MM..AA..RR..CC..II..

Our Mission: To create a unified

community of compassionate holistic practitioners that will contribute to enhancing our profession and ourselves by providing a supportive space to share, learn, teach, grow

and lead.

My Vision: “To strengthen and support the community of holistic

professionals.” --Linda Mitchell-Dominguez

HMN Founder Newsletter Editor GREGG TAYLOR

www.mentorshipnetwork.com

I'd like to tell you a story, the source of which is unknown. A wise old

woman is teaching her grandson about life:

"A fight is going on inside me," she said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, seren-

WWhhoolleenneessss tthhrroouugghh SSppiirriittuuaall IInntteeggrraattiioonn

TAI CHI: In Search of True Self by Ameurfina H. Nazario The Ultimate Fist Tai Chi means “Ultimate Fist”. An internal martial art whose concepts were shaped by Taoist philo-sophy and Eastern medi-cine, Tai Chi is the funda-mental expression of Tao. From a quiet and centered self, a Tai Chi disciple will set into a graceful and meditative motion a series of choreographed post-ures, moving chi or vital life force to cultivate phys-iccal well-being, spiritual fulfillment, and happiness.

ity, humility, kindness, bene-volence, empathy, generos-ity, truth, compassion, and faith. This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too," she said.

The grandson thought for a minute and then asked his grandmother, "which wolf will win?" The wise old woman simply replied, "The one you feed."

.

The Study of Tai Chi Tai Chi may seem to be a mere physical exercise at first. Soon enough, the realization will come that it is more than a physical exercise. Practicing Tai Chi will quickly bring into the self the awareness of the emotional body, the mental body, and the spiritual body in addition to the physical body. To a novice, foremost to study of Tai Chi is the learning of the external postures or forms. The student starts by The

The student starts by train-ing how to perform the forms, exploring such prin-ciples of substantial and insubstantial; moving as a unit; yielding and following external forces; using no extra effort; being in the pre-sent moment; controlling internal energy at will; and avoiding double-weightiness. As the learning progresses, the student becomes more sensitive to the flow of chi and thus starts to understand how to direct the chi through-out the body. The conditioning of the aspect of art. Finally, the Tai Chi practitioner is able to unify and integrate the internal and external moves for achieving total

Mindfulness Awareness Responsibility

Compassion Intuition

The Holistic Mentorship Network

Winter 2006-2007

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1 Shortened for Poon. Poon is one of the Pilipino names for God. Other names are Bathala, Diyos, May Kapal and Panginoon.

Let’s Go for a Run by Linda Mitchell-Dominguez, Founder

The conditioning of the spirit also takes place through the contemplative aspect of the art. Finally, the Tai Chi practitioner is able to unify and integrate the internal and external moves for achieving total harmony.

The Benefits of Tai Chi

The consistent practice of Tai Chi makes the chi grow and flow within the body that provides a homeostatic effect bring-ing physiological and psychological processes into balance. Tai Chi improves the functions of the nervous system and internal organs. It helps tone the muscles, tendons, ligaments, and connective tissues. There is greater elasticity of the lungs and improved circulation. It relieves stress and reduces blood pressure.

TAI CHI: In Search of True Self by Ameurfina H. Nazario continued

found that I was free. I was so enthralled by the energy, various speakers and the honorees in that room. There was a var-iety of ways I could partici-pate that could have been much gentler on my body, but I didn’t see, or realize what I was about to com-mit to. I know there were many friends and family who doubted my ability to run 26.2 miles (that’s how many miles in a full mara-thon). I, too, am sure if I had known then what I do

The spirit is enlivened as the practitioner exudes the vir-tues of patience, compass-sion, love, kindness, grati-tude, generosity, empathy, and helpfulness.

Exploring Tao and Poon in Tai Chi

In the Philippines, when seeking entrance to some-one’s home, the outsider knocks on the door and identifies himself as human (Tao) and addresses the person inside as God (Po

1).

The knocking is followed by the utterance of “Tao Po,” which simply means (I am) human, (let me in) God. The Philippine culture has imbued into the Filipino psyche the intrinsic wisdom and decree to respect and honor all human beings as

God and humbly see them-selves as the essence of humankind.

In Chinese, Tao means “The Way.” It takes the form of two opposites, Yin and Yang, through which one’s true nature is revealed. Tao is the guiding principle of the ancient philosophy of Taoism. It leads to the path where everything is possible through inner transformation. To follow Tao (The Way), the devotee enga-ges in the daily practice of Tai Chi. The practice opens the door to the inner sanctum, the divine consciousness, for the devotee who is Tao (Human). Upon entering, the Tao finds unity within, and acknowled-ges the Po (God) in oneself. Thus, God is the true self. -----AHN

now, I would have put odds on my insanity. As with anything, we con-front obstacles, challenges, and our greatest fear of failure. But, at that moment, for my sister, I only had one desire and that was to do for her what I couldn’t do before for myself ---I only now begin to realize how profound life can be, those that are our greatest teachers and how our lives can change at any moment…The desire to follow our dreams, visions

Editor’s Note: The author is a Tai Chi practitioner and founder of Moment’um, a holistic health organization whose mission is to help bring into harmony one’s body, mind, emotions, and spirit. She inte-grates Asian healing traditions in her prac-tice, which she named Diwa, a Philippine word for consciousness. Affil-iated with Atlantic Health, she teaches Qi Gong and Tai Chi at the Mind-Body Center. She is also the Tai Chi/Qi Gong Movement Clinician at the Cardiac Unit and Carol Simon Cancer Center of the Morristown Memorial Hospital. For more infor-mation on group classes and individual sessions, please email momentaum@yahoo.com or

call 973-539-5828.

