Englishtranslationofthebookletdistributedatthecelebrationoflifeceremony

forMasaruKawasaki,onFebruary24,2019

(TranslatedbyTomomiKawasaki,granddaughterofMasaru)

2

Wearesogratefultoallofyouforyourpresenceheretodayandsohappytobeableto

holdthisflowerceremony.Thefactthatourfather,MasaruKawasaki,wasabletocomplete94

fulfilling years, living a joyful life full of music, leaving behind many compositions, and

maintaininghiscuriosityandyouthfulspirituntilhislastdays–allofthisisduetoyourwarm

support,andforthiswethankyoufromthebottomofourhearts. Inhisyoungerdays,ourfatherwasyourclassicsciencetype,evenhavingaspirationsof

becominganengineer.Evenasheneared90,hewasacapablecomputeruser,burningCDsand

printinglabels,bindingandshippinghisscoreshimself.However,itseemshealsospecializedin

asking all of you whatever he did not understand himself and making impossible requests,

troubling many of you with lengthy phone calls, and we sincerely apologize for the

inconveniencehecausedyou.Ourfathermayhavebeenaconartistofsorts–inthebestsenseof

theword–asweimaginesomeofhispupilsfeltthattheycouldnotdeclineourfather’srequests

eveniftheywantedto.Toallofyouwhodealtwithhim,weholdthedeepestgratitude.

Always eager to try out new things, our father was quick to purchase the earliest

recordingdevicethatSONYofferedforsaletothegeneralpublicduringtheearlysixties,andhe

tookdelightinputtingitrighttouseforhiswork.Wheneverhewouldreceiveanyawardforhis

composition,hewouldspendtheprizemoneyonanimportedsectional,orpurchaseaRenaultas

hisfirstcar.Hewasacool,stylishdadthatwecouldboastabout.Oftheworkhedidatthetime,

thejobthatleftthestrongestimpressiononuswasforaneducationalprogramonanNHKradio

broadcast.Itwasasocialstudiesprogram,probablyabout15to20minuteslong,andeachweek

ourfatherwasresponsiblefortheaccompanyingsoundtrack.Atthebeginningofeveryweek,a

producer from NHK would call and, as if placing an order of noodles for lunch, request “15

secondsforatragicscene,”“a3-secondbridge,”“5secondsforascenechange,”andsoforth.Our

fatherwouldthereafterpreparesuchmusicintwotothreedaysanddrivehisowncartodeliver

thescorestothecopyistinFujisawa,whowouldhurriedlycreatetheorchestraparts.Oncethe

partswereready, thevoiceactorsand liveorchestragatheredintheNHKstudiotorecordthe

program.He continued this time-pressuredwork formanyyears.Although thewholeprocess

couldbecompletednowadaysbyanymiddleschoolerwithasmartphone,atthetimesuchwork

wastrulyalarge-scaleproduction.

Having grown up in Hiroshima with a love of the ocean, our father built a home in

Chigasakiin1956.BackthenChigasakiwasthesortofruralareathatpeoplemadefunof,with

3

nothing to speak of but peach forests, mosquitoes and flies. Nevertheless, our father enjoyed

takingsomeofhispupilsoutforadayofswimmingatthebeach,cyclingtoEnoshimaIslandwith

thetwoofusonthebackofhisbicycle,keepingfishthathecaughtinEnoshimainthefishtankat

home for a while, and casting nets for smelt in the Hanamizu River with his friends. He

thoroughlyenjoyedthenatureintheShonanarea.

We have vividmemories of December 8th 1966, the day our father left for this studies

abroad in America. His flight departed at 10 a.m., so a car arrived at the house early in the

morningand,withlargesuitcasesandthefourofusintow,headedforHanedaAirport.Alarge

grouphadgatheredattheairporttoseeourfatheroff,includingstudentsofhisholdingbanners,

andour fatherwasmovedtotearsasheboardedtheplane.Ata timewhentheexchangerate

was 360 yen to the dollar, he certainly had no surplus of money, but the encouragement he

received from the many who surrounded him with their support, this was our father’s life

savingsandhisgreatesttreasure.

SurvivingthewarandtheatomicbombinHiroshimaundeniablyhadthegreatestimpact

onourfather’slife.Whatfollowsbelowisaneditedversionofamanuscriptthatourfatherwrote

himselfabouthissurvivalstoryandsubmittedtothealumnimagazineofTokyoUniversityofthe

Artsin2011(whenhewas87yearsold).Althoughitissomewhatlong,ourmotherTaekoand

wehistwosonswishtoleaveyouwiththismanuscripttoday,inthehopesthatwemayconvey

toyouourfather’ssentimentsinhisownwords.

Wehaveappendedalistofourfather’scompositionsattheendofthisbooklet.It isthe

desireofourwholefamilythathiscompositionsmaycontinuetoresoundinyourheartsforever.

