MAY 2014, VOL. 12 ISSUE 3

Complimentary

Herman Frank, RN, BSN, MHA, NEA-BC, FACHEVice President of Operations

Melissa Reynolds, RN, CRRNDirector of Nursing

SEE PAGE 22

Publisher / Editor

Mike Strong

Sales Manager

Dottie Godberry

Staff Photographer

Jimmy Dunkley

Contributing Writers

Bill Delaune

Marilyn Bowman

Linda Melancon

Calvin Bessonett

Bully

Goosie Guice

Orhan McMillan

Kellie Seymour

Tanya Stilley

Roland Doucet

Jimmy Dunkley

Meredith Conger

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Ascension Magazine

18386 Little Prairie Rd.Prairieville, LA 70769

CHAMBER SPRING FLING..... 4

SWEET EYES W/ TANYA............8

UMRH OPENS ........................... ..........22

BILL DELAUNE........................26

THOUGHTS FROM BULLY ....28

USELESS RANDOM FACTS .....29

JAMMIN WITH GOOSIE.........30

HIGH SCHOOL SOFTBALL ....31

Table of Contents

FOR MORE INFORMATION

225.622.3262www.riverparishfoods.com

The Ascension Chamber ofCommerce held its 3rd AnnualSpring Fling Event on the evening of Wednesday, April 23rd and washosted by Cox Communications andGonzales Mike Andersons. Nearly150 Chamber Members gathered inthe courtyard of Mike Andersons inGonzales to celebrate the 2014Spring Fling networking social.

It was a relaxing evening filled withwonderful refreshments as well asnetworking. This event is a fun wayfor local Chamber members to mix,mingle and make new contacts witharea businesses in a relaxed setting.

4

Chamber of Commerce3rd Annual Spring FlingNetworks Many Smiles

5All attendees were given anAscension Now! sticker to wearto not only remind us all of the

great things that are happeningin Ascension Parish but also toremind us all to think local first.

EATEL AWARDS LOCALSTUDENTS WITHTECHNOLOGYAWARDSOutstanding scholars from Ascensionand Livingston area high schools gath-ered April 16, 2014 for EATELsannual Technology Awards Ceremony,now in its 28th year. Focusing on theimportance of both technology andacademic success, EATEL presentedsix outstanding graduating seniorsfrom each high school in its servingarea, (Donaldsonville, Dutchtown,East Ascension, French Settlement,Maurepas and St. Amant highschools), with a touch-screen, travel-friendly laptop computer.

Technology Award applicants musthave an overall grade point average of3.0 or higher, actively participate inschool and community activities, andplan to pursue their studies at aLouisiana-accredited college or uni-versity. These students must also planto pursue a major in one of the STEMcategories: science, technology, engi-neering, or math. The 2014 recipientswere chosen from a pool of applicantsby a counselor from each school.

Being a corporate citizen in thiscommunity, we think its important todo our part to help these students,stated Toby Dubois, EATEL ChiefMarketing Officer. As the worldmoves to more of a cloud-based, wire-less format, we want to make surethese students have the tools to thrivein that environment. The schools aredoing a phenomenal job preparingthese young people for tomorrowswork force; these technology awardsallow us to serve a supporting rolewith the school systems by puttingtechnology into the hands of six,truly deserving graduating seniors.

The following students are the 2014EATEL Technology Award recipients:

Kaitlyn Cayette of Donaldsonville High School 4.3927 GPA Plans to attend Xavier University of Louisianaand major in chemistry. For her career, she plansto become a pharmacist.

Hira Hasan of Dutchtown High School 4.76 GPA Plans to attend Louisiana State University andmajor in Biomedical Engineering. She plans tobecome a biomedical engineer one day.

Jessica Landry of East Ascension High School 4.53 GPA Plans to attend Louisiana Tech University andmajor in biomedical engineering. She plans tobecome a biomedical engineer after college.

Steven Pirvu of St. Amant High School 4.499 GPA Plans to attend Louisiana Tech University andmajor in biomedical engineering. He plans to ownhis own company one day.

Katherine Lirette of French Settlement High School 4.0 GPA Plans to attend Southeastern LouisianaUniversity and major in psychology. After gradua-tion, she plans to become a psychologist, psychia-trist, or attorney.

Amber Guillory of Maurepas High School 3.5 GPA Plans to attend Southeastern LouisianaUniversity and major in science. She plans to workin the medical field after graduating.

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EATEL honored six outstanding graduating seniors with new laptops for use in their collegiate studies. Pictured are the 2014 EATEL Technology Award recipients (L to R): East Ascension High School recipient Jessica

Landry, French Settlement High School recipient Katherine Lirette, Maurepas High School recipient Amber Guillory, St. Amant High School recipient Steven Pirvu, Donaldsonville High School recipient Kaitlyn Cayette,

and Dutchtown High School recipient Hira Hasan.

7The RomanticHeart: AgelessSymbol of Lovewith Layne Gautreau

As a universal symbol of love, theheart has had romantic meaningsfor centuries. In ancient times, theheart was thought to be the centerof devotion, sincerity, and passion.It was well known that the heartbeats faster when people are excited or upset. For this reason, itwas believed that the heart was thecenter of our feelings and thesource of all our emotions. It latercame to be associated exclusivelywith the emotion of love.

Since Victorian times the heart hasbeen the primary symbol ofValentines Day, which is a holidaycelebrating love. Now, when oneperson bestows a heart on another,

the message I give my heart toyou is unmistakable.

Heart Shaped Jewelry Comes InMany Romantic StylesThe romantic heart is also theworlds leading design forValentines Day jewelry. It is sopopular, you can choose from anunlimited number of styles in all

price ranges. These include pendants, rings, bracelets, lockets,pins, earrings, and necklaces.

Hearts of Gold, Silver, andPlatinum Are Traditional GiftsGleaming 14K and 18K yellowgold hearts and hearts of shimmering white platinum andsterling silver come in many beautiful polished and texturedfinishes. Many are set withsparkling diamonds to make scintillating gifts of love. Theheart, a traditional Valentines Daygift, may display lustrous pearls, as well as, vivid red gems whichare a favorite Valentines Day color for lovers.

Did You Know?Fascinating Factsabout Pearls

1. In ancient times pearls werebelieved to be moon drops whichhad fallen into the sea and wereswallowed by oysters.

2. A carpet of pearls, 10 feet longby 6 feet wide, was once owned byIndias Gaekwar of Baroda. It wascomposed entirely of strings of lustrous pearls, except for an 11-inch border which was made ofdiamonds. The carpet was not forwalking on, but was said to have

been made as a cover forMohammeds tomb.

3. Simulated pearls, called Muranopearls, were made by the millionsin medieval Venice. They were hollow glass balls coated with aniridescent paste or artificial nacre.It was called Essence de Orientand was made from fish scales.This technique is still populartoday for making high quality artificial pearls having as many as40 layers of iridescent coating.

4. The oldest surviving pearl necklace dates from around 350B.C. and was unearthed at Susa,an ancient city in western Iran, siteof the Persian kings winter palace.

8Its not thePlanet Beachyou used toknowLate last year I was talking to my Aunt Jean, and she mentioned she bought thePlanet Beach on HighlandRoad in Prairieville. I thought,oh, ok, I can go there if I everwant to tan. But when sheinvited me to come for a day ofpampering, I had no idea whatwas in store.

I went into Planet Beach, nowknown as Contempo Spa, andstarted my afternoon with theSlim Capsule. It was a wetsauna capsule, where I burnedlots of calories but was alsoinfused with aromatherapy. Ialso enjoyed a Lumiere, redlight therapy facial.

The Lumire Light Thrapiedevice deals with the first factor

that contributes to aging in theskin - decreasing cell energy.When cells are exposed to uniform light at precisely 633nanometers, these cells readilyabsorb the light and are highlyenergized, restoring their

metabolism and ultimately amore youthful appearance.Lumiere light therapy helpstighten pores, improve skintone and texture, give a vibrant,healthier-looking skin andreduces wrinkles. In just a fewtreatments, I've noticesmoother skin tone and texture. I'm excited to seewhat happens from here!

Then I followed up with aMystic Tan. This was in the

winter, so it was nice to knowthey now have whats called aclear. This clear spray tanwas more natural looking thanmost spray tans, perfect for ahealthy winter look. Also, I wasimpressed to know that themystic tan solution was all plantbased. I didnt know that.

I found myself wanderingthrough thehalls of thespa lookingfor somethingelse to enjoy,but I decidedI'd comeback anotherday to enjoythe rest of the spa.