In 2004 I ran a marathon.

Having never been a run-ner this was quite an undertaking, but was ini-tiated with the desire to do something in memory of my sister, Mary Lou, who died of Leukemia when she was six-years-old (I was almost five). I had received a letter in the mail about a fundraiser that was being held in various locations for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.

I had checked the date of that first meeting and

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and honoring our heart’s desire can seem so foreign by ego’s ability to throw any of us off track and lose our way.

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“…It’s amazing how powerful our thoughts can be…”

In those five hours, fifty-seven minutes, and thirty-four sec-onds, I experienced every challenge that you could pos-sibly imagine that takes some-times a lifetime plus to go through. The obstacles were many---- first, having colitis, and the fear of having an attack while training and during the mara-thon…my gypsy life and work schedule impacted the avail-ability I had to train with the TNT (Team-In-Training). And, like the old adage, it was winter, and I hated to be cold.

Let’s Go for a Run by Linda Mitchell-Dominguez, Founder continued

So, when I hit that first 9-10-mile mark, it was no wonder my hips were cry-ing. The most I had train-ed for was ten miles. They call that “hitting the wall,” usually that comes at the 20

th mile or so. The

dread of failure---who did I think I was? Such self pity I indulged myself in, and then the real kicker: all those who supported me in prayer and donations that I would let down--Sound familiar? The next six miles would be critical in order to stay in the race----I needed to

meet that 16-mile mark within four hours in order to stay in the mar-athon. I don’t know if the stabbing pain that shifted from my hips to my right knee was as bad as the pain I was feeling in my heart, but having met other runners and walkers, I noticed a fellow, who was struggl-ing to keep pace and not give up. Amazing how reaching out to another person can help you meet your own goals. And so, I hit that 16-mile mark with bare-

ly enough time left to spare. It’s amazing how powerful our thoughts can be, I remember thinking to myself while I was treading ground to get to the sixteenth mile, please let my niece, who was planning on being there, be at the 16-18

th

mile.

Lo and behold, not

knowing where I would be, she too was praying to her Angels to guide her to where she would find me. As she reared her car around the next bend, she found herself in front of Saint Michael’s Church. Talk about miracles…. She was my Angel. Not only was she there for me, (where I needed her to be), but then she decided to run with me. She sup-ported and motivated me through every agonizing step to my next challenge when she left me to face… myself.

It was in that moment that I truly felt alone, with only my-self to motivate and move forward. By this point, I had no idea how much further I had to go----maybe five or six miles---maybe less. The only thing I knew I needed to do, was to finish within six-and-a-half hours and I had one-and-a-half hours left. With the pressure still remaining, I noticed the woman behind me holding the six-hour flag (there were several flag holders through-out the marathon, holding flags that indicated the time you would finish at, if you kept the flag holders pace). Trying to keep my pace ahead of her, I began feel-ing as if the Grim Reaper was following me. Then, as I reached the twenty-five-mile marker, the woman with the six-hour flag started to get ahead of me. I knew she was a few minutes ahead of

herself, but time was nar-rowing, with a half-hour remaining and, as I was into the twenty-fifth mile, it dawned on me that I might still have another mile to go once I hit the 26-mile marker (I am sure I was delirious by this point). As I continued to keep my focus and pace, a woman from the TNT, who was one of the mentor/coaches from the Leukemia Lym-phoma Society, was walk-ing the opposite way. When she saw me, she turned around to join me and said, "I'll walk with you to the finish." Being fearful to ask the question of how much farther, I found the strength to ask anyway. When she turned to me and said, "Honey you've only got two blocks left," I wanted to cry, because I knew, in that moment, that I was going to make it, and had accomplished some-

thing that would transform my life forever. In my breath, I said "Thank you God," and, as I rounded the last corner, added---- "I'm running the rest of the way in". I have found myself, at many times, faced with many ob-stacles in building a holistic practice. I am certainly not alone in feeling that I can make this work, and making a living at it--- while following my true calling when often, I am called to serve without monetary return. Most of us coming into this holistic field are not entre-preneurs or are ‘business savvy.’ We are often alone, trying to figure out the deal and not aware of what is really going on in our Indus-try, or what other modalities are available to us or our clients. The Holistic Mentorship Network was founded in April of 2005 when a small

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continued group of holistic practi-tioners sat together, shar- ing ideas, thoughts and challenges. Since the beginning, I have person-ally grown in many ways and have kept my focus on the vision and mission of the mentorship group. Like the marathon, the Holistic Mentorship Net-work has been quite an undertaking. I did not decide to simply gather a group of massage thera-pists to support our indivi-dual practices, but decided to take on the whole industry. I believe that, as an industry of holistic pro-viders, whom many of us are looking to mainstream

into the medical arena, it is

ness when we remember our Source. In addition, I would like to thank Janice Billera, Religious Science Mini-ster and Spiritual Coun-selor; Susan Cloutier, Administrative Assistant, George Dominguez, COO at Sunrise House and HMN Board Member, and Suhail Jarroush, Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master and Teacher, as well as Massage Thera-pist and HMN Board Member ------all of whom have added to our theme and insight by sharing the experiences that have brought them to where they stand today.