Wesincerelythankyouforyourpresencetoday,this24thdayofFebruary,2019,atthis

flowerceremonyinhonorofourfather,MasaruKawasaki.

MasashiKawasaki(elderson)

MasayaKawasaki(youngerson)

4

ACallforPeace

byMasaruKawasaki

ImatriculatedatTokyoAcademyofMusicasa flutemajor inAprilof1943. Itwasthen

thatIbeganmystudiesincompositionwithProfessorSaburoMoroi,asIhopedtobecomenot

onlyaperformerbutalsoacomposer.Evenafterthewar, Icontinuedtoreceiveinstructionin

harmony,counterpoint,andmusicalanalysisatthehomeofProfessorMoroiinNakano,Tokyo.

Theremystudiesextendedfrombaroquetocontemporarymusic,totwelve-toneserialism,and

totheanalysisofworkssuchasthoseofSchoenberg,Berg,andWebern.

Ifirstgainedrecognitionasacomposerin1956,whenIreceivedthecompositionaward

atthe11thArtsFestivaloftheJapaneseMinistryofEducation,Science,SportsandCulture.Iwas

also fortunate to be granted a UNESCO fellowship for creative artists and was able to study

compositionatTheJulliardSchoolunderthetutelageofProfessorPersichetti.

Afterthewar,itwas30yearsbeforeIcouldbringmyselftocomposemusiconthesubject

oftheatomicbombing,andthiswasfortworeasons.First,Ididnotwanttopromotemyselfasa

survivorof the atomicbombing. I disliked the idea thatmymusicmight gain fameandmedia

attention simply for being the work of an Atomic Bomb Survivor. Second, for many years,

survivorsof theatomicbombings faceddiscriminationandprejudice.Survivorswouldbecome

the subjects of unsolicited social interventions or political designs, and it was a generally

unpleasanttimetobeasurvivoroftheatomicbombings.Forinstance,simplybeingasurvivor

wascauseforhesitationwhenitcametoemploymentandmarriageprospects,assurvivorswere

shunned by society in many cases. Although I myself was fortunate enough to continue my

studies, resumemywork as a composer, and bemarried, itwas a timewhen survivors faced

muchprejudice.

Evenso,finallyin1975,thirtyyearsaftertheendofWorldWarII,IdedicatedmyPrayer

MusicNo.1“Dirge”tothecityofHiroshima,anditisnowperformedeveryyearattheAugust6th

PeaceMemorialCeremonyofthecityofHiroshima.Intheceremony,itisperformedeveryyear

duringtheflowerofferingandiscustomarilytimedtoendat8:15a.m.,theexactmomentofthe

detonation of the atomic bomb. Truth be told, it was many years prior that Mr. Masuhiro, a

residentofHiroshimaandmyseniorattheacademyofmusic,hadsuggestedIcomposeapiece

5

onthesubjectof theatomicbomb,but it tookmeover tenyears toovercomethereluctance I

describedearlierandtopresentthiscompositiontothecityofHiroshima.WhenIpresentedthis

PrayerMusicNo.1“Dirge”,Iincludedthefollowingmessagewithmyscore:

Ihumblydedicatethispiecetoallthosesoulsforfeitedtotheatomicbomb.Althoughthirty

yearshavepassedsincethatday,Icanneverforgettheexperienceofsurvivingthatatomic

bomb.Havingmanaged to surviveonlyby the slimmestdifference indestiny, Imyself can

only pray for the peaceful repose of the souls of all victims of that atrocity, to whom I

dedicatethisprayermusic.

Thepieceisnotaportrayalofthatdaybutratheritseekstoexpressmyindignationand

offersomecomfortforallthosevictimswhoseliveswerelost.“IfeelsorrowfulwheneverIplay

thispiece.”Thesearethewordsofahighschoolstudentwhoperformedthisdark,heavypiece.

Thepiecereceivedmuchmediacoverage,althoughthiswastheexactoppositeofmyintention.

However,whenthathappened,Iresolvedtomakeitmylife’sworktocomposeaseriesofprayer

music,andtodateIhavecomposedsixpieces.Nos.1,2,and3aresymphonicbandcompositions.

PrayerMusicNo.5“MorningPrayer”premieredin2007.Lastyear,whenIwas86,PrayerMusic

No.6“EveningPrayer”sawitspremiereinHiroshima.IamcurrentlystrugglingtocreateNo.7.

My grandmother was the younger sister of Kenshi Nagai. Mr. Nagai, my great-uncle,

receiveda government-sponsored scholarship to studyabroad inFranceand,havingassumed

theofficeof armybandmasteruponhis return to Japan,playedanexceedingly important role

during the time of the founding of the military band. Although my father, Yutaka Kawasaki,

enlistedatToyamaMilitaryAcademywherehisuncleKenshiNagaiwasbandmaster,heaspired

to become a vocalist, so after hismilitary discharge, he joined the Asakusa Opera as a tenor.

