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The Hmong Culture

by Jennifer XiongDPI WEOP Office Eau Claire, jennifer.xiong@dpi.state.wi.usPresented to DPI Staff on Oct 2004

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History of the Hmong

Hmong means free. Ancient people from Southern China A few thousand years ago, the Hun

invaded from the North and the Hmong began Southard immigrations.

Thousands of families began historic travels down the rivers and mountain summits to the South.

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In the 19th century, they began to settle in the mountainous regions of Northern Laos.

In 1954, the Hmong tried to remain neutral in a political turmoil but were drawn to fight against the Pathet Lao and North Vietnamese, which was supported by the USA.

The Hmong were trained as soldiers of special forces to defend the Northeast region of Laos.

They were known as the secret army because there was no official recognition of fighting in Laos and the Americans have never heard of Hmong soldiers.

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Saigon fell in 1975 and the American forces withdrew and the Hmong were left in the hands of their enemy.

Many Hmong families stayed behind to fight and protect their families while others were driven from their homes and thousands fled to safety by swimming across the Mekong River to Thailand.

Before the war, the American government promised that if the Hmong fought with the US, they would be taken care of.

18 clans in the Hmong society

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Everybody belongs to a clan, everybody with the same last name

The reason for belonging to a clan is the ability to identify themselves or be affiliated to other Hmong people around the world.

If you know someone with the same last name and you are not even related, you can not marry that person. A person must seek marriage outside of his/her clan.

The Hmong is a very tight-knit clan and very family oriented.

Hmong households consists of extended family members such as grandparents, uncles, aunts, siblings, cousins, and their immediate family members.

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Religion Animism/Buddhism Many of the Hmong are now converted to

Christianity by missionaries in Laos. When a child is born, that individual is welcomed

in to the family with a ceremony called hu plig or khi tes.

A big feast, with white strings tied to the hand for a great future and good luck

When a man is married and has a couple of kids, he gets an elder name added to his original name to signify maturity. It is common for Hmong women to carry on their husbands name.

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Education

No formal education before coming to America Many children received one year or less of

education Some refugees study English in the camps

from American volunteers

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Diet

Rice Vegetables with little meat or fish Chicken, pork, and beef are dominant In Laos, they usually raise cows, pigs, and

chickens to butcher Rice is grown

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Needlework One of the distinctive features of the

Hmong culture is the elaborate and colorful needlework crafted by Hmong girls.

Most traditional clothing are made Clothes are worn to new years and

celebrations

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New Years

Socialize Meet their future husband/wife Ball tossing Sing songs to each other

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Funerals

3 days long Animals such as cows are used to sacrifice

for the dead. Trained elder used to guide person to their

destination. A musical instrument called the “qeej” will

be played.

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Weddings Arranged/forced or Mutual

Reasons for forced marriages-Girls side of family is poor and wants

their daughter to marry someone rich.-Parents want their child to have a good

future-Close relatives.

Weddings are from Friday to Saturday night Bride Price/Dowry Feast or Wedding is held on Saturday after a

negotiation is made. Bride and Groom will receive instructions on how

to be a good husband and wife.

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Roles Order of birth, age, gender, and

leadership play an important part in the decision making

Best interest of family comes before the individual

As children, they are taught to meet other’s needs and respect the opinions of their parents’ or of older people.

In a dispute or if a problem occurs and the family can not resolve it, they always consult with their clan members.

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Etiquette for Interacting with the Hmong The handshake is a new concept to the Hmong

culture. Traditional Hmong do not shake hands with the female. Many Hmong female will feel embarrassed shaking hands with a male. Traditionally people greet one another verbally. Holding hands tightly during a handshake will embarrass a Hmong woman.

When conversing with a Hmong family, always ask for the head of the household which is the father.

Many Hmong possess a limited English vocabulary so when talking to a less assimilated Hmong person, one should use simple terminology.

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When entering a Hmong home, a seat will be offered. If one does not sit, family members may assume that their furniture is not clean or contagious with diseases. Or that the visitor is of higher status than the family members are.

Most traditional men do not want others to touch their head or those of their children due to personal values and religious beliefs.

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Hmong teach their children to be well behaved in the presence of guests. In a case where their child is interrupting or not behaving, they will not send their child to their room or discipline them. Discipline is usually right after the guest leaves.

When talking to a Hmong person, he/she may not look directly at you or give you eye contact. The person you are talking to may look down or away. Traditionally looking directly into the face of a Hmong person is considered inappropriate.

It is considered inappropriate for the opposite gender to sit too close to one another when conversing. To avoid misinterpretation, a male should keep a distance between himself and a female when in conversation.

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It is common for Hmong families to visit one another without calling or setting up time. Sometimes they will just show up at the door and expect a warm welcome. It is considered rude if you tell them you don’t have time to visit with them.

Confidentiality is considered very important but within the family itself, confidentiality may not be thought of as important.

If a Hmong person offers you a drink, you should not decline. This is considered impolite. To not offend him or her, take the drink or object being offered and hold it for a while before placing it on the table. Refrain from quickly saying no.

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There are many unusual physical marks which might be found on the body of a Hmong person. These are commonly the result of a home treatment for traditional healing and health problems such as colds and headaches. These marks may be bruises or redness from spooning, cupping, or coining on the neck, shoulder, back, chest, forearms, and forehead. At times, Hmong will wear unusual red necklaces, silver and brass bracelets, white strings, or red and white strings on their wrist, ankle, or neck. These are worn for health and religious purposes.

