How To Write an APUSH How To Write an APUSH Thesis Statement Thesis Statement

& & How to Tackle the Long How to Tackle the Long

EssayEssay

How the Long Essay is How the Long Essay is EvaluatedEvaluated

The Long Essay QuestionThe Long Essay Question

The AP U.S. History exam gives The AP U.S. History exam gives students a choice between two long-students a choice between two long-essay questions that focus on the essay questions that focus on the same thinking skill but may apply to same thinking skill but may apply to different time periods and thematic different time periods and thematic learning objectives. learning objectives.

You will have 35 minutes to answer You will have 35 minutes to answer the one question you select. the one question you select.

Criteria Criteria A. Argumentation A. Argumentation

Develop a thesis or relevant argument that addresses all Develop a thesis or relevant argument that addresses all parts of the question.parts of the question.

B. Use of Evidence B. Use of Evidence Support the thesis using specific evidence, clearly linked Support the thesis using specific evidence, clearly linked

to the thesis.to the thesis. C. Targeted Historical Thinking SkillC. Targeted Historical Thinking Skill

Each question will also assess an additional thinking skill, Each question will also assess an additional thinking skill, such as causation, comparison, continuity and change such as causation, comparison, continuity and change over time, or periodization.over time, or periodization.

D. Synthesis D. Synthesis Written answers need to synthesize the argument, Written answers need to synthesize the argument,

evidence, and context in a coherent and persuasive essay.evidence, and context in a coherent and persuasive essay.

Development of Essay Writing Development of Essay Writing SkillsSkills

You will most benefit from starting You will most benefit from starting the practice of writing AP history the practice of writing AP history essays as early as possible.essays as early as possible.

Instead of writing and rewriting Instead of writing and rewriting complete essays until all elements complete essays until all elements are mastered, break down the skills are mastered, break down the skills needed to write an effective AP needed to write an effective AP history essay into sequential steps. history essay into sequential steps.

Long Essay StepsLong Essay Steps

1. Analyze the Question1. Analyze the Question2. Organize the Evidence2. Organize the Evidence3. Develop the Thesis3. Develop the Thesis4. Write the Introductory Paragraph4. Write the Introductory Paragraph5. Write the Supporting Paragraphs 5. Write the Supporting Paragraphs

and Conclusionand Conclusion6. Evaluate Your Essay6. Evaluate Your Essay

1. Analyze the question1. Analyze the question Taking the time to consider what the question really asks is Taking the time to consider what the question really asks is

often overlooked in the rush to start writing. often overlooked in the rush to start writing. Stop and ask yourself, "What is the targeted historical Stop and ask yourself, "What is the targeted historical

thinking skill in the question? Causation? Comparison? thinking skill in the question? Causation? Comparison? Continuity and change over time? Periodization?" Continuity and change over time? Periodization?"

You might try reading over the question or prompt three You might try reading over the question or prompt three times. What is the key word(s) or phrase in the question? times. What is the key word(s) or phrase in the question? CIRCLE it. It could be verbs such as "analyze,“ "explain" or CIRCLE it. It could be verbs such as "analyze,“ "explain" or "support," "modify," or "refute." "support," "modify," or "refute."

All questions have one thing in common: They demand the All questions have one thing in common: They demand the use of historical thinking skills and analysis of the evidence. use of historical thinking skills and analysis of the evidence.

A long-essay answer will not receive full credit by simply A long-essay answer will not receive full credit by simply reporting information. Therefore, be on your guard for reporting information. Therefore, be on your guard for questions that start out with the verbs "identify" or questions that start out with the verbs "identify" or "describe." "describe."

Such a question is usually followed by "analyze“ or some Such a question is usually followed by "analyze“ or some other more demanding thinking skill.other more demanding thinking skill.