TherehecollaboratedwithartistssuchasRikizoTayaandKen’ichiEnomoto.Myfatherwasan

extraordinarily well-built and handsome man whom my father-in-law likened to the famous

actorToshiroMifune.Hisvoicewassopowerful thatwhenhewouldvocalizeorsingathome,

ourneighborsfoundhimtobesuchanannoyancethatwewereforcedtorelocatemanytimes.

ThiswasthereasonItransferredtosixdifferentelementaryschools.

MyfatherYutakaKawasakiwasadramatictenorwhoperformedPinkertonfromMadame

ButterflyandotherselectionsfromoperassuchasToscaandPagliacci.Hehadbigdreamsand

traveledtoMilan,Italytostudyvocalmusic,anduponhisreturn,hejoinedwithTamakiMiurato

performtheroleofPinkertoninMadameButterfly,andtherecordsheproducedwhenhewasa

6

singerundercontractwithColumbiaRecordsstillremaininthearchive.Heonceevensangthe

anthemof the ItalianNational FascistPartyon a Japanesenational radiobroadcast.Whilemy

father was away in Italy for two to three years, my mother and I awaited his return in his

hometownofHiroshima.

Foratime,myfatherstayedatthehomeofhisuncleKenshiNagai.Perhapsinfluencedby

havinglivedintheatmosphereofamilitaryhousehold,myfatherdislikedtheworldofsongas

publicentertainment.Inhislastyears,hetrainedmanypupilsandhislife’sjourneyendedatthe

distinguishedageof96years.

I was born in Tokyo in April of 1924. Although I entered Fuji Elementary School in

Asakusa,my fathersoon left forhisstudies invocalmusic in Italy, somymotherand Imoved

backtomygrandparents’home inHiroshima. Itwasat that timethat I receivedpiano lessons

frommymother.Whenmyfatherreturned,ourfamilyrelocatedtoTokyo,andIledahappylife

duringJapan’speacefulearlydaysoftheShowaera.Beforelong,however,withtheManchurian

IncidentandtheMarcoPoloBridgeIncident,Japanrapidlybecameanationatwar,andclassical

musiciansfounditdifficulttocontinuetheirwork.Myfatherfoundemploymentasavocalcoach

in the welfare department of the government-sponsored South Manchurian Railway, so my

parentsmovedtoMukden(nowShenyang)inManchuria.

I remained in Hiroshima at the home of my relatives and attended Hiroshima Second

MiddleSchool,butmyhopesweretobeadmittedtoahighschoolinLüshun,acitythatyoung

men everywhere dreamed of. When I learned that middle schoolers who were Manchurian

residents could earn preferential admission to that high school, I joined my parents and

transferred to Mukden Second Middle School when I was in my fifth year of middle school.

(Underthetraditionalsysteminplaceatthetime,middleschoolwasfiveyearslong.)Ienjoyeda

calmandexpansivelifeinMukden.Thebeautifulsunsetstheremadeanimpressionthatremains

withmeeventothisday.Ilovedhorsebackridingonhorsesformerlyusedbythecavalry,which

Irodepast thecrowdedstreets to thepublicgardensdedicatedto themauseloumofEmperor

QinShiHuang.Untilthen,Ihadbeenplanningtoapplytoascienceuniversityaftergraduation,

butsomethingaboutthestatelycalmoftheNorthernManchuriansights,thelikesofwhichcould

notbefoundontheJapanesemainland,raisedwithinmysoulthatmusicthathadbeenhiddenin

myheart.Ientreatedmyfather,“Iwanttobecomeacomposer.”

7

My father responded, “Frommy experience inmusic,my advice is this: If youwant to

becomeacomposer,youmustfirstknowthesubtletiesofperformance.However,itistoolatefor

youtobecomeapianist,andthequalityofyourvoiceisnotsuitableforavocalist.So,itwouldbe

bestforyoutomajorinawindinstrument,whichyoumaystillbeabletolearn.”Hebroughtme

severalinstrumentsincludingtheflute,theoboe,andtheclarinet,butitwasthefluteonwhichI

was able to produce a sound promptly and easily and which thereafter became my beloved

companion.

In March of 1942, having graduated from Mukden Second Middle School, I moved to

TokyoandapprenticedmyselftoProfessorShozoSuzuki.IauditionedfortheTokyoAcademyof

Music,wasofcourserejected,butthefollowingyear, Iauditionedagainandwasaccepted.For

thepracticalexam,IplayedMozart’sFluteConcertoNo.2.Idon’trememberhowIplayedit,butI

thinkitwasprobablyamess.However, Ihadall theChorübungenmemorizedandIpassedthe

pianoandeartrainingexamswithnotrouble.Atthefinalinterview,though,PrincipalNorisugi

queriedme,“Youngman,areyouJapanese?”towhichIrepliedconfidently,“Yes!Iamproudto

callmyself Japanese.” He scoldedme, “Thenwhat are thesemarks you’ve earned in Japanese

class!?” but thankfully granted me admission. Principal Norisugi was a graduate of the

DepartmentofArtsandPhilosophyofTheUniversityofTokyo.

