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CRYSTAL

THE

HOTEL & BALLROOM

CRYSTAL BALLROOM

14th and W. Burnside

836 N RUSSELL PORTLAND, OR (503)

282-6810

music at 8:30 P.m. mon-thur9:30 P.m. fri & sat

(unless otherwise noted)

Event and movie info at

mcmenamins.com/mission

Mission

TheaTer1624 N.W. Glisan Portland 503-223-4527

The historic

Live sTage & big screen!

Live sTage & big screen!

Call our movie hotline to findout whats playing this week!

(503) 249-7474

Saturday, November 12Miz Kittys Parlour

Sunday, November 13Fleur de Lethal Cinemathequeand houseofsound.org:Straight To Hell (1987)

Sunday, November 13 & December 18Crafty Underdog

Tuesday, November 1 5OMSI Science Pub:Blue Revolution:A Water Ethic for America

Wednesday, November 16PDX Jazz presents:Saxophonist Miguel Zennand Quartet

Monday, November 21History Talk: Politics andCrime in Portland: DrugEnforcement in the 1980s

Friday, November 25Opera vs. Cinema: The BlackPirate vs. The Flying Dutchman

Saturday, December 3Pert Near SandstoneLeft Coast Country

Saturday, December 17Santacon Pub Crawl

Saturday, December 31Talkdemonic

Als Den

FREE

LIVE MUSIC EVEry nIght 7 PM

Nov 912 Jared MeesNov 1319 Evan Way

(of the Parson Red Heads)

Nov 10 DJ Anjali &

the Incredible Kid Every ThursdayNov 11 DJ Hwy 7Nov 12 DJ Lord Smithingham

Every Thursday, Friday & SaturdayDJS 10:30 PM

m

cmenamins musicM c M e n a M i n s . c o M

doorS 8p muSIC 9p unleSS noTeddanceonair.com

11/10 they might Be giants 11/12 Blitzen trapper 11/12 jai hO!-lolas 11/15 the Civil wars 11/25 stOne in lOve-lolas 12/5 d2r: yOung the giant

12/6 d2r: fOster the peOple 12/7 d2r: awOlnatiOn 12/8 d2r: death CaB fOr Cutie 12/9 d2r: pOrtugal the man12/10 d2r: the jOy fOrmidaBle/grOuplOve 12/12 OCOte sOul sOunds-lolas 12/16 dinOsaur jr/sCratCh aCid

1/28 mOe. 2/17 Big head tOdd and the mOnsters 2/24 pdx jazz festival: Bill frisell 2/25 pdx jazz festival: vijay iyer, prasanna& nitin mitta (3 pm) 2/25 pdx jazz festival: Charlie hunter (9:30 pm) 3/2 & 3 railrOad earth 3/22 kaiser Chiefs

wed nov 23

all ages

BLIND PILOTfri nov 18all ages

wednesday, november 9

left coast countryfree

thursday, november 105:30 p.m. is eagle time free

the sale

gabby holtfree

frIday, november 115:30 p.m. is eagle time free

reverb brothersradIo gIants

the snapperheads9 p.m.

saturday, november 124:30 p.m. is eagle time free

the student loan

wInebIrdssome kInd of safarI

bIrger olsen

sunday, november 13open mIc/sInger

songwrIter showcasefeaturing portlands finest talent6:30 p.m. sign-up; 7 p.m. music free

monday, november 14

jack ruby presents

johnheartjackIevIolet Islefree

tuesday, november 15brad creel and the reel deel

free

McMenamins and Monqui present

NEWYEARSEVEw/

The Suicide NotesSUPERSUCKERS

sat dec 31

21 & over

thur nov 17

all ages

aladdIn theater& monquI present

blake

Mills

LUCINDAWILLIAMS

LUCINDAWILLIAMS

Point Juncture, WA

fri nov 11

all ages

Keys N Krates

tyler tastemaKer

mmnins nd abstrt erth prsnt

80s VIDEODANCE ATTACKFRIDAY, NOVEMBER 11LOLASROOM9 PM $5 21+OVER

WITH VJ KITTYROX

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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR115 SW Ash St., Ste 600, Portland, OR 97204lovenotes@portlandmercury.com Letters may be edited for space consideration.