So, nexttime youreconsideringgoing to a

spa, consider going to PlanetBeach Contempo Spa, wherethey offer:

Teeth WhiteningShiatsu massage chairLumiere Light FaialTraditional TanningWater Massage tableMystic TanDry SaunaSlim Capsule

TMJTreatmentwithCosmeticBenefitsIve suffered with teeth grinding for years; this is amedical condition calledBruxism and is commonly associated with TMJ. I dontknow why, but in the last year(perhaps due to lifestyle stress)the grinding has gotten worse,and it has caused my jaw muscles, specifically my mas-seter muscles, (diagram below)to tighten and knot. Ive triedheat and even special facial massages to release these knots,but nothing really worked.

After doing some research I

found that dentists are nowusing Botox to relieve mastermuscles and reduce the discomfort associated with TMJ.

Something else I noticed wasover the years; my jaw musclehad significantly increased insize. My dentist reminded methat when that muscle getsworked, it increases in size justlike a bicep would.

My jaw line had gotten moremasculine over time, and notonly would the Botox help thepain, but also restore my morenatural, more feminine jaw line

9features. This was a huge findfor me.

I got my first injection lastweek, and the knots are gone,the pain is gone, and I think Iwill notice more of a shift andreduction in muscle size inanother week or so.

I am so excited about this effective treatment of TMJ andenlarged masseter muscles!

Doing whatyou LoveConservesEnergyAmericans and people in generalhave a tough time with stayingenergized. Everyone is

exhausted, fueling themselveswith loads of sugar and coffeeto get through the day. I oftendiscuss the latest in health andwellness and it is important totake care of your body; howev-er, theres a solution to yourexhaustion that goes deeperthan the body. The solution isrealizing who you are to thecore.

When you examine your heartand understand who you reallyare, you understand what yourpassion and your purpose is.When you begin to fulfill yourtrue purpose, then you will beenergized from the inside out.Even if your career is not whereyou fulfill your purpose, itsimportant that you fulfill yourpurpose in some way.

So, who are you, really? Whatdo you love to do? Are youdoing it? What is your passion?Only when you connect to your passion will you truly be energized.

10

Unwanted hair. Everyone has itsomewhere and removing it hasalways been a problem. Now menand women alike can make unwanted facial or body hair a thing of the past and forget aboutpainful waxing, messy creams, electrolysis, and razors.

Z Aesthetic Dermatology uses someof the most advanced technology inlaser hair removal treatments. Dr.Ann Zedlitz and her Z team canassist women AND men in improvingtheir appearance and dealing withunwanted hair. Laser hair removal isa treatment that can permanentlyreduce unwanted hair anywhere onthe body. It has been FDA approvedto provide significant reduction of hairwith long-term results.

Laser hair removal uses specializedlasers to target the pigmentation ofthe hair follicles to keep them fromregrowing. Laser hair removal beginswith the trimming of unwanted hair toa length that will respond best to thelaser. The surface of the skin will beprotected from the heat of the laserwith a cooling gel or device that also

helps the laser effectively penetratethe skins outer layer. A topical anesthetic might also be applied to

keep the patient as comfortable aspossible during treatment.

Once the area is properly prepared,the Medical Aesthetician uses thelaser tool to destroy the hair follicles.Unwanted hair will fall out naturally,and the damage to the follicle

renders it unable to grow new hair inmost cases. Treatment may take justa few minutes for a smaller area likethe upper lip, or an hour or more forlarger areas.

Patients describe laser hair removalas relatively comfortable. They aremade comfortable in a treatmentchair, and the area of the body beingtreated is prepared. Patients can uselaser hair removal on all parts of thebody including: Arms Legs Face (upper lip, chin, beard) Underarms Bikini line Back Chest

Dr. Z - Ann Zedlitz, M.D. is a boardcertified dermatologists and her Z

Team are dedicated tohelping every womanand man look and feeltheir very best. ZAestheticDermatology, locatedat 5305 Flanders Dr.Baton Rouge, is astate of the art facilityequipped with the latest in advancedtechnology and offersan array of cosmeticand laser procedures.Contact the Z team

today to see how we can help youenjoy beautiful, hair-free skin withlaser hair removal 225.778.7540!

Its SummerSMOOTH IS IN!

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11

Pelican Pointand AscensionParish AreGoing Pink!Susan G. Komen

Baton Rouge AscensionPink Ribbon Scramble

July10th at Pelican Point

Golf Club

Come enjoy a round of golfand help raise funds to save thelives of the women in AscensionParish!

Register a Team Be a Sponsor Provide a Door Prize

Shes the Reason Why We Go Pink.All smiles, Mindy LaBauve holds up four fingers to indicate the completion of her fourth round ofchemotherapy. Even though she wasdevastated by her diagnosis, she didher best to present a strong front.Mindy found love and strengthfrom her family, but also an unexpected source of hope and

encouragement with other breastcancer survivors.

She remembers her first encounterwith Susan G. Komen. Race forthe Cure was only days before myscheduled mastectomy. I told myfamily that I wanted to form ateam and for us all to attend theRace together. I was overwhelmedwhen I got to the survivors tent toline up for the parade. People werehugging and laughing. I instantlyknew that they understood my struggle. There was so much love! I just couldnt believe what I was seeing.

Wanting to share the same kind ofsupport she receives from herbreast cancer sisters, Mindy nowvolunteers with Komen BatonRouge. She also encourages herfellow Ascension Parish residentsto join in the fight and the fun atthis years Ascension Pink RibbonScramble. It is so important thatwe help provide funding for breasthealth education and screening forthose who are uninsured. Earlydetection is the key to saving lives!

We Live HERE. We Golf HERE. We Save LivesHERE!

Last year Susan G. KomenBaton Rouge provided funding for 525 mammogramsright here at in our community.

Services available to women andmen of Ascension Parish:

Education Mammograms Clinical Breast Exams Diagnostic Services Medication Assistance Transportation Assistance Exercise Therapy Survivor Support

If you or someone you know is uninsured and cannot afford a mammogram, call (225) 675-6896. River Region Cancer Screening Center

For more information contactus at (225) 615-8740 orKomenBatonRouge.org

Gift Cards Available!

Call for your free skincare analysis today!

Mindy LaBauveafter 4th chemo treatment

We Can UseYour Help!

12

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Cajun Livin N CookinHost 1st Annual CrawfishBoil Championship

Here are the winners of thecrawfish boiling competition.

1st place Kaylon Godso2nd place Kyle Blanchard3rd place Louis Lambert David Kleinpeter Wins the crawfish eating Contest

Kaylon & Tim Godso of Peppers Market Kyle Blanchard of Blanchards Blend Seasonings Louis Lambert with Dempsey Lambert Cousilman Dist. 5

1st PLace 2nd PLace 3rd PLace

14

This month with

A monthly News Report from the Jambalaya Festival Association

See You at the Festival

15

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Limited to one person in each immediate family.

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13375 Hwy 73, Suite 1 Geismar, LA 70734 Call: 225.673.6910 www. AscensionDentist.com

ORAL CANCERBy Calvin Bessonet, DDS,FAGD

The Importance of Early Detection

Your dentist has recent good newsabout progress against cancer. It isnow easier than ever to detect oralcancer early, when the opportunity fora cure is great. Only half of allpatients diagnosed with oral cancersurvive more than five years.Your dentist has the skills and tools toensure that early signs of cancer andpre-cancerous conditions are identi-fied. You and your dentist can fightand win the battle against oral cancer.Know the early signs and see yourdentist regularly.

You Should Know

Oral Cancer often starts as a tiny,unnoticed white or red spot or soreanywhere in the mouth. It can affect any area of the oralcavity including the lips, gum tissue,check lining, tongue and the hard orsoft palate. A change in the way the teeth fittogether Oral Cancer most often occurs inthose who use tobacco in any form.

Other signs include: A sore that bleeds easily or does not heal A color change of the oral tissues A lump, thickening, rough spot,crust or small eroded area Pain, tenderness, or numbness any-where in the mouth or on the lips

Difficulty chewing, swallowing,speaking or moving the jaw ortongue. Alcohol use combined with smok-ing greatly increases risk. Prolonged exposure to the sunincreases the risk of lip cancer.Oralcancers can occur in people who donot smoke and have no other knownrisk factors.Oral Cancer is more likelyto strike after age 40.Studies suggestthat a diet high in fruits and vegetables may prevent the development of potentially cancerous lesions.

Regular Dental Check-upsImportant

Oral cancer screening is a routine partof a dental examination. Regularcheck-ups, including an examinationof the entire mouth, are essential inthe early detection of cancerous andpre-cancerous conditions. You mayhave a very small, but dangerous, oralspot or sore and not be aware of it.