At the time,TokyoAcademyofMusic requiredoneyearofprovisional enrollment. Full

admissionwasgrantedonlyifbothone’sgradesandbehaviorwereacceptable.Therefore,Iwas

pleasedthatIwasabletobecomeasophomoreattheAcademyofMusicinAprilof1944.Right

afterwehadgainedfulladmission,anoticewasplacedontheschoolbulletinboardthatread:

“SeekingstudentsinterestedinenlistingasmilitarystudentstojointhemilitarybandofToyama

MilitarySchool.Advantageswillbegranted.”ThenoticewassignedbyPrincipalNorisugi.Ilater

understood that those advantages were that admission to Toyama could exempt one from

enlistmentinageneralmilitarydepartment.

Along with my peers in the composition department, Yasushi Akutagawa, Hajime

Okumura, Takanobu Saito and Ikuma Dan, I hoped to enlist at Toyama Military Academy.

However,becausetheacademyconsistedofvolunteersoldiers,aphysicalwasrequired,whichI

unfortunately failed solely due to severe myopia. I had no choice but to undergo a draft

inspection, but because of my myopia, I was enrolled in the Hiroshima Second Platoon in

Septemberof1944,asasoldiernotofthehighestclassbutofthesecondrank.

8

Onedaynotlongbeforethedayofmyenlistment,IwenttogivemygreetingstoProfessor

Norisugi.Onmywayhome,asIwalkedthroughUenoParktowardthestation,Iheardtheblare

of warning sirens. Students had been instructed to interpret them as a signal to rush to the

defenseoftheschool,soIhurriedback.“Oh,perfecttiming!”saidPrincipalNorisugi,whodidme

the great favor of introducing me to army commander Hakaru Gondo. As it turned out, this

meetingwouldimpactmyfateduringthewarinimmeasurableways,asCommanderGondowas

theretorequestamusicstudentforthearmynavaldivision.

Shortly after this encounter, I joined the military corps of Hiroshima. On the pre-

enlistmentsurveyregardingspecialskills,IreportedmusicandhorsebackridingbecauseIhad

experiencehorsebackridingasamiddleschoolstudentandbecauseIattendedmusicschool. I

secretlyhopedmyearformusicwouldbeacknowledgedwithanassignmentasacorrespondent.

Instead,myfamiliaritywithhorsesearnedmeapositionbehindthereinsasaluggagehandler.

Nowafter enlisting, I enduredexceedinglybrutal treatment in thebarracks, beaten left

andrightfornoapparentreason.“Takeoffyourglasses,spreadyourlegs,clenchyourteeth!”A

fistof ironwouldmaterializethroughmyhazeandbattermeoverandoveragain.Forabouta

week,Iwasterrified.Afterthat,IwasnolongerafraidevenifIwasbeatenagain,buttheswelling

ofmyfacewouldnotsubside.Morever,itwasthementalbullyingthatwastrulyintolerable,the

detailsofwhichIcannotbringmyselftowrite.(Wasthissortofbullyingthathadnothingtodo

withmartial lawormilitaryregulationaportentofthecollapseofthearmytowardtheendof

thewar?Iwondernow.)

Onedayaboutamonthaftermyenlistment,Iwasboardedontoatrainheadedwestfrom

HiroshimaStationwithoutawordastoourdestination.Perhapstokeepthetransportofsoldiers

asecret,theshuttersweredrawnoverthewindows,soIcouldnotseetheviewoutside,butwe

arrivedatShimonoseki,YamaguchiPrefecture.Fromthere,wecontinuedonviacarriershipto

Pusan,boardedanothertraintoSeoul,headedeast,andfinallyarrivedatHunchunontheright

edgeof theKoreanPeninsula, bordering the SovietUnion. I cared for thehorses andendured

grueling training as a member of the vast military corps of Hunchun, when suddenly I was

summoned to headquarters and ordered to transfer to the army naval division. Sent off with

mixedfeelingsfromthesoldiersinmycohort,Iretracedmystepsalongthesamerailways,but

this timealone,andreturned tomybelovedHiroshima.Although thearmynavaldivisionwas

9

headquarteredinHiroshima,ItransferredimmediatelytotheplatooncenteredatKoyoMiddle

School,whichthearmyhadrequisitionedinNishinomiyainHyogoPrefecture.

Because the naval division to which I belonged was a clandestine unit, soldiers were

prohibited fromgoingout. Exercisemeant sprinting through the suburbs in the companyof a

surveillance officer. As I caught glimpses ofwomen in their baggymonpe trousers, I came to

know the sad destiny of a man in my position. Later I learned that the piano department

professor,Mr.MotonariIguchi,alsobelongedtothisdivisionasacivilianinmilitaryemploy,but

Inevermethim.