Or leave a comment on portlandmercury.com

LYNCH VS. LAURELHURST

DEAR MERCURYOutside of the Po-

lice Blotter your parody wasnt very funny

[Heres Your Troutdale Trout! Feature,

Oct 27, in which theMercury dressed up

for Halloween as a small-town publication].

I lived in Laurelhurst, and later I lived in

Troutdale for a year. The second-rate com-

edy show on the IFC [Portlandia] remind-

ed me very much of Laurelhurst. Living in

Troutdale reminded me of the best series of

all time: Twin Peaks. InMulholland Drive,

[David] Lynch puts the character of Adam,

the pretentious, smug film director of the

overpaid creative class, against the Cow-

boy. The Cowboy is like Troutdale: genuine,

small town, intense, rooted in the past, per-haps. Adam is the elitist journalist class, the

six percent, Laurelhurst and places like it,

and people of that sort. Guess whose side

David Lynch is on??

El Zivodar

JUST ASKIN

DEAR MR. THERIAULTAfter wit-

nessing the removal of Occupy Wall Street

protesters [AKA Occupy Portland pro-

testers] in Jamison Square in the heart

of the Pearl, I cannot help but ask the

question: Did our public officials cave to

pressure from the more affluent residents

of Portland? The explanation was that the

protesters were disturbing the tenants of

surrounding Jamison Square. Dont people

live near Chapman or Lownsdale Square?

Doesnt federal (constitutional) law trump

city convenience ordinances? Just askin

Katherine Gibson

OCCUPY THE GREENDEAR MERCHave been in Portland

since before many of yall were born [Oc-

cupy My Lunch Break, Letters, Nov 3,

in which a reader complains that the Oc-

Portland. Occupy them.

Brian A. Cobb

SCARCASTIC POWERS

DEAR EDITORI was thrilled to read

your profile of Bridget Pilloud, Pet Detec-tive [The Pet Whisperer, Feature, Nov 3,

an interview with a local intuitive who has

worked extensively with animals]. Like

Ms. Pilloud Im also a real psychic. I dont

specialize in pets like Ms. Pilloud, but I am

excellent at communicating with newspaper

editors, who as we all know are far more

difficultand dangerousto communicate

with than your average disgruntled dog.

With my magical powers, I can help you

understand why Wm. Steven Humphrey issuch an asshole, and help you understand

why your papers occasional insightful news

stories are watered down with so much or-

ganic, grade-A bullshit. I can also match

Ms. Pillouds pricesId be happy to pro-

vide your staff with Life Shift Sessions for a

mere $859, beating Ms. Pilloud by 40 bucks!

I look forward to next weeks profile of Gan-

dalf the Greys Tarot Card Emporium.

Michael

WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY RE-

SPONDS: Thanks for your letter, Michael!

Though I dont give two shits about Life

Shift Sessions for my staff (fuck em), I am

interested to know how much you charge

for helping me understand why Im an

asshole. My own pursuit has yielded no

results.

AAANNNNND, even though he insulted

our totes fave pet psychic and suggested

our editor in chief is an asshole, Mi-chael wins the letter of the week, because

it was kind of funny. You win two tick-

ets to the Laurelhurst Theater, asshole!

AND SPEAKING OF LIFE-SHIFTING

CRYSTAL

THE

HOTEL & BALLROOM

CRYSTAL BALLROOM

14th and W. Burnside

11/10 they might be giants 11/12 blitzen trapper 11/15 the civil wars12/5 D2r: young the giant 12/6 D2r: foster the people 12/7 D2r: awolnation

12/8 D2r: Death cab for cutie 12/9 D2r: portugal the man 12/10 D2r: the joy formiDable/grouplove12/12 ocote soul sounDs-lola's 12/16 Dinosaur jr/scratch aciD 1/28 moe.

2/24 pDx jazz festival: bill frisell 2/25 pDx jazz festival: vijay iyer, prasanna & nittin mitta (3 pm)2/25 pDx jazz festival: charlie hunter (9:30 pm) 3/2 & 3 railroaD earth 3/22 kaiser chiefs

doors 8p music 9p unless noted www.danceonair.com

danceonair.com

fri nov 18

all ages

McMenamins and Monqui present

NEWYEARSEVEw/

The Suicide NotesSUPERSUCKERS

sat dec 3121 & over

tICKEtS

ON SALE

NOW!