Your dentist will carefully examine theinside of your mouth and tongue andin some patients may notice a flat,painless, white or red spot or a smallsore. Although most of these areharmless, some are not. Harmful oralspots or sores often look identical tothose that are harmless, but testingcan tell them apart. If you have a sorewith a likely cause, your dentist maytreat it and ask you to return for re-examination.

Dentists often will notice a spot orsore that looks harmless and does nothave a clear cause. To ensure that aspot or sore is not dangerous, yourdentist may choose to perform a

simple test, such as a brush test. Abrush test collects cells from a suspicious lesion in the mouth. Thecells are sent to a laboratory for analysis. If precancerous cells arefound, the lesion can be surgicallyremoved if necessary during a separateprocedure. Its important to knowthat all atypical and positive resultsfrom a brush test must be confirmedby incisional biopsy and histology.

Facts About Oral Cancer

Incidence and Mortality

Oral cancer strikes an estimated34,360 Americans each year. An estimated 7,550 people (5,180 menand 2,370 women) will die of thesecancers in 2007. More than 25% of the 30,000Americans who get oral cancer will dieof the disease. On average, only half of those diagnosed with the disease will survivemore than five years. African-Americans are especially vul-nerable; the incidence rate is 1/3higher than whites and the mortalityrate is almost twice as high.

Risk Factors

Although the use of tobacco andalcohol are risk factors in developingoral cancer, approximately 25% of oralcancer patients have no known riskfactors. There has been a nearly five-foldincrease in incidence in oral cancerpatients under age 40, many with noknown risk factors. The incidence of oral cancer inwomen has increased significantly,largely due to an increase in women

smoking. In 1950 the male to femaleratio was 6:1; by 2002, it was 2:1.

Prevention and Detection

The best way to prevent oral canceris to avoid tobacco and alcohol use. Regular dental check-ups, including an examination of the entire mouth, are essential in the early detection of cancerous andpre-cancerous conditions.

Many types of abnormal cells candevelop in the oral cavity in the formof red or white spots. Some are harmless and benign, some are cancerous and others are pre-cancer-ous, meaning they can develop intocancer if not detected early andremoved. (American Cancer Society) Finding and removing epithelialdysplasias before they become cancercan be one of the most effectivemethods for reducing the incidence of cancer. Knowing the risk factors and seeingyour dentist for oral cancer screeningscan help prevent this deadly disease.Routine use of the Pap smear since1955, for example, dramaticallyreduced the incidence and mortalityrates for cervical cancer in the UnitedStates. Oral cancer is often preceded by thepresence of clinically identifiable premalignant changes. These lesionsmay present as either white or redpatches or spots. Identifying whiteand red spots that show dysplasia andremoving them before they becomecancer is an effective method forreducing the incidence and mortalityof cancer.

17

Interdiction andContinuingTutorship: What Makes Them DifferentBefore you can understand acontinuing tutorship and howit differs from an interdiction,you have to know what aninterdiction is and you have tounderstand what a tutorship is.A tutor is the person legallyresponsible for a minor (someone under 18 inLouisiana). A minors parentsare his tutors while they aremarried, but if they are

divorced or one or both aredeceased, it may be necessaryto appoint someone to belegally responsible for theminor since the minor lackscapacity to make his own decisions. The process forappointing a tutor is called atutorship. In most states, thisprocess is called a guardian-ship. When the minor reachesthe age of 18, the tutorshipends since he now has thelegally capacity to make hisown decisions. An interdictionis much like a tutorship exceptit is the legal process forappointing someone to makedecisions for a major (someone18 or older in Louisiana) whodoes not have the capacity tomake his own decisions.

That brings us to a continuingtutorship. It is a hybridbetween a tutorship and aninterdiction. A continuingtutorship is the process forappointing a tutor for someoneover the age of 15. However,unlike a regular tutorship, thetutorship does not end whenthe person reaches the age of18. The continuing tutorship

is only available for those overthe age of 15 and only in theinstance where he or she hasless than two-thirds of theaverage mental ability of a person of the same age withnormal intelligence. Thismeans the persons IQ must beless than 67. The continuingtutorship is not available forsomeone who lacks the abilityto care for themselves for otherreasons for instance becausethey have severe physical disabilities unaccompanied bythe requisite mental deficiencies or because of mental illness.

Like the tutorship of a minorand a full interdiction, the person under a continuingtutorship loses most of hisrights and the person appoint-ed as the tutor is responsiblefor the person just as if he werea minor. For instance, the lawlimits the ability of someoneunder a continuing tutorshipto enter into contracts. Theyalso cannot marry unless theyobtain the permission of thetutor. The law does notaddress whether they lose theright to vote. They do, however, lose their ability toappear in court on their ownbehalf so they cannot be suedand they cannot sue someone

else. Their tutor must act forthem with regard to court proceedings.

The law specifically grants theright to the tutor to makemedical decisions for someoneunder a continuing tutorship;thus, the individual loses theright to make their own medical decisions just as in an interdiction.

As you can see, like an interdiction, a continuingtutorship can be a costly andtime consuming process.Further, it can only be used inthe limited circumstance wherea person has less than two-thirds of the average mental capacity of a non-impaired person. However, inthe limited circumstance wherea continuing tutorship is available, it is a viable alternative to an interdictionand will provide substantiallythe same result.

Mrs. Melancon has engaged in the practiceof law in Louisiana for the past 17 years.The primary focus of her practice is estateplanning, special needs planning, elderlaw and probate. She is also accredited bythe VA to give advice regarding veteransbenefits. For more information, please con-tact her at 222-744-0027 .You may alsovisit her website atwww.LegacyCenterLa.com.

YOUR ESTATE MATTERSBy Linda Melancon

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DREAMS COME TRUE, INC.SPONSORSHIP OPPORTUNITIES

Please Help a Childs Dream Come TrueDream Sponsorship - $1500This monetary donation funds a childs dream. This will entitle you to an opportunity to participate in the presentation of a childs dream, official recognition, a plaque, and 10 reserved VIP dance tickets and front row table hostess, and20 general admission tickets. (Must have VIP ticket at the door to enter the VIP section.)

Gold Sponsorship - $1000This will entitle you to official recognition, a plaque, 10 reserved dance tickets and onereserved table, along with 10 general admission tickets.

Silver Sponsorship - $500This will entitle you to official recognition at the dance, a plaque, and 20 general admis-sion dance tickets.

For ticket and volunteer information contact:Gonzales - Max Himmel -673-8777 cell 715-2881

Na Na Sha to perform at Lamar-Dixon

Doors Open at 6pm Dance 7pm till 11pm.

MUST BE 18 YEARS OF AGE TO ENTER

18th Annual Fundraiser DanceSaturday August 16th

Tickets available at Himmels 16491 Airline Hwy 70769 (225) 673-8777

HIMMELSARCHITECTURALDOORS & HARDWARE

19

ASK YOUR

Realtorwi th Mar i l yn Bowman

Top 10 Tips toPrepare Your Homefor Spring afterSevere Winter

As much of the United Statesrecovers from one of the harshest winters in recent history, it is important toinspect your home for damageand plan for home mainte-nance, repair and remodelingprojects. Winter weather can beparticularly damaging to ahome and these tips can returnyour home to top conditionafter the severe winter.Winter weather can damagehomes in ways that arent easilyvisible. Home owners shouldprotect their investment andhire a professional remodeler torepair or replace damaged components now, before springstorms create more problems.Here are10 tips for home owners to inspect for damageand make sure your home is ready for spring from top to bottom:

Inspect roof Check your rooffor loose, warped or missingshingles and make sure thechimney flashing and skylightseals are intact. This is especiallyimportant in light of the recenthail storms we have experi-enced.

Clean and repair guttersClear winter storm debris fromgutters and downspouts, andcheck that they are still securelyattached to the house. Blockedor loose gutters can allow waterinto your home and damagetrim. If gutters are not properlymaintained they can cause moredamage than protection to yourhome.

Look for leaks Commonculprits for hard-to-find leaksare attics, crawl spaces andwashing machine hoses. Inspectthese areas, look under sinks fordamage from frozen pipes andcheck your water heater forsigns of corrosion.u

Clear exterior drainsRemove leaves from underground or exterior drainsto clear the way for springshowers and prevent backups.

Inspect siding Inspect sidingfor pieces that have come looseduring winter storms.

Check window and doorseals Examine the exteriorcaulking on door and windowseals to ensure it remains watertight.

Patch cracks Patch cracks inconcrete driveways, sidewalksand steps to keep water out andprevent further expansion.

Paint the exterior Paintingor touching up paint on theexterior of your home not onlymakes it look better, but willalso help protect the homefrom the elements.

Inspect the HVAC Hire aqualified technician to serviceyour homes HVAC system tomake sure it is running properlybefore hot temperatures call forair conditioning. Now is alsothe time to replace your HVACfilters.