When the time comes, I hope that you will join us in our marathon… our quest “To strengthen and support the community of holistic professionals.”

-------JMD

important that we also integrate within our own industry, if our intent of healing is as a whole unit. As founder, I have been guided by everyone who has given me support, guidance, input and in-sight. I have been bless-ed abundantly by old friends (and new ones I have made since coming into this field), and by those I have met since the initiation of the “Holistic Mentorship Network”. Through the support, team effort, belief, faith, and hope, we have come to another plateau in providing membership to the providers in our industry, and with that, our first newsletter,

named “MARCI,” ----which is an acronym for mindfulness, awareness, responsibility, compassion and intuition, and is a workshop that I had been working on, and is now ready to come to life. We are very excited about all those who have agreed to write articles for this newsletter...like Ameurfina H. Nazario, who teaches Tai Chi and Qi Gong, and is highly gifted in her art. I have had the experience to sit in and participate in her classes. She lives and breathes MARCI. The theme for our first news-letter, “Wholeness through Spiritual Integration,” has been a wonderful opportunity to look at how we can com-plete, and make whole, a team effort in providing ser-vices through a vast range of medical and alternative

choices to ourselves and our clients. In this newsletter, we have given attention to an area that all of us at one time or another have encountered ----Eating Disorders. Personally, I have been touched by the strength of Ashley, who has been will-ing to share her personal experiences with anorexia.

I want to thank Andrey Byers, Psychotherapist on Ashley’s support team, for sharing her experience of “Wholistic Healing”…. Dr. Wendy Frieling, Pedia-tric MD, who has also been a part of this team, shares her frustration, with a

“…it is important that we also integrate within our own industry…”

Let’s Go for a Run by Linda Mitchell-Dominguez, Founder

response from Ashley’s mom, Susan, in regards to “seeing things rightly” and without spiritual con-nection, we float aim-lessly, trying to find our way, so we are fortunate

to have Girolamo “Jerry” Pagano, who was intro-duced to A Course In Mira-cles (ACIM) in 1981, give us his experience with the teachings of separation and recognition of our one-

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As one of its original

Board Members, I have been asked to write a short article concerning the Holistic Mentorship Network and what I see as the organization’s future. If I had been asked to discuss this topic a year ago, it would have been a very short discussion. You might say, I have been given a crash course in the various modalities known as “Holistic and or Alter-native” therapies and health wellness care. Let me explain----- My background includes many years in the catering, food, and

The Unique Offer of the Holistic Mentorship Network by George M. Dominguez, JD

I could about the various modalities that make up the holistic disciplines. Through her efforts and my contin-ued self-education, I am now aware of the basics of the main holistic therapies ----from acupuncture, acu-pressure, aromatherapy, homeopathy, massage therapy, nutrition therapy ----to Tragger therapy, Yoga, and many more. In addition, I have learned that these therapies constitute the fastest expanding group of services in wellness and healthcare today.

In this quick education, I have come to see parallels between the growth of addiction treatment (from its roots in Alcoholics Anony-mous) and the medical models now prevalent throughout this country. In addiction treatment, besides medical attention and monitoring during withdraw-al, there are few successful programs that do not deal with spirituality, the connec-tion between mind-and- body, nutrition, recreation and relaxation; all of these being concerns of the holis-tic practitioner. I have seen the growth and proliferation of these programs, and the resultant state regulation and monitoring. Since most of these programs are or-ganized as non-profit corp-orations, taxation has not been a problem as it has

become with Massage Therapy and other body work therapies. A traditional diagram of a classic meth-odology of addiction treat-ment depicts the patient in the center of a wheel, with spokes running out to the various medical and non-medical methods of inter-vention. After assessment, it may be determined that the patient (or addict) needs spiritual counseling of their choice, intervention by a Dietician concerning proper nutrition or control of Dia-betes, etc----- there are usually legal problems requiring sessions with legal representatives, the courts, probation, or the like. Recreation, exercise or yoga might be suggested as relaxation stress reduction methodologies; facilitated

group therapy, and peer support is almost always an integral component of treat-ment; parenting skills, anger management, etc. are some of the many other intervene-tions. Other than Yoga and nutrition therapy, few of the other Holistic modalities are utilized in the treatment of addictions. These efforts are new and slowly being

“What impressed me most about Linda…was her passion for helping others…”

hospitality industry, some years as a practicing attorney and magistrate, and the last 20 years in Healthcare Admin-istration in the Alco-hol and Drug Treat-

ment field. I am presently the chief operating officer and a Board member of Sunrise House Foundation, an organization that has been providing drug and alcohol treatment in New Jersey for the past twenty-three years. Prior to 2006, my only expo-sure to Holistic Alternative healthcare, was personal exposure to the therapies and care of several chiropractors as I struggled for years with

was a working licensed practical nurse. When I met her again, I quickly learned that, while she was still an LPN, she was then working as a nationally certified Massage Therapist and just beginning to form a support net-work of like holistic practitioners. In the first few hours of our re-acquainting, my education as to the various modalities compris-ing the “holistic” field started.