Example 1Example 1

Consider TWO of the following and analyze the Consider TWO of the following and analyze the ways in which each of the two has affected the ways in which each of the two has affected the identity of women in American society since 1940:identity of women in American society since 1940: Changing economic conditionsChanging economic conditions Rebirth of an organized women's movementRebirth of an organized women's movement Traditional definitions of women's rolesTraditional definitions of women's roles

For this essay, it is not enough simply to describe changing For this essay, it is not enough simply to describe changing economic conditions, women's organizations, and so on. economic conditions, women's organizations, and so on. You must also You must also analyze analyze the effects that two factors had on the effects that two factors had on the identity of women. Here is a reliable guideline for any the identity of women. Here is a reliable guideline for any AP essay question: AP essay question: If you think that you can write an essay If you think that you can write an essay without making some judgment that results in a thesis without making some judgment that results in a thesis statement, you have not understood the question.statement, you have not understood the question.

Example 2Example 2 Sometimes, two, three, or more aspects of a question may be embedded in one sentence, as in the following example. Sometimes, two, three, or more aspects of a question may be embedded in one sentence, as in the following example.

1.) What verb is used to assess your understanding of the topic? 1.) What verb is used to assess your understanding of the topic? 2.) What does the verb mean? 2.) What does the verb mean? 3.) What aspects of American politics are you being asked to evaluate?3.) What aspects of American politics are you being asked to evaluate? 4.) Upon which time period does the question ask you to focus?4.) Upon which time period does the question ask you to focus?

Evaluate the relative importance of domestic and foreign Evaluate the relative importance of domestic and foreign

affairs in shaping American politics in the 1790s.affairs in shaping American politics in the 1790s.

This question asks the student to deal with This question asks the student to deal with BOTH BOTH domestic domestic AND AND foreign foreign affairs. Failing to deal with both parts of the question will result in a affairs. Failing to deal with both parts of the question will result in a lower grade. lower grade.

Break it down like so:Break it down like so:

Try it with this example!Try it with this example!

““The South never The South never had a chance to had a chance to win the Civil win the Civil War.” Support, War.” Support, modify, or refute modify, or refute this statement?this statement?

  

Discuss the political, Discuss the political, economic and social economic and social reforms introduced reforms introduced in the South between in the South between 1864 and 1877. To 1864 and 1877. To what extent did what extent did these reforms these reforms survive the survive the Compromise of Compromise of 1877?1877?

2.) Organize the Evidence2.) Organize the Evidence Many students start writing their answers to an essay Many students start writing their answers to an essay

question without first thinking through what they know, question without first thinking through what they know, and they often write themselves into the proverbial and they often write themselves into the proverbial corner. corner.

Directions for the AP History exam advise students to Directions for the AP History exam advise students to spend some time planning before starting to write an spend some time planning before starting to write an essay.essay. 1.) Identify what you know about the question and organize your 1.) Identify what you know about the question and organize your

information by making a brief outline of what you know. information by making a brief outline of what you know. 2.) Write your outline in the test booklet. 2.) Write your outline in the test booklet. 3.) List facts pertaining to the question to help organize your 3.) List facts pertaining to the question to help organize your

thoughtsthoughts 4.) Ask yourself, do I have enough evidence to support my thesis? It 4.) Ask yourself, do I have enough evidence to support my thesis? It

is obviously not very productive to select an essay or take a position is obviously not very productive to select an essay or take a position that you cannot support. that you cannot support.

ExampleExampleQuestion: Evaluate the relative importance of domestic and foreign affairs in shaping American politics in the 1790s.

Domestic Affairs Foreign Affairs Politics-Hamilton's financialplan: national debt, tariff, excise tax,

-Bank of the U.S.

-Constitution:loose vs. strictinterpretation-Whiskey Rebellion

-Alien and SeditionActs

-French Revolution

-British vs. French

-Proc. of Neutrality

-Citizen Genet

-Jay Treaty

-Pinckney Treaty

-Washington's FarewellAddress

-XYZ Affair

-Convention of 1800

-President WashingtonJefferson vs. Hamilton

-Two-party system

-Election of 1796

-Revolution of 1800

3. Develop a Thesis3. Develop a Thesis A strong thesis is necessary in every APUSH essay answer. A strong thesis is necessary in every APUSH essay answer.

