Faith plays an important rolein many people's lives, perhapseven more so when it comes timeto celebrate a wedding. However,couples who do not share thesame faith may have to makesome compromises.
Although romantic feelingsmay transcend faith, heritageand other factors that make peo-ple so different, individuals whoare quite religious often find thatthere are some challenges to get-ting married to someone outsidetheir own faith.
Depending on the faith, somereligions will not honor a wed-ding that does not conform totheir strict guidelines for a wed-ding within the faith.Oftentimes, this means that bothparticipants need to have beenraised according to the faith,including meeting certain reli-gious milestones throughouttheir lives. For example,Catholics must have been bap-tised, received communion andbeen confirmed under the aus-pices of the Catholic churchbefore being allowed to marry.They must present official cer-tificates of these sacraments inorder to receive a religiousCatholic wedding.
Those of the Jewish faith maybelieve in a "bashert," a beliefthat everyone has a soul mate.According to the Talmud, 40 daysbefore a male child is conceived a
voice from heaven announceswhose daughter he is going tomarry. In Yiddish, this perfectmatch is called "bashert," a wordmeaning fate or destiny. Thebashert is typically one who isalso Jewish.
To handle the intricacies of aninterfaith marriage, it is wise tospeak to clergy in your respectivereligions to see what will berequired of you as a couple.There could be workarounds,depending on what the coupledecide.
Some couples feel it is in theirbest interest if either one of them
converts to the other's religion sothat the ceremony is easier.Others choose to hold two dis-tinct religious ceremonies if theofficiants are lenient in theirrules to allow it to happen. Inother cases, couples feel it is bet-ter to have a non-denomination-al wedding to avoid any obsta-cles. Even though this ceremonywill not be sanctioned by eitherchurch, the couple can stillchoose to include prayers andcustoms specific to their faiths inthe ceremony.
Many couples decide thattheir mutual love and happinessis reason enough for an inter-faith wedding, even if thatmeans sacrificing acceptance bytheir clergy and church.Interfaith couples should beginwedding planning early to dis-cover what will be expected ofthem to have the wedding theydesire.
(ARA) - Getting married is adream. Who hasn't fantasizedabout the dress, the jewelry, yourdad walking you down the aisle,the music, the cake, the recep-tion following the ceremony?
Because people travel somuch these days, weddingsaren't always local any more.Destination weddings on thebeaches of Hawaii or theBahamas, or in a castle inScotland or even in a 900-year-old bed and breakfast in Irelandare extremely popular, which canmake planning a bit more diffi-cult due to the distance. Oftencouples are not able to travel tothe wedding location prior to theceremony to get everythingorganized, and rely on telephoneand email conversations.
Not being able to directlyinteract face to face with wed-ding organizers at the churchand reception hall, and vendorswho will be handling the cake,photos and flowers, to name afew, can make planning a bitmore of a challenge.
Wedding dreams can turninto nightmares well before thewedding - your wedding dressshop, the caterer or even thevenue goes out of business - orthe day of - a tornado strikes thechurch where the wedding wasto be held. But sometimes thenightmares end up to beextremely funny stories that willbe retold time and time again -and they can happen whetherthe wedding is taking place local-ly, or halfway across the country.
Stories like the bride, whoshortly before the wedding, dis-
covered her brother thought herdress needed a bit of extra color,and took his finger paints to thebeautiful white fabric. Or the catthat decided to give birth - nes-tled into the folds of the bride'swedding gown.
"Wedding disasters occur on adaily basis," says Robert Nuccio,president of R.V. Nuccio &Associates, Inc., the exclusiveprogram manager of theFireman's Fund wedding insur-ance program in the U.S."Weather, vendors going out ofbusiness, the father of the bridenot being able to attend due tosudden illness - you name it, it'shappened. You can't plan forthese disasters. But you can havea plan B."
Under one policy throughWedsure.com, a division of R.V.Nuccio and Associates, couplescan pick and choose al a carte upto nine wedding insurance cover-age options they want and mayneed. In addition to cancellationand additional expense, the cov-erage options also include gifts,jewelry, loss of deposits, photo-graphs and video, professionalcounseling, rented property, spe-cial attire and personal liabilityand medical payments.
Weather is the biggest offend-er causing wedding cancella-tions. If a hurricane, snowstorm,ice storm, tornado or airport clo-sure forces you to move or post-pone your destination or travelwedding, Wedsure.com weddinginsurance pays all the nonre-
fundable expenses you incur,including the honeymoon.
Having a plan B can save youplenty of ups and downs on theemotional roller coaster if some-thing turns your dream weddinginto a nightmare. For example, ifthe wedding gifts were to bestolen from the reception, wed-ding insurance can help protectyou from experiencing grief.