On August 7th 1942, when the Japanese army captured Guadalcanal of the Solomon

Islands, they found a radar systemmisplaced by the American armed forces. Seizing this and

carefullyinvestigatingitsconstruction,Toshibacreateditsownradar,madeinJapan.(Nowadays

radar is not unusual, but at the time, Americawas the pioneer in the development of radar.)

[Editor’snote:Theauthor’suseofradarhereandfollowingpossiblyreferstosonar.]Theradar

developedbyJapanwascalledTypeSuandthemechanismitusedwastoemitunderwatersound

wavesandthencatchthewavesreflectedbackbyanobject,displayingtheelapsedtimeandthe

directionofthereflectedwavesinacathode-raytube.Byplacingareceiveragainstone’sear,one

coulddifferentiatebysoundwhetherthewaveswerereflectedbackbyacrag,afishingvessel,or

anenemysubmarine.Theoutstandinghearingofmusicstudentswasfoundtobeidealforthis

role,soIwasrecruitedaspartofthepersonnelresponsiblefortheacousticeducationofyoung

soldiers,andreceivedtrainingasacommandingofficer.

By1944,JapanhadlostbattleshipsofallsizestoAmericansubmarines,specifically1,009

vessels including transport ships, and so urgently needed to develop its radar system. As it

happened,theradarwasnotmanufacturedintime,sodrillscouldonlybeconductedontheopen

seastwoorthreetimes.Instead,oursquadpracticedhearingthecommand“Engagetheswitch!”

andreplying“Yes,sir!”while flippingamodelswitchattachedtoapieceofplywood.Thinking

backonitnow,itwasbothcomicalandpitiful.

Now as I aimed to become a commanding officer of acoustic training, Imemorized the

Imperial Military Code and studied things having nothing to do with music, such as the

constructionoftheradarsystemandhowtooperateeachapparatus.Evenafter lightsoutat9

p.m.wecadetscontinuedstudyingintheofficer’sofficeandretiredonlyatmidnight,butbefore

daybreakaround3to4a.m.,wewouldbeawakenedbyanemergencyrollcall.Weallstoodin

10

formationandshoutedinorder“One!Two!Three!”asrollwascalled,andthosewhoresponded

sleepilywerequicklypunishedwithakickandanironfist!

Whetherduetothecontinuedintensetraining,aroutinephysicalshowedadrasticdrop

inmybloodsedimentationrateandIwasdiagnosedwithaleftpulmonaryinfiltration.Indespair

andatmywits’ end, Iwas too stunnedeven to cry as a seniorofficer accompaniedme to the

army hospital at the foot of Himeji Castle, also known as “Magnificent White Heron Castle”,

whereIwashospitalized.(Evennow,whenIseethatcastlethroughatraincarwindow,itbrings

metotearstothinkofthosetimeslongago.)AfterIwashospitalized,myhealthimprovedtoa

degreeanditwasdeterminedthatIshouldcontinuemyrecuperationatthehotspringsandinn

inKinosaki,acityunderarmyoccupationonthecoastoftheSeaofJapan.Overthecourseofmy

two-month convalescence there, I pored over and was completely absorbed in reading

FunctionalHarmonybyProfessorSaburoMoroi, thesolepossessionIwasallowedandwhichI

carriedwithmethroughallthetravelsofmycorps.(“UntilIdieinthiswar,Istudytogivemylife

meaning.”Wasthisnotthecrynotjustofmyselfbutofallsoldiers-in-training?)Whenmyfever

brokeandmyhealthimproved,Iwasgrantedamonthlongmedicalfurloughandreturnedhome

torecuperateatthehouseofmyauntinHiroshima.(Iwasnotpermittedtoreturntomyparents’

residenceinMukden.)

On that fatefulday,August6th1945, I roseearlyandheaded towardHiroshimastation,

intending to meet my cousin Yoshiaki Minato, a student at the naval academy in Etajima. I

thoughtthiswasmylastchancetoseehim.However,althoughitisunthinkablenow,Iarrivedat

the station and could not procure a ticket due to sales restrictions, and after considerable

persistence, I gave up and headed home on a city streetcar. The tram I rode that day passed

throughgroundzero,butitwasaboutthirtyminutespriortothattragedy.Afterarrivinghome,I

wastellingmyaunttheaforementionedsequenceofevents,when–bang!–asomehowlightyet

sharpexplosionreverberatedsimultaneouslywithablindingflashthatlitupthewholecity.At

thatmoment,theatomicbombhadburst580metersabovethestreetsofHiroshimaandinan

instant annihilated the city ofHiroshimawithin a 2 kilometer radius. The housewhere Iwas

bombedwas1.5kilometersfromgroundzero,inthefirstwardofthetownofNishikan’non.The

housecollapsedinstantly,thebrokenlumbercrushingmyself,myaunt,andmythreecousins.I

lostconsciousnessandremainedburied,whoknowswhetherforfiveminutesorfortenminutes,

but when I came to, I clawed through the rubble and instinctively screamed, “Help me!