What impressed me most about Linda at this initial meeting, was her passion for helping others, her self confidence, and a lust for life I had not seen before. That meeting turned into dinners, dating, a short engagement and now you could say I am married to the field, since Linda and I were married this past September. As we talked through the last nine months, I became more and more interested in what she had seen and experienced. Besides her “lessons” about----first, massage, then cranial-sacral and energy work, I

started to read everything

common lower back pain. Approximately ten months ago, I ran into an old friend I hadn’t seen in a few years, Linda Mitchell. When I

last knew her, she

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encompassed by the tra-ditional-type programs. One of the key initiatives of the Holistic Mentorship Net-work, is to raise the level of awareness of the individual holistic practi-tioners that they offer a unique, but specific ap-proach to the individual client’s dealing with daily life…that they share many common beliefs and basic tenants of the human con-dition, and that they can all benefit by sharing, or, to borrow a phrase from Alcoholics Anonymous, “their experience, strength, and hope” to

aid first themselves then their friends and clients with whatever is presenting. These efforts, at cross fert-ilization of knowledge and understanding, can only assist in furthering the suc-cessful results of the holistic therapies as a whole. The realization that the client/ patient is the center of the wheel and that all the var-ious modalities are spokes of the wheel that can offer assistance in the client’s growth and well being, is a key to success. This multi-disciplinary approach to the client/ patient is demanded by the complexity of the mind-body dichotomy pos-sessed unknowingly by most of the public.

As I have grown and assist-ed in the growth of a sub-stance abuse program such as Sunrise House, I can attest to the benefits of the cross fertilization and shar-ing of knowledge by like ad-ministrators of other pro-grams either within New Jersey or at times in region-al and national settings. While the meetings I attend-ed were organizational or educational in nature, it was the meetings before and after with our peers that the real benefits of these con-ferences were found. These “extra,” informal meetings could properly be identified as, and called support groups for, that was what actually happened during them and that was the most valuable; as healthcare administrators became human beings, and shared their experience, strength and hope for the growing field of addiction

About seven or eight years

ago, Linda and I crossed paths at our Unity Church. We both became involved in one of our passions---- children, when we joined

the Youth & Family Ministry We were blessed to spend time together, and get to know each other better when we went on Child Ministry Retreats, attended Youth Ministry meetings, or work-shops at our church, and as we shared the child-like joy that we recognized in each other. The relationships that we have built with the children of our Spiritual community continue to this day. Some of them attended Linda’s recent wedding, including my two children. Over the years, Linda and I have watched each other grow as people, …as partners, as Spirit-filled sisters. We have shared advice and laughter----we

have spoken…and listened. We have laughed and cried together, and we have felt unabashed joy as we watch each other grow into all that we are here to be.

I have also been blessed to be on Linda’s table on a regular basis. What a great healing... physical, mental and spiritual. I can say, without a doubt, that Linda indeed practices what she preaches. She lives what she believes. At this point in my life, I am thankful to be in a deeper, more consistent relationship with Linda, as we work side-by- side to move the Holistic Men-torship Network forward. I feel honored that she has entrusted her baby to me. I love that she allows me to share my gifts; to use my creativity. I am so grateful for the words I spoke to Linda in June----“If you need an Administrative Assistant, let me know. I’ll be looking for work after December.”

by Susan Cloutier Office Administrator

Spiritual Growth with Healing

The Unique Offer of the Holistic Mentorship Network (continued)

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treatment. The Holistic Men-torship Network offers the stat-ed purpose and opportunity of individual support, personal growth and the development of the growing field of the Holistic Healthcare Practitioner. It is this unique approach that fuels most of Linda Mitchell-Dominguez’s passion for this effort, and it is this effort that will make it suc-ceed. As this field of alternative holistic healthcare expands and matures in our western culture, the Holistic Mentorship Network is sure to also expand, since it is the only association that offers this much needed oppor-tunity for the personal growth of the individual practitioners. -----GMD

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When I returned home from vacation on July 5, Linda and I sat down with her husband George and figured out a way to get me on board. -----And here I am!!! I look forward to the challenges and rewards that come with being a part of this network of wholeness, love, and healing as it unfolds into greatness… nourishing all of us, who in turn nourish others. Imagine!

-----SC

You may say I’m a dreamer. But I’m not the only one.

I hope someday you’ll join us. And the world will live as one!

---John Lennon Blessings of Love, Joy and

Healing in abundance

“…I felt like a caged animal dying to break free…”

can remember, I have always felt like I am too much, like I take up too much space or something. I guess you could say that the desire to shrink myself down, to ultimately dis-appear, has been with me since the beginning. But it was only (and I use that word loosely) about two years ago that anorexia—or, Ana, personally, to me—really started to con-trol my life.

It began simply enough. I wanted to start exercising more regularly, and start eating more healthfully. So, that’s exactly what I did. One day, I started running and eating to-wards a healthier way of life. Then the shift came and I started running and

barely eating towards a carefully-constructed death. I want to stop here, for a moment, and clear up the fact that, yes, everything did begin as a desire for some sort of idealized thinness, but it turned into something less about vanity (which is what most people think anorexia is) and more about an obsession to erase my-self completely. As the pounds dropped away, concerns from friends and family, whispers from total strangers, and rumors from the mouths of people at school piled up. Every waking moment was a living hell, and Ana was the queen of my Underworld. I would wake each morning with dread, wondering who would say what…wondering

if this would be the day that I gave up completely, wonder-ing if this would be the day that I was finally pushed too far. At home and in therapy, I was being met with demands to stop doing this, to go into a hospital, to let someone help me. At school, I was being met with every-day-stressors, rumors from my peers, and comments made behind my back. I didn’t know how to handle it all. I didn’t want to handle it all. I withdrew even more. I lost more weight. I became more and more ob-sessed with reaching my goal, the welcome demise. I left the therapist whom I had been seeing for three years, unable to handle her comments or concern any longer. I stopped going out. I stopped talking to everyone, save for one highly trusted and valued friend—my then, Creative Writing teacher. I just shut down.