When visiting a Hmong family, watch for a stick in the front door. It is usually a branch of green leaves. Sometimes there is a white or black woven octagon shaped basket made of bamboo or plastic placed next to the branch. If one observes this, one should not knock or enter the house. The house is protected from evil spirits.

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Even if there is no branch of green leaves present, before entering a Hmong home always ask the person who opens the door to see if visitors are allowed to enter the house. Hmong families sometime have just had a shaman perform a ritual. For a period of time after this ritual, visitors are not allowed to enter, wear shoes, and carry handbags when entering the house.

If you visit during mealtime, guests will be offered to join the family in eating. Whether you want to or not, he or she should take part in the meal. Just take a bite or two and that will make them happy. Otherwise, the family will stop eating and talk to the guest until he or she leaves.

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School system and the Hmongtaken from Unfamiliar Partners (a report from the National Coalition of advocates for students)

Hmong parents want teachers and administrators they can trust.

People who are truly concerned with the growth and welfare of their children and who are sensitive to the ways children are brought up.

Hmong parents never had any formal education and no voice in their children’s education.

Whatever happens to their children would be seen as the faults, mistake, or abuse of the schools.

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Parents had no role to teach their children academically but they do teach their children about family values, morality, and manners.

Parents have high expectations from teachers and tend to withdraw from American teachers when they fail to meet these expectations.

Parents blame their children for not studying hard enough and think that is the reason they don’t perform well in school.

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Parents say they don’t speak the language so they can’t participate in their children’s education.

Many parents feel that they are unable to meet with teachers and principals because they can not speak English.

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Using Children as Interpreters

Results in Negative outcomes such as role reversal and power dynamics in the parent/child relationship

Parent’s role may be undercut if a child is asked to deliver a message about the child’s behavior or failure to attend school.

Easy for child to manipulate the message or fail to deliver it entirely to avoid the consequences of a parent’s displeasure.

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A child who has mastered English may not have the ability to communicate with adults in their first language.

Phone calls and letters sent home are only accessible to children.

In a household where the children open the mail, children have the opportunity to dispose the letter before it even reaches the parents.

Children often don’t listen to their parents because they feel they know better. It is not unusual for Asian kids to feel embarrassed by their parents lack of English.

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Many parents feel that children are less respectful in the US and have too much freedom because of the influence of TV.

Time out and taking away privileges do not work for Hmong families when children play the role of adults in most communication outside the family.

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In the U.S. children use child protection laws to threaten their parents. Parents are afraid to say anything because their children will call the police and they can’t speak the language.

Child protection laws have taken away traditional methods of punishing a child, “because they are here and this is a free country”.

One of the difference between Asian schools and American Schools is that they were allowed to physically discipline students.

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Communication Barriers Between the School System and Hmong Parents Asian parents don’t feel that suspension

will help children not wanting to attend school; rather causes students to drop out.

One result of poor communication between parents and teachers, language barriers, and failure of school personnel to learn about the culture is poor attendance by Asian families at school-sponsored events for parents.

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Schools hesitate to send written materials home in the Hmong language because they worry about the accuracy of verbal and written translations and can not afford to hire someone to double check for accuracy.

Schools may say they can not afford bilingual teachers, aides or if they have the resources, say they can not find a qualified individual.

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Two way communication

School meetings are often scheduled at a convenient time for teachers but not for the parents. Immigrant families may work two or three different jobs.

In order for the schools and parents to understand each other, one must lay their traditional assumptions regarding parent involvement aside and be as concerned about learning the needs of parents as they are about making parents aware of school needs.

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Asian parents may feel like coming to US schools with an “us vs. them” situation

Schools should have an accurate understanding of the cultural and linguistic background.

Schools may try to impress parents to meet their needs by telling them they will try to hire a bilingual/bicultural staff.

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Talk with parents directly rather than assuming that they don’t care about their child’s education.

Provide diversity training to staffs on a regular basis.

Hmong parents like schools to meet them half way such as bilingual teachers calling them in the evening or making home visits.

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Improving home/school communication from Unfamiliar Partners (National Coalition of Advocates for students) Hmong parents need personal contact. Use

individuals in the community to communicate with

parents. School staff need to be truthful. If Hmong children

are placed two or three grades below where they should be placed, tell them. Parents think their children are receiving straight A’s but when they graduate they can’t go to a 4yr college but instead a community college.

Use parents’ expertise in a positive way, rather than impose on what schools want parents to do for their children, for example, storytelling, chaperone a trip, crafts, etc.

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Hmong parents don’t feel as if they belong in America, until they can be made to feel as an equal part of the community, they will not feel comfortable and fully engage in school.

A lot of schools have a large Hmong population and very few Hmong professional employed. More Hmong professional and staff are needed.

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School Meetings

Select facilitators who feel comfortable with communicating in the primary language and also who can identify with the concerns of the parents.

Make sure information is shared rather than taught, and the tone of the meeting is friendly.

Send invitations in their language and follow up with a phone call.

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Car pool for those who don’t drive. Provide childcare for younger children. Provide a translator if needed.

All parents want what’s best for their kids, and Hmong parents are not different.