Check your homes gradingEnsure the grading of your yardslopes away from your homesfoundation to keep excess mois-ture at bay.Dont wait to inspect yourhome and get damage fixed.Many professional remodelersnot only renovate homes; theyrepair or replace damaged ordeteriorating roofs, windows,doors and other home features.Remodeling and repair projectscan require your home to beopen to the elements and com-panies may have a backlog ofwork due to the length andseverity of the winter season.Choose your repair and renova-tion projects for the year aheadand start planning now. Puttingoff repairs will only cost youmore in the future! Protect oneof the largest investments youhave ever made.

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20

Our 30th annual Senior day event at Fred's on the River was another success. Everyone enjoyed the

great food, music, and dancing. This event would not be a success without the many volunteers who work extremely hard to put this event on every year. Also, the many businesses in the area who all donated to make

Senior Day special for our senior citizens.

We hope to see you again next year.

Shirley Leggett attends Senior Day, at Freds, started by her brother Fred Boyd.

Freds on the River Host Senior Day

21

The lobby of the United Medical RehabilitationHospital could never be mistaken for a comedyclub. On this day however, as seventy-six year oldLeonce Babin held court for his many children,grandchildren, nieces, and nephews, the spacewas just what the doctor orderedliterally! Theyhad gathered here to help brighten the day ofLeonces wife of fifty-four years, VerraMawMawBabin, who was here recuperating and rehabilitating following her second knee replacement surgery. For Leonce and his extendedfamily, it was quite a different experience fromVerras first replacement surgery just two shortyears ago. Between corny jokes and outdatedpunchlines, Leonce tells the story of the elderlycouples previous post surgery encounter as a living nightmare.

I am no longer able to drive at night or to fightcity traffic on that interstate, Leonce said. Verrahas a hard time recovering from surgery and herrehab is tough on an old gal. After her surgery,she needed more care than my kids and I couldgive her at home. She needed a rehab specialist.She needed help to go to the bathroom, and sheneeded to see a doctor every day. All our kidswork and I could only do so much to help her, soshe was sent to a rehab facility out of town. Icouldnt get there nearly as much as I wanted andmy sweet Verra spent much of the time therealone, confused, and depressed. Her recovery wasminimal because of this and I was scared as Iwatched her will start to fade. After a few dayswe moved her to a nursing home so she would becloser to us. The staff there was attentive andkind, but Verras condition still needed the attention of a rehab doctor, for her physicalneeds, and the family doctor for her medicalneeds. Verra needed a rehabilitation hospital setting close to her family in order to give her acomprehensive rehabilitation program and to keepher motivated. Of course she did eventuallyrecover, but her rehabilitation took much moretime than it would have if she would have beensomewhere with the programs and resources likethose offered at UMRH.

That was then, and this is now, said a surprisingly cheerful Verra as she worked with oneof the physical therapists on staff at United

Medical Rehabilitation Hospital. She winced eachtime she would bend her knee at the urging ofthe therapist but the beaming smile never left herface. She could hear her family laughing at herhusbands jokes and her eyes welled-up with happiness as she vowed to work harder so she would be home soon to join the fun.

Till now, this has been a common story inAscension Parish. Patients of all ages, needingspecialized rehabilitation and post-operative care, have been forced to seek a hospital out of town. That need has now been fulfilled with the arrival of United MedicalRehabilitation Hospital.

United Medical Rehabilitation Hospital (UMRH), a provider of acute inpatient rehabilitative servicessince 2002 with hospitals in Hammond andGretna, will now offer the residents of Ascension ahigh quality acute care hospital with a specialtyfocus in rehabilitation for the medically complexpatient. Corporate management has over 100 years of combined healthcare experience ledby its President John E. Mills, Herman Frank VP of Operations, and Cyrillia Bonds VP of ClinicalServices & Quality.

President Mills spoke with us, In our 12 years asa medical rehabilitation hospital, UMRH hasbecome well versed in the field of RehabMedicine. We have come to understand the similarities as well as the fundamental differences in levels of medical care, particularlythose directly above and below the rehab level.That is to say the LTAC and the SNF. We believethis understanding has enabled our facilities toprovide the care our patients require in a way thatmeets their individual needs and assures them the optimum level of progress. Now all this can be provided here in Ascension, nearer to their home and family.

Mr. Frank, VP of Operations added, UMRH islicensed by the Department of Health andHospitals (DHH) as an Acute Care Hospital witha specialty in Rehabilitation. We employ thesame comprehensive patient focus you will find inyour local general hospital. This means we areable to care for complex patient needs using a

team of consulting physicians.

This team is led by a physiatrist, a specializedphysician who has trained and understands the relationship between the patients underlying disease or medical condition and their functionality. In the Gonzales hospital that leader isLisa A. Diehl, M.D. specializing in family medicine,physical medicine and rehabilitation for 18 years.Dr. Diehl leads a team of physical therapists, occupational therapists, speech and language therapists, rehabilitation nurses, social workers,case managers, and a registered dietician who jointo use best practices with the goal of returning thepatient to their highest level of function. The teamcollaborates with a range of medical specialists inthe fields of Cardiology, Neurology, Orthopedics,Nephrology, and Infectious Disease/Wound CareManagement as well as others. UMRH has over130 credentialed, staffed physicians between theirthree campuses.

We thank God for all the professionals we have,added Mr. Mills, but we also believe best out-comes are more easily attained when we makesure our patients are spiritually fit. Patients andfamilies can request pastoral care as they gothrough these trying moments. Church services areoffered on Sundays and are non-denominational innature. We fervently believe that our operation is aministry because anything that one does for theuplifting of humankind is a ministry Mills continued, As an acute inpatient rehabilitation hospital, United Medical Rehabilitation Hospital is a

significant component in the continuum of care, asa continuation of the patients acute care. In anacute care hospital like St. Elizabeths or Our Ladyof the Lake, patients are treated for one to fourdays to stabilize their acute condition or to havesurgery. In this short time frame patients are stabilized and begin treatment, but patients are notalways capable of returning to their previous levelof functioning. UMRH can help those patients bygiving them another 5 to 14 days, or longer ifneeded, to be followed by a physician every dayand to receive the therapy services they need toprogress and reach their prior level of functioningonce again.

Herman Frank, RN, BSN, MHA, NEA-BC, FACHEVice President of Operations

Melissa Reynolds, RN, CRRNDirector of Nursing

New RehabilitationHospital Brings Qualityto Ascension Parish.

Daily Physician Rounding/Phy Multi-Disciplinary Team 24-Hour RN Coverage

Cardiac Monitoring Pain Short-term IV Therapy (7 14 days

It is our strong belief that anything one does to help in the upliftment of humankind is a ministry. Here at United Medical, we choose the vehicle of physical rehabilitation to advance and play our part in this noble mission.

To that end, we strive everyday to convert our patients into mutual and trusted members of our family. While we specialize in rehabilitation, we understand with reverence that the people we serve are much more than what we do.

Our holistic approach focuses on the social, emotional and spiritual well being of all who come to be served.

I am pleased to be first in line to offer my hand in guiding you through your healing process. Please allow my staff and I the opportunity.

Thank You.John E. Mills, President CEO

Cyrillia Bonds, VP of Clinical Services & Quality concurred, Studies have shown that patients whogo to an acute inpatient rehabilitation hospital likeUMRH have a higher success rate of returning totheir prior home environment and to remain therelonger than patients who leave an acute care hospital and go to a lower level of care, subacutecare, like a skilled nursing facility (SNF), home withhome health care, nursing home, or assisted living.What makes the difference is the medical oversightthat is provided at the acute inpatient rehab hospitalvs. that which is provided in these other settings.

In lower levels of care, patients are seen by a physician weekly to monthly. Once we ensure thata patient is stable when functioning at their highestpotential then this level of medical oversight doesbecome appropriate. But what happens all too oftenis that this lower level of care is utilized first or toosoon, bypassing the order in the continuum of care.The patient may then require readmission to anacute care hospital.

United Medical Rehabilitation Hospital is the only

acute inpatient rehab hospital in Ascension Parish.As an acute hospital, unlike subacute, UMRH provides 24 hour RN coverage for assesment and management of our patients complex conditions incollaboration with our specialized medical team.

All rooms at UMRH are private rooms with flatscreen TVs and most have full private bathrooms.There is a large dining room, two therapy gyms,and an activities of daily living (ADL) gym, allequipped to accommodate individual as well asgroup therapy when appropriate. Family, friends,and significant others are encouraged to visit routinely throughout their loved ones stay. There isplenty of convenient parking close to the mainentrance and for patients who meet medical necessity criteria there is usually no out-of-pocketexpense. UMRH accepts Medicare, Medicaid, andmost major health insurances.