You must take a position on the question being asked!You must take a position on the question being asked! Feel free to disagree. Go in the direction where the majority of the Feel free to disagree. Go in the direction where the majority of the

evidence takes you. evidence takes you. Avoid just restating the question. Avoid just restating the question. Focus on the appropriate historical thinking skills.Focus on the appropriate historical thinking skills.

Don’t be afraid of making a mistake!Don’t be afraid of making a mistake! Certainty is not as common in history as it is in math or the physical Certainty is not as common in history as it is in math or the physical

sciences. sciences. Disagreement over the interpretation of the historical evidence develops Disagreement over the interpretation of the historical evidence develops

because of the limitations of the evidence available and the differing because of the limitations of the evidence available and the differing perspectives of both participants and historians. perspectives of both participants and historians.

As a result, AP readers are looking not for the “single right answer" but As a result, AP readers are looking not for the “single right answer" but for a writer's ability to interpret the evidence and marshal historical for a writer's ability to interpret the evidence and marshal historical support for that interpretation.support for that interpretation.

The direction for the long-essay may give clear directions on The direction for the long-essay may give clear directions on the formation of the thesis, such as "support, modify, or the formation of the thesis, such as "support, modify, or refute" an interpretation.refute" an interpretation.

Weak Thesis ExamplesWeak Thesis Examples

Simple Thesis: Simple Thesis: ““Domestic and foreign affairs shaped American politics.” Domestic and foreign affairs shaped American politics.”

Complex-simple thesis: Complex-simple thesis: ““In some respects, foreign affairs shaped American politics In some respects, foreign affairs shaped American politics

more than domestic affairs during the 1790s.”more than domestic affairs during the 1790s.” Simple-split thesis: Simple-split thesis:

““In some respects, foreign affairs shaped American politics In some respects, foreign affairs shaped American politics more than domestic affairs during the 1790s. A number of more than domestic affairs during the 1790s. A number of issues from wars overseas to relations with other countries issues from wars overseas to relations with other countries caused this.”caused this.”

Use this checklist: Use this checklist: Does the thesis take a position or does it “fence-sit”?Does the thesis take a position or does it “fence-sit”? Does the thesis offer an interpretation of the question?Does the thesis offer an interpretation of the question? Does the thesis offer specific organizing or controlling ideas for an essay?Does the thesis offer specific organizing or controlling ideas for an essay?

Complex-split thesis: Complex-split thesis: Although some historians may Although some historians may argue that domestic issues shaped American argue that domestic issues shaped American

politics politics during the 1790sduring the 1790s, foreign affairs , foreign affairs contributed morecontributed more to shaping American to shaping American politics than domestic issues politics than domestic issues because because these issues seemed to dominate American these issues seemed to dominate American electoral debates in this time period. electoral debates in this time period. While the young nation struggled with While the young nation struggled with questions about powers in the new Constitution, ideological conflicts over the questions about powers in the new Constitution, ideological conflicts over the French Revolution, foreign policy divisions created by the Napoleonic Wars, and French Revolution, foreign policy divisions created by the Napoleonic Wars, and our relations with Great Britain did more to divide Americans and promote the our relations with Great Britain did more to divide Americans and promote the formation of two political parties formation of two political parties during the 1790sduring the 1790s..1.) Acknowledges the other side / prepares a counter-argument.1.) Acknowledges the other side / prepares a counter-argument.

2.) Sets the historical time and place 2.) Sets the historical time and place

3.) Takes a position by making a judgment or argument (“Evaluate”). 3.) Takes a position by making a judgment or argument (“Evaluate”).

4.) Uses a “because” clause to give a reason for the position and sets the 4.) Uses a “because” clause to give a reason for the position and sets the historical context. historical context.

5.) Explains the “because” portion with an analytical interpretation & 5.) Explains the “because” portion with an analytical interpretation & subtopics. This subtopics. This interpretation provided the organizing arguments that interpretation provided the organizing arguments that guided the development of the guided the development of the essay.essay.