11

Somebodyhelp!”However I regainedmywitsand tookmatters intomyownhands, removing

myshirtandwrappingitaroundmynecktostopthebleedingfromthelacerationundermyleft

ear.Before longmyauntandcousinsalsoemerged,butduetomyprofusebleeding,myvision

wenthazyandIcollapsedonthespot.Yetfortunately,astrongmanwhohappenedtobenearby

putmeonhisbackandcarriedmetotheclosestriverbank.Itwaslaternotedthatthismanwas

ofKoreandescent.

Soonmyauntandcousins,whohadescapedinjury,gatheredscrapwoodfromtherubble

andbuiltasemblanceofacrampedhutforusandplacedmeinside,allowingmetoescapethe

ensuingdownpourofblackrainthatcarriedthenuclearfallout.Atthetime,strangersraninto

ourhuttoavoidtheblackrain,saying“Iamso-and-sofromsuch-and-suchward.Pleasenotify

myfamilyastomywhereabouts!”Clearly,survivorsdidnotyetcomprehendtheghastlinessof

theatomicbomb.Beforelong,thecitybecameengulfedinragingflamesandtransformedintoa

cityofdeath.

ThetownofHiroshimastandsatthedeltawheretheOtaRiverdivergesintosevenrivers.

TakingtheonebridgethathadremainedintactovertheFukushimaRiverinthecity’swestside,

my aunt raced to her older sister’s – in otherwords,my other aunt’s – home and begged for

assistance,“SomebodyhelpMasaru!”Atonce,thisauntdraggedoveralargetwo-wheeledwagon

thatwasnearbyandcarriedmeinittothevicinityofKoiStationonthewestsideofHiroshima

City.Duringthatride,wheneverIcameclosetolosingconsciousness,myauntapparentlygave

meagoodpinchanywhereandeverywhereandshouted inmyear repeatedly, “Comeon,pull

yourselftogether!”

Even in those circumstances, I remembered what I had been taught during military

training:“Whenyousustainaseriousinjury,donotdrinkwater.”EventhoughIwasunbearably

thirstyduringthattransportation,Irestrainedmyselfanddidnotdrinkanywater.Whenoneis

bleedingprofusely,drinkingwatercauses theblood to thinand to flowmoreandmore freely,

makingonethirstevenmore.MymouthwassodryIcouldnotevenspeak.Yetbecausemyaunt

pulledmeinthelargetwo-wheeledwagonwithallhermight, Isomehowmadeitsafelytothe

plaza nearKoi Station. There, a buswas on standbywaiting to take on thewounded. Injured

personswhocouldwalkboardedthebusoneafteranother,butIwasignored,beingunableto

walk.Rescuethosewhohadpotentialtobesavedandignorethosewhowereunlikelytosurvive;

thiswastheinviolableruleintimesofchaos.Myauntwhohadcarriedmeallthiswayshouted

12

fervently,“Thismanisasoldier!Lethimontothebus!”Iwillneverknowifitwasbecauseofher

voice,butthankfullyI,whowasunableeventosit,wascarriedontothefloorofthebus.Ilater

learnedthatthebusthatsavedmewasfromOhnouraGarrison.

Thebus transportedus toOhnouraon theopposite shore from Itsukushima.Therewe

werehousedataneighborhoodelementaryschool,but forsomereasonwewere laiddownin

the schoolyard, not in the school building. The followingmorning, under the blazing summer

heat, I lay outdoors and the treatment ofmywounds began. That treatmentwas truly hellish

agony.WhatpainIsufferedasthewoundbelowmyearwassterilizedwithoutanyanesthesia!It

wassuchextremepain,asthoughIwerebeingstabbedwithred-hottongs,thatthesufferingput

meonthebrinkofdeathduetoshock.Andthen,asthemilitaryphysiciansuturedmywounds,

hewas in such apanic that hebrokenot only the threadbut also theneedle. “Wait here!” he

ordered,andaftera littlewhile, those sameburning-hot tongs returned!As thecombatmedic

nexttomecried,“It’snouse;theseintestinescannotbesaved,”itwastrulyascenestraightfrom

hell.

Thecurseoftheatomicbombbroughtsuchagonybeyonddescription,thatlanguagelacks

themeans toexpress.Asaconsequenceofbeingexposed toradiationandhavingwhiteblood

cellsdestroyed,thewoundsofatomicbombsurvivorsfesteredandfilledwithpus.Afterhaving

enduredsuchextremepaintohavemywoundsutured,noweverylastthreadhadtobecutout,

exposingahideousopenwound.Thatso-called“atomicbombkeloid”scarwouldtormentmefor

manyyears.