It is joyful news that medical patients in AscensionParish and the surrounding area who are leaving anacute care hospital, no longer have to leave theircommunities for inpatient rehabilitative care becauseUnited Medical Rehabilitation Hospital is now here.UMRH has the capability and the medical expertiseto offer treatment for a wide range of medical conditions including strokes, arthritis, spinal cordinjury, amputations, fractures, (including fractures of

the hip, leg, arm, and ankle), brain injury, majormultiple trauma, congenital deformity, progressiveweakness, progressive loss of function, neurologicaldisorders, debility, and many others. The hospitalcan admit patients from acute care hospitals as wellas from home, nursing homes, assisted living facilities, home health agencies, skilled nursing facilities, and long term acute care hospitals.

If you are interested in determining if you or yourloved one has a condition that meets the inpatientrehabilitation criteria, please contact the staff ofUMRH at (225) 450-2775. You will be put intouch with a clinical liaison who can answer any ofyour questions and can arrange for an assessment.Most assessments can be done within two hours ofinitial contact, and if your condition does not meetmedical necessity for acute inpatient rehabilitationthe staff can recommend the next appropriate levelof care for your condition. One call could changeyour life for the better.

Hospital Medicine Group includes (pictured from left to right): Dr. Peter J. Monteyne, MD specializing in family medicine, Dr. Mohammed Saeed, MD, FACP, CMD board certified in geriatric and internal medicine, Dr. Lisa A. Diehl, MD specializing in family medicine and physical medicine and rehabilitation,

and not pictured is Dr. Rao R. Narra, MD specializing in internal medicine.

We at United MedicalRehabilitation Hospital in

coordination with St. Elizabethphysicians are raising the standardof care for the Gonzales area andits surrounding communities byimplementing best care practices

and by introducing a COMPREHENSIVE GERIATRICASSESSMENT PROGRAM.

We are confident that we will bethe FIRST CHOICE forQUALITY STROKE and

REHABILITATION SERVICES.

Dr. Mohammed Saeed, MD, FACP, CMD

COME AS A PATIENT, LEAVE AS FAMILY.

333 East Worthey Road, Gonzales 225.450.2775www.umrhospital.com

Join Us for Our Open House Wednesday, May 21from 4:00pm to 6:30pm. Catered, Giveaways,

Facility Tours.

FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL 225.450.2775

Residents of AscensionParish now have the opportunity to stay in

Gonzales to receive qualityinpatient rehabilitative

services at United MedicalRehabilitation Hospital.Dr. Gertrude Gertie Anyanwoke, MD,

Infectious Disease Associates, located on Hwy 30, Gonzales, LA

ysician Specialists Approach e/CRRN

Management s) All Private Rooms

Celebrating 6 Years of Commitment to Service in the Dutchtown Community

Chase Roy, PT, DPT

We are Your Community Physical Therapy ProviderSpecializing in Orthopedic Physical Rehabilitation

36501 Mission Street, Suite A (Inside Fusion Health & Fitness) Prairieville, Louisiana 70769

225.744-3631 Fax 225.744.3647

Chase Roy, PT, DPT, is a certified Dry NeedlingPhysical Therapist who usesTrigger Point Dry Needling(TDN) to give patients longlasting pain relief. TriggerPoint Dry Needling is an extremely effective technique that uses fine filament needles to "deactivate" or "shut down"painful or knotted areas inyour muscles.

HOW DOES TRIGGER POINTDRY NEEDLINGWORK?

TDN is a treatment for muscular tightness andspasm, which commonly follows injuries and oftenaccompanies the degenerative process. Small, thin needles areinserted in the muscles atthe trigger points causingthe pain. When a needle tiphits a trigger point, a localtwitch in the muscle isnoted by the therapist andthe patient. Dry needling

stimulates certain neurological sensors in thebody, which modulatepain signals. Once the

twitch response is elicited,it may mechanically

disrupt the contracted nature of the trigger

point, which in turn, promotes positive local biochemical changes and

results in increased blood flow to the area.

WHAT TYPE OFPROBLEMS CAN BETREATED BY TDN?

Muscle dysfunction can be the primary or secondary contributing factor to many conditions. Someconditions that have beeneffectively treated by usingthe DRY NEEDLING treatment include:

Repetitive stress injuries Muscle tendonitis Neck pain Headaches Back pain Sciatica SI Joint Dysfunction Muscle strains Frozen shoulder Patellofemoral dysfunction Plantar fasciitis

IS THE PROCEDUREPAINFUL?

Most people do not feel theinsertion of the needle. The local twitch responsemay cause a very briefcramping or reproducesymptoms directly in the

muscle being treated. This is a good and desirablereaction because it confirms a possible source of dysfunction.

HOW LONG DOESIT TAKE FOR THIS PROCEDURETO WORK?

In some cases, decreasedpain and improved functionare immediate. Usually, itmay take a few treatmentsessions for a lasting positive effect.

If you have had problemswith a condition that TDNmay help, please feel free tocontact our office for a consultation or inform your physician about thistreatment option.Incorporating the treatmenttechnique with other manualand rehabilitative methods isproving to be very effectivein treating various injuriesand conditions.

TRIGGER POINT DRY NEEDLING AT DUTCHTOWN PHYSICAL THERAPY WHAT IS IT AND CAN IT HELP YOU?

Good Luck and Congratulations to All the Parish Seniors and a Special Congrats to the Senior Class of Dutchtown High School

Now and then there is a person born who is so unluckythat he runs into accidents whichstarted out to happen to somebody else. Don Marquis.

In Al Capps classic comic stripLil Abner, there was a character named Joe Btfsplk whowas the worlds worst jinx.Hard-luck Joe brought such disastrous misfortunes everywhere he went that a small, dark rain cloud perpetuallyhovered over his head.

Capp even suggested that Joeslast name (Id like to buy avowel, Vanna.) be pronouncedlike the derisive raspberry spitting sound of the Bronxcheer.

Because of recent events, Ihave found myself glancing skyward over my size 7 cranium to see if theres not ablack cloud following mearound.

Now when I think of reallybad luck characters (besides Joe),there are several movie guys thatcome to mind immediately. Ted(Ben Stiller) in Somethingabout Mary gets a body partcaught in a pants zipper on promnight-now thats really hard luck.

Mr. Rooney (Jeffrey Jones),the principal in Ferris Buellertries to match wits with theworlds luckiest teenager andends up muddy, bloody, bittenby a dog, kicked in the face andriding the bus.

And dont forget Bobby (NedBeatty) in Deliverance whogets lost in the woods and hearsthose immortal words, Youdone took a wrong turn, from apair of mountain men who liketo hear intruders squeal like apig while certain unmention-

ables are going on.And I dont think Im quite as

unlucky as some other snake-bit-ten cartoon characters like poorole Charlie Brown who never gotto kick that football or Kennywho died in every episode ofSouth Park or Wile E. Coyotewho despite a myriad of Acmeproducts could never quite catchthat Roadrunner.

No, Im certainly not in thesame ballpark as those guys. ButI do have a history of buzzardsluck (Cant kill nothing-noth-ing wont die.) dating back tomy early years.

At the age of 3 I had a rockinghorse that died. At the age of 9,I swore a curse on the

Milwaukee Braves (Sorry, Mack.)for beating my beloved Yankeesin the 1957 World Series. ThenI listened in disbelief as thePirates Hard Luck HarveyHaddix pitched a perfect gamefor 12 innings against the Bravesonly to lose the game in whereelse-the 13th inning on a homerun by former LSU great Joe Bill Adcock.

My favorite golfer of the 80sand 90s was Greg Norman whowas surgically removed of allgood fortune at birth. Howmany Sundays did I watch as theShark lost tournaments to a 140-foot chip shot (87 Masters),a hole-out from a bunker on thelast hole (86 PGA) or just tookmatters into his own fins andblew a 6-shot lead in the finalround (96 Masters).

Legendary sportswriter JimMurray once wrote thatNormans luck was so bad thathe was the kind of man whowould stand in line to get ticketson the Titanic.

Anyway, when I start thinkingthat my lucks never going tochange, I usually resort to mymailbag for some positive vibes.But as you will witness, that did-nt help much either as the firstcorrespondence began

Dear Black Cat Bill,I know youre part of a group

that goes on a golfing extrava-ganza every time this year. Howdid that Florida trip go duringthis stormy spring?

Day LugeDear Day,

Just a friendly travel tip foryou-When you leave for a Floridavacation on a Wednesday

morning and the chick on theWeather Channel announces, Ifyoure headed for the Pensacolaarea, dont go! you know youreprobably in trouble.