"If the photographer fails toappear, or he does show up andtakes pictures but is nowhere tobe found several weeks laterwhen you want your weddingphoto proofs, the policy will payto restage the wedding," saysNuccio, who is the author of thepolicy. "This includes flyingeveryone back, putting them upin hotels, feeding them, redress-ing them, rebuying the cake,rebuying the flowers, rerentingthe facility, rehiring a photogra-pher and flying everyone home.Basically photographs and videocoverage will pay to recreate theentire fairytale just for the pho-tographs."
Planning a wedding takes alot of time and energy, especiallywhen you and many members ofthe family have to travel for theevent. While a disaster could dis-rupt the dream event, it doesn'thave to cause you financial dev-astation. Be prepared with aplan B and anticipate that thisspecial time of your life will pro-ceed just like it did in your child-hood dreams.
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DEE-ANN DURBINAssociated Press Writer
When Prince William gave his newbride, Kate, a brief kiss on the balcony ofBuckingham Palace last spring, thecrowd of thousands wasn't satisfied.
"Kiss again!" they chanted. When thetwo shared a slightly longer kiss,onlookers erupted in cheers.
Few other wedding kisses will everbe subjected to so much scrutiny. Butthere's a lesson here: People love thewedding kiss, and they have definiteopinions about how a couple should sealthe deal. Some want passion; somedon't. Some like staged moments; otherswant to keep things natural. Everyonewants the kiss to be heartfelt.
"There are extreme thoughts aboutthe kiss," said Kristin Koch, a senioreditor at the wedding Web siteTheKnot.com. "Some people think it'stoo public and they don't want to do toomuch. Others think, 'This is your bigdeclaration of love!'"
Here are some tips to make The Kisscheer-worthy instead of cringe-worthy:
• Talk about it.You talk through everything else
about the wedding, from the guest list tothe bridesmaids' dresses. You and yourpartner should talk about what kind ofkiss you want to share, or even whetheryou want to share one at all. Chattingbeforehand can help things go moresmoothly on the big day.
Chelsea Kopperud, 26, who is plan-ning a wedding for next June in herhometown of Rushford, Minn., said herparents weren't comfortable kissing infront of everyone when they got mar-ried, so they waited and kissed at theback of the church. But Kopperud andher fiance, Jeffrey O'Donnell, do plan tokiss at the end of the ceremony, andthey've already agreed on what the kissshould look like: classy and loving.
"We agree that it shouldn't be just aquick peck, we want it to be more inti-mate than that. It is our first kiss as Mr.and Mrs.," said Kopperud, who coordi-nates accounts for an industrial supplycompany. "I would guess it will probablybe about five seconds long."
• Practice.It sounds silly. After all, most couples
have a lot of practice kissing. But youmight want to put in a little practicetime, especially if you're doing some-thing you're not used to, like having thegroom dip the bride.
Hope Bourgeault, 21, a social workstudent at the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, says she and her fiance, JeffBetterman, are planning to do a dip attheir wedding next August. They'realready practicing so it won't look awk-ward.
"I could imagine without some prac-tice he'd either drop me from beingnervous or else I'd bend a certain way to
dip and he'd think I was leaning theother way and it would just be a mess,"she said.
• Or don't practice.Some people insist that the kiss
should be natural, and that you shoulddo whatever you feel is right at thatmoment. Andrea Fassacesia, a NewYorker who's getting married in April,said she and her fiance have decided to"wing it."
"A rehearsed kiss looks rehearsed,"she said. "It should be natural, intimateand romantic. And, while it's in front ofhundreds of people, it should just feellike the two of you."
An informal poll of members of TheKnot found that just a third of the 71respondents planned to practice thekiss. Most — 61 percent — said they'llgo with whatever they're feeling at themoment.
• Do something you're both com-fortable with.
Don't plan a dip or any other acro-batics if you're not sure you want to gothrough with it. Koch said grooms oftenfeel more pressure than brides aboutthe kiss, since tradition dictates that it'ssomething the groom initiates. Kochsays you should remember that you mayalready be nervous when you're on thealtar, and you don't need the added pres-sure of a fantastic kiss.
• Don't be gross.Just about everyone agrees that
extra-long, over-the-top displays ofaffection are a no-no. They can lookforced and make guests squirm.Remember Al Gore's long, sloppy kiss
with Tipper at the 2000 DemocraticNational Convention?
"Have fun with it, be true to you, buta huge make-out or a tongue kiss is justnot appropriate, especially if grandmaand grandpa are watching," Koch said.
Tips For A Great Wedding Kiss
Help Make Your Dreams AReality With Wedding Insurance
Navigating An Interfaith Wedding
Come & See Us AtThe Wedding Planner
& Bridal Fest...Sunday, Jan. 29th
