer, so Ah madeup mah mind Ah had bettah shake a leg.
What does shake a leg mean? asked Alice.
Shake a leg means fo to kick a shoe, answered Gogo.
He means to run, said the General, who noticed the puzzledexpression on Alices face.
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Oh, how exciting! cried Alice,and she could hardly keepfrom laughing.
Jus as Ahdone start torun Ah saw
one of dem Indians jumpup and pull his bow fo toshoot a arrow, so Ahdone light fo home on astraight line. Aftah Ah
had run fo a little while Ah donelook around and Ah saw datarrow was gainin on me, so Ahsays to myself, Ah says, Gogo,yo suttenly have got to shake a
leg if yo all dont want dis arrowfo to ovahtake yo.
Yasm, answered Gogo, and he glanced about at the Teenie
Weenies, but not one of the little folks cracked a smile.Ah saw Ah was in fo some tall runnin so Ah just says to mahlegs, Ah says, Legs, if yo evah done expect fo to get me out of dispickle, yo suttenly have got to travel. In about a minute Ah wasleavin dat arrow way behind and in another minute Ah lookedback and Ah saw Ah had done run clean away from it. Hereswhere Ah takes a little rest, Ah says, so Ah done stop a minuteand befo Ah done stop a minute dat arrow done come along andplunks into me.
Oh dear! exclaimed Alice. Did it hurt you?
No mam, not much, answered Gogo. Yo see de arrow was prettywell tired out when it done reached me, so it only give me ascratch. Ah calls it an arrow escape.
My, but you must be a fast runner, Alice smiled.
Well, Ah can step lively when a arrow is followin me.
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Then you ad better step right livelynow, chirped Tilly Titter from thewindow sill. Miss Bett is coming.
Oh dear! exclaimed Alice.
Well have to be going, said the
General. When we get outside,please shut the door, lock it andthen push the key under the door.We will put it in the keyholeoutside.
Alice was greatly surprised howquickly the Teenie Weenies
disappeared. They seemed to fairlyfly through the doorway. She closed
the door, locked it and then pushed the key through the crackunder the door, just as the General directed. In a few seconds sheheard the rattle as the key was stuffed into the lock and then all
was silent. The Teenie Weenies had gone.
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During the next few days the Teenie Weenies saw very little ofAlice, although they managed to spend a few minutes with heronce in a while.
Why dont you bring Jem, the Mouse, to see me? asked Alice one
day when the General flew up to her window on the back of TillyTitter, the English sparrow. The Dunce tells me he is awfullyinteresting.
Yes, Jem is a nice mouse, answered the General. Ill ask him tocome with us when we visit you again.
If it is a nice day to-morrow, said Alice, I thought it would be funto have a sort of picnic under the cherry tree. I will bring out my
little stove and we will cook something good. What would you liketo have me cook?
Ill tell you what would be nice, said the General. You furnishthe flour and we will bring some nice strawberries.
And make a strawberry shortcake cried Alice, clapping her hands.
Yes, thats it, smiled the General.
After talking over the plans for the picnic for some time, theGeneral flew home and made the news known to the TeenieWeenies, who were tickled with the idea.
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The next morning Alice secured half a cup of flour, some sugar, herlittle stove, and some cooking, dishes which she carried out to the
cherry tree.
The Teenie Weenies were there waiting for her and with them wasJem, the Mouse, who was presented to Alice.
I am delighted to meet you, she said. I have heard a great dealabout you, too.
I hope you heard only the truth, cried the Mouse. Im a stickler
for the truth. Thats why I am against cheese it aint truthfultoo many holes in it to be honest.
Alice did not know whether to smile or not. It certainly was a funnyremark, but the little mouse said it so solemnly she dared notsmile.
Cats are dishonest, too, continued the Mouse. They always havea guilty look, just as though they had set fire to an orphan asylum,
or bombed a church. I stand on record as being against cats.The little Mouse looked so serious, Alice thought it best not todispute his remarks although she did not quite agree. Alice set upthe little stove, and Gogo, the Turk, the Old Soldier and the Duncegathered up firewood.