Pegram Mire and PeteRobbinss April golf retreat toDestin is second only to theMasters as a hackers annual riteof spring. But when MotherNature intervenes with the worstflooding in 100 years in theFlorida Panhandle, you have towonder if someone in the groupof 30 is not a jinx of some kind.

Most of the merry-but soggy-band stopped at the Mississippiborder to regroup after learningthe Interstate was closed east ofMobile. Through some quickthinking by my former catcherMike Lee-who learned to handleadversity in high school baseballwhile his coach was going topieces-we got tee times at a nicecourse called the Preserve inGautier.

We finally made it to the condos in Destin late that night,

but golf anywhere within a 100-mile radius was out of thequestion. So it was a 2-hourdrive back to Gulf Shores to playthe miraculously dry CraftFarms. On Friday we finally gotto play Kelly Plantation in Destinwith carts on path and a funnymarshal who guided us aroundflooded areas with quips like,Weve only lost a couple golfersto the gators on this hole.

Saturday was the kind of dayyou usually expect for a Floridagolf outing-bluebird skies anddry fairways and a good time was had by all despite the adjustments.

But I cant really say we hadbad luck when you think of peo-ple on their second-floor balconywaiting to be rescued after 22 inches in 24 hours.

My second letter was on afamiliar topic

Dear Black Cat Bill,How did that betting a

C-note on horses whose namesstart with C work out for you in the Derby?

C.U. Laker

Well, Black Cat didnt wait forthe actual race for his Derby jinxto kick in as two of his Cs-Constitution and Cairo Princewent down with injuries duringworkouts and didnt even make itto the gate. Hindsight being 20-20, I should have just stuckwith my double Cs-CaliforniaChrome and CommandersCurve who ran 1-2 for an exactaof $342. But greed is a terriblething and I went for the bigbucks of a trifecta and a superfecta with a box thatincluded the top two horses,another C horse-Candy Boy-and a tribute to the BostonMarathon-Wicked Strong.

Alas, Candy Boy took morelicks than an all-day sucker onthe first turn and finished-whereelse-13th. Wicked Strong gotwithin a length of third despitebreaking from the impossible 20hole and got fourth giving me a1-2-4 finish in the tri. That ticket and three sawmill dollarswill get you a cold beer atSammys Grill. Tell em I sent you.

Oh, by the way, the horse thatcame in third to beat me out ofthe $1500 was named Danza-which is why I will never watchTaxi or Whos the Boss?reruns again.

And one letter on a not-so-familiar subject

Dear Black Cat Bill,Say it aint so, Black Cat.

If It Wasnt for Bad Luckor Black Cat Bill Goes Postal

by Bill Delaune

26

27

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I heard from some unreliablesources at Southpaws that youwere betting on soccer. I knewyou were a degenerate but youdont know a keeper from astriker. Whats next-AustralianFootball?

Dingo Starr

Dear Dingo,Well, you busted me. After

watching some of the local hooligans (a.k.a.-my honky tonkheroes) get all excited over aChelsea match, I decided to lay afew pounds down on Liverpoolbecause thats where the Beatleswere from. Liverpool jumpedout to a 3-0 lead which I wastold was comparable to a 5-touchdown lead in football and Imade the mistake of laughing atthe half.

Of course, the other teamcame back to tie the game costing me my wager on thatgame and a futures bet on theleague championship whichLiverpool lost by one point toManchester City.

Apparently, my bad luck tran-scends oceans.

At least the last letter endsthings on a happier note

Dear Black Cat Bill, My grandfather says that you

and he were at the very firstJambalaya Festival in 1968.How can that be when you told

me you were only 45 years oldthe other night?

Tempest Storm.

Well, Tempest, we BabyBoomers get to knock 20 yearsoff our chronological age as areward for surviving the 60s.So yes-I was definitely at the firstfestival with a bunch of peoplesgrandparents. And I intend tobe at the 47th one this year onMemorial Day Weekend.

Just make sure that if yourecooking-dont let old Black Catto close to your black pot!

Epilog-Sometimes a bit of bad luck endsup being good luck. When mywife and I had the misfortune ofa flat tire a couple of miles shortof the Highland Road exit lastSaturday, a nice man named CarlDavis stopped to help us. NowCarl had a few things I did notpossess-the knowledge and talentto change the tire, his own toolsand the courage to do the workwith I-10 traffic blowing by atwarp speed. Carl, who works atFisher Services in Gonzales,made short work of the job-withtime to spare.

Thanks to Carl, who actuallypractices the idea of helping others instead of just giving it lipservice. And I wish him lots ofluck-as long as its not mine!

28

OdditiesI came across a photo Janet

took of me when I was visitingher in Colorado. She capturedme turning around to the surprise of a giant Moose. Iremembered that I was shockedat the shear size of the beast.Wow look at that animal.

Then it entered my mine. Iwonder what Moose wouldtaste like. How would you cookit? What do you make, MooseStew? Not to be confused withMoo Shoo. However, it is funto say, Moose Moo Shoo. Saythat three times.

I also remembered thinking ifthese creatures roamed thelands of the Oxford HuntingClub, I may be the camp cook alittle more often.

I was driving around theother day and came across abeer cap I had put in my ashtray. After a brief moment ofwonder I remembered the caps story.

I have to take you back intime to start this story. Thispast year I played golf in theShout Out Tournament. WildBill from Prairieville hitched aride with me. At the end of theday we were putting our golfclubs back into the car. As weemptied our pockets of tees andmarkers Bill pulled out a MillerLite beer cap. I think it mayhave been his lucky marker forthe day. Didnt think muchabout it as he sat the cap on thetop of the bumper by

the tailgate.The next day I went to take

my golf clubs out of the back ofmy car and noticed that beercap was still sitting there. I haddriven from LaPlace toPrairieville and the cap hungtight. I dint touch it and drovearound for a week. Cap stayedthere. I was like I had a newpet. I talked to hit. Still here?Well Im driving to the huntingcamp this weekend so hangon.

I loaded up to head for thecamp. I talked to the cap again,Good Luck with me traveling70 mph for 4 hours?

I got to the camp hunted for3 days and when I was packingup to leave I looked down andthat cap was still there. I hadforgot about it and knew itmust be gone.

Now the cap has made allthese trips and hasnt moved Iknew someone was pulling atrick on me so I went to pick itup. It lifted perfectly. I sat it

back down and said, GoodLuck?

I drove 4 hours back home.The cap made it. I drovearound for a week and that capstill stayed there. It was weird.

I was sitting at a red light byAirline and I hear the squellingof tires and bammm. A younggirl crashed into me while shewas texting. Crap. I need thiscar. Surprising enough sheturned enough to mess her carup bad but hit my trailer hitchand I had little damage. Then Isaw it. The cap was wedgedbetween my bumper and tailgate.

I saved that cap and its in myash tray as a lucky charm. Then

I had a thought. It is wellknown pets resemble their masters and who was the masterof this cap. Sweet William. Do Iwant to keep it around as alucky charm? Its well knownaround the club house if Billpicks a golfer to win. Pickanother guy. The cap has takenon his character. Its a bit rustyand bent. One minute retiredteacher and then hes back exspanding minds. Scary? WildBill is my friend but if I keep itwill he keep hanging around.Probably. Ill see him next weekon the golf course. I have agood luck charm for you.

Thoughts from Bully

DavisPlumbing Repair LLC

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37 Years Experience

The Pesky Beer Cap

29

Useless Random Factswith Kellie

No other month begins or ends on the same day of

the week as May in any year. January of the following year always begins and ends on the same

day of the week as May of the current year.

May 1 is the feast of St. Joseph the worker in theRoman Catholic calendar. In the Catholic Church

the month of May is dedicated to and honors the Blessed Virgin Mary.

Butterflies range in size from a tiny 1/8 inch to

a huge almost 12 inches.

The city of Venice stands on about 120 small islands.

The original story from Tales of 1001 ArabianNights begins, Aladdin was a little Chinese boy.

The Hawaiian alphabet has only 12 letters.

Salt Lake City has a law against carrying an

unwrapped ukulele on the street.

A snail can have 25,000 teeth.

No matter where you stand in Michigan, you arenever

more than 85 miles from a Great Lake.

A healthy (non-colorblind) human eye can distinguish between 500 shades of gray.

Shakespeare invented the word assassination and bump.

For every 230 cars that are made, 1 will be stolen.