BLIND PILOT

wed nov 23

all ages

thur nov 17

all ages

aladdin theater

& monqui present

blake

Mills

LUCINDAWILLIAMS

LUCINDAWILLIAMS

Point Juncture, WA

fri nov 11

all ages

Keys N Krates

tyler tastemaKer

mcmenamins and abstract earth present

80s VIDEODANCE ATTACKFRIDAY, NOVEMBER 119 PM $5 21+OVERWITH VJ KITTYROX

LOLA'S ROOM

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Lean&GreenA SimpleGuide toWater-wiseLawnCare

10 Easy Ways to ReduceYour Outdoor Water Use

1. Adjust your sprinklers to avoid watering

pavement and other things that dont grow.

2. Dont water when its windy or raining.

3. Avoid daytime watering. Its best to water

between midnight and sunrise.

4. Sprinklers are great for turfgrass, but use

drip irrigation or soaker hoses on flowers,

shrubs, gardens and trees.

5. Spread mulch around flowers, shrubs,trees

and garden plants to retain soil moisture.

6. Dont plant grass on steep slopes.

7. Dont put grass in areas lessthan 10 feet wide.

8. Hand-water dry spots rather than over-

watering the entire lawn.

9. Install a shutoff nozzle on your hose.

10. Xeriscape!

City of Albuquerque

Water Resources

505-768-3655

State Engineer Office

Water Conservation Program

505-827-3879

Cooperative Extension Service

Refer to the county government list-

ings in your local telephone directory.

Suggested Reading

Natural By Design and Plants for Natural

Gardens (a two-volume series) by Judith Phillips.

Museum of New Mexico Press, P.O. Box 2087,

Santa Fe, New Mexico 87504

Sunset Western Garden BookKathleen N.

Brenzel, Editor. Sunset Publishing Corporation,

Menlo Park, CA 94025

Complete Guide to Gardening & Landscaping

Time-Life Books, Inc., New York, N.Y.

SAVE: The Homeowners Guide to Using

Water WiselyTucson Water Conservation Office,

P.O. Box 27210, Tucson, AZ 85726-7210

Water Efficient Landscape Guidelines

by Richard Bennett and Michael Hazinski.American Water Works Association, 6666 West

Quincy Avenue, Denver, CO 80235

All About Lawns Ortho Books, San Francisco,

CA. Ordering Address: Solaris Group, Customer

Service, 2527 Camino Ramon, Suite 200, San

Ramon, CA 94583; 800-457-6900

Xeriscape Plant GuideDenver Water. Fulcrum

Publishing, 350 Indiana St., Suite 350, Golden,

CO 80401; 800-992-2908

Photography by Charles Mann

Blue Grama Grass

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LawnsAreThirsty

Lets face it, most lawn grasses are not

native to New Mexico. These grasses cant

survive our hot, dry climate without signifi-

cant additional water. Some lawn grasses

require up to four times the water New

Mexico receives from annual rainfall.

During the hotter summer months, over

half of our water consumption occurs out-

side our homeslargely to water our lawns.

Believe it or not, some people actually

give their lawns up to three times more

water than is necessary for healthy growth

and maintenance.

So, if youre planning a new landscape,

consider a water-wise xeriscape (which can

even include a drought-tolerant lawn). But

if you have an existing thirsty lawn that

you dont want to replace, use the tips in

this brochure to water wisely.

Accept Less FromYourLawn

During the hottest months, cool season

grass may not look its best. When condi-

tions become more favorable, it will readily

regenerate. Accept that your grass wont

look perfect. (And try to reduce foot traffic

on dry turf areas.)

Buffalograss A warm-season grass that

needs less water than virtually all other lawns.

It thrives in hot, sunny locations. Buffalograss

is low-growing, so frequent mowing isnt neces-

sary. It spreads by surface runners (stolons)

and by seed. Buffalograss seed, plugs and sod

are available at most nurseries.

Bermuda A deep-rooted, warm-season grass

that uses about two-thirds as much water as

bluegrass. Be cautiousbermuda grass is very

invasive and may intrude on flower beds and

other plants. Its green in summer, dormant and

brown in the winter.