A good thesis may A good thesis may acknowledge the opposing acknowledge the opposing

argumentargumentA good thesis allows the writer to show A good thesis allows the writer to show understanding of the complexity of the understanding of the complexity of the issue and knowledge of information on issue and knowledge of information on both sides of the issue. Most of the both sides of the issue. Most of the essay questions allow for an opinion on essay questions allow for an opinion on either side of the question. By either side of the question. By acknowledging another view in the acknowledging another view in the thesis, it becomes possible to add thesis, it becomes possible to add relevant information on that side of the relevant information on that side of the issue.issue.

Want a formula?Want a formula?

Although………, Although………,

however……………however……………

because…………………….because…………………….

““Thomas Jefferson is often thought of as Thomas Jefferson is often thought of as an idealist, but as president, he an idealist, but as president, he

demonstrated his conviction as a demonstrated his conviction as a pragmatist.” Support, modify, or refute pragmatist.” Support, modify, or refute

this statement.this statement. AlthoughAlthough Jefferson was idealistic in his insistence on Jefferson was idealistic in his insistence on

an embargo that cut off trade to Europe, he showed an embargo that cut off trade to Europe, he showed himself to be predominantly a pragmatist in the way himself to be predominantly a pragmatist in the way he handled the Louisiana Purchase, the issue of the he handled the Louisiana Purchase, the issue of the constitutionality of the National Bank, and Federalist constitutionality of the National Bank, and Federalist appointees. appointees.

Despite Despite his pragmatic decision to purchase his pragmatic decision to purchase Louisiana, Jefferson proved himself to be primarily an Louisiana, Jefferson proved himself to be primarily an idealist through his handling of the Embargo Act and idealist through his handling of the Embargo Act and the national debt. the national debt.

4. Write the introductory 4. Write the introductory paragraphparagraph

AP guidelines are reluctant to recommend a AP guidelines are reluctant to recommend a specific structure for the introductory paragraph specific structure for the introductory paragraph for a history essay, lest they limit a student's for a history essay, lest they limit a student's creativity. creativity.

However, many students suffer from poorly However, many students suffer from poorly organized essays with no thesis statements or an organized essays with no thesis statements or an argument so embedded in the essay that it might argument so embedded in the essay that it might take several readings to find it. take several readings to find it.

Therefore, you can probably improve your essay Therefore, you can probably improve your essay by using some organizing principles for writing an by using some organizing principles for writing an introductory paragraph.introductory paragraph.

Sample Organization for a Long Sample Organization for a Long EssayEssay

Effective Intro ParagraphEffective Intro Paragraph An effective introductory paragraph usually contains three An effective introductory paragraph usually contains three

elements: elements: 1.) establishes the setting time and place by providing 1.) establishes the setting time and place by providing

the background or historical context for the question or the background or historical context for the question or your thesis,your thesis,

2.) the thesis statement, and 2.) the thesis statement, and

3.) a “blueprint” or “controlling ideas” to the main 3.) a “blueprint” or “controlling ideas” to the main arguments of the essay to be developed in the body or arguments of the essay to be developed in the body or supporting paragraphs. supporting paragraphs.

Writing the supporting Writing the supporting paragraphs and conclusionparagraphs and conclusion

The number and length of the supporting The number and length of the supporting paragraphs forming the body of the essay should paragraphs forming the body of the essay should vary depending on the thesis (vary depending on the thesis (not necessarily 5 not necessarily 5 paragraphs!paragraphs!), the main points of your argument, ), the main points of your argument, and the amount of historical evidence. and the amount of historical evidence.

To receive the highest possible AP score, you To receive the highest possible AP score, you must explain how specific historical evidence is must explain how specific historical evidence is linked to your thesis. linked to your thesis.

Each essay will also have a targeted historical Each essay will also have a targeted historical thinking skill, which should shape one thinking skill, which should shape one argumentation and choice of evidence. argumentation and choice of evidence.

Historical Thinking Skills & the Long Historical Thinking Skills & the Long EssayEssay

Causation Causation Describes and analyzes causes and/or effects of a historical Describes and analyzes causes and/or effects of a historical

development, illustrated with specific examples.development, illustrated with specific examples.