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A f t e r t h e F e s t i v a l

30

It was at least fifteen or moreyears ago that a guest speaker atan East Ascension SportsmanLeague meeting announced thatour nation would increase cornproduction to unheard of pro-portions. I don't rememberwhich organization (DucksUnlimited, Delta Waterfowl,Dept of Wildlife and Fisheries,etc.) the speaker represented.His main concern was that thisincrease in corn production forethanol fuel would create moreclearing of wildlife habitat in thefuture. At that time I had a dif-ferent approach to the increaseof corn production. Others andmyself figured that since deer,turkeys, doves, ducks, geese andother wildlife all love corn, thiswould increase wildlife andwaterfowl numbers. Boy, was Iso wrong and he was so right.Not only did ethanol fuel pro-duction lead to more habitatclearing, it also lead to increasedprices of all corn products. Italso left us with a fuel that canseverely harm most smallengines.

I'm a slow learner, that's forsure. After paying the cost toclean ethanol from two out-board motors and two four-wheelers, I've learned not touse ethanol fuel in those typesof engines. The thing that stillpuzzles me is the number ofpeople that still don't get it. Ihear it all the time, my genera-tor won't run, my lawnmowerbroke, I don't know what'swrong with my four-wheeler,I've got to bring my boat to theshop, my go-devil engine won'tidle right. My reply to thesestatements are, "It's the ethanolgas that you're using that'scausing you problems".Theirreply is usually, "You think so?".

Although I've read manytimes how the chemical break-down of ethanol affects plasticfilters, rubber hoses and smallengine parts, I cannot remem-ber all of that technical informa-

tion. I am educated enough toremember how the pieces ofplastic from my four-wheelergas filter looked in the mechan-ics hand that day. Especially as Iplaced two hundred dollars inhis other hand for the secondtime. Hard learner. Yep. Notany more.

Today's automobiles aredesigned for ethanol, althoughyou get better gas mileage fromethanol free gas. Cost-wise,people in the know say they'llcome out ahead until the costof regular gas is thirty centsmore per gallon versus the costof ethanol. It's gotten to thepoint that if I can't find ethanolfree gas for my boat or fourwheeler, I just won't go.Continue using it and you'lleventually miss a trip or twoanyway. Presently more fuel sta-tions in our area are supplyingethanol free gas. If you godown south toward the coast, inboat country, ethanol free gas ismore readily available. Thatshould tell you something. If itdoesn't, then don't feel bad.Our government doesn't get iteither. They now want toincrease the ethanol additivefrom ten percent to fifteen percent per gallon!!!....

Until next time,

Fill her up,(With ethanol free fuel)

James "Goosie" Guice

Ethanol Gash

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Locally Owned & Operated by Oscar, Linda, Dean & Neal Mire

Call for Appointment

225.445.3635

ON-SITE TIRE REPAIR

hair forumhair forumS A L O N

Committedto HealingHair & Planet Earth

LANZAsProducts &ActionsPromoteAHealthy &SustainnableEarth.

6 2 2 . 2 1 8 3

24 Hr. Emergency Roadside Service

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The only thing better than Skid Marks Tire Pros and their Four locations is High School athletics.

These Kids Are Good!1312 WEST HWY. 30, GONZALES 225-647-9631 11209 COURSEY BLVD., BATON ROUGE 225-368-1234 1015 WEST LEE DRIVE, BATON ROUGE 225-767-5008 1800 SOUTH RANGE AVE. DENHAM SPRINGS 225-664-8103

D u t c h t o w n S t a t e P l a y o f f s

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The only thing better than Skid Marks Tire Pros and their Four locations is High School athletics.

These Kids Are Good!1312 WEST HWY. 30, GONZALES 225-647-9631 11209 COURSEY BLVD., BATON ROUGE 225-368-1234 1015 WEST LEE DRIVE, BATON ROUGE 225-767-5008 1800 SOUTH RANGE AVE. DENHAM SPRINGS 225-664-8103

E a s t A s c e n s i o n S t a t e P l a y o f f s

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The only thing better than Skid Marks Tire Pros and their Four locations is High School athletics.

These Kids Are Good!1312 WEST HWY. 30, GONZALES 225-647-9631 11209 COURSEY BLVD., BATON ROUGE 225-368-1234 1015 WEST LEE DRIVE, BATON ROUGE 225-767-5008 1800 SOUTH RANGE AVE. DENHAM SPRINGS 225-664-8103

S t . A m a n t S t a t e P l a y o f f s

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Opened on May 28th 1964Frank Dedman, Sr. was working ata drug store when he was in histeens dipping ice cream. MrsHopper, owner of Hoppers driveins, was impressed with his workand offered him a job at hoppersmaking twice his salary. As hegrew up in Hoppers he becamemanager/operator. He then wasoffered stock to buy in that company. Hoppers is where hegained his experience of hard

work and dictation will gain yousuccess. This still is our motto tothis day.

Sr, then sold his stock back toHoppers and opened his owndrive in business May 28th 1964.His life long dedication to thedrive in business allowed him andhis wife Carolyn to open threeBlue Bird Drive Ins in BatonRouge. They were located onAirline Hwy, Scenic Hwy & Plank

Rd. His drawing card in the1960s and 1970s was his homemade ice cream, hamburgersand po-boys.

During the early 1970s drive inbusiness was going by the wasteside and Sr. decided to modify hiscompany to a breakfast and luncheatery. Specializing in homemadebiscuits. It took him over one

year to perfect his biscuit recipeand then the renaming of Bluebird became Franks Restaurant in1972. Our company went fromIce cream to biscuits. To this dayour motto is the best homemadebiscuits in the world.

During the 60s 70s & 80s Sr.taught his four children, JanetHodges, Deborah Dedman,Cheryl Salter and Frank Dedmanjr, the ins and outs of the company. Teaching them to workhard and strive for success in whatever path they may take in life.

MEETING ROOMS OUTDOOR PAVILION

Frank Dedman Jr.Owner Biscuit Master

Ross DedmanNight Time Manager

Frank Dedman IIIDay Manager

Franks Restaurant and Smoke HouseCelebrates 50 Years

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Frank Jr and his wife CatherineDedman, went into business withFrank Sr and Carolyn Dedman 1981.Sr was now on his way to teach Jr andhis wife Cathy how to take over thebusiness and continue his legacy ofowning and running a success eatery.Through the years Sr. and Jr. workedside by side shaking those hands ofour dedicated customers, feedingthem a wonderful homemade mealand thanking them and hoping theywould return. Keeping our customershappy and satisfied was our goal. Ourcustomers are the ones taking care ofus to feed OUR families.

During the late 80s Jr and his wife

started taking over the runnings ofthe company and made additions thatwould take it to the next generation.A smokehouse was born next door tothe existing restaurant. Turkeys,hams, briskets, sausages & much morewere added to the lunch menus andthen catering with delivery was born.We started making our own sausagesand boudin. You cant get that anywhere in Baton Rouge at that timeespecially at a restaurant for breakfast.

1999 Sr.and Carolyn retired and jrand Cathy were set free on their ownto continue the legacy of FranksRestaurant. Jr & Cathys children,Jennifer, Frank III & Ross were already born and the next generation

was being taught the ropes of therestaurant business. Our childrengrew up in the company just like I didstarting washing dishes and busingtables. We taught our children thesame thing my parents taught me;work hard, be dedicated and successwill come your way in which everdirection you may go. Didnt realizeALL our children would be interestedin carrying on the business!

During the years of 2000 - 2014 wetaught our three children how to runour successful restaurant. Now thecompany is teaching its third generation. Brent Guerin, Jennifershusband, also jumped on board andwas interested in joining the family

team. Well now our company has alot of family members to have to support. This is when Jr. and Cathydecided to open an additional restaurant in Prairieville, Louisiana.

With the support of our children andnow son in law, we opened a newadventure. Franks Smokehouse andCatering facility in Prairieville. FrankIII runs the day to day operations ofFranks in Prairieville and Ross manages the night shift. Brent runsthe Baton Rouge location. Jennifertakes care of all the clerical, businessand payroll operations. Jr and hiswife Cathy advises with them on theday to day operations. We tell ourchildren to be all that they can be;give great food and excellent service;work hard and be dedicated to your job.

Now we are approaching 50 years in business. Wow this is an accomplishment. Our company went from Ice Cream to Biscuits toSmokehouse to Reception center.Our family is a very close and religious family. We go to church and thank God that he helps direct us in making the right decisions from day to day.

Frank Dedman, Jr.

17425 AIRLINE HWY PRAIRIEVILLE 225.673.8876 frankscypresshall.com

Brent GuerinDay Manager, Baton Rouge

Cypress Hall

Frank Sr. and Frank Jr. baking their world best biscuits.

Front Row - Brent , Jennifer, Frank III, RossBack Row - Frank Jr., Cathy, Carolyn, Frank Sr.