Where is your baking powder? asked the Cook, who had beenlooking over the various things Alice had brought.
Oh dear me! she exclaimed. I forgot to bring it along. We have
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Jem, said the General, will you go into the house and scoutaround and see if you can locate the baking powder?
With pleasure, answered the Mouse.
Just locate it and then a couple of the boys can go in and getsome, said the General as the mouse hurried away.
Jem was gone for the longest time and the Teenie Weenies weresomewhat worried over his absence, but presently he appearedwith the information that the baking powder stood on the secondshelf of the kitchen cup board.
What took you so long? asked the General.While I was looking for the baking powder, answered Jem, Ihappened to see a small box marked Rough on Rats. I washorrified at the mistake on the label, so I scratched off the R onrats, put in a C and made it read Rough on Cats.
Alice snickered right out loud, but before the Mouse could becomeoffended, the Dunce fell over a strawberry and every body laughed
at the foolish fellow.
got to have some and Im afraid to go into the house for fear MissBett will want to know what I am doing.
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Great grief! exploded theGeneral. That silly fellowis always falling intosomething. A couple of youfellows hike over there andfish him out.
The Cowboy and thePoliceman hurried awayand after a few minutesthey returned, carrying abundle of baking powderand followed by the Dunce,who was busily dusting the
baking powder out of his clothes.What were you trying to do, Dunce, powder your nose? laughedthe Cook.
Well, there wasnt much powder in the can and I had to crawl upon a pepper box and reach way down in the can to get the bakingpowder. My foot slipped and I fell in.
Well, if we havent enough baking powder to make the shortcake,all well have to do will be to dump the Dunce into the mix, saidthe General. There is enough on his clothes to bake a couple ofshortcakes.
I think you had better mix the dough, said Alice, addressing theCook. You know more about it than I do and Id love to watchyou.
All right, answered the Cook and he set to work mixing thedough.
Alice chuckled to herself and clapped her hands with delight asshe watched the tiny folks busying themselves with the work.
When the cakes were ready it took three of the little men to pushthem into the stove oven. The Old Soldier took charge of the fireand he stuffed a great many little sticks into the fire box before the
cakes were done.
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When the cakes were baked and taken out of the oven they werelaid on a piece of paper, where the Cook spread on the strawberrieswith one of Alices doll spoons.
Alice cut the cake into tiny pieces and all the Teenie Weenieshelped themselves. The cake was delicious and everyone ate until
they were filled, excepting Alice, who could have easily eaten thewhole cake, but she never said a word and politely pretended shehad plenty.
My, but that was good shortcake! Wasnt it, Jem? cried TillyTitter, who had been given a share.
Quite so, quite so, answered the Mouse. It was perfectly honestshortcakethere wasnt a single hole in it. Im set against anything
with holes all through it.How about a sieve, Jem? said the Old Soldier. Its full of holes.
Then its dishonest, snapped the Mouse. A sieve wont hold
anything, so therefore, like cheese, its dishonest.
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Hardly a day went by that a Teenie Weenie or most of the little people did not
visit Alice. It was quite plain to the tiny folks that Alice was not happy with Miss
Bett, so they spent as much time as possible with the child, for she seemed happy
when they were around. Sometimes the little folks would spend an hour or more
waiting for a chance to join Alice, for Miss Bett kept a mighty close eye on the
child, and of course the Teenie Weenies could not show themselves then.
That woman is always coming around, exploded Tess Guff one afternoon as she
and the Lady of Fashion sat under the violet bush in the Teenie Weenie front yard.
Yes, she is annoying, answered the Lady of Fashion, who was sewing on a tiny
under-garment. It seems as though every time I get settled for a little chat with
Alice, she has to come along.