AroundthetimeIhadatlastgrownaccustomedtothepain,IheardoftheSovietUnion’s

participation in thewar andprayed for the safetyofmyparents inMukden.Also around that

time,anelderlyladycametolookafterthewoundedandsick.“Mydear,Idon’tknowyou,butmy

sonisasoldierjustlikeyou,”shesaidwithtearsstreamingdownherface,assheusedawooden

spoontopourporridgeintomymouth.ItwaswhileIwasrecuperatinghereforsometimethat

mycousinDoiborrowedacharcoal-poweredvehiclefromwhoknowswhereandcartedmeto

hishouse.Doiwasstillahighschoolstudent.HisfamilywerefarmersinthevillageofHachiman

inthenorthernpartofHiroshimaPrefecture.Althoughmyquarterswerethefamilybarn,itwas

sufficienttorestmybodyandrecuperate.

From about the beginning of 1943, America had devoted huge sums to undertake the

developmentoftheatomicbombandhadfinallyachievedsuccessonJuly16th1945,twentydays

13

prior to the detonation of the atomic bomb onHiroshima. The pilot of the B-29 bomber that

contained the atomic bomb, Colonel Paul Tibbets (thirty years old at the time), had gained

distinctionasarenownedbomberpilotandhadbeenpulledfromtheEuropeanfronttocometo

TinianIsland.Hehadnamedthebomberafterhismother,EnolaGay.TheEnolaGaystartedoff

fromTinianIsland,oneoftheMarianaIslandsinthewesternPacificOcean,whichAmericahad

capturedonAugust3rd1944afterafiercebattlewithJapanesearmedforces.Priortothis,thirty

kilometerswestofTinian Island,Saipanhadalsobeencapturedon July18th,andthe Japanese

militaryairfieldsonbothislandswereoutfittedbyAmericanarmedforces.Itwasfrombothof

theseairfieldsthatU.S.forcesairraidedtheJapanesemainlandforthenexttenmonths,reducing

theprincipalcitiesofJapantoscorchedearth.

NowduringtheMeijiera,troopsweregarrisonedinHiroshima,theforemostcityinthe

Chugokuregion.Withitshigh-trafficUjinaNavalPort,Hiroshimaheldanimportantpositionasa

militarycapital.Consequently,withstrongprotectionagainstairraids,Hiroshimasufferedlittle

damage from them. Soon afterAmerica’s successfulmanufacture of the atomic bomb, theUSS

IndianapolistransportedthebombfromSanFranciscotoTinianIsland.OnAugust5ththeatomic

bombwasloadedontotheEnolaGay,whichtookoffthefollowingmorningat2:25a.m.Having

reachedtheskiesofHiroshima,theEnolaGaydroppedtheatomicbombfromanaltitudeof9600

meters, fifteenminutesand thirtysecondsafter8a.m.Groundzero isestimated toberoughly

150meterssoutheastofthesiteoftheHiroshimaPeaceMemorial,commonlycalledtheAtomic

BombDome.Togetherwithaviolentexplosion,theatomicbombgeneratedafireballinmidairof

approximatelyonehundredmetersindiameter.Thecenterofthefireballreachedatemperature

of300,000ºC,exposinggroundzero to irradiationof6000ºC.Allwoodenhomeswithina two-

kilometerradiuscollapsedandcaughtfirefromtheheatrays,causingacitywideconflagration.

Although some concrete buildings like the Atomic Bomb Dome remained standing, windows

wereblownawayandtheinteriorwasdestroyedbyfire.

Thedestructivemightoftheatomicbombwasduetothecompositepowerofthebomb

blast,detonationpressureandheatrays,butthecasualtieswereduetothe invisibleradiation.

Moreover,anymaterialthatwasexposedtoradiationbecametingedwithradioactivity,andfora

long timeafterwardemitted radiation (particlebeamsof rays suchasalpha,beta, andgamma

rays),causingobstaclessuchashairloss,highfever,vomiting,vomitingofblood,bloodybowel

discharge,andbloodyurine.

14

At the same time as the violent explosion, the atomic bomb created an enormous

mushroomcloud,thestemofwhichswelledintoanimmensepillarbeforeone’seyes,traveling

northwest (inland). Before long a downpour blanketed the northern andwestern parts of the

city.Whileheavyraincontinuedtofall fortwotothreehours, foraboutthefirsthourtherain

wasblack.Thisblackraincarriedbothashthatascendedasblacksmokeatthemomentofthe

bombblastandsoot fromtheconflagrationandwas ladenwithradioactivity.Therefore, those

who were showered with this rain suffered the same symptoms as those subject to direct

radiation.Furthermore,asthisrainwaterflowedintorivers,fishessuchascatfish,eelsandpond

carpalldiedandfloatedtothesurface.Duringtherainfall,temperaturesdroppedand,despiteit

beingmidsummer,thosewhowerelightlydressedshiveredinthecold.