Blue Grama This warm-season grass, which is

commonly mixed with buffalograss, makes a won-

derful alternative to thirstier bluegrass. Its thin

blades give a blue grama lawn a pleasing, finetexture. Its easy to establish and fills in quickly.

Tall Fescue A deep-rooted, cool-season grass

that needs less frequent watering than bluegrass,

but still uses far more water than buffalograss or

blue grama. Tall fescue is more tolerant of foot

traffic and shade than bluegrass.It greens up early

in the spring and stays green long into autumn.

Buffalograss

Water-wiseGrasses Warm-season grasses will be brown and dormant during the winter months, and green in

the summer. Cool-season grasses are most vigorous in the spring and fall, and retain some color all year long.

Instead of using grasses that need lots of supplemental water, considerdrought-tolerantalternatives:

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Mowing Tips1. Mow Early. Mowing when its still cool reduces

the stress on a lawn.

2. Mow Sharp. Dull mower blades tear the grass

blades, creating unnecessary stress on the lawn.

3. Mow Higher. Longer grass blades promote

deeper rooting and shade the plants root zone, so

the grass needs less water. A good rule of thumb:

never cut off more than 1/3 of the leaf blade.

Recommended Mowing Height

Bermuda 1.5"

Bluegrass 2"

Buffalograss 3.5"

Tall Fescue 3.5"

TheCatchCanTest!Start by finding out how much water comes out

of your sprinklers and how evenly the water is dis-

persed. Place six tin cans of equal size around the

yard and turn your sprinklers on for10 minutes.

Check the depth of water collected in each can.

If each can has about the same amount of water,

your sprinklers are delivering an even amount

throughout your yardand thats exactly what you

want. However, if some areas are receiving more

water than others, you may need to adjust or

replace some or all of your sprinkler heads. (See

the Sprinkler Tips section.)

Now pour all the water from the six cans into

one can. Measure the depth of that water. The

result is the inches per hour that your sprinklersystem delivers.

Your local water utility or cooperative extension

office can help you determine how much water

your lawn needs.

Avoid Runoff ByCyclingPop-up lawn sprinklers apply water at a rate of

between one to five inches per hour. Most New

Mexico soils cant absorb water as quickly as sprink-

lers apply it, resulting in wasteful runoff.

To reduce runoff, use the cycling method. Run

your sprinklers for a short time, turn them off for

30-60 minutes, then repeat the process until youve

applied the required amount of water. (Most auto-

matic timers will allow you to do this.) The cycling

method gives each dose of water a chance to reach

the rootswhere it does the most good.

In addition to cycling, water penetration can be

enhanced by core aerating, dethatching and edging

along hard surfaces.

Fertilize ProperlyUsing the right amount of fertilizer at the right

time can help a lawn stay healthy and water-wise.

Determine what fertilizer is recommended for

your grass. Fertilize cool season grasses (bluegrass

and fescue) in the spring and fall. Fertilize warm

season grasses (bermuda, zoysia, buffalograss) in

early and late summer.

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WATER USE ANDCONSERVATION BUREAU

New Mexico Office of theState Engineer

Every gallon of wateryou conserve will reduceyour monthly water bill.

Follow these tips toensure that your clotheswasher uses water asefficiently as possible.

Wash full loads. A full load is the mostwater-efficient way to wash your clothes.(This is true even if your machine has anadjustable load setting.)

If your clothes washer does have anadjustable load setting, select a smallersetting for a smaller load.

When washing lightly soiled clothes, usethe shortest wash cycle

In addition, some cities and towns in NewMexico offer rebates to homeowners whoreplace older water-using appliances (such asclothes washers and toilets) with new water-wise models. Call your local water utility tofind out how you can qualify for rebates andreceive more information about reducingwater use in your home.

WATER USE AND

CONSERVATION BUREAUNew Mexico Office of theState EngineerP.O. Box 25102Santa Fe, NM 87504-51021-800-WATER-NMwww.seo.state.nm.us

Funded by a grant from the U.S Environmental Protection Agency.Produced for the New Mexico Office of the State Engineer bySchultz Communications. Designed by Ken Wilson Design.