My first hospitalization came in March of 2005. By that time, it was one-year and fifty-two-pounds-lost since I first started running. I was told by the Vice-Principal of my school that I had to leave, and that I wasn’t allow-ed to re-enter the building until I had been medically cleared. I was pissed ---livid, even. I want-ed to kill everyone in the room — and then myself. Nothing felt real. I was taken in a police car to Newton Memorial Hospital. Upon arrival, I was taken directly to the emergency room. The severity of being admitted to the ER didn’t hit me at the time; I was too angry to think, and too convinced that everyone and their mother was overreacting and full of crap, and that I was perfectly fine.

Fast forward a month-and-a-half later, and I have been on the Eating Disorder Unit (EDU) at Somerset Medical Hospital, gained twenty-one-pounds, and then been dis-charged by my frustrated doctor for “not complying with our rules and making things more difficult than they have to be.” I didn’t care that he thought “you’re a lost cause. You’ll never recover from this.” All I wanted to do, was go home. Three-months-later, I am taken to Newton Memorial Hospital for the second time and, once again, seen in the emergency room. I have lost the weight I gained at Som-erset, and then some. I now weigh seventy-eight-

pounds. My mother can’t stop crying. My second stay at New-ton lasted two weeks. I was forced to stay there while the doctors and nurses tried to figure out where to put me: They couldn’t keep me because they didn’t have the re-sources to treat me. No one else wanted to take me because, between my low weight and erratic heartbeat, I was a liability. I felt like a caged animal dying to break free. Fast forward two-months-later and I have been to Golisano Children’s Hos-pital at Strong, in Rochest-er, NY, whose sole pur-pose was to push food on me and get my weight up as quickly as possible,

You do not see the power

You do not see the strength it takes…

…To chip away To minimize

To shrink down what was always too big

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It seems so glamorous in

the beginningg, you know? Losing weight, receiving compliments, having people ask you if you’re aa ballerina; having people tell you how beautiful you are, how disciplined. But there is always that moment, that sudden shift in time that, looking back, you’re never quite able to pinpoint: That moment where the compliments suddenly ss ttoopp—“You’re getting too thin”——and the concerned questt iions suddenly begin—“Is evveerything okay?” ---the momment where the beauty and thee ddiiscipline of what you aree doing and achieving is seeenn by no one but you. I don’t really know exactly how ii tt started for me. I do know that for as long as I

Spiritual Growth with Healing (continued)

Weighing Life: My Story by Ashley Cloutier

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The Holistic Mentorship Network

with the help of high-carb and high-fat foods. They also weren’t impartial to tube-feeding, which I learned the hard way, if you were resistant to their tactics. Directly from Strong, I was taken to the Renfrew Center of Philadelphia, which is set up more like a half-way house than a hospital. I spent the end of August and most of September there, watching summer fade into fall, as silently and as irre-vocably as my desire to try. When I finally leave Ren-frew, after signing a 24-hour notice, which basically states that you are terminating your treatment, despite the med-

ical advice of your doctors, I am far sicker than anyone could have ever imagined, and so consumed with my compulsion to whittle myself into oblivion, that I can bare-ly think of anything else. I have gained thirty-pounds in sixty days, and I am deter-mined to get rid of each-and-every-one of them.

I didn’t go anywhere after my third time at Newton Memor-ial Hospital, except home. I told my mother that I would do anything—anything—if she kept me from having to go into another hospital, to go through another program. Anything turned out to mean working with a therapist, a nutritionist, and a weight monitor—three amazing people whom I have dubbed -----My Team. Some days I hate them. Some days I fight everything they are saying, convinced that I am right, and that the life—life being the operative word—I had with Ana is better than the one I have right now.

Some days I want to tell them all to screw off and leave me the hell alone, because I just want to give up on this process. But other days—most days—I welcome their help, thankful that they care enough to stick by and help me, listen to me, advise me and direct me, and grateful that they are willing to let me do things at my pace and my comfort level—something I didn’t have in the hospital settings. They are giving me tools to build a future with; faith when I have none; strength until I can find my own; light to navigate the darkness. They are my Human Flashlights and I honestly don’t know where I

would be without them.

“They are giving me tools to build a future with…”

I’m not going to lie----- Recovery sucks. It’s hard, and it’s frustrating, and it’s emotionally, mentally, and physically draining. It will leave you aggravated and annoyed with the people around you who tell you that you’re “healthy” or “cured” simply because you’ve gained weight. It will leave you staring at your changing body and face in the mirror,

grimacing in disgust and horror at the thing you are becoming. It will leave you crying into your hands, or screaming into your pillow, because you just can’t take it anymore…But it will also keep you out of the hospital. It will keep you away from IV’s, and needles, and doc-tors who don’t understand. It will keep you away from 5am weigh-ins and food in quan-tities that make you feel sick. It will give you the freedom to use the bathroom without having to ask someone to unlock the door. It will give you the ability to go outside when you decide you’re ready. It will give you an identity other than the diagnosis in your file and the data on your chart.