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VFW HOST JAMBALAYA COOK-OFFTA Jambalaya Cook Off atGonzales Memorial Veterans OfForeign Wars (VFW) Post 3693as the First of an Annual Event.The VFW wanted to give jambalaya cooks a great location and timely event tohone their skills in preparationfor the Jambalaya FestivalMemorial Day Weekend. Thecontest had a good turn out forthe first year. The VFW hasalready heard of a larger groupready for next year.

The funds raised go to supporting deployed soldiersthrough packages of suppliesthey request through our contacts with the units in different theaters of

operation. Most of the soldierswe support are local toAscension Parish either withNational Guard units are individually deployed as part ofan active unit in one of ourbranches of service.

A big thanks goes out toLayne's Jewelry and Design forsponsoring the event.

The Winners:Burner Division:

1st place- Austin King2nd place- Daryn Heath3rd place- Chase Leblanc

Brad RobinsonMark Babin

Wood fire Division:

1st place- Woody Woodward2nd place- Jay Alexis3rd place- Kevin Frederick

Other participants:

Kenny GomezTunney KingDean FolksKenny"West Bank" BarrasBuster MelanconTyler BourqueCoco WilsonLonnie GautreauJames "Stump" Marchand

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PrepFitnessPrep Fitness held a RibbonCutting Ceremony onWednesday, March 26, 2014,announcing the opening oftheir location at 36546 MissionSt, Prairieville, LA 70774.Every single day, as an athletein the sport of life, you have toperform. Whether its at work,at home or at play. If yourenot in shape, you cant performwell. If youre injured becauseof your training you cant per-form at all. Our training isdesigned to PREP you forthe rigors of your everydaydemands by first minimizingthe risk of injury, then improving functional abilities.We apply a Quality beforeQuantity approach to any program our clients participatein. To ensure our training

adheres to our philosophy, theFMS is the foundation of all ofour training. It provides uswith both a risk analysis of eachclient and a blueprint to themost beneficial and efficientpath to improved performance. Attending the ribbon cuttingfor Prep Fitness were: OwnerJordan Aucoin; AscensionParish President TommyMartinez; Ascension Chamberof Commerce President/CEOSherrie Despino; AscensionChamber Members; ChamberAmbassadors; family andfriends.

If you would like more information on Prep Fitness,please call 225-673-1984 orvisit www.prepfitness.com. For more information on theAscension Chamber ofCommerce, please visitwww.ascensionchamber.com, e-mailinfo@ascensionchamber.com orcall (225) 647-7487.

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Hi, Im Cooper.My Mom is Kellie. She writes the article inthis magazine, Useless Random Facts.

She got married. Ihad to go. Iobserveredsome useless random facts at the wedding

and thought Id share.

I heard a guy ask Granny if she was Mamas sister. How dumb is that?

The brooms cake is a trick. That wasnt areal knife and you shouldnt touch it or get

your hand slapped.

Did you know the flower girl, Addison, wassmarter than all the adults. The adults told

here to get rid of the flower pedals a coupleat a time. She knew that would take toolong so she dumped the entire basket atonce. Booya. Thats some smart thinking.

Granny used some packing tape to fix Moms dress and her girls.

I didnt know I had any sisters.

Apparently it is OK to chew with your

mouth open andtalk with yourmouth full at weddings.

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COME JOIN OUR AZALEA FAMILY

Celebrating Mothers DayAzalea has been a big blessing in dealing with my in-laws! The care my in-laws have received has gonebeyond our expectations. There is not a word thatdescribes our gratitude. Thank you.

My mom has been a resident for over five years and weare very pleased with the facility, the people and thewhole experience. Thank God for Azalea Estates.

The fun and caring employees at The Azalea Estates retirement /assisted living community in Gonzales, LA makes living for those in need of assistance a true blessing.

2305 S . Purpera Avenue, Gonzales , LA 70737225.644.1028

EATEL APPOINTSNEW GENERALCOUNSEL WITHPROMOTIONFROM WITHIN

With 16 years of service to thecompany, Janet Britton has beenpromoted to the position ofGeneral Counsel at EATEL.Britton will now be responsiblefor guiding EATEL through acomplex myriad of legal andregulatory issues. Janet has beenin the telecommunications sector for over two decades.Prior to joining EATEL, shewas a staff attorney with theLouisiana Public ServiceCommission.

Janet is past chairman of theLouisiana TelecommunicationsAssociation (LTA) and is cur-rently a board member. She isalso a former board member forthe Organization for thePromotion and Advancement ofSmall Telephone Companies(OPASTCO) and former chairman of the NTCA - theRural Broadband Association'sMembership Committee.Currently, Janet is on theNTCA - the Rural BroadbandAssociation's Industry andRegulatory Policy Committee,is a board member of theAscension Chamber ofCommerce, is a member of theCity of Gonzales IndustrialDevelopment Board, and isChairman of the East Ascension

East Iberville Catholic SchoolPartnership.

Janet holds a Bachelors of Artdegree, a Juris Doctorate and aMasters of BusinessAdministration from LouisianaState University.

With Janets legal and regula-tory background, she has notonly helped EATEL navigatethese uncertain times, but hasalso brought our industrysissues to the forefront with ourstate and federal associations,says Arthur Smokey Scanlan,EATEL Chief Executive Officerand Treasurer. She is an expertin state and federal regulatoryissues representing us and theindustry in many differentfacets. Im proud to have herleading us through these times.

About EATELEATEL, founded in 1935 and head-quartered in Gonzales, Louisiana, is aleading telecommunications serviceprovider of Internet, TV, phone, MetroEthernet, and cloud-based solutions.EATEL was one of the first companiesin the country to build its own 100%fiber network, and is currently continu-ing to expand the same type ofadvanced all-fiber network in the BatonRouge area. EATEL recently acquiredprivately-held Venyu Solutions Inc., anational provider of data centers, man-aged hosting, cloud virtualization, anddata protection solutions. EATELsother wholly-owned subsidiaries includeSunshine Media, a leading regional yel-low pages service provider, and VisionCommunications, a telecommunicationsservice provider in Lafourche Parish,Louisiana. For more information aboutEATEL, please visit www.eatel.com.

Prep Time: 30 minutes

Servings: 8 servings

Ingredients:

8 Fresh Roma Tomatoes

2 tsp Kosher Salt

1 Tbsp Cracked Black Pepper (fresh if available)

cup olive oil

2 boxes Boursin garlic & herb cheese

3 oz fresh bleu cheese crumbles

Method:

P r e - h e a t y o u r o v e n t o 4 5 0 d e g r e e s . Ve r yc a r e f u l l y s h a v e t h e b o t t o m o f t h e t o m a t o t oc r e a t e a f l a t s u r f a c e . C u t t h e t o p o f t h et o m a t o a n d u s i n g a m e l o n b a l l e r , c a r e f u l l yh o l l o w o u t t h e i n s i d e o f t h e t o m a t o . C o a tt h e t o m a t o e s i n o l i v e o i l a n d s p r i n k l e t h e mw i t h s a l t a n d p e j p p e r . I n a s e p a r a t e c o n t a i n e rc o m b i n e t h e B o u r s i n a n d b l e u c h e e s e t h e ns t u f f t h e t o m a t o e s . I n a n o v e n s a f e d i s h ,b a k e t h e t o m a t o e s f o r a p o x 1 0 m i n u t e s , o ru n t i l t h e c h e e s e s t a r t s t o b u b b l e . P r o m p t l yr e m o v e t h e t o m a t o e s f r o m t h e o v e n a n d a l l o wt o c o o l b e f o r e e n j o y i n g t h e m .

S e r v e a s a s i d e d i s h f o r h e a r t y m e a l s o r u s es m a l l e r t o m a t o e s a s a unique appetizer

Stuffed RomaTomatoes

Cooking Gourmet at Homewith SNOS SEAFOOD & STEAKS

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Executive Chef Ben Jarreau Hey Dr. Rob,I have a question,

after my nap.Me too,

after my nap.

AASSCCEENNSSIIOONN PPAARRIISSHH

AANNIIMMAALL HHOOSSPPIITTAALL222255 .. 774444..44990055

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Latils LandingHoumas House Plantation & Gardens

Invites You to Experience

OPEN DAILYDaily Tours:

Monday, Tuesday 9AM - 5 PM Wednesday-Sunday 9AM -7 PM

Cafe' Burnside: 11 AM- 2 PM dailyLatil's Landing:

Wednesday through Saturday 6 PM- 9 PM, Sunday Brunch 11 AM - 3 PM;

Reservations Required

Latils LandingR E S T A U R A N T

R I V E R R O A D , B U R N S I D E , L A 2 2 5 . 4 7 3 . 9 3 8 0 k k @ h o u m a s h o u s e . c o m

J e r e m y L a n g l o i s ,E x e c u t i v e C h e f