Bytheendofthisyear,140,000liveswerelostinHiroshima.

Myrelatives,thefarmers,werekindenoughtotakecareofme.Althoughtheyhadneither

medicinenortheresourcesformedicalcare,onedaytheycarriedmeonastretchertoanearby

clinic.However,thisclinichadonlyahypodermicinjectionresemblingredink.Myauntthanked

thedoctorswithgiftssuchasriceandvegetablesinsteadofmoney.Itriedmoxibustion,having

heardarumorthat itmightbebeneficial,andwhetherduetothatornot,myhealth improved

daybyday.Ihadlotsofmoxaappliedfromheadtotoeonadailybasis,thankfullybymycousin

who had come to help. Apparently, it had long been common knowledge that moxibustion

increasedwhitebloodcellcounts!

AsthewarendedandIcompletelyregainedmyhealth,Iexpressedmygratitudetothose

whohadcared formeand told thegrandmotherwhohadmostdotedonme, “Iwant togo to

Tokyo.” She begged me, “Masaru dear, stay in Hiroshima. Don’t leave here anymore.”

Nevertheless, I apologized to her in my heart “Sorry, grandmother,” and took the national

railway ticket I had been supplied with and set off for the end of war processing office in

Nishinomiya. “Thankyou foryourservice!”Theseweremywordsas Igave theex-generalmy

name and platoon, and at last I received my identification papers as a Japanese citizen. The

sorrowof losing thewarmeant that, after the collapseof the army,my identityhadnotbeen

recognizeduntilthatday.

Carryingtheentiretyofmyworldlypossessions,theoneblanketandthemilitaryuniform

Ihadbeenprovided,IcametoliveatthehomeofmyuncleinTokyo.Bythistimeitwasalready

mid-Octoberof1945!WhenIreturnedtomybelovedschool,althoughIhadbeensureIwould

15

neverlayeyesonitagain,everyonesaid“Lookatthismonster!”butwelcomedmewarmly.The

schoolpromotedmetojunioryear,andinMarchof1947,Igraduated,orrather,Iwasmadeto

graduate,afterfouryearsatuniversitythatincludedonlyabouttwoyearsworthofstudy.(And

this after having served my country at the risk of my life!) But I must be grateful; I was

miraculouslysavedfromdeathinthatgreatwar.

After graduation, I sought to make up for the studies I lacked and I entered graduate

school. Thereupon, while still enrolled as a graduate student and taking classes, I joined the

orchestra personnel and in addition was asked to instruct students as a part-time lecturer. I

served as a part-time lecturer at Tokyo University of the Arts, formerly known as the Tokyo

AcademyofMusic,for49yearsthereafter,includingtwoyearsofmilitaryserviceandoneyear

studyingabroadinAmerica.Alongtheway,therewastalkofapermanentposition,butbesides

teachingintheflutedepartment,IwantedtoremainactiveasacomposersoIbecamethathappy

musicianchasingtwodreamsatonce.

ImarriedmywifeTaekowhen Iwas29yearsold.Taekowasaviolinmajorand three

yearsmyjuniorattheacademyofmusic.Duringmypostwarenrollmentasastudent,Ialways

hadabandagewrappedaroundmyneckforthetreatmentoftheatomicbombkeloidundermy

leftear.ApparentlyTaekoKoidesawthatandthought,“Thatpoorperson.”BecauseIhadbeen

told that keloid surgery was very dangerous, I endured the pain for many years, but in the

sixtiethyearafter thewar, sevenyearsagonow,a renownedorthopedic surgeonatSt.Luke’s

International Hospital in Tsukiji, Tokyo, successfully removed the keloid. Perhaps because

shardsofglasshadflownintothiswoundonthedayoftheatomicbomb,foralongtimeafterthe

war, small grains of glass would come out of my left earlobe from time to time. My friends

cheerfullyconsoledme,saying“Look,you’reproducingdiamonds!”

At present,my family of ten, includingmyself, are enjoying fullness of life asmuch as

anyoneelse.Moreover,Iamblessedtobesurroundedbymanytalentedpeople,tooadmirableto

becalledmystudents.Asacomposer,Ileavebehindatriple-digitnumberofcompositionssuch

assonatas,marchesandchoralmusic.AndthewonderfulnewsoflateisthatonSeptember6thof

thisyear2011,WaldsteinPalaceHallinPraguewillseethepremiereofmyStringQuartetNo.1,

whichmaybeconsideredthepinnacleofmywork.

16

Theatomicbombandensuingscenesfromhell,thesearesuchbitterlypainfulthingsthat

Idonotwanttodiscuss,but it ismyhopethatmywordsmaysomehowserveour longingfor

peaceandthecessationofwar.

–writtenin2011