It will give you choice,

and power, and control—

real control.

“You just have to let it.”

-----AC

In Memory of Emelia D: Missing you, loving you, and

hoping you've finally found peace

Newton Hospital; ICU

Christmas Eve and seventy-two-pounds

Machine lights blinking Around her 5’ 7” frame

Doctors whispering

Outside her realm of consciousness

We’ll be lucky If she makes it

through the night

So strange This thing called health

Like putting on make-up for the first time:

Unsure hands, shaking

Hesitant to produce results Hesitant to add to the blank

slate of familiar-nothing

Hesitant to ruin what took so long to create

I am leaving you, Ana

Pushing you away before I change my mind Again

(Do you hate me for that?) And I am replanting my roots

Growing taller

Bit by bit Inch by inch

(Who knew the sun could hurt so

much?) Blooming into my own

covering you with my emerging shadow

(Will you even miss me?)

Taking up the space That is rightfully mine

(I’ll miss you too; I’ll miss you)

Weighing Life: My Story by Ashley Cloutier (continued)

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A Message from Dr. Wendy Frieling…

Dear Susan, Linda et al, The day you left a recent message, I had decided to let you know that I cannot follow through with the article. When I got your message, I felt really badly that I had already agreed and figured

I should at least try to deliver on my promise. Here is the scoop. I tried to write this piece and have come to the conclusion that I really have nothing to say. Not that you need to know my inner thoughts but, I'm feeling really disillusioned about what we are able to accomplish in the medical world these days.

I think eating disorders are more complicated than anything and I really don't think I do much at all to help other than avert crisis. Please accept my sincere apologies. I just cannot follow through on my pledge. Your mission is noble. I wish you the best, Wendy

Thank you for your wishes. With much gratitude for a year that has brought us full circle,

Susan Cloutier

“Often times in our profession, whether medical or alternative, we come up against our own demons and frustrations of helping another… Those are the

times we may not realize the significant role we play in someone’s life… Dr. Frieling has been one of those unique individuals that have played a

huge part in Ashley’s life.” -----Linda Mitchell-Dominguez

…A Response from Susan Cloutier

Hey, Dr. Frieling- Thank you for your honesty about doing the article. Although I understand your frustration with eating disorders and not finding a place within you to write from, I know that without Ashley showing up to see you she would not have been admitted to the hospital when it was crucial, but also,

your support and monitoring

would not have allowed Andrey and Dr. Bump to have their piece (peace) in Ash's beautiful recovery. Even if you can't write about it because of disillusionment, know that, in my opinion, you have been crucial to the health of the beautiful, young woman you will see in your office this week.

You have most definitely been a major part of the team that saved my daughter's life. I hope that this knowledge can continue to spur you on to find new ways of educating young girls and women as to their importance from the inside out!

You get them at a young enough age to make a difference. Perhaps that is the reason Ash has blessed yours, Andrey's and Dr. Bump's lives...to touch that place within that yearns to make a difference! You will always hold a very special place in my heart and, I know, in Ashley's.

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In many cases, the ideal

situation for a patient is to have a collaborative pro-fessional team. The effect of such an effort can be felt on varying levels by both the patient and the professional. It really frees each profess-sional to focus on what they do best and lifts some of the burdens of trying to multi-task. If I’m working, for example, with a patient with an eating disorder, I can leave the bulk of the medical and nutritional

needs to a collaborating physician and nutritionist. Power struggles over weighing-in issues and food intake can be avoid-ed and the underlying psychodynamic issues can remain the priority. It is also time efficient for all these issues to be cared for simultaneously by different people. The mutual professional sup-port can aid in the crea-tive process and be help-

ful in preventing “burn-out” in particularly long term, high risk situations.

Spiritual Nourishment by Rev. Janice Billera

There is a Divine Power in

the Universe that is operating in every moment. This power is the Intelligence that holds the planets in their places, and impels each seed to burst forth into a flower. It is the same Intelligence that is the pulse of life that beats each living heart and provides order to the fabric of life itself. When we are aligned with our Spiri-tual Nature, there is order in our “bodies,” our thoughts, and in our affairs. Actually, if any one of our bodies are out of balance, be it spiritual, mental, emotional or physical, there is disorder in our lives. I find it interesting as a mini-ster, that many people I

counsel come to me as a

last resort. They come after they have exhausted medical, psychological and nutritional counseling, and after they have used their brain to search the Internet for factual information ad nauseum. It seems that connecting to the Source of all life, whether we call that source God, Jesus, Buddha, Mohamed, Spirit, Creator or Bob, is often the last place we turn when we are “out of order”. I am not suggesting that any of the other modalities are not val-uable, quite the contrary. We are a holistic community after all, and when we address all of our “bodies” with every tool we have available, we exper-ience wholeness. I am simply reminding us, that when we experience wholeness in a holy way, divine order is re-stored. When we are not con-nected Spiritually, we forget that there is this Divine Power working in every moment to hold things in divine order, so we think we have to do it ourselves. We think we have to be in control, so we can

always feel safe. The thing that brings us to our knees every time is when we real-ize that we cannot control the world, or even our little part of the world, so we feel unsafe. We forget that it is this Divine Universal Power and Presence that keeps us safe, so we suffer. One way that we think we can have at least a modicum of control is with the food we eat. Why food? It’s easily available, it’s legal and we have been given so many messages about it all of our lives, it is easy to use the distortions against ourselves. We call the resulting maladies “eating disorders”, when actually, it is a way that one uses control to find order.

