Welcome! The Power of the Spoken Word
University of Industrial Distribution
March 11, 2013
Stephen D. Boyd
Welcome!
The difference between the right word, and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.
~ Mark Twain
The greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished.
~ George Bernard Shaw
Intrapersonal Communication:communication with self
Call on your technical skills when dealing with things and your interpersonal skills when
dealing with people.
Communication Choices
Information to all: Email Personal: In person or phone Confidential: In person
Small talk at the beginning is really not small talk.
Perception: the way we view the world around us
Learn to perceive more accurately:
Do a perception check. Be aware of perceptions people have of
you.
Interpersonal Communication Tips
Understanding precedes persuasion
Serendipity: an unplanned connection between two people
Positive Words
Use “I” statements Use “and” instead of “but” “I’ll be glad to” instead of “I have to”
Meaning is in the
PERSON
not the
WORD
FALSE ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT WORDS
That a word has only one meaning
That a word has the same meaning that it had years ago
That we are giving enough information
C.O.I.K. FALLACY
(Clear Only If Known)
Learn to listen more effectively.
From Listening Comes Wisdom
&
From Speaking Repentance.
Chinese Fortune Cookie
Fake attentionInterrupting the speakerRespond to the wrong thingDistractionsAvoid difficult materialDaydreamingSuperiority complexUninteresting subject matter
TORTOISE-HARE COMPLEX
Tortoise talkers —
Speak 150 WPM
Hare listeners —
Think 500 WPM
Use the thought/speech ratio to concentrate
Ask yourself, “What is the point?” Review what has been said Look for nonverbal cues Don’t be doing other things as you listen Pay attention
Tips for attentiveness
“Be present when you are present.” Be physically alert. Collect your thoughts before listening. “I will learn something new.”
APATHY:lack of feeling, interest, or concern
EMPATHY:putting yourself in another person’s position, but with separateness
SYMPATHY:an overinvolvement in the emotion of another
Encourage the person to talk
Give the speaker space Be pleasant Use the pause
The more we know about context, the better we can
empathize.
A EF HI KLMN T VWXY
BCD G J OPQRS U
Which line would the “Z” go on?
Give others the right to their feelings.
Recognize the significance of the situation.
Focus on the “here and now,” not the “then and there.”
Don’t give advice.
Don’t “rain on the speaker’s parade.”
“Wow, that must be rough.”
“I think I’ve felt that way, too.”
“Looks like that really made your day.”
“This means a lot to you, doesn’t it?”
“I can see you feel strongly about that issue.”
“I can only imagine how you feel.”
Paraphrase
“Sounds like you are telling me…” “In other words…” “So what you are saying…”
Learn to ask skillful questions.
Ears look like question marks. When you really listen, you ask questions.
~ Barry Lane
The person who talks the most dominates the conversation. The person who asks the questions controls the conversation.
Get information before you give information
Closed questions have a “yes” or “no” answer or some other brief
response.
A man is alone writing. There is a power failure and he dies.
Open questions begin with “What,” “How,” or “Why.”
Some answers are two or three questions deep
Three powerful words in questioning
Feel Think In your opinion
Competitive Edge
Important information is often 2-3 questions deep
Ask one more question Know the perception of your customer
about you Rehearse important conversations Be ready with an example
People buy on emotion and justify with logic.
It is better to tell a lot about a little than it is a little about a lot.
Lou Heckler
An experienced speaker is audience-centered; the novice
speaker is self-centered.
Differences in Audiences: 2000 to 2012
Audiences expect more from the speaker Audiences “bring the office” with them to
their seats Attention more difficult to control Control “mental surfing” the audience is
used to doing
I Am Sold Myself
“Which way did it go?”
“I knew I shouldn’t have had that second helping.”
“Don't move! It’s crawling up your leg!”
If a person takes off sunglasses, I can hear better.
Gestures
Describe and reinforceAway from the faceToward the audienceDon’t confuse energy with frenzy!Onomatopoeia with your body
That is the ugliest dog I have ever seen.
I never said I stole money.
Speak where you are equal distance from most members of
your audience.
Speak with Confidence
Practice 3 times
Practice
Walk through
Drive through
Fly through
Speak with Confidence
Practice 3 times Use purposeful movement early Have a “wow” factor every 10 minutes Have a positive attitude about your speech
and your audience
Speak with Confidence (cont’d)
Open with “good stuff” Be mentally alert by careful planning Become familiar with your speaking space
Use deductive method
Go from general to specific—state your conclusions first
Minimal structure required: point and support
Assert your ideas Value of “3s”
The Rule of Three:
The human mind is strongly attracted to things that come in “three’s.”
This principle calls for a speaker to say something in groups of three: three items, three points, three whatever.
3
3
33
3
33
Introduction
Body
Conclusion
Kinds of Transitions
1.Signposts — usually numbers
2.Internal summaries
3.Interjections — devices to draw attention to an idea
Save the best until last.
Move to action: “What I want you to do as a result of my
presentation is…”
Exit line: helps the speaker earn the right to sit down
Quotation
Testimonial
Tie back to opening
Increase YourPower of Persuasion
Let your confidence show
Feel good about your appearance Know your audience Develop your uniqueness Choose material you believe in Be willing to adjust as you speak
To Be Persuasive, General Statements Should Be Followed With:
Examples: Stories/case studies to illustrate point
Testimony: Opinion statements of experts who agree with your point
Statistics: Recent numbers that support your views
Special persuasive techniques
Show how what you advocate works elsewhere
Use recent material Use variety in evidence Meet objections up front Less required for readily accepted ideas
Use emotional appeals as well as logical appeals
Learn to tell your own story. Be a student of your own life.
Criteria for telling the story
Be specific Be personal Maintain a sense of direction Use animation Include dialogue when appropriate
That which holds attention determines action.
~ William James
Just because you can does not mean you should.
A presentation is not an essay on its hind legs.
Norwood Brigance
So…write for the eye, but speak for the ear!
Oral Style
More informal Shorter sentences More repetition
Echo words
She was well known but not known well.
If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.
Stephen Stills
Alliteration
“…not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their
character.”
I quote others only the better to express myself.
Michel de Montaigne
Handling the Question and Answer Period
• Let the audience know up front• Start with “What questions do you have?”• Consider repeating• Avoid “loaded” questions
Handling the Question and Answer Period (cont’d)
• Make your answer concise• “I don’t know” is an appropriate response• Give everyone a chance• Make eye contact with everyone• Better at the end with limited time• Don’t evaluate questions
Potpourri for Presentations
What should you do if…
Someone interrupts you with a question? A tornado warning sounds during your
speech? Your speech is supposed to follow a 10-
minute video, but the DVD doesn’t work? Someone is mowing the lawn outside the
window? Bad news precedes your speech?