How to Identify Your
Values
(And why you should).
Rob ArcherC. Psychol
Contents:•Values Definition – slide 3
•Why Bother with Values? – slide 4
•The Epitaph Exercise – slide 5
•Identifying Values from Your Epitaph – slides 6-7
•Checklist! – slides 8
•Life Values Exercise (work, growth, leisure, relationships) – slides 9-13
• Values-directed actions: work values• Values-directed actions: relationships
values• Values-directed actions: leisure values• Values-directed actions: growth values
Values definition• What do you want your life to be about?
• Values are the things that are most important to you. Acting in accordance with one’s values feels good, and acting against them tends to bring guilt.
• However, values are not emotions. ‘Feeling good’ is not enough; a deep seated belief that ‘this is the real me’ is closer to it.
• Values can be thought of as preferences. For example, I could say that I prefer it when I experience ‘achievement’ and ‘creativity’ in my work.
• But your ‘core’ values are priority preferences. For example, if ‘health’ is my priority value, I’ll be likely to try and keep fit and eat well. But if it’s 12th on my list, I’ll be far less likely to do that.
• Values are therefore defined by Bloom as priorities x preferences.
Why bother with values?
• Values are like life’s compass - if you don’t think about where you want to go in life, you run the risk of not getting there.
• This isn’t about airy fairy dreaming – it’s about conscious living. By having a strong sense of self and of purpose, we are better able to recall our most valued directions at critical moments of our lives.
• In practical terms this means that if we know our values and keep them top of mind, we’ll be more likely to act in accordance with them.
• If you don’t know what’s important you’ll probably become what others want you to be. This may provide rewards but you may pay a high a price...your life!
• Therefore if there is no ‘self’ in your decisions there will be little meaning in them and you run the risk of your life drifting away, in directions you don’t really want to go.
• Defining your values allows you to stop drifting through life and start navigating. Surely, life’s too short to live unconsciously?
How to do it1.Start off with your name and a manner of death you’d be happy with (if you see what we mean..!)
2.Reference a list of your main accomplishments – and what you were most proud of
3.List the people you will be leaving behind, and those who will miss you the most.
4.Identify what it is they will miss about you, and what they really valued about you.
5.Mention the people you helped
6.Identify the main questions that life asked you, and how you responded.
7.Write it in a style that reflects the type of person you were – let go! After all, you’re already dead!
Exercise: Write Your Own EpitaphValues are what you want your life to stand for. Funnily enough, we find that thinking about your death is a good way of bringing your life into perspective. This exercise will help you think about this.
Here Lies...Name …
Born in...Start typing here…
Make a note of the values you identified from the epitaph exercise in this
space e.g. Freedom, courage, respect.
(If you struggle to identify a value ask yourself: what is
this in the service of?)
Checklist!
1. Is this value authentic?A value doesn’t feel like a ‘should’, or a ‘must’, it’s more a feeling of ‘this is the real me’.
2. Is this what you want your time on earth to be about?Look at the picture of the earth, right. Think of all the possible lives you could live in your short time here. Is this value something you want to stand for?
3. Is this your voice speaking?The final test is to ask yourself whether each value is really yours. If not, who else’s could it be? Don’t try and please anyone else with your value.
Your values
Relationships
Growth, development,
wellbeing
Leisure
Leisure values
Growth values
Relationship values
Work
Work values
Instructions: think of 4 major parts of your life and the values you hold in each. What’s important to you
in each of these areas? Write some key values in each section? What’s most important to you in each
section?
Relationships
Relationship values:(list your relationship values here)
What do you do when you honour
this value?(List the actions you take)
Instructions: Consider what you actually do when you are honouring your relationship values. List these actions in the box on the right.
It’s what you choose with your feet, not your mind, that shows what you value.
Value-directed actions for
Relationships
Work
Work values:(list your relationship values here)
What do you do when you honour
this value?(List the actions you take)
Instructions: Consider what you actually do when you are honouring your relationship values. List these actions in the box on the right.
It’s what you choose with your feet, not your mind, that shows what you value.
Value-directed actions for
Work
Leisure
Leisure values:(list your relationship values here)
What do you do when you honour
this value?(List the actions you take)
Instructions: Consider what you actually do when you are honouring your relationship values. List these actions in the box on the right.
It’s what you choose with your feet, not your mind, that shows what you value.
Value-directed actions for
Leisure
Growth
Growth values:(list your relationship values here)
What do you do when you honour
this value?(List the actions you take)
Instructions: Consider what you actually do when you are honouring your relationship values. List these actions in the box on the right.
It’s what you choose with your feet, not your mind, that shows what you value.
Value-directed actions for
Growth
The Career Psychologist is an independent occupational psychology consultancy based
in London.We offer coaching, consultancy,
training, measurement and assessment to individuals and businesses looking to make a
change for the better.
www.thecareerpsychologist.com www.linkedin.com/robarcher