Leadership Communication Skills 18/3/2021
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Sam antha Young18 M arch 2021
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• Understand communication
• Verbal and non-verbal skills
• Assertiveness skills
• Strategies for dealing with Conflict, Criticism and
Giving Feedback
• Barriers to Effective Communication
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Objectives & Learning Outcomes
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COMMUNICATION
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• What is communication?• What methods do we use to communicate at work?
“Good communication is characterised by providing employees with information which they want and
getting information to them quickly and through the channels they prefer.”LOUIS I. GELFAND
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Communication
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The Communication Process
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Communication Struggles of Managers
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Employees want….
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Communication Exercise
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• Pick up your sheet of paper and hold it in front of you.
• Close your eyes and listen carefully to my directions.
• The rules are: (1) no peeking and (2) no questions.
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Communication Methods
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The method we choose depends on:
• WHAT we need to communicate?• WHO it needs to be communicated to?• WHY do they need the information?• WHERE are they based?• By WHEN do they need the communication?
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Factors Impacting Understanding of Message
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• Cultural diversity• Status differences (power)• Gender• Previous experiences• Level of interest• Speaking or writing abilities
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What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
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5 Principles of Human Communication
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1. Is not a thing, it is a process
2. Is not linear, it is circular
3. Is complex4. Is irreversible5. Involves the whole
personality
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Planning Your Message• Understand your objective - Why are you
communicating?• Understand your audience - With whom are you
communicating? What do they need to know?• Plan what you want to say, and how you'll send the
message.• Seek feedback on how well your
message was received.
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• Listening
• Positive mindsets
• Speaking
• Non-verbals
Effective Communication
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Email• A permanent record.• Avoid - slang, careless writing, thoughtless
comments, too many dots, bold, caps or!!!!!• Consider the recipient and who should be
copied.• Beware of humour and sarcasm.
Meetings• How many do you have a week?• How productive / effective are they?
Email & Meetings
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Jewellery Store ExerciseJ e w e lr y S t o r e
T h e S t o r y
A b u s in e s s p e r s o n w a s a b o u t to lo c k u p th e je w e l ry s to r e w h e n a m a n h o ld in g a b a g p u s h e d h isw a y in . H e d e m a n d e d t h a t o n e o f t h e je w e lr y c a s e s b e o p e n e d . T h e o w n e r u n lo c k e d th e je w e lr yc a s e , a n d i ts c o n te s t w e r e r e m o v e d . A d o g a p p e a r e d a n d b e g a n b a r k in g . T h e m a n r a n a w a y .
T r u e o r F a ls e
1 . T h e m a n p u s h e d h is w a y in b e fo r e t h e o w n e r lo c k e d t h e d o o r .
2 . T h e m a n w a s n o t c a r r y in g a n y t h in g .
3 . S o m e o n e t o o k je w e lr y o u t o f t h e ca s e .
4 . T h e s t o r y is a b o u t t w o p e o p le a n d a d o g .
5 . T h e s t o r e w a s p r o t e c te d b y a g u a r d d o g .
6 . T h e ro b b e r r a n a w a y .
7 . T h e m a n d e m a n d e d je w e lr y f r o m t h e o w n e r .
8 . S o m e o n e u n lo c k ed t h e jew e lr y c a s e .
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Non-Verbal Skills
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How Others Perceive You
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• Reinforce or modify what is said in words. • Convey information about their emotional
state.• Define or reinforce the relationship between
people.• Provide feedback to the other person.• Regulate the flow of communication.
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Non-verbal Communication
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•Maintaining eye contact.•Smiling (if appropriate) but especially as a greeting and when parting.
•Sitting squarely on a chair, leaning slightly forward.
•Nodding in agreement.•A firm handshake.•Presenting a calm exterior.•Looking interested.
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Positive Body Language
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Remember – some people havehabitual body language that
doesn’t actually tell you anything,but could be read as negative
Examples?
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Establishing a base line
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Body Language exercise
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• A nice smile• Scanning eye contact when talking to two or more people• Someone who doesn’t blink very much• Slight frown on their face when you are talking to them• Leaning forward to emphasise a point• Clenched fists• Looking at your watch• Hesitant, low volume voice• Twisting strands of hair• Hands on hips when talking• A strong smell of peppermint
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7 Cs of communication
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What are 3 things you are going to do to improve your Communication Skills?1.2.3.
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Communication Review
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ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS© Human Psychology 2021 All Rights Reserved
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Assertiveness skills
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• Are you able to be assertive at work and at home?• What does this mean?
• “A style of communicating with others to communicate our thoughts, feelings and beliefs in an open and honest manner without violating the rights of other people.”
• Why are we unassertive?• Being more assertive improves sense of
identity, confidence and self-esteem.
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Assertiveness
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• Say “no”• Be treated with respect• Express my needs, feelings, thoughts and ideas• Be proud of my accomplishments• Disagree in a respectful manner• Feel and express anger• Get help when I need it• Feel supported
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Bill of Rights
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Behaviours
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• A) Use the word 'I' as often as possible‒ I'm hurt that you haven't asked me how my day was. I'm
feeling a little shut down. Even better: I shut down when I'm not asked about my day.
