The “Text” CommandmentsHosted by Virginia Perry and Devon Davis

*With added notes from February 4, 2009Cell Phone Forum

Potential Dangers

▪ Pictures

▪ Mean texts

▪ Rumors

▪ DISTRACTION

▪ Embarrassment

▪ Trail of information

3 HoursAmount of time the average teen spends texting a day

What are the ADVANTAGES of cell phones at home?

Increases parent-child availabilityFrees up home phoneAdds security in case of emergency*Provides social network, cultural connectionsSome operate as calculator or GPSTeaches about technologyProvides opportunity to learn phone mannersProvides latitude, independenceAllows multi-taskingEncourages parents to get involved in child’s world (i.e. learning to text)Encourages parents to model phone manners and appropriate use

What are the DISADVANTAGES of cell phones at home?

Creates distractionsLeads to mistakes due to trying unsuccessfully to multi-taskLimits parental control, especially textingCreates vulnerability, example cyber-bullyingLimits manners, vocabulary, face-to-face social skillsCan cause loss of privacyGives false sense of being anonymous, taking inappropriate libertiesCan encourage group misbehavior*Causes peer pressure issuesCan open children to “sexting”Creates additional cost and supervision responsibilities for parents

What are the ADVANTAGES of cell phones at school?

Establishes convenient parent-child communicationSome have ability for note taking (smart phones)Provides opportunity to teach responsibility

What are the DISADVANTAGES of cell phones at school?

Limits community buildingCreates confusion, i.e. need to clarify and enforce rulesCreates distractions (I.e. texting on phone in one’s pocket)Lack of parental control

What guidelines do you have for your child’s cell phone use?

Not allowed to call or text after 9 pmUse only after homework is doneRules need to be clear and supported by teachers and parentsSpecific place to put phone when not in useHelp pay for monthly expenses

What phone guidelines did your parent(s) have for you, growing up?

Think about yourself at age 10, 11, 12, 13…did you have unlimited access to a phone? When were you allowed to use the phone (if at all)? Was the phone located in a central spot or were you able to have private conversations?

Junior High RulesCell phones may be used before and after school outside the building. Otherwise, they should be turned off and left in lockers during the school day. Violating the rules during school hours will result in the following:

FIRST OFFENSE: Phone will be confiscated and kept in the office for a day. Student given detention.

SECOND OFFENSE: Phone will be confiscated and sent home to parents. Parents will be notified that student cannot bring phone to school again.

Middle School Rules

Cell phones are not allowed in Middle School during school hours. If they are used or ring during school hours, the cell phone will be taken away and sent home at the end of the day. If there is a recurrence, we reserve the right to ask that the cell phone not return to school for the remainder of the academic year.

Ideal Home Rules

The rules that work for one family might not necessarily work for another. The most important thing to remember is that a cell phone is a privilege, not a right. If this privilege is abused, it should be removed. There are “parental controls” offered by the major carriers which offer copies of text messages, calling and texting time constraints, and calling and texting amount constraints.

1. Expense (who pays?)

2. Safety (e.g., driving)

3. Courtesy (not in school)

4. Discretion (watch what you say)

5. Kindness (F2F)

6. Overuse (“text thumb”)

When making your family’s rules, be sure to hit on these six ideas:

Anecdotes from Forum• 8th grader recently went $1200 over texting limit• Different 8th grader went hundreds of dollars over texting limit two months in a row• Virginia has seen Jr. High students taking pictures with phones over toilet stall doors • A number of examples of mean, hurtful texts sent between “friends” that turned into

major fights• Gossip spread quickly through use of texts• Kids admit to texting with phone in pocket or in lap during class• Has opened up one child’s social scene – gave him access to information on get-

togethers he was otherwise missing• 8th grade girl sleepover, mom alarmed to see them on Skype with boys from class• 6th grade mom told her child she would be reading texts – he now deletes them• 8th grade mom inadvertently saw text her child sent, was appalled at the language

used• At end of school day, kids pull out cell phones as they walk to bus or carpool – no eye

contact or communication• Child at boarding school where they don’t use cell phones all day – real sense of

community when walking around campus• Parents find it convenient to be able to call child to say they are running late• Texting has become what used to be note-writing in class