Sources: American Council for an Energy-Efficient Economy, Asko,The City of Albuquerque, General Electric, KitchenAid, Maytag,Rocky Mountain Institute, Sears, Whirlpool, www.doityourself.com,

www.energystar.gov, www.h2ouse.org. Photos courtesy of GE,Whirlpool and Sears.

If your washing machineis not maintained in topoperating condition, you

could be wasting water.Some common clotheswasher problems can befixed by do-it-yourselfers,

but others need the services of a licensedplumber or appliance repair technician. NOTE:Make sure you unplug the machine beforeattempting any repairs; in some cases, you willneed to shut off the water supply as well.

DOES YOUR WASHING MACHINE LEAK?You may need to tighten the water-inlet valvesor hose connections. Check the hoses for cracksor kinks, too. Make sure the drain hose isinserted properly in the drain pipe or drainbasin.

IS WATER LEAKING FROM THE PUMP?If water leaks from the pump, tighten orreplace the clamps. If water still leaks, replacethe pump.

IS YOUR WASHING MACHINE SLOW TOFILL UP?Check the hoses and the water-inlet valves.

If the hoses have water in them, the water-inlet valve is probably defective and will needto be replaced.

NEED MORE INFORMATION?Check your owners manual topinpoint specific trouble areas orcall the manufacturers toll-freecustomer service number. For addi-tional information, visit manufac-turers websites for troubleshootingtips. Also visit sites such aswww.doityourself.com, or use yourfavorite search engine to find otherhome improvement sites.

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In the typical home, washing clothes consumesmore indoor water than anything except flush-ing the toilets. (If youve already converted

your older toilets to more efficient low-flowmodels, then your clothes washer might benumero uno when it comes to indoor wateruse.) Because water use is a major concernhere in the desert climates of New Mexico-andbecause washing clothes is such a water-intensiveactivity, its important to make sure yourclothes washer is as water-wise as possible.

NEXT-GENERATION WASHING MACHINESARE STINGY WITH WATER

The typical older washing machine (pre-1995)uses approximately 41 gallons per load. By

comparison, newer clothes washers generallyuse 23 gallons or less. That means you canreduce your water bill and save thousands ofgallons of water each year by choosing a newwater-efficient clothes washer when its timeto replace your old washer.

There are two basic designs for clothes washers:top-loading and front-loading. Most older-model residential washing machines load fromthe top. However, a standard top-loadingmachine can use more water to fill up and wetthe clothes thoroughly. In addition, themachine uses more energy to pull the clothes

around the machine using the agitator arm.

Most of the newer,water- and energy-efficient machines arefront-loading. A front-loaded machine allowsclothes to fall as theyspin, which uses lesswater and is gentler onfabrics. Front-loadingwashing machines canbe more convenient fordisabled homeownersto use, too.

TIPS FOR BUYING A NEWCLOTHES WASHER

Replacing your old water-guzzlingclothes washer with a new water-efficient model can dramatically reduce

your indoor water use. New-generationclothes washers also spin clothes drier,thus reducing drying time and savingenergy. The top brands and mostefficient models of clothes washers maycost more initially, but the savings youreceive in reduced water, gas orelectricity and detergent will saveyou money over the lifetime of use.

Here are some questions to ask thesalesperson when shopping for a newwashing machine:

Is this a water-efficient machine?Is it Energy Star approved?

How many gallons of water per loadwill I save, compared to the oldermodel of this machine? Compared tomy present machine?

Does this washer have a water-saveroption, to allow rinse water to bereused?

Does this machine automaticallyadjust the water level needed for theload being washed?

What is the average annual watercost to operate this machine?

What is the average annual energycost to operate this machine?

Is there an Extra Rinse option? If so,how do I shut off this option?

LOOK FOR THE ENERGY STAR LABELThe Energy Star program, administered through theU.S. Environmental Protection Agency, recognizes ener-gy-efficient washing machines that can save from 35%to 50% in energy and water use over standard washingmachines. Participating Energy Star manufacturers offerall sizes and types of clothes washing machines. Formore information, including specific models and howmuch money you can save by using an Energy Starlabeled washer, visit the website atwww.energystar.gov/products/clotheswashers/.