Whether it is binging (out of control) then purging (to control) or controlling what food is taken in, even to the point of abstinence, it is a way of controlling the out-side to feel better inside. Even something as mild as attempting to nurture and comfort oneself with food, is trying to control an inner hunger that can only be filled by Spirit. This beha-vior may seem out of order, but it is actually a way to maintain control in a world that appears to be unsafe and out of control. It is a manifestation of disorder and disharmony between our physical body, our emo-tions, our mental thoughts and perceptions and our disconnection to Spirit. That is why it is important to employ all the magnificent tools that are available in the holistic community to treat eating disorders, especially those that facil-itate the intricate and deli-cate balance between our spiritual nature and our human nature. Then we become aware of the in-ternal guidance that is continued on next page

One for the Team by Andrey Byers, LCSW

I believe the patient ultimately benefits from not only being helped by team members, who can focus on their particular skills, but also by hearing similar messages reinforced. It really gives credibility to the whole process. I have also had patients report that they experienced tremendous healing due to the comfort of knowing they had a “team” behind them. -----AB

MSW from Columbia University. Practicing Psychotherapist since

1990. Currently in practice at MJC Institute in Ogdensburg, NJ

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Spiritual Nourishment by Rev. Janice Billera (continued)

always available as this Di-

vine Intelligence leads us to healthier choices. Yoga, med-itation and prayer are perfect spiritual tools to bring us to internal harmony where we can then integrate better nutri-tional practices. Visualization opens the door to see our-selves as God sees us… perfect, whole and complete, vital, healthy and strong. We are blessed with modalities that integrate our emotional,

physical and mental bod-ies, but let’s not forget that when Spirit leads the way, all things fall into divine or-der, easily and gracefully. -----Rv.JB Rev. Janice Billera is the Interim Spiritual Leader at

the Unity Church of Sussex County, in

Lafayette, NJ, where she celebrates Sunday Service

every week at 11:00.

Her thoughtful and dynamic lessons always carry a powerful spiritual message that can easily be integrated into every area of life, resulting in personal empowerment and balance. Rev. Janice also provides

spiritual counseling to individuals, couples and

groups. She can be reached at 973-383-6277.

The Idea of Separation in A Course of Miracles

by Girolamo Pagano

Continued on next page

A Course In Miracles

gives us a way to understand the world and ourselves holis-tically, providing a sure found-ation for the flow of holistic practice. The Course teaches that to heal is to make whole and that the healed mind shares the single purpose of healing with all minds. In the Course, it is impossible for our true Self, Who is for-ever One, and one with It’s Source, even to think the thought of separation. Only our little selves, our egos, each one experience-ing itself to be apart from others, could make up the idea of separation and then believe it to be true. The Course offers a myth of separation, explaining how the impossible came to be in our belief. The ups and downs, the pleasures and

sorrows, the achievements and failures, the skills and the struggles, the health and the sickness, the stories of the ego-----all take place in the dreaming of the mind. The whole and perfect Mind that is created by God through extension, the Mind that is part of God and therefore has and is every-thing, dreams it can be special and have a unique existence apart from the Creator. The mind dreams that it is part of a unique and special body with a will dif-ferent from God’s Will. The ego comes into exis-tence as the self within the sleeping mind who believes the dream is real. The ego believes it is separate from God and that its will has pre-vailed against the Will of God. It feels guilt over defy-ing the Will of God and it fears the punishing power of God. The ego then projects this guilt and fear outward onto other bodies and the world in a constant effort to get rid of them by seeing

them outside the self. It then becomes possible to judge and condemn others for their sins and to become a victim of attack from out-side the self. The ego will stop at nothing to maintain the denial of its projections, believing that therein its safety lies. The Voice for God, or Holy Spirit, or Higher Self, or the Christ within, calls to the sleeping mind to awaken and remember its true Iden-tity. A Course In Miracles is a course in putting aside the ego and learning to listen to the Voice for God. The mind awakens and remembers through practicing forgive-ness of everyone and every-thing without exception. When everything in the dream has been healed and reflects only the Will of God, the dreamer is ready to fully awa-ken into the eternal Oneness. Learning and practicing the Course heals our perception and makes it holy, or holistic. In the process, miracles occur to

demonstrate the illusory nature of the world of separa-tion and the truth of our one-ness with each other and with our Source.

Separateness asserts itself everywhere as an underlying assumption of the un-mindful world. Realizing there is no separation is the same thing as becoming mindful, or waking up. Holistic practice sets us on a journey that appears to be both outward

and inward. Our journey

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takes us outward to inter-act with the world in heal-ing ways and inward to heal our minds. The holis-tic professional is commit-

ted to perceiving wholeness where others may perceive separateness: we try to nur-ture, strengthen and extend wholeness. Holistic profess-

sionals shine the light of unity on the world of separation and make an opening for miracles to occur. -----GP

Girolamo “Jerry” Pagano was introduced to A Course In Miracles (ACIM) in 1981 and over the next two years, he completed the Workbook in the context of Shanti Rica Joseph’s inspired and challenging Course

study/support group in New York City. Since 1986 he has practiced the teachings of ACIM doing child protective services social work in Sussex County, his home community since 1978.

