N o t M a t t P a x t o n
• Mike Kelleher
• Worked with Matt
cleaning out
hoards and estates
for last 5 years
• Pop Culture and
Antique Expert
• Lead star of
Legacy List with
Matt Paxton
• How I got into this work?
•We work with 2 types of clients
– HOARDERS
– Downsizing Seniors (just have decades of stuff)
•Goals
– Help gain a general understanding of people affected by
hoarding
– Showcase our new show and how we are introducing
downsizing to the US
W H A T T O E X P E C T T O D A Y
U N D E R S T A N D I N G
H O A R D I N G
W H A T I S H O A R D I N G ?
Hoarding is a mental disorder marked by an
obsessive desire to acquire a significant amount
of possessions.
Something bad has happened and they are
looking for their happiness and self-worth in stuff.
There is ALWAYS a reason.
• Grief causes hoarding
• But time allows for MORE
grief
• As our population grows
and downsizes, we will see 2
of the largest generations
transfer STUFF and WEALTH
•What’s holding your clients
back from moving in?
I S H O A R D I N G H E R E T O S T A Y ?
Generations & their Stuff
•Some people hoard items for survival
or pure emotion
•Others hoard items simply to fulfill an
impulse to purchase
• 50% Male/Female
• Not just the elderly
• Incredibly intelligent
• Careers
– Teachers, Nurses & Social Workers
• They are NOT lazy, crazy or sloppy
• There is always a trigger
– Grief, divorce, abuse, empty home, accident or loss of job
• They are looking for self-worth & happiness
• Self worth & happiness– Positive (faith, volunteering, exercise, etc)
– Negative (drugs, alcohol, beanie babies, etc)
•We can hide our secrets
•We believe we are “going to get to it…”
•We avoid the “NOW”
•We hold onto the past– Why do we hold on
•We think things were better…
H O W W E A R E A L I K E
H O W T O P R O P E R L Y
C O M M U N I C A T E
PERCEPTION
The hoarder thinks: • You don’t like them.
• The family doesn’t like them.
• Their hoarding is still a secret.
How you combat this:•Communication
• Front door communications:• Stand in the right place
• Invite them to come outside
• 5 min conversation
• Wait to be INVITED inside
• Word choice:• “This isn’t so bad. I’ve seen a lot worse.”
• What if this is the worst thing you’ve
ever seen?
• “…but I wouldn’t want my mom to live
like this.”
COMMUNICATIONS – FRONT DOOR
COMMUNICATIONS – WALK-THROUGH
Word Choice - Walking
through the door:
• Have the client lead you through
the home
• If you get into a dangerous situation
and you need to get on safety
gear, say:
•“Insurance mandates I have to
wear gear when I walk through
your house.”
• Acknowledge that you might be
the first person in that home in 10
years
•Ask questions to learn more, but
keep it vague:
– “Tell me about ________.”
•Ask permission for everything:
– Over-exaggerate (can I put my
hand here, can I put my foot
here)
•Give compliments when they are
real:
– “nice china…”
– “beautiful paintings”
COMMUNICATIONS – WALK-THROUGH
U N D E R S T A N D I N G
H O A R D I N G
Legacy List with Matt Paxton
• Our goal was to make a positive show about aging
seniors and their experiences downsizing.
• Every cable channel passed on it, except for Public
Television.
• We start airing in January 2020
• Matt will have a new Downsizing Q&A radio show on
NPR starting in January 2020
• What is a Legacy List?
Let’s take a look!
HOARDING Or DOWNSIZING
What did we learn?
• It’s never about the stuff
• It’s about the personal
and emotional stories
and people attached to
those items
• Take the time to
communicate and listen
to the stories
• Lead with compassion &
respect
Overwhelmed by stuff?
• Q&A
• We can Help
• For resources and tips go to
www.IamMattPaxton.com
• 804-502-2690
Let’s take a look!
