HABIT 4: T
HINK WIN-
WINL I F E I S
AN A
L L -YOU - CAN - E
AT BU F F E T
BELL RINGER: TIME WASTERS• When doing your homework last
night, I’m sure you recognized some activities that waste your time.
Name 10 time wasters• They do not have to be YOUR time
wasters. The list can include time wasters you see in other peoples’ lives.
REVIEW• Habit 1: Be Proactive• Habit 2: Begin With The End
In Mind• Habit 3: Put First Things First• Habit 4: Think Win-Win
THINK WIN-WINDefinition:
Have an everyone-can-win attitude
• Attitude towards life, mental frame of mind that says I can win and so can you
• No one is superior• No one is inferior• Win-Win is NOT:•Win-Lose• Lose-Win• Lose-Lose
WIN-LOSE: THE TOTEM POLE• Getting to the top at all costs• Very competitive• Examples:•Using others for your own gain• Trying to get ahead at the expense of another• Spreading rumors•Always insisting on getting your way•Becoming jealous when something good happens to someone else
LOSE-WIN: THE DOORMAT• Avoid confrontation
and take the blame to keep the peace.
• Doormat Syndrome• Give in to peer
pressure• Set low expectations
and compromise your standards
LOSE-LOSE: DOWNWARD SPIRAL• Revenge• I don’t care what happens to me, as long as ___________
doesn’t do well!
WIN-WIN: ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT BUFFET• There is plenty of success to go around• Examples:• Your best friend got accepted to the college you wanted to go to.
You didn’t make it. You are happy for your friend.• You want to go to dinner, your friend wants to see a movie. You get
takeout and rent a movie.• Compromise
WIN THE PRIVATE VICTORY FIRST• If you are extremely insecure, it is
hard to think win-win because you are threatened by others’ successes. You might get jealous easily.
• The foundation of a win-win attitude is personal security.
AVOID TUMOR TWINS• Competing and comparing can keep
you from thinking win-win• Competing can be healthy when you
compete against yourself or when it challenges you to reach and stretch and become your best
• Competing is bad when there is a win at any cost attitude or a fear of failure.
COMPARING• Comparing yourself can become an addiction• You feel superior one moment and inferior the
next moment.• Good comparing is comparing yourself against
your potential.
WIN-WIN• It is contagious!• Even though not everyone thinks win-
win or you’re not able to find a win-win situation, you should decide not to play or to walk away.
• Increase how much you think win-win because it will make you feel great!