Comparison Comparison Describes and analyzes reasons for similarities and/or Describes and analyzes reasons for similarities and/or

differences in historical developments with specific examples.differences in historical developments with specific examples.

Continuity and Change over Time Continuity and Change over Time Describes and analyzes historical continuity and change with Describes and analyzes historical continuity and change with

specific examples.specific examples.

Periodization Periodization Analyzes the extent to which the historical development Analyzes the extent to which the historical development

specified in the prompt (often a date) was of higher or lesser specified in the prompt (often a date) was of higher or lesser value than a different event, again with specific examples to value than a different event, again with specific examples to illustrate the analysis.illustrate the analysis.

Synthesis & the Long EssaySynthesis & the Long Essay Synthesis involves: Synthesis involves:

organizing relevant historical evidence in a coherent and persuasive argument. organizing relevant historical evidence in a coherent and persuasive argument. Explains the historical context of the question. Explains the historical context of the question.

The historical context of the French Revolution is essential to analyzing the foreign policy The historical context of the French Revolution is essential to analyzing the foreign policy debate in the United States electoral politics during the 1790s.debate in the United States electoral politics during the 1790s.

While length is no guarantee of a top grade, the longer essay While length is no guarantee of a top grade, the longer essay often receives a higher grade because of its depth of analysis often receives a higher grade because of its depth of analysis and factual support. and factual support. DO NOT just try to fill up a specific number of pages but, instead write an DO NOT just try to fill up a specific number of pages but, instead write an

insightful, persuasive and well-supported essay. insightful, persuasive and well-supported essay. DO NOT just list a few generalities or a "laundry list" of facts. DO NOT just list a few generalities or a "laundry list" of facts. DO NOT write in the narrative style by telling “stories,” but rather your goal should DO NOT write in the narrative style by telling “stories,” but rather your goal should

be to write analytically and support your argument with specific knowledge. be to write analytically and support your argument with specific knowledge. DO NOT use fillers and flowery language in an attempt to impress the reader. DO NOT use fillers and flowery language in an attempt to impress the reader.

Write a a concise, coherent essay in which every word has a purpose. Don’t waste Write a a concise, coherent essay in which every word has a purpose. Don’t waste time!time!

Tips for the Long EssayTips for the Long Essay Write essays in the third person, not 1Write essays in the third person, not 1stst person ( person ("I," "we"). "I," "we").

Use the active voice (e.g. “Edison created”) b/c it denotes cause and Use the active voice (e.g. “Edison created”) b/c it denotes cause and effect.effect.

Use specific words. Use specific words. Clearly identify persons, factors, and judgments. Avoid vague verbs such Clearly identify persons, factors, and judgments. Avoid vague verbs such

as "felt" and "says," and vague references, such as "they" and "others." as "felt" and "says," and vague references, such as "they" and "others." Avoid absolutes, such as "all" and "none." Rarely in history is the evidence Avoid absolutes, such as "all" and "none." Rarely in history is the evidence so absolutely conclusive that you can prove that there were no exceptions.so absolutely conclusive that you can prove that there were no exceptions.

Define or explain key terms. Define or explain key terms. If the question deals with terms (such as "liberal,“ "conservative," If the question deals with terms (such as "liberal,“ "conservative,"

"sectionalism," or "manifest destiny"), an essential part of your analysis "sectionalism," or "manifest destiny"), an essential part of your analysis should include an explanation of these terms.should include an explanation of these terms.

Communicate awareness of the complexity of history. Communicate awareness of the complexity of history. Distinguishing between primary and secondary causes and effects, Distinguishing between primary and secondary causes and effects,

between the significant and the less important. Use verbs that between the significant and the less important. Use verbs that communicate judgment and analysis (e.g., "reveal," "exemplify," communicate judgment and analysis (e.g., "reveal," "exemplify," "demonstrate," "imply,“ "symbolize")."demonstrate," "imply,“ "symbolize").

