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5/21/2018 Essay Format Concrete Details Commentary Mpp
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Essay Format-
Concrete Details and
Commentary Statements
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Concrete Detail (CD)
stuff from the storythe what ;
it can be quotation or paraphrase
facts; examples; illustrations;
evidence; support; plot
references; citations;
What really happened in the
story? ; play-by-play announcer
TERMS TO KNOW-
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Commentary(CM)
stuff from your head-
the so what?
- words with feelings behindthem that you can describe to
someone else; analysis;
interpretation; a charactersfeelings; opinion; inference;
insight; reasons; color
commentator
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Ratiothe amount of CD:CMin a body paragraph
In Standard English,the essay ratio is 1:2+
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Specific details that form thebackbone or skeleton of your
body paragraphs
Synonyms for concrete details
include: facts, examples,
quotations, specifics,
descriptions, illustrations,
support, proof
What ARE concrete details?
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WHEN should concrete details be written?
-Concrete details must be included in every essay
-Include enough concrete details to support each point(in general, three separate detailswill be the minimum
needed to support one point)
WHY should concrete details be written?
-To support your thesis
-To give reasons for your audience to agree
with your position
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HOW should concrete details
be written?
For beginners, include a minimum of two concrete
details to support each point you are trying to make.
Introduce your concrete detail with transition words
(workbook p.7), such as- For example
- Furthermore
- Finally
For intermediate writers, include a minimum of three
concrete details for every point
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Young children are difficult toteach, but they still like learning.
Their minds have not yet
developed the necessary skills to
solve complex or even simple
problems. Even so, they live
surrounded by unbounded
mysteries and wonder. We couldlearn about life from children.
-
http://www.uoflife.com/wc/creative/concrete.htm
Sample paragraph WITHOUT concrete details-
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Same piece WITH concrete details
Young children are difficult to teach, but they still love
learning. For example, when a toddler will experiment
with a model tool bench, he cannot grasp that thesquare peg will not fit into the round hole. He must try
to fit the peg himself, which results hours of fun. This
means that while he may not grasp a concept quickly, he
wants to understand it. Even when they are frustrated
by what they dont understand, toddlers live surrounded bywonder.A young child will reach out his arms to grab everything
within reach at a store, and those objects are immediately placed
in the mouth. This shows that toddlers have incredible curiosity.
Even when they dont understand the use for something, theirinstinct is to learn as much about it as possible. These examples
show a love of knowledge that comes through experimentation
rather than formal learning.
Thesis point Concrete detail(s) Commentary statement(s)
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Why can writing concrete details be SO HARD?
You have to have a purpose
know your thesis and understand it.
Each detail you choose should help
support that thesis
You have to do some research. If youre writing a
research paper, this is obvious.
If youre writing a literary analysis, this
means you go back to the text and look for
your specific examples.
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What concrete details ARE NOT-
Abstractyou can find them,
see them, touch them on a page
or take a photograph of them,
etc.
Generalyou should be as
specificas possible in your
writing
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Sentence #1 -Topic SentenceTS
Sentence #2CDstarts with
For example
Sentence #3CM - (This shows that)Sentence #4CM(This also show
that; This is because;
This is important because)
Sentence#5Concluding Sentence
CSSums it up and ties back to the
thesis (As a result)
One-Chunk Body Paragraph
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Chunk Paragraph with 3 details
Sentence #1 -Topic SentenceTS
Sentence #2CD 1
Sentence #3CM
Sentence #4CM
Sentence#5CD 2Sentence #6CM
Sentence #7CM
Sentence #8- CD 3
Sentence #9CM
Sentence #10CM
Sentence #11- Concluding Sentence
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Without homework on weekends, students wouldbe able to spend quality time alone. Forexample, someone could use the time to readwhat she likes to read. This could broaden herknowledge of a specific subject or just provide arelaxing activity. She could also spend timealone pursuing a hobby, like crafting. Personal
hobbies enrich life and provide opportunities todo for others, such as creating crafted gifts forfriends and family. In addition, time alone couldprovide a chance to catch up on much needed
sleep- to rejuvenate mind and body. As a resultof having time alone, a student could feel morepositive about and be better prepared for thenext week of school responsibilities