Therapy with the Angels A TRUE STORY by Suhail Jarroush

A lady calls me after seeing

my name on her Aetna Alter-native booklet for a lower back pain massage. She said that she was six months preg-nant. She had severe lower back pain, very painful scia-tica and her legs are killing her. I gave her an appoint-ment and my intent was to use Muscle Release Therapy to relieve her pains. Her appointment was late at night about 8:00 pm.

My little friends were whispering in my head not to meet with her alone at our center this late, because the other therapist at the center will be all gone by 8:00 pm, and I was worried something might go wrong and I might need help. So I called Suz-anne, my partner, who is one of my Reiki students (and is a Reiki Master/ Teacher, too) to be with me at the office. She left her husband at home, and came this late to help me. When the lady came in for the pain management session, she said that she’d had preg-nancy massage and visited a chiropractor, but her pains are still there. She was very apprehensive of what I could do to ease her pains. But, she was very delighted to see Suzanne with me in a very well lit, comfortable room. We supplied her with every comfortable means, such as long body pillow, a head rest and many other small cushions, to support her body and her head; then I started with her a medita-tive breathing technique to ease her mental anguish which was causing her more stress and pain. As I started

working on her different therapy techniques such as, Pregnancy massage, MRT, Reiki,Seichim, Energy Bal-ancing, Acupressure, Su Jok, Vita flex, and other techniques started to flow through me. It did not take me more than forty-five minutes of concentrated work and the lady was com-pletely pain free. Her tears were flowing with happiness and relief to a point that she wanted to take me home with her, ----ha-ha-ha, just kidding. After I finished the pain management treatment, I looked up towards Suzanne and saw her standing look-ing at me in awe. She said: “I wish you could see the aura around you when you were working--------

----as if the hands of the angels were working with you.” And the angels were working with me. I felt them all around me and within me, guiding my heart and my hands.

I am retelling this story to let all

therapists know that as long as they supply

their clients with a comfortable atmosphere

to ease their anguish, then they Center, Shield and Ground; then attach the unconditional love of

their hearts to their higher-self when working

with their clients or patients, the whole

universe will conspire to make their work a piece of

art specially custom-designed by the hands of

God and specially formulated for whatever

their clients need.

---SJ

The Idea of Separation in A Course of Miracles continued

Since January 2005, he has facilitated a weekly ACIM

study/support group for active students of the Course at Unity

Church of Sussex County, where he regularly volunteers as singer and

pianist.

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HOLISTIC WORD SEARCH

Q L M S O W B R E A T H E R L C K P E A C E

D J B R K A M E V W X O U B D N J G D F W N

J L A H S C S U J D T G I J P S T U Y Z B E

M A O E J U K B M C R D I K Q Q M P S A U R

E O B A E P T R S J A N N Z W V A O B U S G

N W S L J U A B E W N Z T O O R S N A G O Y

T J E I A N I C J E S B U I E A S B L M Z T

O R A N T C C A G O F N I H M D A F A W X P

R V B G E T H R C C O A T I O N G S N B V Y

L A D M J U I E S A R A I K C Z E J C U U O

S P I R I R L O V D M A O Y Y U L C E J K Q

V O M E Y E M V I O A F N O I T I R T U N J

Y U X I M A O B R U T U O P R L O O Q C B A

B M A K T W E A L L I D J U I E S A L M Z U

G K O I S X B C Q A O A H S C S U C A G O F

A E C O A K V X A M N V O M E Y E M D I K S

BREATHE SOMATIC MASSAGE HEALING RELEASE

TRANSFORMATION PEACE ACUPUNCTURE REIKI SPIRIT

ENERGY BALANCE AROMATHERAPY TAI CHI MENTOR

YOGA INTEGRITY NUTRITION INTUITION DOULA

Puzzle Designed by SUSAN CLOUTIER

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Back Page Story Headline

Our Mission:

To create a unified community of compassionate holistic practitioners that will contribute to enhancing our profession and ourselves by providing a supportive space to share, learn, teach, grow, and lead.

The Holistic Mentorship Network Board of Trustees has defined a holistic practitioner as... Any practitioner who offers a therapeutic approach intended to treat health issues or

conditions through a process that views the physical, emotional, energetic, and spiritual aspects of existence as co-equal in

addressing health and illness…Any practitioner who seeks to address health conditions in terms of the "whole person" rather

than as disorders affecting or confined to only specific functional parts, systems, components, or organs could be considered a

candidate to become a member in our Holistic Mentorship Network.

The Holistic Mentorship Network

Board Members George Dominguez

Linda Mitchell-Dominguez Kevin Deighan Suhail Jarroush

Cethelen macEalaionta Donna Price

CONTACT US at:

956 Ridge Road Newton, NJ 07860

PHONE:

973-300-1184 FAX:

973-300-1189 E-MAIL:

info@mentorshipnetwork.com

Or Visit on the Web!

www.mentorshipnetwork.com

Holistic Mentorship Network 956 Ridge Road

Newton, NJ 07860