Tips for the Long EssayTips for the Long Essay Anticipate counterarguments. Anticipate counterarguments.

Consider arguments that are against your thesis, not to prove them, but to show that Consider arguments that are against your thesis, not to prove them, but to show that you are aware of opposing points of view. The strongest essays confront conflicting you are aware of opposing points of view. The strongest essays confront conflicting evidence.evidence.

Remain objective. Remain objective. Avoid rhetoric, especially on social issues. The AP test is not the place to argue that a Avoid rhetoric, especially on social issues. The AP test is not the place to argue that a

group was racists or that some were the "good guys" while others were the "bad guys." group was racists or that some were the "good guys" while others were the "bad guys." Do not use slang terms!Do not use slang terms!

Communicate the organization and logical development of your Communicate the organization and logical development of your argument. argument. Each paragraph should develop a main point that is clearly stated in the topic sentence. Each paragraph should develop a main point that is clearly stated in the topic sentence.

Provide a few words or a phrase of transition to connect one paragraph to another.Provide a few words or a phrase of transition to connect one paragraph to another.

Focus on the thesis in the conclusion. Focus on the thesis in the conclusion. Restate the thesis in a fresh and interesting manner or explain its significance. The Restate the thesis in a fresh and interesting manner or explain its significance. The

conclusion should not try to summarize all the data or introduce new evidence. No conclusion should not try to summarize all the data or introduce new evidence. No conclusion is better than a meaningless effort. If you are running out of time, but have conclusion is better than a meaningless effort. If you are running out of time, but have written a well-organized essay with a clear thesis that is restated in the supporting written a well-organized essay with a clear thesis that is restated in the supporting paragraphs, you should receive little or no penalty for not having a conclusion.paragraphs, you should receive little or no penalty for not having a conclusion.

6. Evaluate your Essay6. Evaluate your Essay

More essay writing does not More essay writing does not necessarily produce better essays. necessarily produce better essays. Breaking down the process into Breaking down the process into

manageable and sequential steps is one manageable and sequential steps is one key for improvement. key for improvement.

Peer evaluation and self-evaluation both Peer evaluation and self-evaluation both help students to internalize the help students to internalize the elements of an effective essay and learn elements of an effective essay and learn ways to improve. ways to improve.

Checklist Checklist 1. Introductory Paragraph 1. Introductory Paragraph

Underline the thesis and circle the structural elements identified in the introduction. Underline the thesis and circle the structural elements identified in the introduction. How effectively does the introductory paragraph prepare the reader for the balance of How effectively does the introductory paragraph prepare the reader for the balance of the essay? How could the introductory paragraph be improved?the essay? How could the introductory paragraph be improved?

2. Thesis 2. Thesis How well does thesis deal with all parts of the question? Does the thesis acknowledge How well does thesis deal with all parts of the question? Does the thesis acknowledge

the complexity of the question? How could the thesis be improved?the complexity of the question? How could the thesis be improved?

3. Analysis 3. Analysis Does the body of the essay provide analysis of the question or does it primarily Does the body of the essay provide analysis of the question or does it primarily

describe? Does it acknowledge opposing points of view on the questions? How could describe? Does it acknowledge opposing points of view on the questions? How could the analysis be improved?the analysis be improved?

4. Evidence 4. Evidence Is the thesis supported with substantial, relevant information? Is the evidence clearly Is the thesis supported with substantial, relevant information? Is the evidence clearly

linked to the thesis? What significant additional information could have been used for linked to the thesis? What significant additional information could have been used for support? support?

5. 5. Errors Errors What minor or major errors in fact or analysis does the essay include?What minor or major errors in fact or analysis does the essay include?

6. Presentation 6. Presentation How well-organized and persuasive is the essay? Do the paragraph composition, How well-organized and persuasive is the essay? Do the paragraph composition,

sentence structure, word choice, and spelling detract from the essays? Do any sentence structure, word choice, and spelling detract from the essays? Do any specific areas need improvement?specific areas need improvement?

Practice Scoring GuidePractice Scoring Guide