Why dont you go over about two oclock in the afternoon? chirped Tilly Titter,
the English sparrow, who was sitting on the limb of a bush near by. Jem, the
Mouse, tells me Miss Bett usually takes a nap then. Jem knows what es talkin
about for es always snoopin around to see what crumbs e can find and e
knows that ouse like a mouse trap.
Weve got time to get over there now, cried the Lady of Fashion, glancing at
her tiny wrist watch, which was about as big as the head of a pin.
Miss Bett will be taking her nap and we can take our sewing along and have a
Chapter 14
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Thank you, Jem, said the Lady of Fashion. Which is the best way to get in the
house?
The side door, by all means! cried the Mouse. Theres a hole under the screen
door big enough to roll a pineapple cheese through.
The little ladies found the hole under the door and in a few minutes they stepped
into the dining room. Alice sat at the table reading a book and the Lady ofFashion had to cough several times before she could get the childs attention.
Oh, lovely! cried Alice. I am so glad you have come.
We thought wed bring over our sewing and gossip a bit, said Tess.
If you will put your hand down on the floor we can get on and you can lift us up
onto the table, said the Lady of Fashion. But you must move slowly so we
wont tumble off.
Alice spread out her hand on the floor and when the three little women hadclimbed on she lifted them up to the table.
Ill get something for you to sit on, Alice said, as she, ran out of the room.
Presently she returned with several things in her hand.
Im sorry I cant offer better seats, she said, but I have only this one toy chair
that is small enough to be comfort able, but I brought this piece of rubber eraser
and this match box, so at least you will have something to sit on.
She arranged them on the table and the little women sat down and took out theirsewing.
real nice chat with Alice.
Ill run over and see if Mrs. Lover wont go, too,
cried Tess, and she dashed off towards the Lovers tiny
baby shoe bungalow.
Now, Mrs. Lover was mighty fond of a chance to
gossip and it only took her a few seconds to slip on aclean dress, snatch up her peanut shell work basket and
join the party.
The three little women were fortunate in meeting Jem
as they drew near the Bett house and the Mouse
informed them that Miss Bett was taking her nap.
Miss Alice is in the dining room, said the Mouse.
The old crab, beg pardon, I mean Miss Bett, never
wants the child outdoors when she naps.
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I wish you would tell Grandpa to come over sometime, said Alice. She was
lying on the grass under the old cherry tree, talking to the Dunce who leaned
against the tree.
I have known you Teenie Weenies for some time now and I havent seen
Grandpa.He doesnt get around much now, answered the Dunce. You see, hes pretty
well crippled up with the rheumatism and its hard to get him out of the house.
Well, tell him I would love to see him and hear some of his stories.
Jinks! exclaimed the Dunce with a grin. Youd soon get tired of his yarns. Ill
see if I cant get him to come over some dayhe can hire a mouse and ride over.
Oh, Id love to see him ride a mouse! laughed Alice.Alices slightest wish was law to the Teenie Weenies and after some argument the
Dunce finally got Grandpas promise to visit Alice.
One morning the Dunce saddled Jem, the Mouse, and with the help of the Turk
and the Sailor they boosted the old gentleman into the saddle and set off for Miss
Betts house. They found Alice in the garden and the child was much pleased by
the visit.
Its perfectly lovely of you to make the long trip over here to see me, she said.
Chapter 15
The Teenie Weenies lifted the
old fellow off the Mouse and
rolled a hickory nut up for him to
sit on.
The pleasure is all mine, Miss,
answered the old gentleman,
lifting his funny old-fashioned
hat.
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This hickory nut sort of gives me the jim jams,
grunted Grandpa, as he sat down on it.
Hows that? asked Alice, looking very serious,
although she could hardly keep from smiling, for the
old man was dressed in a heavy overcoat and mittens
and he wore felt boots, and the day was frightfully
warm.