• B) Describe the hurtful/problematic behaviour:‒ I get defensive when you ask me, “Why did you do that!"• C) Make a request:‒ I feel defensive when you say, "Why did you do that?" If
you're upset, I'd prefer it if you'd just say you're angry.
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ABC of Assertiveness
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• Simple strategy for maintaining the assertiveness structure across all situations:
• I feel A (feeling) when you do B (action). I'd feel better if C (request).
• Example: I'm hurt that you're walking away from me in the middle of my sentence. I'd feel better if you stayed until I finish.(or, to create a you-less statement):
• I feel A when B happens. I'd feel better if C.• Example: I feel hurt when people walk away when I'm talking. I'd
feel better if you stayed until I finish.
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ABC’s in Action
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“Through assertiveness we develop contact with ourselves and with others. We become real human beings with real
ideas, real differences…and real flaws. And we admit all of these things. We don’t try to become
someone else’s mirror. We don’t try to suppress someone else’s uniqueness. We don’t try to pretend that we’re
perfect. We become ourselves. We allow ourselves to be there.”
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Assertiveness is being real.
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Assertiveness Summary
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CONFLICT© Human Psychology 2021 All Rights Reserved
• A conflict is more than just a disagreement.• Conflicts continue to fester when ignored.• We respond to conflicts based on our
perceptions and personality.• Conflicts trigger strong emotions.• Conflicts are an opportunity for growth.
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Dealing with Conflict
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Conflict Responses
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Unhealthy Response Healthy ResponseAn inability to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other person
The capacity to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other person
Explosive, angry, hurtful, and resentful reactions
Calm, non-defensive, and respectful reactions
The withdrawal of love, resulting in rejection, isolation, shaming, and fear of abandonment
A readiness to forgive and forget, and to move past the conflict without holding resentments or anger
An inability to compromise or see the other person’s side
The ability to seek compromise and avoid punishing
The fear and avoidance of conflict; the expectation of bad outcomes
A belief that facing conflict head on is the best thing for both sides
The ability to resolve conflict effectively depends upon how well you can:
• Manage stress quickly while remaining alert and calm.
• Control your emotions and behaviour.• Pay attention to the feelings being expressed.• Be aware of and respectful of differences.
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Conflict Resolution
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Tips for Resolving Conflict
• Listen for what is felt as well as said.• Make conflict resolution the priority rather than
winning or "being right."• Focus on the present.• Pick your battles.• Be willing to forgive.• Know when to let something go.
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GIVING GOOD FEEDBACK
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Giving Good Feedback• Make it regular. • Do it immediately. • Be specific and clear in your communication. • Location is important. • Positive before negative.• Practice makes perfect.
“Feedback is probably the most cost effective performance management tool available”
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Giving Effective Feedback
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Feedback Questions• Do you tell people when they are doing a good job?• Do you give credit to people for their ideas? • Do you praise achievement of outcomes and expected behaviours?• Do you positively acknowledge creativity and improvement ideas? • Do you compliment people on their strengths?• Do you explain clearly and non-judgementally where a person’s performance is going off
course? Do you do this in a timely manner? • Do you coach people to facilitate them in finding creative solutions to their work problems? • Do you encourage your staff to give you feedback, so you can continually learn and grow as
a manager? • Do you actively listen and consider if there is some merit in the feedback you are receiving
from staff? Or do you react defensively? • Do you acknowledge what other people are trying to say to you with paraphrasing or
summarising? Do you seek to understand?
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• There’s no such thing as valuable feedback from someone you don’t trust
• Struggling employees already realise that they have a problem• The more you listen, the better employees think you are at giving
feedback• Most employees prefer corrective feedback to praise and recognition• The more confident you are, the more likely it is you prefer negative
feedback• Almost everyone loves receiving feedback, but hates giving it• Withholding negative feedback is really about protecting yourself (not
the recipient)
Feedback Facts
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How not to do it – Case Study
• Read the Case Study in your handouts• What is happening here?• What are the reasons for the conversation
escalating in to a confrontational meeting where the feedback is not heard and taken on board?
• What would you have said differently?
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BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION
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Barriers to Communication
• Jargon• Emotional barriers / taboos• Lack of attention, interest, distractions• Differences in perception / viewpoint• Physical barriers to non-verbal communication• Cultural differences• Expectations and false assumptions
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Perception
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Signs your Listening Needs Work• You’re easily distracted.• Your listening quotient is low: It’s hard for you to focus
on the present.• You might give advice too soon.• You may downplay others’ feelings.• You shun silence.• Do you talk significantly more than the other person
talks?
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What will you commit to do?
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SUMMARY• 2 things I will do to improve my communication
effectiveness:1.2.
• 2 things I will do to improve my Assertiveness skills:1.2.
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