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Chapter Thirteen

Divorce

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Three Eras of Divorce

Changes over the past two centuries

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The Era of Restricted Divorce Western nations until mid-1800s

Marriage seen as institutional Divorce rare - only granted on

grounds of adultery or desertion and usually only granted to men

Annulments were the only alternative Ruled that marriage never properly

formed

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The Era of Divorce Tolerance Mid-1800s until 1970

Grounds for divorce widened, more accessible to women

Habitual drunkenness, mental cruelty added to grounds for divorce

Marriage went from economic partnership to emotional partnership Based on love and companionship Failure to achieve this seen as valid reason

for divorce

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The Era of Divorce Tolerance Divorce rate rose substantially

from late 1800s to early 1900s 8% in 1880s 12% in early 1900s 18% in 1920s

Steady rise broken by spikes after World Wars I and II and a dip during the Great Depression

To obtain divorce, still had to prove spouse had done wrong

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The Era of Unrestricted Divorce 1970s to present Divorce usually granted without

restrictions to any married person California first state to endorse “no

fault” divorce laws - divorce for marriage breakdown

Shift from companionship marriage to independent marriage Person should not be forced to continue in

marriage s/he finds unacceptable

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The Society-wide Rise Surge appeared after no-fault

laws appeared “Backlog effect” - couples in troubled

marriages quick to take advantage of new rules

Appears more a consequence of trend than the cause of it

Cultural Change Commitment vs. personal well-being

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The Society-wide Rise Women’s employment

Income effect – lower divorce rate Economic opportunity effect- increase

divorce rate Appears to be more powerful than income

effect

Men’s employment Opportunities down Society still expects husband to earn a

steady income

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Individual Risk Factors

Low Income and Unemployment Divorce more likely if

Man unemployed Low-income family

Age at Marriage Teen marriages at high risk for divorce Higher for those who marry for first

time over age 35

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Individual Risk Factors Race and ethnicity

African Americans have higher rates of marital separation than most racial-ethnic groups

One-half marriages of black women end in 10 years Separation less likely to end in divorce

Personal and family background Cohabitation prior to marriage has higher divorce rates Children of parents who divorce are more likely to divorce Children of parent who died when they were young are

not more likely to become divorced Indicates effect of divorce on sustaining marriage

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Individual Risk Factors People who are similar are less likely

to divorce - more compatible in interests and values

Catholics married to Catholics and Protestants married to Protestants less likely to divorce than Catholics married to Protestants

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The Emotional Divorce Initiator = the person in a marriage who

first becomes dissatisfied and begins the process of ending the marriage

Early Warning Signs Initiator begins to express discontent

May try to change the other person’s behavior or the relationship

If unsuccessful, may invest more energy and emotion outside of marriage

At some point, dissatisfaction is expressed and confrontation occurs

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The Emotional Divorce Separation

Initiator decides marriage should not continue

Announces breakup to the couple’s world

Attachment which has occurred during marriage is expressed in separation distress

Eventually most people do adjust – 2 to 4 years to recover

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The Legal Divorce

Property and Assets No children – just a split or agreement

to divide property and assets Intangible assets

Professional license, educational credential Alimony = maintenance payments from

ex-husband to ex-wife Few couples now agree to it, and few

judges order it

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The Legal Divorce Child Custody - who will have

responsibility and where will they live? Legal custody = right to make important

decisions about the children and the obligation to have legal responsibility for them

Physical custody = right of a divorced spouse to have one’s children live with him/her

Joint legal custody = both parents retain responsibility and decision-making about child

Joint physical custody = arrangement where child spends substantial time in both parents’ households

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The Coparental Divorce In reality, most children still remain in

care of their mothers Creates an imbalance with women having

more responsibilities Level of contact between fathers and

children is low Coparenting = parents coordinate

activities and cooperate in raising children

Parallel parenting = gravitate toward more detached style, both parents operating separately

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The Economic Divorce

Many fathers fade from children’s lives because they cannot or will not contribute to their support

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The Economic Divorce

Many mothers are hit with a financial double whammy Lose husband’s income Less than half receive any economic

support Average mother’s standard of living

goes down 30% in the first year

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The Economic Divorce Breadwinner-Homemaker Couples

Inequality worst for older women in this family style

Income can be cut in half during the first year

Single-father families Number growing

Almost tripled between 1980 and 1998 !8% had incomes below poverty line 21% had incomes less than twice the poverty line 4% of all children lived in single-father families in

1998

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The Effects of Divorce on Children Children do not choose parents’

divorce In many cases, their well-being is

diminished by the divorce

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The Crisis Period Period during the first year or two after

parents separate when both custodial parent and children experience difficulties dealing with the situation One consequence is diminished parenting

Distracted, distressed parents have difficulty providing emotional support and moderate, consistent discipline on a daily basis

Parents may be seen as emotionally distant and prone to ignore child misbehavior

Parents and children drawn into “coercive cycles” Economics also cause distress

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The Crisis Period Loss of a Parent

When one parent leaves, it makes other parent’s job harder

Parental Conflict When parents fight, children tend to

become fearful and distressed Ameliorated if parents coparent or

parallel parent Conflict may begin before separation

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The Crisis Period

Multiple Transitions Departure of parent from home Loss of house and neighborhood and

possibly school Other adults moving in and out of

household

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After the Crisis Period The majority of children resume

normal development Young adolescents may display

serious behavior problems 5 years after divorce: 25-30% from

divorced homes, as opposed to 10% from intact families

Girls displayed as many problems as boys

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Long-Term Adjustment The Sleeper Effect

Wallerstein reported a widespread, lasting difficulty in personal relationships

British study Mental health of divorced children as adults

was somewhat worse than that of children from intact families

Overall, the majority did not show serious mental health problems

Problems more likely to occur in troubled divorced families

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Long-Term Adjustment

Education and employment Children from divorced or single-parent

families more likely to drop out of school

Marital Happiness People whose parents divorced were

just as happy with their marriages, on average, as people whose parents did not divorce

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Long-Term Adjustment

In Sum Almost all children experience intense

emotional upset after parents separate

Most resume normal development without serious problems within about 2 years

A minority experience some long-term problems which may persist into adulthood