Well, began the old fellow, I was huntin
caterpillar furs in the autumn of fifty-two. It was on
the twenty-eighth of October and I was makin for my
camp up near the creek. It was gettin pretty late and I
was anxious to make camp before night set in, so I took a short cut through a
grove of hickory nut trees. It was takin a chance, for we Teenie Weenies have to
be mighty careful the nuts dont fall on us and we usually keep away from nuttrees during the Fall. I figured Id rather take the chance of a nut hittin me than to
get caught in the dark goin around them, so I took the short cut and started
through. Well sir, I mean Miss, I hadnt gone far before I heard a nut crashin
down through the leaves right over my head. I dodged it all right, but the blamed
thing hit a stone and bounced right at me. It struck me on the leg and snapped the
bone like a piece of chalk.
Oh, you poor thing! gasped Alice.
Well sir, I mean Miss, continued Grandpa, I certainly was in a bad fix. There I
was, miles from home in the deep forest and with a broken leg. It hurt like sixty,
but I man aged to drag myself to the creek where I found a stick lyin on the
shore. I pushed the stick into the water and climbed on. I knew I had to find a
doctor as soon as possible and I knew that if I floated down the creek far enough
Id find help. I was pretty scared, too, for I could hear the frogs croakin on both
sides of the creek and I didnt know just when one of em might take it into his
fool head to grab me off for supper.Oh, mercy! breathed Alice.
Pretty soon it got so dark you couldnt see your nose and every once in a while
the stick I was floatin on would bang up against a stone or somethin and nearly
knock me off. Well sir, I mean Miss, I must have floated for a couple of hours and
pretty soon I saw a light ahead. You can just bet your last grape seed I began to
holler like a mouse that had been eatin Paris Green. The fellows who were
campin where the light was heard my cries for help and they put out in a pea podcanoe and took me off the stick.
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What a terrible experience! cried Alice.
Well, it wasnt exactly a pleasant time, said the old gentleman, but it was a
heap better than the time I spent the winter in a tomato can.
Oh, tell me about that! exclaimed Alice, but Grandpa never had a chance to tell
the story, for Miss Bett came out of the house and the Teenie Weenies wereforced to leave.
Jem, the Mouse, had gone to sleep while Grandpa was talking and the Teenie
Weenies could not awaken him.
They pinched, shook him, pulled his whiskers, yelled cats and did everything they
could think of. Finally they had to catch him by the tail and drag him into hiding.
Alice laughed until the tears rolled down her cheeks. She thought she had neverseen anything half so funny as the sleeping mouse being dragged off by his tail.
What are you laughing at, child? demanded Miss Bett, as she walked up to the
place where Alice sat.
Oh, I just saw the funniest mouse, laughed Alice.
Mouse! cried Miss Bett. I hate mice! And picking up her skirts she ran
towards the house.
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General, shouted the Dunce, running up
to the shoe house porch where the General
sat writing in his tiny account book, Alice
wants to see you. She is in trouble of some
sort and she asked me to tell you to come
at once.
All right, answered the General. See if
Tilly Titter is about and ask her if she will
carry me over on her back.
The Dunce set out in search of the
sparrow, while the General carried his tiny book into the house and put on his coat
and hat.The Dunce found Tilly in an argument with Gogo and the Cook. The three were
discussing the great value of craw fish meat over that of snail meat.
The General wants you to carry him over to see Alice, bellowed the Dunce at
the top of his voice.
Not so loud, Dunce. Youre liable to strain your voice. You dont need to yell so
loudI ave perfectly good ears, said Tilly, and she flew to the shoe house
where the General stood waiting for her.To the Bett house, said the General, and he hopped onto Tillys back in one
jump.
It only took a very few seconds to reach the Bett house by bird back. The General
found Alice searching the grass near the cherry tree.
Here I am, said the General, as Tilly landed on the lowest branch of a bush
nearby.
Oh, General! exclaimed Alice. Im in a pretty mess. I have lost Miss Betts
glasses. I brought them out to put on my dollthey were lying right on this table
when I went into the house to bring out some more of my doll furniture. I was
gone only a moment and when I looked for them they were gone.
One thing I am sure of, said the General. None of the Teenie Weenies would
have taken them.
Oh dear me, NO! exclaimed Alice. Its awfully strange, for I was gone only a
second or so. I would have seen anyone, that is a big person, if they had taken
Chapter 16
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The little folks were all greatly
excited and they hurried to
Alices aid as fast as their legs
would carry them.
When they arrived, Alice told
the story of the lost glasses all
over again and the Policeman
asked many questions.
Its a mighty strange thing,
said the little fellow, shaking
his tiny head in a most solemn
way. It looks like there had
been a mystery committed
here. Yes sir, a mystery.
them.
Were there any squirrels or birds around? asked the General.
Not that I remember, answered Alice.
Mighty strange, said the General. Ill get all the Teenie Weenies out on the
search and well see if we cant find them.
Oh, thank you, General. I knew you would help me. I dont know what Miss Bett
will do to me if I dont find them. They are her reading glasses and she will want
them this evening when she gets the evening paper. I only meant to play with
them for a little while and I was going to put them right back on the mantel.
Now dont worry, said the General. Well do every thing we can to find them.
I know you will and I think its awfully nice of you, said Alice.
Tilly! shouted the General to the sparrow, who sat on a limb of the bush besidethe cherry tree. Fly to the shoe house and tell the Policeman to get every Teenie
Weenie that can be spared and come over here immediately.
All right, sir, answered the bird, and she flew off towards the shoe house at her
greatest speed.
Tilly found the Policeman in the teapot laundry drinking tea with the Chinaman
and she quickly gave the little officer the Generals message.
Ill get the men together and start immediately, said the Policeman.
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The Teenie Weenies spread out over the yard and they searched with the greatest
care for the lost glasses. They looked into every hole, box, bucket, and even
peered into empty tomato cans. The Dunce wiggled into an old black bottle in
search of the glasses and he grew very angry when the Turk laughed at him for it.
You poor goof! roared the Turk, fairly rolling on the ground with laughter.How in the name of catfish do you expect those glasses to get into that bottle?
Im not overlooking any possible hiding place, answered the Dunce in a most
superior manner.
I should say you were not, grinned the Turk. But will you please tell me how
you expect such a large thing as a pair of glasses to get through the neck of that
little bottle?
The Dunce was quite peeved and turning on his heel walked away with his chinhigh in the air.
The Indian was clever at finding trails, so he was asked by the General to examine
very carefully the ground around the table where the glasses had been last seen.
The little fellow searched all about the place, but not one track could be seen.
This is certainly a mighty strange thing, said the General. If a squirrel, a rat, or
a cat, or dog or a person had carried off the glasses they surely would have left
tracks be hind them.
Chapter 17
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It seems to me that an animal would not
be likely to carry the glasses away,
remarked the Doctor. They would have
no use for them.
Maybe a chickie eat em up, suggested
the Chinaman.
Hardly, answered the General, with a
twinkle in his eye.
Well, allie same me see chickie rooster
eat a piece of glassie once, protested the
Chinaman.
Yes, a chicken would eat a small piece
Why dont you ask Jems
opinion? whispered Tilly.
Jem, said the General,
turning towards the mouse
who was leaning on a twigstaff at the edge of the crowd,
have you any suggestions as
to the whereabouts of the
glasses?
Probably! Probably! said
the mouse.
Well, if you will be so kindas to give us your ideas in
Might have been a Duck what take de specks, suggested Gogo. Ah done seen a
duck swaller a glass marble once.
You mean you saw a duck swallow a marble, corrected the Lady of Fashion,
who was most particular about grammar and always corrected Gogo.
Tilly Titter, who had been sitting near-by listening to the talk, flew down and
motioned the General aside.
of glass, but they would not touch a piece as big as the lens of an eye glass, saidthe Doctor. You see, chickens need bits of stones and glass to help grind up their
food, but they seldom ever eat a piece much larger than a grain of wheat.
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